A Monster's Paradise (Away From Whipplethorn Book Three)

by A W Hartoin

  Mom landed next to Dad. “What do you mean, worse? Worse than what happened today?”

  “The return of the royal family was supposed to calm everything down,” said Dad.

  “It appears the opposite has happened,” said Bentha.

  “The king is trying to take control,” said Lrag.

  Judd leaned down and put his chin on his hands. “Isn’t that what kings do?”

  “It was thought he would compromise. Grant rights instead of taking them,” said Bentha.

  “You mean the curfew. That’s not so bad,” said Mom. “We can deal with that.”

  “The curfew is only the tip of his sword. More is coming.” Bentha stood up and walked away, slashing his sword.

  Lrag watched him, his bulky muscles tense. “There have been skirmishes all over the city. That head you saw was one of many. If this continues, the king will declare martial law.”

  “What does that mean?” asked Iris.

  “We won’t be able to move around the city freely. Finding the vermillion will be much more difficult,” said Dad.

  “Don’t tell Penrose,” said Mom.

  We all glanced toward the archway to the bedrooms. Miss Penrose, Horc, and Lucrece were in Tess’s bedroom having dinner there.

  “We won’t,” I said.

  Mom gave me a sharp look.

  “I won’t.” I could tell she didn’t believe me. Like I would really tell Miss Penrose the city was all crazy. She’d just get upset and that wasn’t good for her. I knew what I was doing.

  “In any case, Bentha and I might not be much help to you,” said Lrag.

  “Why not?” asked Mom.

  Bentha marched over. The needles on his head stuck straight up. “Because the king is blaming the unrest on the wingless fairies.”

  “But that mob had wings,” I said.

  “It’s a tense situation,” said Lrag. “The king was supposed to consider granting equal rights to the wingless, but he dismissed it out of hand.”

  “We will not take this insult.” Bentha danced across the table, swinging his sword. “The king will be made to see reason.”

  Lrag stood up and blocked his path. “We will not do anything.”

  “This is an outrage.”

  Lrag took Bentha’s sword and sheathed it. “Yes. But it is not our outrage. We’re here to save Penrose.”

  “I, Bentha, greatest sword of the mall, will save Miss Penrose and the French fairies. Let us formulate a plot. I will execute it.”

  Dad slapped his forehead. “Calm down.”

  “Calm is the enemy of triumph,” said Bentha.

  “And of sense,” said Mom.

  “Let’s get back to Penrose. We have to start somewhere,” said Dad.

  “We’ll start at Notre Dame. Lucien said it was the center of fairy life in Paris when he and Grandma Vi were here. It probably still is,” I said.

  “Agreed. Bentha and I will take Matilda and Iris tomorrow,” said Lrag. “We must go before the city becomes to difficult to navigate.”

  Mom balled up her fists in her lap. “No. It’s too dangerous. Matilda and Iris will stay here.”

  “I’m going,” I said.

  “Me, too,” said Iris, although she looked a lot less sure about it than I did.

  “I already told you that you’re not going,” said Mom.

  “I didn’t come to Paris to stay home,” I said.

  “You didn’t come to Paris to be beheaded by a crazed mob either.”

  “I’m not going to get beheaded.”

  “Anything could happen out there,” said Mom.

  “Anything could happen in here,” I said. “Delphine and Roberto got in.”

  Mom shivered and Dad put an arm around her. “That’s enough.”

  Lrag knelt in front of Mom and Dad. “I’m afraid Matilda must go. She is the healer and your mother’s apprentice. From what I understand Viola knew the vermillion during her time here. If so, Matilda has the best chance of convincing them to help. But she can’t do it alone. Iris is her ears.”

  “But the last time they were out on their own…,” Mom trailed off and looked at my leg. I tucked it under my skirt, but not fast enough to avoid her grimace.

  Bentha drew his sword and did a complicated series of sword thrusts. “I will protect the ladies with my life.”

  “He will,” said Lrag. “And so will I.”

  “Me, too,” said Tess.

  “And me,” said Judd. “They’ll never be alone.”

  Mom cuddled into Dad’s arms and nodded. “For Penrose, I agree.”

  Marie arrived at nine in the morning as promised and almost had Tess and Judd out of the apartment before Rebecca’s eyes focused over her latte.

  “Where are you going?” she asked.

  “Notre Dame,” said Marie, placing Lrag and Bentha onto Tess’s shoulder.

  Rebecca yawned and rubbed her red-rimmed eyes. “It’s awfully early.”

  “Are you alright? Didn’t you sleep?”

  “Barely. Tess and Judd should stay in to rest. They won’t enjoy it on so little sleep.”

  Judd slipped on his jacket. “I slept good. Let’s go.”

  “Me, too,” said Tess.

  “Are you kidding?” asked Rebecca. “That smell was horrendous. How could you sleep through that?”

  “I didn’t smell anything,” said Judd and Tess nodded.

  “Really? Maybe it was just our room. It smelled like something died in there.”

  Curiosity lit up in Marie’s eyes and I smiled as she trotted out of the room and returned a minute later. “Doesn’t smell now. Maybe you dreamt it.”

  “Evan smelled it, too, but you’re right it’s gone this morning,” said Rebecca.

  Marie herded Tess and Judd through the archway and opened the front door. “All’s well that ends well. Got to go.”

  “But they have to eat.”

  “I’ll feed them. Never fear,” said Marie.

  “Not espresso and croissants,” said Rebecca.

  “Don’t be ridiculous. Cappuccino goes better with pastry. Bye, dear.”

  Rebecca’s mouth fell open and Marie closed the door. Judd and Tess ran to the coffin-sized elevator and jumped inside. Iris and I hovered over their heads as Marie squeezed in and pressed the button. Rebecca came out of the apartment, yelling something about a cell phone. Marie waved and the door closed. Judd did a fist pump, almost colliding with Iris.

  “We did it,” said Judd. “We rock.”

  “We do indeed rock,” said Marie.

  “It didn’t hurt that Mom was so tired,” said Tess.

  Judd sneered. “I think she’s losing it. How could something smell so bad and be gone in the morning?”

  Bentha hopped up and down on Tess’s shoulder. “I smelled the smell.”

  “Of course you did,” said Lrag. “Go ahead and tell us. What was it?”

  “I don’t know, but I will discover the truth. I am Bentha.”

  “We know who you are. Why don’t you know what the smell was?”

  “It emanated from under the parents’ door. I did not investigate. I was exercising.” Bentha did a series of complicated kung fu moves he had picked up from watching Bruce Lee movies with Judd, complete with crazy facial expressions and a lot of “Waaaaaa!”

  I touched Iris’s hand. “Where’s the egg?”

  “Miss Penrose has it. Rufus will keep it warm.”

  “Good. It’ll be safe there.” I still wasn’t sure about taking the egg to Paris. Trading one dangerous place for another didn’t seem to be worth it. I only hoped the commander knew what he was doing.

  We went through the gaping mouth door and stopped on the steps. I half expected the royal guard to be there waiting or some crazed mob, but the street was empty of fairies. It was also empty of limousines.

  “Where are Earl and Stanley?” asked Tess.

  “Getting their teeth cleaned. It will probably take all day, considering the state of their mouths,” said Mari
e, shuddering slightly.

  “Please tell me you’re not driving,” said Lrag.

  “Please say you are,” said Judd. “We’ll get there in like two minutes.”

  Marie flashed him a wicked grin, which he returned in kind. “Alas, no. I haven’t found a car to suit me and the limo has some flat tires.”

  “How many?” asked Tess.

  “Only three.”

  “What’d you do, get airborne and blow them out?” asked Judd.

  “Yes, exactly. But it was more than once. You’d be surprised how many times you can do that before a tire blows,” said Marie, taking Judd’s arm.

  “I wish I was there.”

  “You’re the only one,” said Lrag.

  “Incorrect,” said Bentha. “A swordmaster can handle anything.”

  “How about you handle yourself.”

  Bentha had kung fued his way to the edge of Tess’s shoulder and was near to falling off. He corrected without ever seeming that he’d made a mistake and shouted, “Onward!”

  “Which way?” I asked.

  Marie pointed to a metro station at the end of the block and we headed out. I kept looking around for other fairies, but the street was quiet. No mobs. No anything. It was like everyone thought the curfew was twenty-four seven.

  Marie led us down a wide set of stairs to the metro stop under the street. She taught Judd how to buy tickets and we got on a train to Notre Dame. The car was full of humans, some french, but there were plenty of tourists, too. At first I thought there weren’t any fairies, but Iris spotted some at the end of the car. They looked like ashrays to me, being nearly translucent and dripping with water. They kept pretty busy, acting like they didn’t see us and got off at the first stop.

  “Where is everybody?” asked Iris. “I thought we’d see a lot of species.”

  “They’re around, just trying to stay away from the revolutionaries and the king’s guards,” said Lrag.

  We got off at the train at the Notre Dame stop, but the instant we did Iris grabbed my arm. “There’s fighting.” She pointed to the ticket machines. A troop of royal guards had a brown-winged fairy surrounded and were hitting him with clubs.

  Bentha unsheathed his sword. “I will save him!”

  Before anyone could react, he somersaulted off Tess’s shoulder.

  Judd yelled, “No!” He lunged for Bentha, but missed as the ponderosa ran along the back of a bench. Judd scrambled through the crowd, knocking into tourists. Even with his long human legs, he couldn’t quite reach Bentha. He was always just a second out of reach.

  “Get him, Matilda!” yelled Tess.

  I jerked out of my shocked state and darted through the humans. I was too late, but Judd wasn’t. Bentha hopped up onto a trashcan rim and ran around the circle toward the royal guard and their victim. They weren’t looking, too busy whacking the brown-winged fairy. Bentha got to the other side and launched himself, sword raised. Judd leapt after him with his hands outstretched and nabbed Bentha in midair. He collided with the royal guard and scattered them. The brown-winged fairy spun off and fell to the ground. Judd skidded to a halt with his hands cupped together and I bumped into his head before I could correct. I got tangled in his hair and slid down the strands to land on his shoulder. The brown-winged fairy stood up and our eyes met. I pointed to the exit and mouthed, “Go.” He touched his forehead to me and zipped away before the guard recovered and saw him. I burrowed deeper into Judd’s hair to conceal myself and that’s when I realized every human in the station was staring at Judd.

  “It’s okay,” he said. “Um…I got my ball. I got it.”

  Judd marched back to Marie and Tess. “We better get out of here before the royal guard realizes what happened.”

  Tess scurried away up the stairs leading to the street above. I just caught a glimpse of Lrag and Iris tucked inside the collar of her sweater. Marie and Judd followed more slowly with Judd saying, “Ow,” under his breath repeatedly. I stayed under his hair just in case the guards followed, but they didn’t. We came out onto the street under a metro sign that was so ornate with wrought iron and golden lamps, it looked like it been put there a hundred years before.

  Marie pulled Judd away from the entrance. “What is it?”

  Judd opened his hands. Bentha stood in the middle on a hundred red dots and he was hopping mad. I mean, he was actually hopping with a flushed face under his ponderosa paint. “How dare you interfere with Bentha!”

  “Quiet, you maniac,” hissed Marie. “You could’ve been arrested, and look what you’ve done to Judd’s hand.”

  I flew down to get a closer look. “How many times did you stab Judd?”

  “About three million,” said Judd.

  “Does it hurt?” asked Tess.

  “Duh.”

  “Shut up. I was trying to be nice.”

  “Try harder.”

  Iris flew between them. “How could you, Bentha? Judd was just trying to protect you.”

  Bentha marched up the length of Judd’s thumb and pointed his sword at her. “I don’t need protection. I give it to the weak and fallen. Now my honor has been besmirched. I must repair the damage.” He crouched to spring off Judd’s thumb, but Lrag leapt off Tess, grabbed him by the throat, and held him at arm’s length.

  “Listen, you skinny piece of driftwood, your honor is of no importance. Judd was right to stop you. We’re here to save Penrose. If you want to risk your scrawny neck after that, it’s up to you, but you’ll do it far from Matilda and Iris. We can’t attract attention to the girls.”

  Bentha stopped struggling and Lrag set him down. The flush faded from his thin cheeks and he sheathed his sword.

  “I apologize, my ladies. I should not have risked our mission.” Bentha bowed low. “Those guards ought to have been taught a lesson, though.”

  Marie pulled a small water bottle out of her purse and unscrewed the top. “I’m afraid I do not agree. Out of the way, you two.”

  Bentha and Lrag jumped onto Tess’s hand and Marie poured the bottle over Judd’s hand. He let out a high-pitched shriek and danced away, clutching his hand.

  “That wasn’t water!” he yelled.

  “Of course not. It’s vodka. Good for all occasions,” said Marie.

  “That hurt!”

  “Vodka is an excellent disinfectant. Good for cleaning toilets, too.”

  “When did you ever clean a toilet?” I asked.

  “It’s happened a few times. Desperate times, you know. Ah, there’s a creperie. Just what we need.” Marie marched away and we followed her up to the crepe stand. She ordered in French while Tess and Judd claimed a table under the shade of a tree. The shop owner brought out a tray filled with crepes and three coffee cups.

  “Dude, you really got us coffee?” asked Judd. “That’s epic.”

  Marie settled in her seat and laid out a napkin for us fairies to sit on. “Don’t get too excited. It’s cafe miel with a half shot of espresso. I can’t have you too hyped up.”

  “I’ll take it.” Judd took a sip. “That’s got honey and cinnamon in it.”

  Tess’s eyes got all glassy. “I don’t even need the crepes.”

  “Well, you’ll eat them anyway. Rebecca expects me to feed you. I wouldn’t mention the cafe miel though. You know your mother,” said Marie as she served everyone including us.

  We ate and watched the small park across the street. It was full of strollers and young children playing in the grass. That was what I imagined Paris to be like, not people getting attacked in the streets. Iris and I stuffed ourselves with Nutella and laid back while the humans finished. Then Iris sat bolt upright, a fast move for my rotund little sister.

  A chubby toddler stood on the edge of the fountain in the park and pointed down into the water. “Monstre, Maman!”

  “Did she say monster?” asked Judd.

  “She did,” said Marie.

  The little girl jerked back, screaming. She ran along the edge of the fountain. Out of the water behind he
r, a long tubular creature slithered up onto the fountain’s rim. It chased the little girl around the fountain on short, finned legs. It was green with a lacy fringe that ran down the length of its foot-long body.

  “Holy crap! Do you see that?” Judd jumped to his feet.

  The child’s mother snatched her up. She kept screaming and pointing at the creature, who’d stopped at the edge of the fountain and was doing a kind of dance back and forth. Its forked tongue waved at the child as she shrieked, and the fringe around its head popped out and then folded as it danced. It looked almost happy, like it was teasing the child.

  Marie yanked Judd back into his seat. “Quiet. They don’t see it and neither do you.”

  The creature gave one more hiss and leapt back into the water. Then it climbed up to the first tier of the fountain and dove into the basin, and began flipping around like an otter. Marie was right. None of the humans saw it, except the toddler who was near to hysterical.

  I turned to Lrag and Bentha. They sat with pieces of crepe halfway to their mouths.

  “What was that?” I asked them.

  Lrag blinked. “I have no idea.”

  Bentha just stared. I think he was struck dumb. I wouldn’t have thought it possible.

  “I know what it is,” said Iris and we all stared at her.

  “Really?” I asked.

  “Gerald showed me in the Speciesapedia. It’s a sea serpent.”

  Tess wrinkled her nose. “But it had legs.”

  “Sea serpents have legs. They’re sort of like amphibians. That one was an Icelandic flutterflange.”

  “What’s it doing in Paris?” asked Judd.

  “I don’t know. I guess they get around.”

  Marie drained her coffee cup and stood up. “It’s time we get to Notre Dame.” She shot a look at the flutterflange. “I have a bad feeling about that thing.”

  “Do they bite, Iris?” asked Tess.

  “They definitely bite.”

  “Let’s get out of here then.”

  While the others headed down the street towards Notre Dame, I hung back and then zipped up to the fountain. The serpent spotted me instantly and climbed the tall spire. I hovered, taking in the green scales and the waving worm-like tendrils around its mouth.

  “Take a picture, wood fairy,” said the serpent. “It’ll last longer.”