Hustle and Heart

by Alison Mello

  “Are you ready to wash it all away?”

  “Can Karen do it?”

  “Sure, sweetie,” Karen coddles as she takes the soap from me. She rubs the soap between her fingers and lathers Grace’s legs, pretending to tickle her as she does it. Grace giggles, and when she rinses the soap away all her tears are forgotten. Karen helps her wash her hands. We dry her up, put her socks and shoes back on, and she’s out the door, ready to play again.

  “Well, that was easier than I thought. I think it was sweet how you helped with her. Thank you.”

  “You calmed her down. I just cleaned her up.”

  “I know, but she’s already taken with you.” I stop for a second, hoping I don’t scare her. “She asks about you.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, when you’re not here, she asks when you’re coming over again or if you’re having dinner with us. Stuff like that.”

  “That’s sweet. How’s Gabe?”

  “I think he likes having Jason to hang with. He’s older and understands a lot more than Grace does. I don’t think he honestly has an opinion one way or the other.”

  “Jesse, I’m going to the store,” Josephine calls out, ending our conversation.

  “Okay, Mom.”

  “Are we going to be picnicking more at the field?”

  I look at Karen. “Will you join us?”

  “Works for me.”

  “Yeah, it’s probably the easiest way for us all to have something to eat before practice. We’ll have to keep it light for the boys, though.”

  “Got it. I’ll be back.” She walks out the door.

  “She is an amazing woman.”

  “She is.” I take her hand and lead her to the back porch where we take a seat on the loveseat to watch the kids. “I owe her for all she’s done. I know it’s probably weird for you being here with her here, but she’s done so much for me.”

  I stare off at the kids and think back to the day she called me.

  “Jesse, it’s Mom.”

  “What’s wrong, Mom? Is everyone okay?” Concern is evident in her voice.

  She sighs into the phone. “Jesse, I don’t know how to say this, but I think Della is back to using drugs or something.”

  “Mom, I know you don’t trust her and rightfully so, but she has assured me she’s clean.” I’m so angry, and I’m not sure if it’s at the accusation of my wife using drugs or that fact that it’s possibly true.

  “She’s been going out and leaving me with the kids, and I’m not just talking about an overnight stay. She took off for the weekend and when she came back she was a mess, stumbling and slurring her words.”

  “Mom are you sure?” God, I want to believe she’s clean, but I trust my gut and after hearing my mom’s voice my gut is telling to listen to my mom.

  “Jesse, I’m here for the kids and I’ll do what I can to get her help, but I’m telling you she’s involved in something. She’s not herself, and I’m sure it’s hard to swallow when you’re not here seeing it, but I’m telling you something is off.”

  “I don’t know what to say. I can’t believe she would go back down that road.”

  “I hope I’m wrong, but I’m sorry to say, Jesse, I doubt it.” She sounds so worried.

  “Okay, Mom, I’m going to check some things and I’ll call you back.[20][21]”

  My Della doing drugs again. No way. I just can’t believe it. I hurry to my commander's officer and knock on the door. “Enter.”

  “Good morning, sir.”

  “Good morning, Captain.”

  “Sir, I was wondering if I could head to lunch a few minutes early. I just got a call from home, and I need to go back to my room to check something personal.”

  I now have his attention. Some commanders couldn’t give a fuck less about our family life, but not him. “Is everything okay?”

  “I’m not sure, sir, but I don’t want to say anything just yet. I need to check a few things and touch base with my mom.”

  “Go. If you need me, let me know.”

  “Yes, sir.” I hurry out of the office and jog straight to my room. I open my laptop and turn it on. My leg is twitching while I wait for it to boot up. This makes me wish I had downloaded the dang app that the bank said I should use. I was too worried about hackers, so I ignored all they told me about what they do to keep it safe and stuck with just using the computer.

  It finally loads and when I log in to our account, what I see shocks me. Our savings account is down a couple of grand. “What the hell is she doing?” I whisper to myself.

  I grab my phone and text my mom.

  Jesse: Has she bought anything big for either of the kids?

  Mom: Not that I’ve seen.

  Fuck.

  “What’s wrong, Jesse?” Karen asks, snapping me out of my memory.

  “You know, Mom tried to warn me, but I didn’t believe her at first. I was angry with her for accusing Della of relapsing.” I look down at her. “When I realized she was right, I couldn’t apologize enough.”

  “It’s understandable. No one wants to believe that the person they love is going through that. Look at me and how blind I was to Brian’s cheating. You just don’t want to believe it could happen in your relationship,” she says so sweetly.

  “I think that’s one of the reasons we get along so well. We understand what we’ve each been through.”

  “Yeah, well, unfortunately I’m still going through it with Brian, and I have a feeling now that he knows you’re Jason’s coach and my boyfriend it’s going to get worse.”

  “Sweetie, if you think Brian scares me, then you don’t know me very well and we need to start spending a lot more time together.”

  She laughs and rests her head on my shoulder. “I don’t have a problem spending more time with you especially if it’s time like we spent this morning, because that was pretty amazing.” That cute blush is coloring her cheeks.

  “Oh, I want much more of that kind of time together.” I give her a chaste kiss.

  The boys both crack up laughing. When we look over, they’re on the ground rolling around laughing hysterically. Karen watches them with a smile and then changes the subject. “How do you feel about cookouts?” she asks.

  “I told you, I love to grill.”

  “No, I mean with other people. We used to get together for cookouts during baseball season. The boys would play and the adults would hang out. It was fun, and it really brought them together as a team.”

  “I don’t see why not. At least while the weather is still nice.” I shrug. “If it starts to get too cold, we’ll have to figure something else out. My house is big, but I’m not sure I want that many kids running around the house.”

  “Yeah, I agree. That’s a lot.”

  “Let’s schedule something for opening weekend. That way we can at least be sure we celebrate that.”

  “That’s a great idea. I’ll set up an event in our Facebook group inviting the entire team, and we’ll see how many are interested. If it’s like baseball, only a small fraction of people will actually participate.”

  “If that’s the case, then we can do it in the house, but to have the entire team in the house would be a lot. There are almost thirty kids on the team.”

  She chuckles. “I’ll bet you that no more than eight kids will come.”

  “Did you just say bet?” I need to see what I can do with this. I love a good bet.

  “I did,” she says with confidence.

  “You’re on. If more than eight kids say they’re coming, what do I get?”

  “What do you want?”

  “Here’s how this will go down. You set up the event and if more than eight RSVP that they’re coming then you start spending more nights at my place.”

  Her jaw drops. “What do I get if I’m right?”

  “What do you want?”

  She narrows her eyes at me. “I’m not sure yet, but I’ll agree to your demand if you’ll agree I get to decide what I want later.” />
  I chuckle. “Fair enough.”

  “Kiss on it,” she demands.

  Now I’m really laughing. “Umm... usually you shake.”

  “Yeah but you’re my man, and I love your lips pressed to mine.”

  “That I can agree with.” She kisses me sweetly, and we go back to enjoying the nice afternoon.

  What an amazing weekend we had at Jesse’s house. We didn’t end up leaving there until after dinner on Sunday. Jason wanted to stay longer, but I needed to get home and get things ready for work, football, and school this week. Yesterday, Jason was a bit tired when he got out of school. He did his homework for the week, ate dinner, showered and then relaxed in bed. He was so tired he fell asleep around eight-fifteen, but woke up in a much better place this morning. Now he’s excited for football tonight.

  “Jason, are you ready?” I call into the other room. We have plans to picnic with Jesse and his family at the field, and I don’t want to be late.

  “Yes.” He comes running into the room with his black bag over his shoulder. We walk out the door. The drive to the field is a quiet one and I get lucky, there’s no traffic so we get there in plenty of time. I grab a blanket from the trunk, and Jason grabs his bag. We’re the first ones from our team to arrive. I set up my blanket and get settled on the ground. I love sitting in the grass, this is so relaxing.

  Jason sets up his helmet and water bottle and starts throwing his ball in the air and catching it. “Throw the ball with me, Mom.”

  “Okay.” I jump up and catch the ball he throws at me.

  I toss it back, and he makes the catch. “Come a little closer so I can warm up.” We throw the ball back and forth, each time putting a little more distance between us. I enjoy doing this because I’m not only getting exercise in, but I’m spending time with my son. I love doing this with him. This is what I wish Brian was doing, but he’s an ass.

  “Karen!” Grace’s little voice calls out. When I turn around she’s running down the hill, excited for cheer practice. Jesse, Josephine, and Gabe are following behind her. Jesse is carrying a cooler, Gabe is carrying a big black bag, and Josephine is carrying a blanket. I throw the ball one last time and then tell Jason to come eat. I hurry over to take the blanket from Josephine, setting it up next to mine so there’s enough room for all of us.

  Jesse helps his mom to the ground and then distributes paper plates. She takes some sandwiches out of the cooler. Each sandwich has a name on it. I think it’s incredibly cute and generous that she took the time to ask Jason what he likes so she could make everyone’s sandwich the way they wanted it. The boys quickly eat and then relax for the few minutes they have left before more of the team arrives. It is so helpful doing a picnic before practice because we get to enjoy the nice weather while we still have it, and there’s more time for a meal before they have to hit the field. Not to mention, we get to enjoy eating together.

  “How was your day?” Jesse asks me.

  “It was good. I got a lot done. How was yours?”

  “Busy. I did a walk through with one of my clients. We have some issues we need to rectify on their home, but I’ll get it taken care of.”

  “What do you mean, issues?”

  “Well, the painters got paint splatter on the floor. I already had it noted to have it cleaned, but they noticed it too, so I assured them it will be fixed,” he explains, laying back on his elbows.

  His mom chuckles. “I’ve heard so many crazy stories about his work since he’s been back. Some people have very valid complaints and others are simply being a pain in the ass,” Josephine tells me with laughter.

  Jesse rolls his eyes and is about to say more about his job when Trystan, Stella, and DJ come over. “Some of my clients are simply a challenge, but right now I have another challenge to face—coaching. I’ll see you after.” He kisses me on the head as Josephine gives a small smile. “Thanks, Mom.” He walks over to the practice area with Trystan and DJ.

  “Well, I guess I better get Grace to cheer. I’ll see you before we leave.” Josephine calls Grace over.

  “Thanks for dinner.”

  “You’re most welcome, dear,” she says as Grace skips over.

  Stella takes a seat on the blanket next to me. “I think it’s adorable that you all sit and have dinner here at the field.”

  I shrug. “It’s the only way for us to spend any time together, plus the boys have to eat so they can keep up their energy.”

  “Hey, ladies.” Misty joins us on the blanket. The boys are still horsing around but will be starting practice any minute now. It’s become the mom squad thing to gather on our blanket. Lori, Stacy, and Arien all join us for our nightly chat session. Emma, Blake’s wife, has started to join us as well. We’re in the middle of catching up on weekly chatter and I’m reminding them of the meeting tomorrow night when I hear my name. I look up to see Brian standing over us just as the whistle blows for Jesse to gather everyone.

  “I have to go be team mom. I’ll be back.” I hurry over to the huddle.

  “Karen, do you have any news?” Jesse asks.

  “Yes, we are getting uniforms tonight. When practice is done be sure you try on the jersey I will be handing out to your parents. We need to ensure they fit. They will also have pants and a belt. You can try the pants on at home. They are easier to swap if they don’t fit,” I notify them. When I’m done I turn to see Brian standing right behind me. I look back to see shock on Jason’s face. Jesse notices and turns his attention to me. “Guys, can you warm the boys up, please?”

  “Sure thing,” Blake says and tells the boys to line up.

  “Jesse, it’s good to see you, man.” Brian holds his hand out.

  Instead of shaking the offered hand he crosses his arms at his chest and says, “I wish I could say the same. What do you want?”

  “I want to help coach the team.” Brian drops his hand.

  “Sorry, man, but the spots are filled. As you can see, I have plenty of help.” He points to the three guys helping him warm up the team.

  “Yeah, but you know I know the game, and Jason is my son,” he sneers.

  “And Gabe is mine.” He steps up to Brian. “Don’t come here all jealous, pretending to care. You tossed a good woman and kid aside like they were a dirty shoe, and now that I’m around you’re all butt hurt.”

  Brian tenses and looks him in the eye, anger radiating from his body. “We were boys, and now you’re banging my leftovers.”

  Jesse’s fists ball, but I step between them before he can do anything. “Jesse, go coach the team. Clearly he doesn’t really want to be here if we are his ‘leftovers’”

  Jesse let’s out a slow, steady breath and says, “If you ever refer to your family as leftovers again…” he pauses. “Nothing will stop me from knocking you flat on your lousy no good for nothing ass. You had a good thing and now they’re mine, and I protect what’s mine.” He glances down at me. “I’ll see you after practice, beautiful.” He presses his lips to mine and jogs over to his team.

  “How dare you come here simply to cause problems. You left me. You dipped your nasty little cock in another woman while we were still married, and now you refer to me as a leftover!” My voice is getting loud, and I know I need to turn it down a notch. I exhale a deep breath. “Get the fuck out of here,” I demand, planting my hands on my hips.

  He looks me up and down like he wants to say something, but he bites his tongue and walks away. He looks back over his shoulder and says, “See you Friday,” With a cocky grin.

  I glance over to see Jason hard at it in practice. I’m proud of him. He didn’t let his father get to him. I walk over to join the ladies. Misty says, “I take it that was the ex.”

  “Yup.”

  “Jesse looked like he wanted to kill him,” Lori adds.

  “He does. He is livid that Brian treated us the way he did and now he shows up here demanding that he get to help coach, staking his claim to Jason.” We’re both furious. “Then he calls me his leftover
. I thought Jesse was going to murder him.”

  “What an ass,” Misty says.

  “Pretty much, but you know what? Jason is doing fine in practice and as long as he doesn’t affect him, I won’t let him affect me.” I spent far too much time dwelling on how I felt about what he did to us. I’m done. I won’t allow him to get to me anymore, especially now that I have Jesse.

  “Can I just switch gears here because I need to know if Sam’s the only one excited for the weigh-in and party this weekend?”

  “Oh no, it’s all Mason and DJ have been talking about. The coaches are working on an intro song for their home games, and they won’t reveal it until Saturday,” Stella says.

  “Yeah, Jesse has been listening to a lot of music trying to narrow it down, but I’m not sure they’ve fully decided yet.” I lean back on my hands to watch the boys practice.

  “Oh before I forget, Briggs wants to work chains for all our home games,” Misty says, typing away on her phone. “I’m glad he sent me a text to remind me.”

  “Cool. One of the other dads signed up too. Now I just need a Mandatory Play Requirement monitor, and volunteers for concessions and the gate.” I make a note on my clipboard.

  “What does the monitor do?” Misty asks.

  “They have to stand on the opposing team's sidelines and ensure they are playing all their players fairly. Each player is required to make a minimum of ten plays. We’ll have one parent on their side and they’ll have one on ours. Each team signs the sheet at the end of the game showing the number of plays each player made. Then the sheets are submitted to the league. It prevents a team from cheating.”

  “Let me know if no one signs up. I’ll march my sassy ass over to the other sideline and do it,” Misty says with laughter.

  “That’s nice of you, but Briggs is already volunteering for chains so you, my friend, do not need to do anymore.” I wink at her.

  “I’ll sign up to collect money at the gate,” Arien says.