Full Throttle

by Adriana Hunter

  “Don’t cover perfection, Aubrey. You’re beautiful when you’re asleep.”

  “Have you been watching me sleep?” Rolling onto her back, she stretched her arms over her head. She was rewarded by a long appreciative look from Caleb, his eyes moving over her body.

  “I have. For quite a while.” He reached out, caressing one breast. Aubrey drew in a sharp breath as he fondled her nipple, bringing it erect and hard.

  “And as much as I’d like to climb back in with you, it’s after ten-thirty. If you want your tattoo, we have to get going.”

  Aubrey pushed herself up on her elbows. “Yes!”

  Caleb sat back, his hand resting gently on her stomach. “You want a shower? Breakfast? I’m not the most experienced chef, but I can do breakfast.”

  “Yes, very much, to both.”

  He rose, pulling the sheet all the way off the end of the bed, leaving her completely uncovered. “The bathroom is down the hall. I put out some clean towels. The shampoo’s a bit on the masculine side so you might smell like a boy, but it works.”

  Aubrey slid off the bed, reaching up to put her arms around Caleb’s neck. “I’m sure I can manage.” The quick kiss she intended turned into a lingering one, and the effect she was having on him was quickly evident.

  He ran his hands through her hair and she pressed herself against him, her breasts crushed against his warm skin. The kiss deepened, his tongue playing in her mouth and she answered him, every cell in her body coming alive.

  When he broke away, his eyes were dark, his voice rough with passion. “I think we’re going to be late getting you that tattoo.”

  “There are worse things than being late.” She was already pulling him back to the bed. “And we can take a shower together to save time.”

  “I like how you think.” He was on top of her then and any other words she might have said were silenced by his mouth hard on hers.

  Later, dressed and drinking coffee in the kitchen, Caleb turned to her. “I have something to show you.”

  She slipped off the chair and followed him into a small room tucked away by the back door. The window overlooked the porch and the backyard, letting in soft midday light. It smelled of linseed oil and something she couldn’t identify.

  “Cloves.”

  “What?”

  “You’re wrinkling your nose. You’re smelling oil of cloves. I mix it with the paint, makes it smell better and not dry out so fast.”

  “Tricks of the trade?”

  He was standing by an easel that held a small canvas and she walked around to see what it was. Her eyes went wide.

  “Oh my God, Caleb. It’s me…when did you do this?”

  “Yesterday. After you left.” He grinned, shaking his head. “I couldn’t sleep after…well, after we got off the phone. So I started this.”

  Aubrey took a step closer, examining the painting. He’d caught her with a dreamy look, her face turned a little away from the viewer. She felt a flush creeping up her cheeks; she was most certainly nude.

  “That’s not what I look like.” She made a dismissive noise, turning away. He set his hand gently on her arm.

  “It’s what you look like to me. Beautiful, from head to toe, best viewed without anything to obstruct your beauty.”

  Her blush deepened and she turned back to the painting. She’d never imagined how she would look like to someone else, only how she saw herself. And all she ever saw were her flaws, the lank hair, her pale skin, too many curves in too many places.

  But here, she had to admit she was beautiful. Lush and languid, her skin glowing, her hair fanned out across the pillow, a million shades of rich brown.

  Caleb leaned close, his breath against her ear. His voice was low, barely audible.

  “All it takes is to see yourself through someone else’s eyes, someone who sees the real you.”

  ***

  Caleb parked the bike at the back of the shop and led Aubrey up the stairs. The lights were on, but the only people there were Cassandra, who was perched behind the counter and Aaron, one of the other artists. Aaron nodded as Caleb walked past. They’d made it by noon, but just barely.

  “Here it is. My home away from home.”

  Aubrey walked into his station, looking around the small space. “It’s almost as neat as your house.” She bent to look at the row of small paintings he had lined up on a low shelf, preliminary drawings for tattoos he hoped to do some day.

  “I thought you weren’t coming in till three.”

  Caleb looked up. Cass was standing outside his station, arms folded across her chest. Aubrey turned, smiling, but was greeted with a frown from Cass.

  “You don’t have any scheduled appointments.”

  “We just decided on this last night, so I’m going to get it done before my regular hours. You can write it in if you want, Cass.”

  “Last night?” She gave Aubrey a withering glance. “I see.” With that, she turned and flounced back to the front counter where she resumed her perch.

  “I think she’s got a crush on you, Caleb.” Aubrey lowered her voice.

  Caleb glanced at Cass, who was now studiously avoiding looking in their direction, and frowned.

  “I feel bad, but she’s too young. And I’ve never seen a successful work romance. I’m not about to alienate a co-worker, although I may already have.”

  Pulling out a chair, he gestured for Aubrey to take a seat. “You sit here. And rest your arm here.” He set a padded armrest next to the chair, adjusting it until her arm was where he wanted it.

  “Can you draw the notes? How they’d be arranged?” He handed Aubrey a piece of paper and a pencil and she drew the opening bars to the piece of music, handing the paper back to Caleb.

  “Let me make a drawing and we can get started.”

  Within minutes, using tracing paper, he had a drawing. He held it up for Aubrey to see.

  “It’s perfect, Caleb. Exactly how I see it in my mind’s eye.”

  He made a stencil, then he went about setting up the tools of his trade: the tattoo gun, the ink, various sized needles. Finally, he held her wrist and applied the stencil.

  “I never thought there’d be so much preparation for something so small.”

  Caleb glanced up, smiling. “Yeah, for some, it does take longer to get everything ready than to do the actual tattoo. But we’re ready to start. Are you excited?”

  The question was answered by the smile on Aubrey’s face. “You have no idea.”

  “I do. Your hand is shaking. Don’t be nervous.” He turned her hand over, kissing the back of it.

  “You’ll be fine.”

  For the next hour, Caleb meticulously tattooed the tiny music notes onto Aubrey’s skin. He was acutely aware of her every reaction, wincing when she drew a sharp breath, knowing it hurt. But she held still far better than he could have hoped for.

  Finally he sat back, turning off the tattoo machine and setting it aside. He gently wiped her wrist with a damp paper towel, wiping away the excess ink.

  “It’s a little swollen and red, which is normal. You have really nice skin for tattooing; it takes ink really well. Here, take a look.”

  “It wasn’t so bad…really.” Aubrey looked down at her wrist, turning it this way and that, silent far too long for Caleb’s comfort.

  “Well? Is it okay?” He knew it was far too late to do anything about it, and he suddenly regretted even suggesting the idea.

  But then Aubrey looked up and he saw her smile. “It’s perfect. Really. I feel powerful and different and happy…and it’s amazing.” She threw her arms around him, hugging him.

  “Ow…but it does hurt.” She pulled away, laughing, holding her hand up. “How long before it stops?”

  Caleb reached for a sterile wrap and tape, gently applying it to her wrist. “A couple of days. It’ll feel like a sunburn for the most part. And then it’ll itch like nuts as it’s healing. But probably not until later next week.”

  “By Monday? What’ll
it be like then?” She flexed her wrist, looking at the green wrapping.

  “It’ll look okay. To someone who’s not familiar with tattoos, they may not realize it’s new.”

  “Everyone will know simply because it’s me.”

  “True.” Caleb looked at the clock. “I have a client in about an hour. What do you want to do?”

  Aubrey frowned. “As much as I hate to say this, I do need to go home. I have one last practice session tomorrow and Paul is scheduled at the same time. He’s been leaving messages on my phone almost non-stop. I think he’s afraid I’ve gone off the deep end. He’s resorted to calling my mother. I’m sure they’re having a discussion about me as we speak.”

  “Then I’ll take you home. Let me just clean up.”

  An hour later, after a long kiss on the sidewalk in front of her apartment building, Caleb was back at his station, working on his next client. But his mind was on Aubrey, knowing he wouldn’t see her until sometime Monday evening.

  The only thing he could think of to do was to throw himself into his work. Weekends had always flown by, but he had the distinct feeling this one was going to last far too long.

  Chapter Seven

  Aubrey had managed to make it through a tense Saturday dinner with her parents and her practice session without having the tattoo noticed. It wasn’t something she wanted to hide, but the less stress she was under at the moment, the better.

  On Monday morning she was awake at dawn, unable to sleep. While she’d talked to Caleb several times for as long as either of them could spare, she missed him desperately, missed his touch on her skin. Missed making love.

  But she had an audition in four hours and she was going to go and do what she’d worked so hard for so many years to accomplish.

  Auditions were being held at the university theater, a gracious building that was home to the school’s theater company. The stage was set up for individuals to play, with the audition committee occupying the front row. The auditions were supposed to be sealed, but for those who knew the building, sneaking into the balcony wasn’t out of the question.

  The school had arranged for warm-up rooms and Aubrey had sequestered herself away from Paul, who had dogged her from the moment he saw her. And he’d seen the tattoo, peeking from the sleeves of her black blouse.

  “What the hell? Are you crazy? You can’t be serious…”

  “Paul. I’m very serious. And I have to warm up. So do you.”

  “It’s that guy…that motorcycle guy. You’re suddenly infatuated with him, blowing off everyone else. I’m surprised you’re even here today and not off with him doing whatever.”

  Aubrey was dumbfounded. She was used to an insecure Paul, but a petulant, jealous Paul was unbearable. Without another word, she shut herself in her practice room and locked the door.

  Shortly before her appointed time, a proctor led her to the stage door where she waited for the door to open. At precisely nine, the proctor opened the door and Aubrey stepped through. The man closed the door behind her.

  ***

  Caleb had no idea what to expect, wasn’t even sure if he’d be allowed anywhere near Aubrey during the auditions. But he’d found a place where he could wait for her and he paced nervously, trying to watch the door where someone had told him she’d probably emerge from. It was well past nine but again, he had no idea how long these things took. He was on the verge of asking for information again when the door opened and Aubrey stepped out, looking tense and worried.

  He walked toward her and she turned. For an instant he thought she didn’t see him, but suddenly she relaxed, the tension leaving her face.

  “Caleb! How did you…” She took several quick steps, almost colliding with him in her rush.

  “I thought you might like a cheering section, although I suspect this isn’t the kind of event where anyone cheers. Probably a good thing I wasn’t allowed inside.”

  “I wouldn’t have cared, but if I saw you, I would have been even more nervous.”

  He wrapped one arm around her, pulling her against him, careful to avoid the delicate looking violin she carried.

  “Here, let’s go sit in one of the practice rooms. It’s chaotic but there are less people walking back and forth.”

  She led him through a nondescript door and down a short, cinder-block hallway painted an ugly shade of green. The door she opened showed a scene of what he assumed was controlled chaos, with people dressed in black hurrying between rooms, the muffled sounds of horns, pianos, and other instruments coming from various places. Aubrey led him to a corner of the room, pulled out two chairs, and indicated he should sit.

  “I’ll be right back.” She darted through the throng, returning without her violin.

  “What now? Do you wait to find out how you did?”

  “I was…they call our numbers later. But if you want, we can go and come back.”

  Caleb shook his head. “You do whatever you need to and I’ll follow along. This is your day and I don’t want to throw it out of whack.”

  They sat in the practice room then walked the halls, sometimes talking, but mostly quiet. Caleb held her hand and that made the waiting easier.

  They were coming back through the lobby when an electric rush of excitement ran through the milling crowd. Someone shouted that they were starting the call. Caleb squeezed her hand and then let her go as she moved toward the end of the lobby.

  Time stood still as she waited. And then she heard it, her number. She’d done it, she was in.

  Numbly, she turned and saw Caleb, standing at the back of the crowd. He was looking at something else, not her, and she paused, taking in his handsome face, the black hair, the strong arms. The man she thought, just maybe, she was falling in love with. The man she’d now have to leave.

  Taking a deep breath, she forced a smile onto her face and walked toward him. He saw her and smiled, but then grew serious, brows drawing together.

  “Aubrey? Good news or bad? I can’t tell…you don’t look alright.”

  Aubrey took one more step and her smile faded. “I got it.” Her voice was barely a whisper.

  Caleb’s eyebrows shot up and he broke into a grin. “That’s great! Congratulations!” He pulled her against him, his arms holding her tight.

  And she burst into tears.

  ***

  “It’s just…I’ll be leaving in two weeks.”

  Caleb had pulled Aubrey against him, confused, not connecting what she was saying with the reality of her words. And then it hit him; she’d be leaving - leaving him.

  He’d pushed her away, holding her by the shoulders, looking down at her. “Aubrey, yeah, but…this is what you wanted, right? What you’ve been working for?”

  She’d been crying so hard, he had taken her outside. They sat on the school steps, not talking. She’d then asked if he could take her home.

  “Home? Your parents’ house? Or your apartment?” He maneuvered the bike so it faced the street, motioning for her to climb on. She hiked up her long skirt and mounted the bike behind him.

  “Neither. Your house. I want to go home with you.”

  So he’d taken her back to his house, leaving her car at the university. Once there, he’d gotten her a clean t-shirt and shorts, and she’d changed out of the severe black blouse and skirt she’d worn for the audition. With her hair combed out and her makeup washed off, she sat on his couch, legs tucked beneath her, looking small and vulnerable.

  He sat down beside her and she curled up against him.

  “You knew this was what would happen if you got it, right, Aubrey?” He wanted to be gentle with her, not upset her. But he wanted her to talk through whatever was going on and not shut him out.

  She nodded. “I did. But until it happened, until I’d gotten it, I guess it really didn’t hit me. I hadn’t thought about the audition and you at the same time.” She looked up at him, tears welling up in her eyes.

  “I don’t think I’d have gone if I’d thought this through.”
r />   “Aubrey, no, you can’t say that. Seriously. Even if you’ve been pushed toward this…now isn’t the time to give it all up.”

  She rested her head on his shoulder again and they sat quietly for a long time. He stroked her hair and tried not to think too much about what had just happened. She was right; it hurt. It hurt just thinking about it.

  “Caleb…” Her voice was soft, sad, and it hurt to hear the pain.

  “I’m here.”

  “Make love to me. Please?”

  He tilted her face to his. “Anytime…”

  Solemnly she rose, still holding his hand, and he led her upstairs. The afternoon light was mellow, long rays slanting through the window.

  They were silent as Caleb pulled the oversized shirt over Aubrey’s head then tugged the shorts down over her hips. She hadn’t bothered with a bra or panties and she stood naked next to his bed. He pulled her against him, his mouth finding hers, tasting the salt of her tears.

  He laid her on the bed and she watched as he took off his shirt and jeans before he lay down beside her.

  “Come here.” He pulled her against him and he held her while she cried silently for a moment. His heart hurt listening to her. Finally, she pulled away to look up at him.

  “I’m sorry…”

  “Shhh. It’s okay. It’s been an emotional day for you…hell, it’s been an emotional week. Just let it go for now, for a little bit. We can talk about it later…”

  “Caleb…”

  “I’m here. Always.”

  “I love you.” Her voice was small but clear and steady with no hint of tears.

  He thought his heart would burst. “I love you too, Aubrey.” His voice was far from steady, suddenly choked with emotion. She smiled at him, nodding her head.

  “I thought so.”

  He kissed her then and she returned his kiss, her arms sliding around his body. Their lovemaking was gentle, and Caleb treated Aubrey as if she was fragile porcelain. Every movement he made was slow and he was conscious of every breath she took, every sound she made, every nuanced change in her movements. He wanted this to be as perfect for her as it could be.