Lean On Me

by Tori Scott

  She led him into the living room and sat on a wing chair, her father taking a seat on the couch across from her. After a moment of awkward silence, he asked, "How's Melanie?"

  "She's fine. Her cast comes off next week if her x-rays look good, then she'll go to physical therapy for a week or two to strengthen the muscles. She's been chomping at the bit to get out and play. She has a walking cast now, so at least she can get around some on her own. She drives Jason crazy trying to keep up with her."

  Jack looked puzzled. "Who's Jason?"

  "The teenager next door. He helps take care of Mel while I'm at work."

  "You can't be serious. You're letting that irresponsible teenager take care of her?" His face reddened with anger and his fists clenched. "What kind of mother are you?"

  "A darned good one, Jack," Lillian said from the doorway where she stood wiping her hands on a cup towel. "The best I've ever seen, as a matter of fact, except maybe my own mother." She pushed away from the door and came to sit on the arm of Sandy's chair.

  Sandy was relieved her mother had come to her rescue once again. Her dad had a way of making her feel like she was eight years old and about to be punished for some minor infraction. It wasn't a feeling she wanted to repeat. Her mother's praise lifted her spirits at a time when she really needed the support. It also gave her the courage to ask her father a question she'd wanted to ask him for a very long time.

  "Daddy, do you love us, Mother and me? I mean really love us? I've always wondered about that."

  Her father looked like she'd struck him. He collapsed against the back of the couch, his mouth open and eyes wide.

  "How can you ask me that? I've worked hard all my life to give you everything you needed, and as much of what you wanted as I could manage. There were many years that I worked a second job outside of the church when you kids needed braces or your mother wanted new furniture. What more did you want me to do?"

  "I don't know. Spend time with us, act like you were glad we were there when you came home instead of going straight to your study and closing the door. Talk to us. It seemed like the only time you said anything to us was when you were issuing an order or when we'd done something wrong."

  "You really felt like that? Like I didn't love you or want to spend time with you?"

  Sandy looked at her lap and nodded.

  Jack shook his head slowly. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that to you. I guess I'm more like my father than I ever wanted to be. Your mother tried to tell me, but I didn't believe her."

  In the kitchen, Hunter eavesdropped at the door while Melanie and Jason sat at the kitchen table eating chocolate cake.

  "Dad? What's going on out there?" Jason asked.

  Hunter eased the door closed and walked to the table before he answered. "Sandy and her father are having a heart-to-heart talk that's long overdue." He took a rag from the drawer next to the sink and wet it under the faucet to wash Melanie's chocolate-covered face and hands. "Would you do me a favor, Jason?"

  "Sure. What do you want me to do?"

  "Would you take Melanie out to the back yard and keep her occupied for a while? I think there's going to be a lot of emotional conversation taking place that she doesn't need to hear."

  "Okay. You want to go outside Melanie?" he asked.

  "Yeah. Can you push me in the swing?"

  "I don't think I'd better do that yet with the cast still on your leg. But we'll find something to do."

  Once the children were outside, Hunter returned to the door to listen.

  "I've always wondered why you were so much harder on me than you were on Ryan and Denise," Sandy was saying to her father. "I couldn't please you, no matter what I did."

  Jack sighed and rubbed his forehead with one wrinkled hand. Another parent growing older, Sandy thought. She'd never given much consideration to the fact that her parents wouldn't be around forever. The idea made her cringe.

  "When you were little, I could see signs that you were going to be the strong-willed one of the bunch. I clamped down hard, hoping to keep you from making the same mistakes I saw in so many of the young people back then. I didn't want to see you hurt."

  He took a deep breath and raised his head to look her in the eye. "But if you'll let me, I'll apologize now. I'm sorry. For hurting you, for not believing in you. Can you forgive me?"

  Sandy cried out and jumped from her chair, dropping to the floor in front of her father. She laid her head on his knees and cried as he patted her head. "I'm sorry, too, Daddy. I was so full of anger that I let a lot of it spill over onto you. I love you. Will you forgive me, too?"

  "I love you, sweetheart," he said gruffly, his voice rusty like the words so rarely said grated against his throat. "Of course I forgive you."

  Lillian stood behind the chair Sandy had abandoned and watched her husband and daughter as they hugged, her own eyes misty. She felt an arm slip through hers and turned to find Hunter offering her one of her lace hankies. She dabbed at her eyes.

  Jack gave Sandy a hug and passed her off to Hunter, then went to stand before Lillian.

  Looking uncomfortable with all the emotion that had been displayed, he cleared his throat and said, "Lillian, I think I've apologized more in the last ten minutes than I have in my entire life, but I have at least one more to go. Your leaving shook me more than I could have imagined. I've had nearly a month to look back over the last thirty years to see where I went wrong. What I saw wasn't pretty, and it made me ashamed of myself. I turned out just like Papa and treated you the same way he did Mama. Took you and your love for granted, like it was my due rather than a precious gift."

  "Jack," Lillian began.

  "No, let me finish while I still have the nerve. This isn't easy for me. But I want you to know I love you. I have from the day we met, and I've never stopped. I'll love you until the day they put me in the ground. I'm sorry I hurt you, sorry I made you feel like you had to leave me. Please believe me when I tell you it will never happen again."

  Lillian looked almost young again, Sandy thought, as her eyes lit up and a radiant smile creased her face. Her mother embraced her father, who patted her back as if not sure what to do with his hands. Sandy realized it had been a long time since she'd seen her parents touch in more than a casual way.

  "I know you love me. I just let myself be blinded by jealousy when I saw that woman in your arms. I wanted to be the one you held, and it had been so long."

  Jack pulled back and looked at her, puzzlement clear on his face. "What woman in my arms? What on earth are you talking about?"

  "Betty Gillespie. The day I came to your office to tell you about Melanie's accident. Only, when I opened the door, you were holding her and I didn't think--I just left."

  "Well I'll be. That's what started all this? That woman was holding me, not the other way around, and if you'd stuck around a few more seconds you'd have seen me push her away and tell her to get hold of herself. Fool woman divorced her husband, then wanted him back. When he wouldn't agree, she came whining to me, throwing herself at me and crying all over my shirt. I've always tried to be compassionate, but you know I never physically comfort the female parishioners."

  "I know dear, that's why it was such a shock. I'm sorry for not believing in you. I love you, Jack, no matter what."

  Sandy sniffed and Hunter pulled her tighter against him as he wrapped both arms around her from behind and rested his chin on the top of her head. She turned in his arms and whispered, "Thank you."

  "What for? I didn't do anything."

  "Yes, you did. You were here for me, and you gave me someone to lean on. You're a very special man, Hunter."

  He hugged her tightly and dropped a soft, quick kiss on her lips. "No, you're the one who's special. I don't know if I could have forgiven that easily if I'd been in your shoes."

  Sandy shrugged her shoulders. "I realized earlier tonight that my parents are getting older. Who knows how much more time I'll have with them? I couldn't let old hurts stand in the way of being
with them, and of Melanie having a chance to know her grandparents. It's easier to forgive him than it is to hold on to the pain."

  Her father cleared his throat and brought them back to an awareness of the others in the room. Sandy turned back around to face her parents. "So," she said, "is everything okay?"

  Lillian smiled and hooked her arm through Jack's. "I think we're all going to be just fine."

  "Are you going to stay in town tonight, Dad? You can stay here if you'd like."

  Jack patted Lillian's hand and said, "Your mother's going to call and see if her patient's daughter can spend the night with her tonight. If she can, we're going to get a hotel room. We have some talking left to do, and I'd like to come back tomorrow to see my granddaughter, if that's all right with you."

  Sandy went to her parents and gave them each a hug, saying,

  "That's perfect. It's time you got to know Melanie again," she told her father. "She's changed so much since you last saw her. Let me warn you, though, she'll take full advantage of your attention and try to wrap you around her little finger."

  Jack chuckled. "She can wrap all she wants, as long as I get to spend some time with her."

  "You will, Dad," Sandy assured him. "All the time you want."

  After Lillian and Jack left, Hunter pulled Sandy back into his arms. "Feel better now?"

  She nodded her head against his chest, too tired and emotionally drained to speak. If she could just stay like this for the rest of her life, she'd be happy.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  In the kitchen, Jason turned away from the door and put his finger over his mouth, urging Melanie to be silent. He tiptoed over to where she sat and whispered, "Let's go back outside where we can talk. But you have to be real quiet. Understand?"

  Melanie bobbed her head, blonde curls bouncing, and lifted her arms for Jason to pick her up. He carefully placed one arm under her knees and one around her back, lifting her into his arms. She wrapped her little arms around his neck and snuggled her head against his neck. A lump formed in his throat at her trusting gesture.

  Quietly, so as not to disturb his dad and Sandy, he crept across the kitchen to the back door, eased it open, and slipped outside. He gently pulled it closed behind him, then carried Melanie through the thick green grass into the shade of an old oak tree. He carefully placed her on the ground, supporting her cast until she was settled.

  "Why did we come back out here?" Melanie whispered.

  "So my dad and your mom could be alone. And you don't have to be quiet now. They can't hear us out here."

  "Okay," she said a little louder. "Why do they want to be alone? I get scared when I'm all by myself."

  "Because they're grown-ups. And grown-ups need their privacy."

  "What's priba-pwiva-..."

  "Privacy. It means time by yourself with no one watching you."

  "Oh. Like when Mommy takes a bath and doesn't want me to let anyone in the house."

  Jason laughed and shook his head. "Not exactly, but close enough." He leaned his head back against the tree. "Do you ever wish you had a dad?" he asked.

  "I had a daddy once, but now he's in heaven. At least, I think that's where he is. I heard Mrs. Magee say he was where he deserbed to be. Does that mean he's in heaven?"

  "Deserved, not deserbed. And yeah, I guess so. I don't know much about that kind of stuff. But I meant do you wish you had a new dad, now that your old one is gone?"

  Melanie smoothed the front of her pink shirt with one tiny hand. She looked up at Jason with big brown eyes. "Sometimes. I like Jenny's dad. He takes us to get ice cream and to play at the park. He fixes our toys when we break them, and he likes to give piggy-back rides. I'd like a daddy like that."

  Jason bent his knees and planted his feet firmly on the ground. He stretched his arms out and rested his elbows on his knees. "Do you like my dad?"

  "Sure. He's nice. And he makes my mommy smile. Why? Don't you like him?"

  "Most of the time. Sometimes he makes me mad, but most of the time he's okay. I was wondering…what would you think if my dad became your dad? Would you be okay with that?"

  Melanie scrunched her face up and looked at Jason. "How can he be my dad if he's your dad? Do you want to give him away? Who would be your dad then?" She scratched her leg under the rim of the cast. "I don't think you can give dads away."

  "No, squirt, I don't mean I'd give him to you, exactly. I mean, like, if your mom married my dad. Then he'd be your dad, too." His voice dropped to almost a whisper. "And your mom would be my mom."

  Melanie's voice raised to a high-pitch squeal. "You mean like when we were playing pretend family, only for real? Would you be my for-real brother? Wait till I tell Jenny!"

  Jason covered her mouth with his hand. "Sh-h-h. You can't tell anyone yet, 'cause they haven't decided to get married. I just said 'what if.' Would it be okay with you?"

  She nodded vigorously. "Yeah. I'd like that."

  "Okay, then you and I need to try to help them along. You tell your mom how much you like my dad, and I'll tell my dad how great your mom is. But you have to keep this a secret. No telling your mom we talked about it. Deal?"

  He stuck his hand out toward her, and she placed her hand in his. "Deal," she said as they shook on it.

  Sandy and Hunter found them there a few minutes later, their heads close together as they talked. Hunter slid his arm around Sandy and pulled her close as they stood on the back porch and watched their children. "They look like they're talking about something important," he said.

  "Yeah, but to a four-year-old even ice cream is important. Who knows what they're cooking up now. Maybe we'd better break in before they plan to raid the freezer."

  "Nah, let's just leave them alone. We can sneak back inside and lock your bedroom door, then we can…"

  Sandy pretended to consider the idea, then shook her head. "No, we can't."

  "Well, you can't blame a guy for trying, can you?"

  Hunter pulled her back into the house, out of the kids' view, and kissed her soundly. When he finally let her up for air, she said, "I don't suppose you have an instant baby-sitter up your sleeve, do you?"

  Hunter pulled his sleeves back and turned his hands over, then back. "Nope. I'm fresh out. But I tell you what. Let's plan a weekend away. We'll go to a bed and breakfast down near Austin. We won't need the breakfast, but the bed will come in handy," he told her with a wicked grin.

  Sandy groaned. "Oh, don't tempt me with something I can't have. There's no way I could leave Melanie now, with her cast due to come off next week. Who could I trust to keep her?"

  "Well, your mom's job ends this week, doesn't it?"

  Sandy nodded, a thoughtful look on her expressive face.

  Since she seemed to be considering the idea, he continued. "And it looks like she'll be going home with your dad, right? And since your dad wants to spend time with Melanie, I thought maybe they'd like to have her come visit them for a weekend."

  "That's a possibility. What about Jason?"

  "Liz's parents will take him anytime I need them to. That won't be a problem."

  "And what do we tell the kids?

  "We'll think of something. So, are we on?"

  "Not for the next three weekends, but maybe a month from now? And I have a better idea of where we can go. My parents own a fishing cabin on the Neches river. It's miles from anywhere; no neighbors, no tourists. It would be just you and me."

  Hunter sighed and lowered his forehead to hers. "That sounds like heaven, but I'm not sure I can wait that long. There's no way to make it sooner?"

  "Nope. Afraid not. But I've heard that patience is good for the soul. The wait will do wonders for yours."

  "I think you've mixed your metaphors, but I've heard one that says 'Good things come to those that wait,' so I guess I can look forward to lots of good things. Right?"

  "Oh, you can count on it, Hunter."

  ***

  The following Wednesday Melanie's cast came off. Sandy and Melanie bot
h stared at the shrunken limb in morbid fascination. The surgical scar was small, just as the doctor had said it would be, but it stood out on the bone-white skin. Melanie looked at the doctor and said, "Yucky!"

  "It may look yucky now, but it'll be back to normal in no time," the doctor told her. "You just need to be careful for the next couple of weeks. Your muscles aren't very strong right now. You don't want to fall and hurt it again."

  "She'll be very careful," Sandy assured him. "I don't want anything like this to ever happen again."

  "You can't protect them all of the time, just make sure that you limit the exposure to potential harm. Don't worry about her too much. Kids are amazingly resilient. Now, she'll go to physical therapy three times a week for the next two weeks, then she can pretty much do anything she did before the accident."

  "Yippee!" Melanie cried. "I can ride my tricycle."

  "No, you can't," Sandy told her. "Remember, we talked about that."

  "Sure she can," the doctor said. "There's no reason she can't be back on it in two weeks. She should be almost fully recovered by then."

  "You don't understand," Sandy told him. "I'm not letting her back on a tricycle. They're too dangerous."

  "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…"

  "That's all right. We'll work it out."

  "Well," the doctor said with a too-bright smile. "Here's your prescription and instructions for physical therapy. Just set up an appointment with Dr. Mendelsohn in three weeks. Nice to meet you, Melanie." With that, he was gone.

  It's obvious he doesn't agree with me, Sandy thought, but that doesn't matter. She's my daughter and I have to do what I think is right. I'm not going to compromise on this. No more tricycles!

  ***

  Melanie became nearly impossible for Sandy to handle when Jason wasn't around. She was bored, she was tired of being told to be careful, and Sandy was at the end of her rope. Somehow Jason managed to keep the child entertained, filling her head with who knew what kind of stories. Whenever Sandy asked Melanie what she and Jason talked about, Melanie told her it was a secret. There was something going on between the two kids, but Sandy couldn't get a word out of Melanie.