Scarred by Love

by C. A. Harms

  Zander turned around looking back toward the group of guys waiting. “Yeah, I guess I’ll take off.” He spun around kissing me one last time. “I love you baby.”

  “I love you, have a good time.”

  Zander winked and walked toward the SUV. Once all the guys were loaded up they slowly backed out and drove away.

  A buzz of my phone inside my car had a smile spreading across my face. I knew it was him.

  I miss you already.

  I miss you

  Remember when you go out tonight…you’re mine. Remind every guy that attempts to talk to you of that.

  Slow down Z you have nothing to worry about. Love you.

  I’ll call you later. I am already being harassed by Max about texting you so soon after leaving you.

  Tell Max I said to butt out and mind his own business.

  I think I’ll just put my phone away instead. Love you baby.

  Fine…love you too

  Chapter Forty-Seven

  ~Riley~

  “Wow this place is packed. I had no idea there was a band tonight.” Kate hollered over the loud music. “Let’s find Bree and the other girls.”

  I nodded my head and she grabbed my hand pulling me along behind her. We found them at a tall table near the bar. Bree had brought a friend of hers from work and her roommate.

  “Hey you,” she leaned forward hugging me. “This is my roommate Carrie and my friend from work, Trina.” The girl she introduced as Trina kept watching me but smiled. Without saying a word she picked up her drink taking a long swig. She excused herself to get another and I wrinkled up my eyebrows in question. Bree shrugged, “I have no idea what that was about.”

  I made the decision to ignore that girl for the rest of the night.

  After two hours of drinking and dancing we were laughing at anything and everything. Little Miss Bitchy was still making the choice to act like she had a stick up her ass and she was really beginning to get on my nerves. My phone vibrated on the table and Bree picked it up.

  “Aw…Zander is so sweet, look he is already calling you.”

  I smiled and grabbed my phone quickly, “Hi.”

  “Hey baby, damn that’s loud. Where are you?”

  “Bree drug us all to a place called Richard’s. They have a band tonight so it’s really busy.”

  I could hear Carson in the back ground asking Zander where we were and what Kate was doing. “Tell him he can call her and find out for himself.”

  Zander said something to Carson and I could no longer hear him. “So are you having a good time? Who all went with you?”

  “Bree met us with a few friends. It is fun, although Bree’s coworker came and she’s kind of a bitch. I don’t know who the hell she is but she acts like I offended her somehow.”

  “Tell her to fuck off.”

  I laughed, “I’ve thought about telling her a few things actually but chose to bite my tongue instead. Kate and I have been silently calling her “Trina the Troll”, it’s keeping us entertained.”

  Zander was silent for a few minutes. “Hey are you there?”

  “Um yeah, I’m here baby.” I waited for him to continue. “So her name is Trina?”

  “Yes.”

  “Do you know her last name?”

  What the hell was wrong with him? “Nope, never thought to ask her in between all the glaring and bitchy comments. “

  “Ry, does she have coal black hair and a mole below her right eye?”

  My stomach immediately sank and I looked over my shoulder to the table behind me. She was staring directly at me. I knew I wasn’t gonna like what Zander was about to say.

  “Yeah, why?”

  “Riley, I dated Trina for a few months before I met you.” I was silent while he explained. “It wasn’t anything serious. We just hung out and stuff.”

  “You slept with her?”

  When he didn’t answer I squeezed my eyes shut tightly.

  “Riley, it was before we met.”

  I knew I couldn’t be mad at him but I hated the thought of her hands on him. “Hey um, I gotta go. Kate’s ready to dance and you know how Kate is. She’ll drag me phone in hand, if I don’t go willingly.”

  “Baby, don’t be upset.”

  “I’m not Zander; I just need to let it soak in. Get back to the guys. We’ll talk tomorrow, goodnight.”

  I hung up before he could argue. A text came through shortly after.

  I love you Riley

  It was me that drug Kate to the dance floor. I filled her in on the conversation with Zander. Her nose scrunched up. “Well at least he redeemed himself by going after you. That girl is a nasty bitch.”

  Bree joined us on the dance floor and I couldn’t resist telling her what Zander told me. She apologized for bringing her and felt horrible. We laughed it off and continued dancing until we all needed another drink.

  “Hey Ry, isn’t that Beth?”

  I looked over to where Kate was pointing and sure enough Beth sat at a table by herself. Her head was hung low and she had empty shot glasses scattered in front of her. “Yeah, that’s her.”

  “She looks fuckin’ wasted.”

  I nodded my head without speaking, as I watched her. My heart sank at the site of her for more than one reason. I knew what not having Zander in your life could do to you and I felt horrible that she was alone in this state.

  Kate grabbed my arm as a started to walk in Beth’s direction. “Ry, what are you doing? I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  “I just want to talk to her. Just to make sure she has a ride home.”

  I made my way slowly across the bar. She looked up from the table just as I reached her.

  Beth began slurring heavily. “Well isn’t this great…Riley’s here. The perfect, dreamy Riley.”

  I let her continue as I looked around at the number of empty glasses in front of her.

  “You mean Z let you go out without him. He trusts you that much huh? Well good for you Princess, you got it all now don’t ya.”

  “Beth, do you have a ride home?”

  She tried to stand up from the table but only wobbled and I reached out grabbing her elbow. I helped her back into the chair. Once she was seated she jerked her arm away. “Let go, I don’t fuckin’ need you to rescue me. I’m fine. Go back to your friends.” She looked over my shoulder and laughed. “Even though I gotta say I’m surprised to see you out with Trina the skank. I mean she was the bitch that spent three month’s fucking your prince charming before you.”

  I swallowed back the bile that her comment caused to rise into my throat. “I’m not hanging with her. I just found out about her and Zander tonight. I agree though she is a skanky troll bitch.”

  “Wow Riley, I had no idea you had it in ya. I figured you would be her best friend just because you don’t want anyone to dislike you.”

  “There are a lot of things that you don’t know about me Beth. You always assumed that you knew me, but you never gave me a chance and you know it. I know that you miss Zander.” Her eyes connected with mine and they held unshed tears as she bit her lower lips. “I know he misses you too Beth. I also know that it would really hurt him if something bad happened to you.” She rubbed her forehead and her eyes flickered to mine once more.

  “I screwed everything up Riley. I lost my best friend because I was drunk and did things I never would have done sober. I missed him because you guys were always together. I know I made it hard for all of us. I just never had to share Zander with anyone before you. Even when he dated that skank over there,” She pointed toward Trina and I laughed. “She was just a pass time. He never cared about her like he does you. He loves you Riley…like really loves you.”

  “He loves you to Beth. You’re his family and I know that not having you in his life has been really hard. He tries to hide it. He tries to pretend that he’s okay with how things are but I know differently. I can see it in his eyes.”

  The tears finally escaped and ran down her cheeks. “Fuc
k, now I look like such a damn girl.”

  I laughed at her, “You are a girl, Beth. You’re a tough fun girl that also happens to be my boyfriend’s best friend. Why don’t you let me get you out of here?”

  She nodded her head and I motioned for Kate. She came up next to me and watched Beth closely.

  “Kate, let’s get Beth outta here. She’s gonna come home with us tonight.” Kate’s eyes shot up in shock and I smiled.

  “Don’t worry Barbie, I ain’t gonna kill ya in your sleep.”

  I laughed at Beth when I heard Kate grunt.

  “You see the thing is Beth you won’t be able to get up off the couch because I have handcuffs and I’m not taking any chances. Your ass is gonna be anchored to the springs.”

  I let Beth put her arm over my shoulder as I held her steady. “Fuckin’ hell Barbie, you aren’t getting anywhere near me with your kinky sex toys. I don’t know where those fuckers have been in the past.”

  “Where are you guys going?” Bree made her way over to us followed by Carrie and Trina.

  “We’re gonna take off.” Kate told Bree as I started to guide Beth toward the exit. Kate took her other arm and helped support her weight.

  “I’m surprised Zander hasn’t shown up to rescue her. Riley doesn’t it bother you that your boyfriend always puts her first. Hell, he’s probably fucking her on the side.”

  I allowed Kate to take Beth and I took a few steps toward ‘The Troll Bitch’. “Listen I don’t know what your fuckin’ problem is but obviously it’s something you need to resolve. It isn’t my fault that Zander found something better and dropped you on your ass. Get over it skank; you were just a piece of ass, and not a very good one if he walked away from it. Move on, grow the fuck up and walk away with a little dignity.”

  I walked away from her shocked expression and had to laugh. I guess Beth wasn’t the only one who thought I didn’t have the balls to stand up for myself.

  Chapter Forty-Eight

  ~Riley~

  “How are you feeling?”

  I stood next to the couch as Beth threw her arm over her eyes and groaned. “Like fuckin’ death or at least how I would imagine death to be.” I laughed and offered her coffee. She accepted while pulling herself up from the couch.

  “Damn, I don’t even remember leaving the bar or coming here.” Beth took a seat at the table and slowly sipped her coffee. “I gotta say though I do remember you putting Trina in her place though. That was a surprise Riley. I’m really glad I remembered that, I guess you aren’t the prissy Princess that I thought you were.”

  I smiled at her, “I tried telling you all this time that I was a badass.”

  I shrugged my shoulders and she laughed. It was strange but for once we had this sense of calmness between us. It was different. I didn’t feel like I needed to watch my every move. I felt like I could just be myself with her.

  We spent our day laughing so hard we cried. Beth told stories about Zander when they were younger that I knew I would be teasing him about later. Apparently when they we eight years old they thought it would be funny to drag the garden hose into the house and hose down Zander’s mom. Yeah well that didn’t go over too well. They both were grounded and spent the next two weeks cleaning every inch of Zander’s house from top to bottom. It had to pass her inspection and apparently she could be hard to please.

  Our night was spent in front of the television watching chic flicks with pizza and mixed drinks. Kate and Beth found a happy medium and were even found occasionally laughing at one another’s jokes.

  When Zander called I snuck away to my bedroom leaving them on the couch.

  “You still mad at me?”

  “I wasn’t mad at you. How could I be mad? I didn’t know you then, besides I got to tell her off later so it all worked out.”

  “Uh…what happened?”

  I smiled at the uneasiness in his voice. I could just imagine what was running through his mind.

  “Well I need to tell you something.”

  I waited and he said nothing.

  “Zander?”

  “I’m listening.”

  “Last night I ran into Beth. She was pretty drunk and um…well I brought her home with Kate and me. She misses you a lot. I couldn’t leave her there. I was worried about how she would get home.”

  I could hear him sigh on the other end of the line. For a moment I braced myself for his reaction. When he finally spoke I was relieved, “Thank you, baby.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  “We’ll be home tomorrow afternoon. I love you.”

  I smiled, “I love you, drive safe.”

  When I made my way back into the living room I couldn’t help but laugh. “Oh my god…what a vision, I need a camera like now.” Beth and Kate both looked up at me with their eyebrows scrunched. I saw the moment it all made sense when Beth cracked a huge smile.

  “Fuck off Princess.”

  I laughed, “So it’s okay when you paint your toenails…because you rock and I don’t right?”

  “Well yeah, now you’re learning.”

  Her attitude could be overwhelming at times but I think I was slowly getting used to it. I was learning that Beth had spent most her life surrounded by guy friends and she didn’t really know what it was like to have girls around. She was just as much a girl as I was but she just hid it well.

  Chapter Forty-Nine

  ~Zander~

  Driving home Sunday I was nervous as hell. Beth has spent the last couple days with Riley and I was about to see her for the first time since she kissed me. What made it worse was that it was going to be in front of Riley in her apartment.

  I really couldn’t believe how lucky I was. I had Riley in my life. She surprised me at every turn. How many girlfriends would do some of the things she has done? Even after the way Beth had treated her and how she kissed me, Riley still took care of her. If there was ever a question of how much she loved me, she just proved that I had nothing to worry about. I couldn’t wait to see her. That girl had my heart fully and unconditionally; without a doubt she would always be the center of my world.

  When we pulled up at Carson’s I carried my things in and said a quick goodbye.

  “Hey Z, you going over to see Ry?” Carson jogged after me as I walked toward my bike.

  “Yeah.”

  “You wanna ride with me? I got some ass kissing to do for being a dick to Kate.”

  I just shook my head and followed him to his truck. “You better come up with something better than that man. You two need to get your shit together before Riley kills ya both.”

  I lightly knocked on the door and when I heard a squeal from the other side, I laughed. Riley slung the door open and jump into my arms wrapping her legs around my waist. I gripped her hips and she crushed her lips to mine. The moment her tongue brushed against mine I wished we were alone.

  “I missed you like crazy.” She whispered against my lips and I smiled.

  “I missed you too babe.”

  I lowered her to the floor and noticed Beth sitting on the couch looking down at her hands. Riley brushed her fingers over my cheek and I looked down at her once more.

  “You two need to talk. Why don’t you go for a drive?”

  I kissed her softly, “Maybe a walk. I rode with Carson.”

  Riley took her keys off the hook by the door, “Take mine. She needs her best friend back and I know you miss her too.”

  “Ry,” she placed her finger against my lips and I watched her closely.

  “I want you to fix things with her. I trust you completely. Please take her out for lunch and talk. Spend the afternoon with her. Then we can spend the night making up for lost time.”

  I nodded my head, kissing her once more. I looked up over her shoulder and Beth was now looking at us.

  “Come on spaz, let’s go for some pizza.”

  Beth smiled and stood from the couch. When she stopped in the doorway and hugged Riley my chest tightened. I never thought I would see
that from these two but damn it felt good.

  “Thanks Riley…for everything.”

  Riley smiled and I brushed my thumb over her shoulder. “I’ll be back later.”

  I followed Beth down to Riley’s car and I was really nervous. I had no idea how to start this conversation with her. I felt weird and I have never felt so uncomfortable in my life. I know Riley said she was okay with this but I hoped she wasn’t just saying that for my benefit. I didn’t want any tension between her and I. Things have been going great between us and I didn’t want that to change.

  The drive to Marco’s was quiet until we pulled into the parking space. I shut the car off and reached for the handle only to stop when Beth spoke.

  “Zander, I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry for the trouble I caused between you and Riley. I’m sorry that I got jealous and acted like an idiot.” She took a deep breath and looked up at me. “I do love you Zander, very much. I love you like a best friend should love. I was angry at the fact that I barely saw you. Mark and I had been fighting constantly and I felt like I was losing you too. So I went off the deep end and acted desperately. In the end all it got me was dumped by my boyfriend and my best friend. So I did end up being alone.”

  I knew I should say something but I was still so blown away by this whole thing.

  “Riley is amazing Z, and I can see why you love her so much. She’s got a huge heart just like you.”

  I nodded my head and looked out the front window, fighting back the emotions.

  “Your mom would have loved her Zander.”

  That was it. It was all it took to break the dam because she was right, my mom would have adored Riley.

  I turned to Beth and reached forward as we wrapped our arms around one another. “I love you too Beth. I’ve missed having you around. We’ll always be best friends; Riley understands that. It’s not about me choosing between you two. There is always room for you in my life.”