Spring Valley

by T. L. Haddix

  “There are worse things, kits,” he said a while later to the cats, who’d stopped playing to curl up into a mass of sleepy, furry cuteness. “Really, there are.”

  The thing was he knew firsthand how bitter a relationship could turn when it was built around the existence of a child. He didn’t want that for himself, and he didn’t want it for Brooke. He sure as hell didn’t want it for any child of his. Maybe she would be happy about the pregnancy; Walker just didn’t have much hope that’d be the case.

  When Joline stopped by an hour later, following his call, and examined him, she tsked him with maternal concern. “If you’re not feeling better very soon, get yourself to the doctor for a chest x-ray. And for goodness’ sake, stay out of the weather.”

  Given the nature of her job, she had injectable antibiotics on hand, and she gave him a shot in addition to writing him a script for pills that he’d pick up later that day.

  “Staying warm shouldn’t be a problem. I quit my job last night.” He hadn’t meant to say that, but there it was.

  Her jaw dropped as she paused in packing her case back up. “Caleb, good Lord. Do I even want to know why? Have you told Trent and Cora?”

  “I haven’t yet. I will soon. And no, you don’t want to know. Trust me, you don’t.”

  “I’m so sorry, honey. Is there anything we can do?”

  Walker hugged her. “Not a thing. I’ll be fine. I have some ideas.”

  She winked at him. “I’m not surprised. You might be a stubborn cuss of a Wells, but you’ve got a brain in your pretty head. Now, what are you doing about these little monsters?” She picked up Grumpy and Sneezy. “Do you have homes for them yet?”

  “No. I was thinking about keeping them.” He saw the disappointment on her face and quickly added, “But they’re a lot of trouble, and I might not be here much with this new job idea I have. Do you know someone who needs kittens?”

  “You know, I do. Give Marsh a call when you feel better and have him come over. We’ve been talking about adding to the family, and these cuties would be perfect. If you’re sure you want to get rid of them, I mean.” She nuzzled the kittens then set them down with a sigh.

  Marsh was her husband, Marshall. They didn’t have human kids. She was the only one of Eli’s children who’d not produced offspring, a choice that puzzled many in the family though they’d accepted the decision well enough. Instead, they had a menagerie of animals they doted on.

  “I should have thought of you two right off the bat,” Walker said as he followed her to the door. “Jo, can I ask you something personal?”

  “Of course you can. I might not answer, but you can ask.”

  “Do you ever regret not having kids?” He played with the doorknob as he waited for her answer.

  Joline tilted her head and studied him. “Hmmm… okay. I wasn’t expecting that question. I don’t mind it,” she assured him. “I just wasn’t expecting to hear it and especially not from you. Sometimes, yes, but only in an abstract way. We made the right decision for us, and it isn’t like we don’t have a passel of nieces and nephews to love on. Are you thinking about starting a family, Caleb?” There was no teasing in her voice, just quiet concern.

  He hedged. “Would that surprise you?”

  “A little, in a way. I’ve always thought you had the makings to be a good husband and father if you wanted to be. It’d be a shame to let that go to waste. Are you worried about passing on bad genes or some such bunk?”

  Walker laughed. “Maybe. There’s a lot of bad in my past. How can I be sure it’ll outweigh the good?”

  She touched his cheek, pinching lightly. “Because you’re not bad. Bad things happened to you, but that doesn’t make you bad, you silly man. I’ve known you since just about the first day you walked in the door, and I can promise you that you’d have to actually try—and try hard—to be a bad person. I don’t think you have it in you.”

  After she left, he’d forced himself to eat a bite, and now, as he sat on the porch in the sun, resting while he waited for Marsh, he thought about her words. Every one of his aunts and uncles was a straight shooter, but Joline was just about the straightest of them all. It came from dealing with her job for forty years. He knew he could take her word to the bank, and hearing her say he wasn’t intrinsically bad by virtue of his biology… he hadn’t realized how much he’d needed to hear that.

  Maybe, just maybe, this mess with Brooke and with his job would work out. Maybe he could be happy and could make the woman he was in love with happy. He was starting to hope that he could, and it surprised him how very much he wanted to be that man Joline had described, that husband and father. Time would tell whether he’d get a chance to try or not.

  Chapter Eleven

  Persistent knocking pulled Walker from sleep. Feeling wrung out, he’d hit the bed after Marsh left with the kittens, and he’d not moved. When he saw that nearly three hours had passed, he cursed.

  “I’m coming,” he hollered as he stumbled into the hall, his balance off a bit from the illness and the medications. “Hang on to your hat already,” he said as he pulled the door open. “What? Oh. Hi.”

  Brooke stepped back, eyeing him warily. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to disturb you. Are you okay? Were you asleep?”

  He answered with a cough, gesturing her inside before he turned and dashed down the hall to the bathroom to spit. On a positive note, the congestion was definitely breaking up. As he rinsed out his mouth, he prayed for guidance.

  She was in the living room, staring out the window, when he came back out. When he cleared his throat, she turned quickly.

  “Are you okay?” Her eyes were full of quiet concern, but she didn’t try to approach him. Instead, she kept her hands together in front of her, worrying her thumbnail nervously.

  “Just a bit of bronchitis. I need to get some water. Want anything?” he asked, heading to the kitchen.

  “No, thank you.”

  Such politeness, such distance. Walker’s heart tripped and cracked, and he braced himself to get through the rest of the conversation.

  “Gina said you quit,” she said quietly from the kitchen doorway as she watched him get a glass and fill it with cold water from the fridge.

  He hesitated, the water halfway to his mouth. “I did.” He didn’t look at her until he’d finished most of the glass. “What else did Gina say? How bad was it today?”

  Her laugh was rueful, and she folded her arms over her middle. “About as bad as I’ve ever seen it. Everyone and their brother tried to get in. Why’d you quit, Caleb? What happened?”

  “I don’t even know where to start,” he said, setting the glass down to refill it. He capped the gallon of water and moved it aside, then he played with the base of the glass as he forced himself to look at her. “Are you pregnant?”

  Her mouth tightened, and she looked away. She moved her head as though to indicate “no” but then stopped. “I’ve not taken the test yet.” Fire quick, she glanced at him then away again. “I’m too scared.”

  Deciding that one of them was going to have to reach out, Walker crossed to her. He touched her shoulders gently, cursing under his breath when she jumped at even that touch. She closed her eyes, a single tear leaking out.

  “Brooke, look at me.” He wiped the wetness away. “Please look at me.”

  She did, her eyes swimming in tears. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

  He held her while she cried, soft little sobs that were rough despite their quietness. The fact that she clung to him tightly gave him some hope, but he was still scared to death. When he swayed on his feet, she pulled back and wiped her cheeks.

  “You need to sit down.”

  Keeping her hand in his, he led her to the living room and sank onto the couch with a groan. “Talk to me, please.”

  “I don’t know what to say.” But she sat
down beside him, gratifyingly close, and put her hand on his forehead, his cheeks. “You’re warm. Do you need to go to the doctor?”

  “No. Joline came over this morning. Do you need to go see Jeanette?”

  She bit her lip and stared at him. “At some point, yes.” She kicked off her shoes and leaned back, nestling in when he put his arm around her shoulders. “I don’t know how this happened. It shouldn’t have. I swear to you I’ve not missed a single pill. What are we going to do?”

  He kissed her hair. “Why don’t we start with taking a test? We don’t know anything for certain until that’s out of the way.”

  “I’m late. I’m never late. And I’ve done nothing but puke, it feels like, since yesterday afternoon.”

  “How late are we talking?” He caught her hand, which was playing with his T-shirt, picking at the screened logo.

  “A week.”

  “You know that could just be a glitch in the system, so to speak.” He kissed her forehead. “And I probably shouldn’t kiss you, even here. I don’t want you to catch what I have.”

  She looked up and touched his lips. “Bronchitis isn’t contagious usually. And my system doesn’t have glitches, thank you very much.”

  Walker grinned. “You glitchless wonder, you. But that makes more sense than pregnancy. Why don’t I get dressed, and we’ll go to town and get a test? Then we’ll know.”

  An aggravated growl accompanied a soft punch to his ribs. “I have one in my purse. I didn’t expect you to be so cheerful about this.”

  “Nerves. I’m a bundle of nerves,” he said softly. “If it helps, I’ll hold your hand the whole time we wait.”

  She ducked her face into his shoulder, her fingers curling into his shirt. Walker knew better than to push her even though he was clamoring with anxiety to get the test out of the way. After a couple of minutes, she let out a shaky breath and sat up.

  “I’ll be right back.” She went to her purse and pulled out an oblong box, staring at it then looking at him. “Guess we’d better find out for sure, huh?”

  He nodded. “Guess so.”

  The few minutes she was in the bathroom were pure torture. He sat on the couch, hands steepled almost in prayer, and waited. When he was about ready to get up and storm in there, the door opened.

  He shot off the couch, his hands going from his hips to his hair to cross over his chest. “Well?”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know. I just took it.”

  He blinked. “You just took it?”

  Her face turned red, and she scowled. “Performance anxiety, thank you very much.”

  Walker snorted with amusement. “Are you sure you don’t have a bad prostate?”

  Brooke flipped him off, eyes narrowed, as he laughed. But she came over and hugged him even as she shook her head.

  “I don’t know if I’m ready for this,” she whispered.

  He eased his fingers into her hair, gently removing the pins that held it in the twist she preferred for work. “For parenthood or the test results or… us?”

  She gazed up at him. “The first two. I happen to like us just fine.”

  Bronchitis be damned, he had to kiss her. “I like us too,” he murmured a minute later. Tucking her close, he shut his eyes and held on.

  “Caleb? Where are the kittens?”

  “They’ve been adopted. Joline and her husband. He came for them a little while ago. It’s a good home.”

  “I’m sure.”

  When the allotted time had passed, they went down the hall. Hand in hand, just as he’d promised.

  But Brooke stopped at the door and pressed her back against the wall. “I can’t look.”

  Walker kissed her hand and stepped inside. He frowned, looking down at the test. The results were clear, but he wasn’t sure what they meant.

  “Well?” she asked from the hall.

  “One line means negative, right?” He picked up the test and turned the corner, holding it up so she could see. “According to this, you’re not pregnant.”

  They stared at each other without saying a word, then she took the test from him, frowning at it.

  “It has to be a false negative. That’s the most common error,” she said, “at least according to the women’s magazines I read. I’ll have to take it again first thing in the morning. There are two tests in the box. It might be too early. I might need a blood test.”

  “Or maybe the system has its first-ever glitch,” he said softly, surprised by how disappointed the results had left him. “Regardless of the outcome, we’ll figure this out. Right?”

  She gave a little shrug. “I hope so. I should probably go, let you get some rest.”

  Walker’s heart skipped a beat. “You aren’t staying?”

  Brooke smiled. “Are you really up to having guests?”

  He traced her nose. “You’re not a guest. And yeah, I’m up to having you here so long as you don’t mind passing the day on the couch or in bed.”

  This time, she laughed. “We usually do pass the day in bed when I’m here.”

  Groaning, he moved so that he was pinning her to the wall, letting his weight rest against her. “Madam, I love passing the day in bed with you like that, but right now, I don’t even think I’d be up for it if you did all the work. I meant to cuddle, you dirty-minded thing.”

  She kissed him softly. “I thought you loved my dirty mind. Will you tell me if you need me to leave?”

  “I do, more than you know. And sure.” He’d do no such thing, as that day would never come. But they didn’t have to go into that now. Not on top of everything else. For now, it was enough that they were together.

  Chapter Twelve

  Aside from the fact that she loved to be with him, Brooke was glad Caleb hadn’t asked her to go home. She was so exhausted from the stress of the last couple of days that she felt as though she could sleep for a week. But she couldn’t rest just yet. Caleb was making lunch for them, opening a jar of his mother’s homemade chicken soup, and she still had questions that needed answers.

  “Why’d you quit? What happened?”

  He looked down at the pot and stirred the contents, not answering her immediately. “I got in late. Doc had been drinking.”

  As he proceeded to tell her what had happened, what had been said, her heart sank. “Caleb, I’m so sorry. I can’t believe he’d treat you like that. You know better than to listen to him, don’t you?”

  “Mostly. It wasn’t comfortable to hear, that’s for sure. Anyhow, I maybe shouldn’t have reacted the way I did, but I’m not going to stand around and let the man use me as a whipping boy.”

  “No, you shouldn’t. At least you didn’t punch him.”

  “That would only have escalated things. I was tempted though. If I hadn’t learned to control my temper as a kid, I probably would have decked him.”

  “I couldn’t have blamed you if you had.” She pushed her hair back and sighed. “I need to talk to Dad about this. From what Gina said, it was really bad this morning. He doesn’t need to be practicing, not in that state. We all knew, I think, that he had a drink here and there after a long day, but I didn’t realize he was slipping so badly.”

  “I hate that your dad will find out about it, but you’re right. And I didn’t see it, either.” He poured the soup into bowls and brought them to the folding table that served as his dining area. “I’ll need to head in and get the script filled that Joline wrote for me.”

  Brooke touched his hand. “Do you think you’ll feel up to stopping by the house, talking to Dad?”

  He shook his head and laced their fingers together. “Not in the least, especially considering the whole pregnancy situation. But it isn’t really something we can put off, is it?”

  “No. I’m not looking forward to the ordeal myself,” she admitted. She laughed softly. “You know, the night
we lost Belle, I told Dad I was thinking about coming out here. He teased me, told me to make sure I didn’t end up doing what he and Mom did.”

  Caleb gave her a half smile. “Which was?”

  “Get pregnant.”

  He stared at her, then he laughed. “Are you serious?”

  Chagrined, she nodded. “He was in his last year of law school, and she was already out, practicing and everything. She was three years older than him, you see. They’d been dating on and off for a while, and she was fed up with what she called his ‘wishy-washy ways.’ So she showed up on his doorstep dressed to the nines, and the rest is history.” The memory of the way her mother’s eyes would sparkle when she’d tell the story made Brooke smile even as heartache settled in from missing her. “Even after twenty-some years of marriage, she was very proud of the fact that she’d seduced him that night. She never meant to get pregnant, but sure enough… when she found out, she punched him. Knocked him flat on his keister.”

  Caleb was grinning at her, chuckling softly. “What’d Arlen do?”

  She propped her chin on her hand and wrinkled her nose. “Shook it off, got up, declared his love, and rushed her off to stand in front of a judge.”

  “I guess it turned out pretty well for them, then?”

  “Oh, yes. For a while, at least, until we lost her. I don’t know when they slept, they were both so busy, but they never neglected us kids, and they never lost sight of one another.” She blew out a breath and picked up her napkin to blot at her eyes. “It kills me every time I think of them, of how lost he’s been without her.”

  Caleb kissed the back of her hand. “What about Dr. Jeanette?”

  Brooke nodded. “I’ve seen more of the old Arlen in recent months than I’ve seen in years. That’s one reason I hope he decides to go public with her.” She shook her head. “Enough of the retrospection.” She grimaced when she looked at her half-full bowl. “I don’t think I can eat this.”