1983: Cruel Summer (Love in the 80s #4)

by Amber Lynn Natusch

  I slept for a couple of hours, then got up and made enough food to tide me over until the movies. I planned to buy an enormous tub of popcorn for myself and slap any hand that drifted toward it. When it came to that salty, heavenly snack, I didn’t share. Ever.

  I drove to the pool and parked in the regular lot this time. Construction didn’t happen on the weekend, so there were spots to be had for once. I knew Wendy was on the schedule with me, along with the Krissy and Tess. Clearly, I was not excited to be there. I had no doubt that my antics at the party were common knowledge at that point.

  Seemed like I was going to be the only one doing the walk of shame that day.

  “Hey, Iz,” Wendy called from behind the counter. “Glad to see you’re looking well today.” Yep. She knew.

  “I’m feeling great,” I said, slipping in through the door. “Where do you want me?”

  “I’m going to have you float for a bit. I have some work to do back here.”

  “Fine with me.” I got my stuff together and pulled my ball cap on, knowing that I wouldn’t have an umbrella to protect me from the heat of the sun. I was ready to walk out the back door to the pool deck when Wendy stopped me in my tracks with a single question.

  “Braxton didn’t come home last night. Any idea where he got to?”

  I tried to control my expression when I turned to face her, but it was clear that she already knew. Whether she’d been home when he returned or he’d stopped by work to let her know he was okay, she knew the night’s tale. The question I had to ask myself was whether or not I wanted to play along.

  “The last time I saw him, he was driving off in his truck.”

  I smiled wide, pleased that I’d both told the truth and danced around her question. While she tried to reply, I walked out the door and made my rounds. All I could think was how proud Braxton would have been with how I’d just jammed his sister up. That was no easy task—and I’d just nailed it.

  If only shutting Tess up had proven as simple.

  She was headed into the pool house, having finished her rotation. The scathing look she gave me let me know that there wasn’t a chance in hell that she was going to walk on by with her mouth shut. The moment she was close enough, she started in on me.

  “How nice of the princess to come down from her palace to work with the commoners today.”

  I kept walking, willing to let that one slide. I’d probably deserved it anyway.

  “Funny,” she continued, stopping just in front of me. “You’re so disgusted by all of us inbred rednecks, but you sure seemed cozy with more than one of us last night. I think I counted at least four. Maybe five if you count Braxton. I never did see him join the rest of us after your outburst. Decide to slum it one last time, did ya?”

  “Shut up and keep walking, Tess.”

  “Not likely, princess. Everyone else in this town might be enamored with you—or at least they were before last night. But not me. I know what you really are.”

  “Oh yeah? And what exactly is that?”

  “Trash.” She said the word with such confidence that it took me aback for a moment. “Expensive trash, but trash all the same. Your whole family is. The entire town knows it too. They’re all just too afraid to say anything about it…wouldn’t want to go swimming with the fishes, as they say in your family’s circle of friends.”

  I could feel the blood drain from my face as she spoke.

  Perhaps my family’s secret wasn’t nearly as well kept as I’d thought.

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” I said, though my tone lacked the conviction that Tess’ had when she not so subtly accused my father of having mob ties.

  “Your face says otherwise.”

  She had a point there.

  “I’d tread lightly about this, Tess.”

  “Are you threatening me? No need to. I’m not dumb enough to publicly announce what the whole town already thinks. I don’t have a death wish.”

  With that, she turned and made her way back to pool house while I stood in the middle of the deck looking dumbfounded. Did it matter that Tess knew what she thought she knew? Not really. She had no power or influence in town. But I wondered if what she’d said was true, that everyone did have their suspicions about my father. He’d been nothing but a model citizen in Johnsonville. He was the Rotary Club president, a volunteer firefighter, and known to do pro bono defense cases for certain local individuals. Yes, he’d defended some nefarious criminals in state cases, but he was a damn good defense attorney. That was his job. The fact that an occasional mobster landed in his lap was hardly enough to link him to organized crime—at least in the public eye.

  But the sad truth was, my father was far from clean.

  I tried to focus on work after my little run-in with the mouthy teenager, but I just couldn’t shake what she’d said and the thought that everyone in town who’d ever been nice to me probably had done so out of fear rather than genuine intent. My life had always been a lie on some level or another, me pretending I didn’t know what my dad did, both at home as well as in public. The town knowing who my father was connected to added a whole new layer of untruth to it all.

  With that seed planted firmly in my mind, I couldn’t help but ask myself the most obvious question of all: Did Braxton know too?

  I went home that night and grabbed a quick bite to eat. The boys were coming to get me at eight, which left me only a few minutes to get cleaned up and dressed. I threw on the first clean items I found (jean shorts and a tank) and slipped on my sandals. Just as I was pulling my hair back in a ponytail, I heard a horn honking in my driveway.

  With purse in hand, I ran down the stairs and out the front door, making sure to lock up behind me. Braxton was standing next to the truck, smiling at me like he always used to. I forced one in return, but I knew it didn’t reach my eyes. Judging by the concern that bled into his expression, he hadn’t missed that fact.

  “You ready?” he asked, walking up the pathway to meet me.

  “For you guys? Hardly, but I’ll make do.”

  “C’mon, Izzy,” Tad shouted from the passenger seat of Simmons’ truck that sat parked behind Braxton’s. “We’ll be on our best behavior. Promise.”

  “About that,” I said, walking up to the truck that held Tad, Scooter, and Simmons. “I need to talk to you guys.” I hoisted myself up by the open window and hung on the door, half in the truck and half out. “What I said last night—”

  “Ah, now don’t you worry ‘bout that, Izzy girl. You was just drunk. That’s all.”

  “No. Let me say this.” I looked from Tad to Scooter, who sat crammed in between Tad and Simmons, then finally, the notorious Simmons in the driver’s seat. “I was a total bitch. I was mad and I took it out on everyone. And, though some of what I said was true, I shouldn’t have included you three in that.” They all smiled and gave me a nod to let me know that we were square. “Well, maybe not you, Simmons. You were a royal pain in my ass in high school…”

  The mischievous quirk of my brow set the whole truck full of boys laughing.

  “She’s got ya there, Simmons,” Scooter said after he’d composed himself.

  Simmons only shrugged.

  “What can I say? I’m a changed man now.”

  “Yes. That seems fair enough,” I agreed. “Now, if that’s settled, we have some macho man flick to see. And I’m soooooo excited about it.”

  “Then get your skinny ass off my truck and into Braxton’s so we can get goin’.”

  I did as Simmons directed and dropped down out of the truck to the ground. Braxton stood behind me, arms crossed, head shaking.

  “You could get away with murder, you know that?”

  A flash of adrenaline shot through me at his words. After everything I’d been contemplating that afternoon, they hit a little too close to home.

  “I probably could,” I muttered under my breath as I brushed past him to his truck.

  “What’d you say?” he asked, but I just
blew him off.

  “Nothing. Let’s go. We’re going to be late.”

  Braxton didn’t say anything else about it. He just got in and waited for Simmons to pull out so he could follow suit. Ten minutes later, we were at the movie theater, tickets in hand, along with my massive tub of off-limits popcorn.

  “That thing is bigger than you, Izzy,” Tad pointed out as we sat down in the back of the theater. It was moderately full, but it wasn’t too hard to find seats for all five of us together. The three stooges filed in first, followed by Braxton, with me behind him. By the time the previews started to run the seat next to me was still empty so I balanced my popcorn on it.

  “Your snacks shouldn’t need their own seat, Iz,” Braxton said in my ear. The feel of his breath ruffling my hair sent shivers up my spine.

  “Apparently, I disagree.”

  “Are you really not going to share that?”

  “Yep.”

  I turned to look at him to show him just how serious I was about that, but the second I did, his arm shot past me and snatched a handful of my buttery goodness. His lunge for my food placed his face close to mine. Too close. I shied away, shrinking back into my seat where I stayed for the better part of the movie. The only time I moved was to dive into the vat of popcorn in the seat next to me.

  “You okay?” he leaned in and asked me during a particularly gory fight scene.

  “Yeah. Fine.”

  “You don’t seem fine.”

  “Well…you didn’t mention that there’d be a psychopath serial killer in this movie when you convinced me to come.”

  “Because I knew you wouldn’t if I did.”

  “You’re such a sneak, Braxton!” I hit him in the arm for good measure, and he pretended to be hurt.

  “That’s gonna cost you some of that popcorn, Iz.”

  “Sh! I’m trying to watch this.” I shot him a playful grin, then reached over and grabbed the tub of popcorn to pass to him.

  Even in the dark of the theater, I could see the genuine surprise in his expression.

  “Wow. Did hell just freeze over?”

  “Just shut up and eat before I change my mind.”

  Simmons leaned forward and looked over at me and Braxton.

  “If you two don’t quit flirtin’ and shut up so I can hear this, I’m gonna lay a whoopin’ on the both of ya real soon.”

  “Don’t make me come over there,” I warned, thankful that he couldn’t see the flush of my cheeks at that moment. Once again I found myself sliding down in my seat, eyes glued to the movie that I didn’t really want to watch.

  Braxton and I didn’t speak for the rest of the film.

  Once it was done, we all filed out of the theater to our respective vehicles.

  “You two wanna come over for a bit?” Tad asked. “My parents are gone. We could do some drinkin’, not that Izzy’s up to it. She’s still lookin’ a little green around the gills.”

  “I’ve had a long day. I think I’m just going to have Brax take me home. I’m sure he’ll head over after he drops me off.”

  I looked up at Braxton, who didn’t seem excited by my plan.

  “Sure. Whatever you want.”

  Simmons made a strange face and hopped up into his truck. Tad and Scooter hugged me goodnight, then did the same, leaving Braxton and me alone in the parking lot. The three stooges peeled out, waving out the windows as they did. It was a miracle those three hadn’t wound up in jail after turning eighteen.

  “So home?” Braxton asked, opening the passenger door for me.

  “Yeah. I think that’s best.”

  He nodded and waited for me to climb in before closing the door behind me. I could tell he was unhappy about something, but I didn’t care. I wanted to go home. To be alone. To figure some shit out. Having him around made that so much harder. We fell into old habits way too easily, and I had to keep reminding myself that we weren’t those two kids anymore.

  Even if I wished we still were.

  We were quiet while he drove through town, the few streetlights lining the main street pouring into the dark cab of his truck. I knew it would only be a matter of time before he asked me what was wrong. He’d always been rather direct in matters like those. But even knowing that the question was coming, I still waited for him to ask it. For whatever reason, I couldn’t bring myself to say it out loud even though I kept rolling it over and over in my mind.

  Did you know who my father worked for when we were growing up?

  He pulled into my long, winding driveway and parked the car near the three car garage. Then he killed the engine and sat there for a moment, staring out the windshield as if he were still driving. My palms started to sweat a bit as the tension in the truck grew. I wanted to just say goodnight and hop out, hoping he wouldn’t follow, but I knew better. He was Braxton Bryant, after all.

  “Izzy,” he started, still looking straight ahead. “I know that you’re having a hard time with this friend thing, but—”

  “Did you know that my dad had ties to the mob?”

  I just blurted it out like that. No lead in. No warning. I spat the question out like the poison it had proven to be that evening.

  His head turned to me slowly and evenly. The movement was eerie to watch. The expression he wore was one of fear and disbelief. His momentary silence left me to wonder if it was fear of my question or the fear of being found out that flashed across his face.

  “Yes. I did.”

  “You did?” I asked, my words barely a whisper.

  “I’ve known for a long time, Iz. But that never bothered me. I need you to know that.”

  “How come you never said anything?”

  “What was I going to say? That I didn’t approve? That I wouldn’t be your friend because of it?”

  “Well, no, but—”

  “Jesus, Izzy, my father was a low-life drug dealer, thief, gambler, and about a million other things, none of which were good. So how was I going to judge you by your father’s choices in life when you sure as hell didn’t do that to me?”

  I paused for a minute, trying to work through things in my mind.

  “That didn’t…that wasn’t part of the reason that you—”

  I couldn’t seem to finish my sentence. Though I doubted it was a factor, I wanted to know if that was part of the reason he decided to part ways with me our senior year.

  Realization dawned in his expression and his features tightened as a result. I couldn’t tell if he was angry at the implication or frustrated that I was bringing that up again after we’d just put the whole thing to rest. Either way, something about what I’d said seemed to bother him, and I immediately wished I hadn’t.

  “Your father had nothing to do with why I did what I did. Understand?”

  “Okay. I just…I just wasn’t sure.”

  “What happened that made you bring this up, Iz? It’s clearly been bothering you all night.”

  “One of the girls at work said something about it to me. I guess I just thought that people didn’t know about my dad, that’s all. It surprised me. Then it surprised me more when I realized that you might have known and never said anything.”

  His features softened.

  “I wasn’t trying to lie to you. I just didn’t see the point in acknowledging something I assumed you already knew. That’s all.” He cupped my cheek in his hand and stared at me. “Who your parents are or where you came from or how much money you had… that stuff never mattered to me, okay?”

  I nodded.

  “Okay.”

  Sitting there, looking at each other that way reminded me so much of the blissful night we had together—right before everything went wrong. I pulled away from his touch and opened the truck door, ready to jump out.

  “Don’t want to keep the boys waiting,” I said over my shoulder. “There won’t be anything left for you by the time you get there.”

  “Izzy, wait!” He lunged across the cab and grabbed my arm, gently pulling me away from the door.
>
  “Braxton, what—”

  His mouth on mine silenced me. The sweet press of his lips was warm and welcome and all I’d remembered it to be. At least it was until my brain revolted, smacking my heart repeatedly until I pulled away from him, scooting my way back to the door.

  “I have to go,” I said, jumping out of the truck and slamming the door. I practically ran to the front steps of my house, fumbling with my keys to find the right one to unlock the door.

  “Izzy, I’m sorry!” Braxton shouted behind me. The slam of his truck door let me know he was on his way up to apologize profusely. I wasn’t ready for that. I just wanted to get inside. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

  “It’s fine, Brax. You should go.”

  He reached around me and wrapped his hand around the keys, making me unable to unlock the door. I turned to face him, his expression already telling me all I needed to know. Braxton wasn’t ready to be friends with me. He wanted me back. Apparently we’d both been fooling ourselves.

  “I didn’t plan to do that. That’s not what this night was about. I promise. I need you to believe that.”

  “I do, Braxton. I get it. Really. Sitting there in your truck after a movie together… I think it just transported you back in time. It’s not really your fault.”

  “Didn’t it do the same for you?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe? Either way, I just can’t afford to let it. I’ve spent so much time building up walls where you’re concerned, and then in you come, swinging a sledgehammer, trying to knock them all down in a couple days’ time. That’s a lot to handle. Throw in what happened with Jason and I’m just a bit of a mess at the moment. I can’t think clearly.”

  “Neither can I,” he said softly. “Not about you.”

  “Then maybe we need to do things differently.”

  “Or maybe we need to stop trying so hard to be something we’re not and just let this all play out. For better or worse. At least we’ll know in the end that we gave it a shot.”

  “I don’t think I can.” My voice was hollow and empty, and it accurately portrayed how I felt at the thought of losing Braxton again. It was more than I could handle and I knew it. I barely survived losing him the first time. If he did it again, I wouldn’t fare nearly as well.