by Pandora Pine
Dec sighed, running a hand through his coppery hair. “Rem, I spent eighteen months trying to get you to talk to me. All I got back in return was your silence, so I figured that was your way of talking.”
Rem’s frown deepened. He hated to admit it, but Declan had a point. Over the first year and a half they’d been apart, Declan had sent numerous emails, left voice messages and had even gone as far as sending hand-written letters to his house.
Remington had kept all of the messages, but hadn’t responded to any of them. Over the last six months, he hadn’t gotten so much as a post card from Dec. “So, this is my fault?”
“You asked me to come here to talk about Gemma’s lisp and how I think it should be treated.” Dec took a deep breath and sat up straighter in his chair. “But, if you want to talk about this instead, fine. I begged and pleaded with you to let me tell you what happened that night, Rem. What you saw or what you thought you saw wasn’t what really happened.”
Remington’s hands balled into fists on the top of his desk. “What I thought I saw? Jesus fucking Christ, Dec! I walked into our home and saw you kissing the fucking plumber!”
Dec shook his head sadly. “No, you didn’t.”
Rem would never forget that night. Instead of coming right home after school let out, he’d gone shopping for the ingredients to make Declan’s favorite dinner. He knew Dec was home waiting for the plumber who was coming to work on a clogged pipe in the kitchen. Remington slammed his fists on his desk. “Don’t you tell me what I fucking saw! You were kissing that muscle-bound grease-monkey!”
When he’d walked into the kitchen with his arms loaded with grocery bags, Declan was kissing the bulked-up plumber. He’d even had a streak of grease running across his left cheek.
“He was kissing me,” Dec said sadly.
“Don’t play semantics with me!” Rem rifled a hand through his dark hair and pinned Declan with furious eyes.
Declan sighed like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. “He’d been flirting with me the whole time he was in our kitchen and I got the idea he had already fixed the pipe and was just stalling so he could spend more time with me.”
“God, you’re a fucking narcissist.” Rem rolled his eyes.
Dec shrugged his broad shoulders. “Obviously the sink was fixed because it worked after you threw the plumber out of the house.” Declan cocked an eyebrow at his former lover. “Anyway, just before you walked in, this asshat tells me he’s not going to take ‘no’ for an answer. He slid his index finger down the side of my cheek before he grabbed me and kissed me. That’s when you walked in.”
“You expect me to believe that bullshit?”
“I was struggling to get away from him and that’s when he dug his fingers into my arms. I had bruises for days after that. I sent you pictures of my arms but I’m guessing you didn’t look at them.”
“You’re telling me the plumber sexually assaulted you?” Remington couldn’t believe what Declan was telling him. He vaguely remembered a few of Declan’s earlier emails having picture attachments, but he hadn’t bothered to open then up.
“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m telling you. I didn’t want him to kiss me. The only man I wanted to kiss for the rest of my life was you. Hell, Rem, I even bought a ring…”
That was the last thing Rem expected to hear. Declan had been ready to propose?
“I know it was hell on you when you found out your college boyfriend had been cheating on you left, right and sideways, but just because he cheated on you didn’t automatically mean that I would.”
Knowing Declan had a good point, Rem cleared his throat. He didn’t have the time or the energy to deal with the fact that he’d been so quick to pull the trigger to end their relationship or why he’d been unwilling, until today, to hear Declan’s side of the story. “So, about Gemma?”
Dec sighed again, not sounding as world-weary as he had before, and slipped Gemma’s file back into his briefcase before standing up. “Gemma has a simple frontal lisp. It can be corrected in a few months of speech therapy. I read Ben Wagner’s report on Gemmy. It’s apparent from watching her interact with Tucker how close they’ve gotten. I’d build on that relationship in order to rebuild your relationship with her.”
Declan walked to the door and twisted the knob, but didn’t bother to turn around. “Oh, and one last thing, Ben’s right about getting her a pet. I volunteer at the Paws and Claws animal shelter on Merrimac Street. We’ve got a litter of kittens that are ready to be placed in their forever homes.” Declan slipped out the door, closing it softly behind him.
“How do you know about Ben’s suggestion that I should get Gemma a pet?” Rem sucked in a deep breath. “Are you sleeping with him?”
His shoulders sagging, Dec turned around to face his former lover. “When you kicked me out, I didn’t just lose my boyfriend, I lost my best friend. Ben was there for me, becoming the best friend I needed. He listened to me. He believed me. He trusts me.”
Shaking his head sadly, Dec walked out of the office.
His head spinning over everything Dec had just revealed, Rem could only watch him go.
3
“Okay, the kids are settled in with Toy Story. Now talk.” Knox Keaton set a hand on Remington’s shoulder and sat in the seat next to him.
Rem had no idea where to begin. He looked around Nash Spencer’s kitchen table. All of his friends were smiling at him encouragingly. “Gemma’s appointment with Ben went great. She’s healthy and he had a few pointers on how to bridge the gap between us.”
“Her behavior was perfect this morning. She ate her breakfast and asked politely for more bacon.” Bronson McKinnon linked hands with Nash, kissing the back of his fiancé’s hand.
“That’s what always happens. When we’re with other people or in public, she behaves perfectly, but once we’re alone it’s an all-out war.” Rem sighed. “At least that’s what it feels like.”
“One of the kiddos in my class last year had a similar issue. He was a great kid in school and when I met his mother on parent-teacher night, it was like she was describing a completely different child.” Knox looked around the table at their friends.
“Did that little boy lose his father?” Rem couldn’t help wondering if anger was a form of grief.
Knox nodded and reached for the coffee carafe, pouring more into his cup before doing the same for Ben Wagner, who was sitting next to him. “In a way. The parents split up and the father wasn’t granted any visitation. He was one of your patients, wasn’t he?” Knox turned to the pediatrician.
“He was.” Ben answered guardedly folding his arms over his chest.
“So, how did you fix him? When I met with his mother a few months later, she said his behavioral issues had been corrected.” Knox sounded genuinely interested in knowing the answer.
Ben rapped a fist against Knox’s blond head. “Hello? Doctor-patient confidentiality! Duh…” Ben burst out laughing.
Knox rolled his eyes. “Okay, well let’s say that you have a hypothetical patient with the same issue as the real patient. How would you fix him?”
Ben raised an eyebrow. “I’m a doctor, not a mechanic.”
“Jesus Christ, Doctor McCoy…” Knox held up the Vulcan salute.
“The behavior of the student Knox is talking about got better when his mother realized the reason for his acting out was not seeing his father,” Ben said grudgingly.
“And since Roma’s gone, that won’t help Gemma.” Rem stood up and rinsed out his empty coffee cup. “I’ve been thinking a lot about your suggestion to get her a pet, Ben. Declan also said it was a good idea.”
“I knew this would all come back to Declan if we were patient.” Nash batted his eyelashes at Bronson.
“WTF, Nash! You and Knox agreed that I should dump his cheating ass!” Remington sat down hard in his seat. “The both of you were all over me two years ago to dump Dec’s cheating ass and now you’re acting like you want me to get back with
him.”
Knox and Nash exchanged uneasy looks. “We were wrong to encourage you to not even hear Declan out.” Nash reached a hand out to Rem. “We were both so angry that he hurt our friend that we may have given you bad advice.”
Rem felt a bubble of laughter rise up through his chest. He couldn’t help letting it out. His friends exchanged looks like they were wondering if now was a good time to call the men with the butterfly nets.
He was laughing so hard tears were streaming down his face. His friends had never admitted they were wrong about Dec before. Nash usually blamed Knox and vice-versa. “You may have given me bad advice, but I was the one who decided not to call Dec back when I should have.” Rem sobered instantly, taking a shaky breath. “I really should have heard him out.”
“Did he finally tell you what happened that night with the plumber?” Bronson rolled his mug around between his long fingers.
Nodding, Rem looked up at his friends. “He told me the plumber grabbed him and started kissing him. He struggled so hard that the bastard’s fingers left bruises on his arms.”
Reaching into his back pocket, Rem pulled out his phone. With shaking fingers he pulled up the email with the pictures of Dec’s injuries attached. He handed the phone to Knox who shared it with Ben.
“Those are some serious bruises,” Ben said quietly. “Sexual assault on men is even more underreported than it is with women.” He passed the phone to Bronson. “I’m glad he finally told you.”
“Finally told me? Ben, did you know about this before now?”
Ben nodded. “We collaborated on a case about the time you broke up with him. We hit things off.”
“Wait, were you dating Rem’s ex?” Nash shot Rem an appalled look.
Rem’s stomach pitched like a dingy in a hurricane at Nash’s question. Had Ben and Declan been hooking up this whole time? Dec said they’d been just friends, but that didn’t mean it was true. Rem didn’t know why, but the thought of the two of them together hurt more than knowing Dec had been hooking up with random men.
“No, Nash. The surest path to a broken heart is to date a guy on the rebound. Dec and I became friends and started hanging out together. One night after a few too many Heinekens, he told me all about how things ended between him and Rem.”
“I can’t help thinking Declan must have thought I was there to save him when I came home, but instead I let my insecurities take over and I kicked him out of our house.” Rem shook his head, not wanting to think about how hard it had been for Declan to deal with being assaulted and losing his boyfriend at the same time.
“What are you going to do now?” Knox asked.
“I’m going to do what Gemma’s pediatrician told me to do and get her a kitten. I don’t have the time or the energy to deal with the Declan situation right now.” Rem made air quotes. He would deal with his ex later, once he figured out how the hell to apologize for what he’d done.
Ben was all smiles. “I don’t mean to contradict you, but Dec volunteers at Paws and Claws. He was the one who helped me adopt my cat Fluffy.”
Knox burst out laughing. “You named a cat Fluffy?”
Ben shrugged. “She’s fluffy. What would you have named her, Klingon?”
“Captain Kirk, duh…” Knox rolled his eyes.
“You know, this might not be a bad time to get Tucker that puppy he’s been begging for.” Nash grinned up at Bronson.
“Great minds think alike, babe. Tucker? Gemmy?” Bronson half-shouted.
“Gemmy? Why the hell is everyone calling her that? Dec called her that yesterday.” In the five years he’d known his niece, no one had ever called her that.
“Tucker calls her Gemmy, so we do too. It’s a cute nickname and it makes her smile.” Bronson waggled his eyebrows. “Who knew our son would turn out to be the cool kid?”
Rem heard pounding footsteps as the kids ran into the kitchen.
As usual, Gemma was clutching her ratty, black stuffed cat. Rem found himself looking forward to being able to place the real thing in her arms. He was just worried how she’d take the news from him. “Bronson has a surprise for both of you.” Rem knew it was the coward’s way out, but he just wanted to see Gemma’s face light up when his friend made the announcement.
Bronson shot Rem a questioning eyebrow. “What would you both think about going to Paws and Claws today?”
“For my puppy?” Tucker’s eyes bugged out and he groaned before fake-fainting, landing flat on his back on the kitchen floor.
Bronson burst out laughing. “And also for Gemma’s kitten.”
“Why do I get a kitten?” Her suspicious eyes moved from Bronson to Remington who was smiling brightly.
Rem was heartbroken. He was hoping Gemma would imitate Tucker and fake-faint over the surprise of his gift.
The last emotion he expected Gemma to feel was suspicion. “You take such good care of Whiskers,” Rem pointed to the well-loved stuffed cat, “that I thought you’d be just as good with the real thing.”
Gemma scowled at her uncle and turned to look down at Tucker who was still lying flat on the floor.
One of Tucker’s green eyes popped open. “You love kittens, Gemmy! Maybe they’ll have a black one just like Whiskers.”
“Maybe.” She folded her arms over her chest and walked over to Ben. “Doctor Ben, will you help me pick out a kitten?”
Rem swore he felt his heart stop beating in his chest. He drew a ragged breath that felt like his lungs were filled with broken glass.
As hurt as he was over his niece asking Ben to help her pick out a kitten, he knew this wasn’t about him. This was about Gemma finding a way through her grief.
XX
The morning had been a busy one at the animal shelter. Declan had helped place two of the newly adoptable kittens and an over-active Labrador mix. He knew it was a long-shot, but he was hoping Remington and Gemma would come in today.
It had been strangely surreal for him to finally tell his ex what had happened with the plumber two years ago. He thought he'd feel a sense of relief or would feel ten pounds lighter, but he'd felt neither.
Dec still missed Remington. He knew finally hearing the truth wasn't going to send Rem running back into his arms, but to be honest, he'd expected a bit more of a reaction than he'd gotten.
Rem had stood there with his hands fisted on the desk blotter staring at Dec like they'd never met each other. His stubborn ex hadn't even apologized for having gotten the story all wrong and for making him wait two years to tell it. Dec sighed. It was all water under the bridge.
He'd spent the last two years trying to figure out how to get Rem to listen to his side of the story. Now that the story was out, he had no idea what the hell came next for him.
Did he troll the gay bars looking for a hook-up or did he start an online dating profile to find a serious relationship? He wanted to get married and have a family of his own. He'd been willing to hold out for Rem, but now that his ex knew the truth, Declan knew there was nothing left for him to wait for. Two years was long enough to pine after any man.
Rolling his eyes at himself, Dec grabbed the kitten chow and headed toward the kennel where the new kittens were housed. He'd really wanted Gemma to have her pick of the six baby cats, but now there were only four left. The two grey tabbies had been adopted earlier this morning by a family with twin daughters. It made perfect sense that the identical girls have identical kittens.
Opening the kennel door, Dec could hear the kittens crying. They'd only been away from their mother for a few days now and the babies cried almost non-stop.
He plopped their chow in the food bowls and sat down on the concrete floor. He could feel the cold rise up through the seat of his Levi's. The remaining kittens ran for him, rather than the food, using their tiny claws to scale his pants. He could feel the claws bite his skin as they broke through the denim.
A bell jingled from the front of the shelter. Dec knew it was silly to think the ringing bell was Remington and Gemma, bu
t he couldn't help getting his hopes up.
Even though they'd been apart for the last two years, Remington had been a huge part of his life. His ex had never been far from his thoughts.
As much as Declan knew he needed to move on with his life, he couldn't just walk away from that history, as much as his brain urged that he should.
"Got a couple of forever families for you, Dec!" Joe Burton called through the kennel door.
"Send ‘em on in!" Dec called back, not bothering to get up from the floor. The kittens were stuck to him and he knew it was going to take a while for the families to look at the selection of animals and make a choice.
"I always knew you'd end up in the clink!" Ben Wagner laughed as he approached the kitten kennel.
"Ben, what are you doing here? Please tell me it’s not to return Fluffy." Declan tried to look around his friend to see who else had come with him.
"No way. The only way you’re getting my pussy back is when you pry her out of my cold, dead hands.” Ben grinned at Declan. “Bronson and Nash want to get Tucker the puppy they promised him months ago and Rem wants to get Gemma a kitten."
Dec couldn't believe his ears. Rem was here?
"Hi, Mr. Declan!" Gemma ran toward the kennel. "Are these your kitties?"
"No, honey. These kittens are up for adoption. Do you want to meet them?"
"I th-ure do!" Gemma looked up at Ben excitedly. "Can I go in-thide?"
"Why don't we ask Uncle Rem, huh?" Ben turned around to motion Rem over.
Declan watched as Gemma's face crumpled. His heart broke for Rem. He remembered how Gemma had been glued to Rem’s side when she'd been little. There were even entire weekends when the little girl would stay at their house to give Roma some time to herself.
