Obsessed

by Terry Towers

  I took pause as I reached for the photo album. There’s no way he made enough money working security to pay for all this. No way. Even the highest paid bodyguards didn’t make this kind of money, hell, I barely made this kind of money. Came from a rich family maybe? One thing was for sure, we needed to have a nice long honest talk if we were going to continue with a relationship. Though, technically, Elijah had been right, we hadn’t exactly classified what it was that was between us. It had only been a little over a week, but perhaps we needed to nail that down as well.

  There was a lot to talk about when he got home.

  Snatching up the photo album, I carried it over to the bed. As I carried it, a book that had been between the pages fell out: Wuthering Heights, I remembered reading that in high school. Grabbing the book from the floor, I got onto the bed and sat cross-legged with the album placed on my lap and Wuthering Heights at my side. I’d examine the book later, maybe read it again, I’m sure I loved it all those years ago. I could have sworn the one he’d shown me with our pictures had been red, but this one was black. I shrugged. What did I know, I was buzzing and tired and a million other things that night, the colour of a photo album was the last thing I was concerned about.

  Flipping the cover open, I frowned. This wasn’t the right album. I was about to snap it closed, but how could I just slam it shut and not take a peek? I mean, really, who wouldn’t take the chance to know more about the man whose past was a complete mystery? Sure he’d be mad if he thought I was snooping, but it wasn’t really snooping, it was an accident.

  The first page was of a little boy, maybe aged 5 with a slender woman standing side by side in front of a Christmas tree. I assumed it was Elijah and his mom, his eyes were unmistakable although nothing else about him resembled the man I knew aside from the fact they both had beautiful deep sapphire blue eyes. I flipped the pages, slowly, examining each photo. The people were all the same; Elijah, his mom, or the two of them together. As I proceeded through the album the pictures of the boy aged; by the time he looked to be about 12 I started to get a feeling in the pit of my stomach, like I knew these people. Not so much the woman, but the little boy.

  It wasn’t until I hit the final page of the album – it was a school photo – that I knew without a doubt who the boy was and tears filled my eyes as memories I’d long since buried came rushing back to me. The boy I was looking at was named Trevor Ward. So, was Elijah actually Trevor Ward? It seemed so insane, but it had to be. The eyes didn’t lie. Picking up the Wuthering Heights book I flipped through the pages and the inside back cover confirmed my suspicions: written in blue pen was the name, Sidney Lopez.

  Chapter 14

  Trevor Ward – 12 Years Ago

  “Your whore mother sucks cock for money,” Robbie Kane said.

  “Dirty crack bitch. No wonder you’re such a pathetic loser,” Chris Vaughn added to a round of laughs from the other boys.

  “Yeah, my uncle saw the crack whore taking it in the ass behind his restaurant last night,” Sammy Ames informed them.

  I cringed. I was trying really hard to be a man and not let the taunts get to me. But it was hard. I hated my mother for putting me in this positon. A fifteen-year-old shouldn’t be haunted by the acts of his parents, but I was. I had no idea who my dad was, neither did my mother, because what the boys were saying was true. She was a crack whore who collected a welfare check and she did suck cock for money.

  “Shut up. All of you!” I screamed at the four boys who had me cornered in the boys’ bathroom no doubt intent on shoving my head in the toilet bowl once they were finished making fun of me. And no one would help. The boys doing the teasing were the popular boys at school. School jocks. No one crossed their path and no one would dare challenge them. The taunting had been going on for ten minutes, but in truth it had gone on all school year, another two months and it would finally be summer vacation and I’d have a couple of months being left alone. Thank God – if I made it that long.

  They laughed.

  “What’s wrong little baby? You can’t handle the truth?” Chris asked, taking a menacing step forward.

  I couldn’t move back any further, as it was I was in the corner, literally, trying to hide behind a urinal. “Leave me alone! Why won’t you leave me alone?” I screamed, I was so tired of this. Why did they hate me so much? I wasn’t the whore, it was my mother. I didn’t spend all our money on drugs, it was her. I loved her, but mostly hated her. I tried telling her once how badly I was teased. She laughed and told me to toughen up.

  I hated her. But it wasn’t her fault. It was the drugs. But I still hated her. And I hated them. But mostly I hated myself.

  “Ahhh, poor kid,” Robbie said and looked at his buddies, “maybe we should let him be.”

  A sliver of hope crept into me. Maybe this was the day they’d leave me be. God, please let this be the day. I’d already endured spitballs and having my lunch, which consisted of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on dry bread, stolen from me and tossed into the fountain today.

  His buddies nodded their agreement and I could feel the tears spring up into my eyes. I was being granted a pardon.

  “Come on.” Robbie stepped aside and made the other three clear a path towards the exit. “You’re free to go.”

  The relief was so great that a tear escaped my eyes and I sniffed; I wiped the tear with the back of my hand. I felt so stupid for crying in front of the boys, but I couldn’t help it, I was so close to my breaking point. There’s only so much I could endure.

  I slowly began making my way to the exit; with each step a weight was lifted from my shoulders. I was within reaching distance of the door handle when two sets of hands grabbed my upper arms and hauled me backwards. All four boys began laughing hysterically as I began to scream and fight against the hands that were pulling me towards the stalls.

  “Hey, there’s one with shit still in it in the back. He didn’t get his lunch today, maybe he’d like a snack.” The voice was Robbie’s.

  Ohmygod! They were going to dunk my head into shit water. They’d never done that before. I screamed, kicked, cried, but none of my efforts mattered. They outnumbered me and even if they didn’t they were all jocks, bigger and stronger. I was a scrawny kid and to be honest severely malnourished. I didn’t stand a chance.

  I had no idea who had their hand on the back of my head, my eyes were focused on the big chunk of shit in the toilet. It was huge and it was getting closer and closer to my face. “Nooooooo!” I screamed. Just as my face was about to hit the water the door to the bathroom flung open with a bang and a female voice commanded my release. Normally the boys wouldn’t have paid any mind, they would have told the interloper to go fuck themselves or they’d be next, but I recognized the voice right away and so did they.

  Sidney Lopez.

  “Let him go!”

  “Get out of here Sidney, this is the boys’ bathroom,” Robbie exclaimed.

  The hands on me released me and they all exited the stall, leaving me by myself. I immediately closed and locked the door, flushed the toilet and sat on the edge, placed my face into my hands and began crying in earnest. Fuck it, I didn’t care who heard. I couldn’t stop the crying if I wanted to. I was such a wimp, if I were stronger and bigger I wouldn’t be teased. Maybe if I had the nice designer clothes the other kids had instead of soup kitchen and food bank hand-me-downs. Maybe then I wouldn’t be such a loser… Maybe then people would like me and I’d have a friend…

  “Come on, Sid. We’re just messing around.”

  “You guys think you’re hot shit around here. You’re not. You want to pick on someone, put someone’s head in the toilet, try me.”

  “Sid, you’re being stupid, we’d never –” Chris said.

  “You’re right, you wouldn’t.”

  Sidney Lopez. While the boys who were picking on me were popular, they were nothing compared to her. She was school royalty, the queen bee. The power and sway she had over the kids at our school trumped everyon
e else. What she said went at our school. And in this instance she wanted me free and while they protested with her, I knew I’d been saved.

  “Get out of here. And never touch him again.”

  They murmured their apologies, not to me, but to her. She told them to go fuck themselves. Once they were gone she walked over to the stall I was in and knocked softly on the door. “You can come out now. They’re gone.”

  I was humiliated and the last thing I wanted to do was let Sidney Lopez see me looking like I was, eyes red from crying, streaks from my tears running down my cheeks. But I stood, opened the door and slowly walked out of the stall.

  “They won’t touch you again Trevor, I promise.”

  Even though she promised, I didn’t believe her. She could protect me here in school, yes, but not outside of school. I’d pay for being saved today. Though it didn’t matter, the gratitude I felt towards her was tremendous. At least I’d be left alone at school from now on. I’d have eight hours a day of peace, that was something.

  “Thank you.” I couldn’t look up, I couldn’t look her in the eye.

  “I’m going to take you home, okay?”

  Sidney was from a well-to-do family and she had her own car – a Ford Mustang, a brand new one, she’d been given it during her sweet sixteen birthday party. Not that I’d attended the party, but I’d heard through school gossip and seen the car.

  “It’s okay, I can walk.” I began to walk past her, but she cut in front of me blocking my path. She was notoriously insistent, she never backed down until she got what she wanted. I suspect that was why she was the queen bee at the school, people knew she always got her way and knew it was no use to deny her.

  “I won’t take no for an answer. I’m driving you home.”

  I sighed. “Okay.”

  We walked together in silence down the hallways of the school and out into the parking lot. Lots of people said bye to her, none said it to me. But not being talked to at all was better than being made fun of so silence was a win and a blessing for me.

  “I like your car,” I finally said, breaking the silence as we got in and buckled up.

  “Thanks.”

  I chanced looking up at her and she smiled at me, a big genuine, friendly smile. I returned her smile. It was the first time that day that I felt good. “Thank you for…” My cheeks burned, I couldn’t even finish the sentence, it was too humiliating.

  “No one should be treated like that. But you’re under my protection now.” She took my hand and gave it a squeeze before turning on the engine of the car and shifting it into drive.

  “Why are you doing this for me?” I asked as she drove to the trailer park I lived in.

  “Because no one should be treated bad. It’s not fair. I would have done something sooner. I’d heard people say they were picking on you, but I hadn’t really seen it with my own eyes. But I saw them take your lunch today and then heard you guys in the bathroom.” She shrugged. “So I caught them red-handed. So now I’m able to step in. I don’t like to depend on the truth in gossip.”

  “Thank you.”

  “You don’t have to thank me. Any decent person would do the same thing.”

  “None did.”

  “They’re scared of the guys.” She laughed. “I’m not. I used to kick Robbie’s ass when we were kids. I can do it again.”

  I smiled and looked back up at her. She probably could, she was a tiny fireball. The top of her Mustang was down and her hair whipped around her head and into her face as she drove, but she didn’t seem to notice or mind. For those few minutes, in her car watching her drive me home I was actually happy – something I rarely felt. I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I’d been truly happy. But in those few, brief minutes – fifteen to be exact, as I listened to her chatter on about nothing in particular – I felt happiness.

  “What’s your address?”

  I told her.

  When my trailer came into view, a small two-bedroom mobile home that was falling apart if I were to be honest, I got a sinking feeling in my stomach. This was it. My mother wouldn’t be home, she rarely was, but that was okay. I was usually happier when she wasn’t.

  “This is the one?” she asked, pulling into the little lot.

  “Yeah.” I looked over at her once more as I reached for the door handle. “Thank you. You have no idea what you did meant to me.”

  She shrugged as if standing up to bullies were no big deal. But it was. A really big deal. “No biggie. Like I said. I don’t like seeing people being hurt. It’s not cool.”

  I got out and closed the door. “Thanks anyhow.”

  “Hey.”

  I turned back to her. “Yeah?”

  “If you have any more problems with them, or if you ever need to just talk. You’ll come to me, right?”

  I nodded. “Yeah. Goodbye Sidney. And thanks.”

  “Bye.”

  ~*~*~*~

  Sidney – Twelve Years Ago

  “Ohmygod Sidney, will you please pay attention to me!” I looked up to see my friend Callie frowning at me, wearing yet another dress that she was debating on for the Spring Fling event.

  “I’m sorry,” I murmured.

  “Well, what do you think?”

  This was the seventh dress she’d tried on and they all looked good. To appease her I forced a wide smile on my lips and nodded with enthusiasm. “THAT is the one! It’s amazing, Callie.”

  Truth was, I couldn’t have cared less about the Spring Fling, my mind was on Trevor. I’d been thinking about him since I dropped him off a couple of hours ago. I felt bad for him, really bad. That trailer was in pretty bad shape and having to live with an addict must be horrible. I’d heard rumours that he was beaten lots, but those were just rumours. Even though I was upset the boys teased him about the fact his mom was a prostitute and addict, it was the truth. The abuse was rumours, but what was said about his mom was 100% true.

  I know this because my dad, who happened to be a defense lawyer, took her case pro bono a year or so ago on charges of prostitution and possession. He and my mom – who was also a lawyer – both believed that if a woman wanted to use her body for money and a man wanted to pay for it, then it is their right to do so. They didn’t agree with the drugs, but the drugs weren’t the reason he’d taken the case.

  Callie twirled in the pink princess-style dress and laughed. “It is amazing, isn’t it? Like Cinderella.”

  “It is.” God, I really didn’t care.

  She turned to me and planted her hands on her hips. “So, come on, you need to get a dress too. You haven’t tried anything yet.”

  I clutched my stomach and feigned nausea. “I’m not feeling well, Callie. I don’t know, I think I should go home.”

  Callie’s smile faded. “Ohhh. That sucks.”

  “I know.” I looked up at her and faked a sad face. “I’m sorry. I was so looking forward to this. If I go home can your mom come pick you up?”

  She hesitated, but eventually nodded. “I guess. Maybe we can come back tomorrow and look for your dress, we only have a couple of weeks left you know.”

  “I know.” I stood, walked over to Callie and gave her a hug. “I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you, ’kay?”

  “’Kay.”

  We said our goodbyes and I rushed to my car. I couldn’t get over this odd feeling. No, to say the feeling was odd would be wrong. It was a feeling in the pit of my stomach that something was seriously wrong… Intuition? The way Trevor got out of the car, with hesitation. And the way he said goodbye, with finality. I think you’d really have to be there to understand what I’m trying to say, but it just left me feeling bad.

  I could be just making these things up in my mind, I don’t know. I really didn’t know the guy, not really. The extent of my interactions with Trevor Ward was a nod hello in the hallway. When I really thought about it, Trevor didn’t really have any friends, which made me feel even worse for him. Everyone should have a friend, it wasn’t fair that he didn�
�t. And as I drove to his place, feeling guiltier by the minute for also shunning him all these years, I vowed I’d be his friend. I’d help him any way I could. I had influence in my school, if I told people to be his friend, they’d listen. I’d have to do something about his clothes though. Maybe I could get some of my older brother’s stuff that doesn’t fit him anymore.

  I sighed with relief as I turned into his driveway. Finally, I was there and I have to say I was kinda excited, I couldn’t wait to see his expression when I told him I was going to get him cool clothes and he’d have friends now. I almost felt like Ed McMahon announcing he had won the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes, and in a way what I was going to offer him was the teenager equivalent. Turning off the car, I jogged up to the trailer door, knocked and waited.

  No answer. I tried again. Still nothing. Normally, I’d have driven away, but there was a gnawing feeling in my stomach. I couldn’t shake it. On impulse I tried the knob and it turned in my hand. “Hello,” I called out as I opened the door and stepped inside. “Trevor, are you here?” I proceeded inside, leaving the door open and venturing into what appeared to be the living room. The room was in total disarray and it smelled funny. I couldn’t even describe it – mold and dirt? How could he live here?

  My nose crinkled up, but I proceeded further into the house. I was about to turn back and leave when I heard a low moan coming from down the hallway. I decided to continue on, cautiously. The moan sounded again, behind a closed door.

  “Hello, Trevor?” Turning the handle I slowly inched the door open. “It’s me, Sidney. Can I come in?”

  Silence answered me.

  Opening the door fully I stepped into the room and my hand went immediately to my mouth stifling a scream. Trevor was in a bathtub of pink water, a bloody razor dangling from his fingertips from along the side of the white tub. I was frozen in the spot, not sure what to do.

  “Sid…” My name was raspy, but his speaking my name pulled me from my shock and I raced over to the tub, falling to my knees.