Love & Decay (Season 1): Episode 9

by Rachel Higginson

  “For sure,” I heard myself grimace. Harrison was right. We dealt with Zombie-rot on a daily basis, I didn’t want to have to have something equally as nasty follow me around in the van all day.

  I looked back at Tyler, but her face had gone pale. “I can’t,” she whispered. “I’m a sympathetic puker.”

  “Why’d you have to say that?” King groaned. He put his hand to his stomach and burped.

  Holy hell! The only thing worse than Kane puking, was everybody puking! I looked up at Hendrix but his eyes were hard and distant. Obviously he couldn’t play nurse to Kane- at least not without pressing a pillow over his face or filling his IV with poison.

  Not that we had either of those things.

  Once upon a time I watched too many daytime soaps.

  I caught Haley’s eye and asked her my silent question. She shrugged, willing to go back there to take care of him.

  The problem was, I didn’t want Haley anywhere near his special brand of evil. What if his deranged affection turned on her? What if my selfishness ended with her as the center to Kane’s sadistic world.

  I couldn’t have that.

  I, also, couldn’t make Tyler treat the very man she worked so hard to escape from. Same for Miller.

  And let’s be honest, I could maybe trust Harrison or King to treat him without malicious intent, but that didn’t meant they would do a thorough job. And Kane getting sicker, meant Kane sticking around for longer. I really couldn’t have that.

  I returned my attention to Hendrix and waited for him to lift his eyes and meet mine. I put a hand out and pressed it against his flat, rippling stomach. He glanced down at my fingers as they brushed across his hard muscles. And when his eyes returned to mine, they were- if possible- even harder than before.

  “No,” he said simply.

  And he meant it.

  Apparently, we’d come to the same conclusion.

  “I’m going back there,” I whispered, carefully.

  “No,” Vaughan called from the driver’s seat. “No you’re not.”

  “Stop eavesdropping!” I demanded, meanwhile on the inside I was really impressed with Vaughan’s super-human hearing.

  Although it wasn’t the first time I noticed his beyond-average skill. Those ears were one of the reasons all of us were still alive.

  “Reagan,” Vaughan started and then seemed to think better of it. “Explain it to her, Hendrix. Apparently she forgot that he kidnapped her and then imprisoned her.”

  “I didn’t forget!” I snapped. “But I also wasn’t one of the idiots that decided that bringing him along was a good idea! That was you two. And now we have this great big mess and I’m the only one that can clean it up. So you decide, Vaughan.” I threw my attention back at Hendrix. “Hendrix,” I growled. “You make the call. You brought him here. Are you really going to ask Tyler to take care of him?”

  Kane grunted some kind of derisive, disbelieving noise but no one paid any attention to him. And Vaughan cut right in on Tyler’s defense anyway.

  Despite the initial shock we all felt because Vaughan was actually being nice to Tyler, we still heard him clearly. “Tyler is not going anywhere near the rat bastard. Is that clear? She had to deal with him for years. Her dues are paid in full.”

  Even Tyler looked shocked as she hid her embarrassed-blush behind a curtain of dark, perfectly clean hair.

  How did she do that?

  She even killed Feeders last night! Still, she belonged on a shampoo commercial.

  I couldn’t help but feel a little jealous. I mean, she looked like the final product and if anything I was the before picture- the dry, brittle, split-ends, greasy, oily hair disaster all rolled into one.

  Ok, enough of that. My personal vanity could wait to be dealt with.

  “Haley can go,” Vaughan suggested.

  “You better think carefully before you stick with that solution, brother,” growled Nelson. “Haley’s not going anywhere near that prick.”

  “Nelson,” Haley scolded, sounding perfectly scandalized.

  “No, he’s right, Hales,” I argued. “You better stay up here. Just walk me through it. I’ll be fine.”

  Haley looked like she wanted to argue, but Nelson reached behind him and grabbed her ankle. He tugged on it until she was rolling her eyes and giggling at the same time.

  “Let Reagan go, Haley,” Nelson demanded. “She’s probably the last person he would harm anyway.”

  I wasn’t so sure about that. He had been pretty adamant about punishing me whenever he caught up with me.

  Normally, I would have played that off as the mad ramblings of a crazy person. But he also promised to find me and at the time I laughed that off too.

  Now look. Here he was, in the same van as me. And it didn’t really matter if it was coincidence or careful planning because he was here nonetheless. With us.

  With me.

  And now we had to deal with him.

  Or rather, I had to deal with him.

  “Does my opinion not count for anything?” Hendrix looked about ready to explode, so I put my arms around his waist and leaned my cheek against his wild heartbeat. I felt connected to him with my skin against his warm, firm chest. Even while he vibrated with fury, I relished in the comfort of his living, breathing body so close to mine.

  “You can come with me,” I told him. I didn’t want to go back there by myself either.

  Hendrix and Vaughan searched him before we left Tulsa. Tyler insisted that he kept weapons all over his body and after searching him, I could vouch for that truth. But even while he was weaponless, he still made me so incredibly nervous I started to tremble.

  I didn’t want to go alone. I felt like even Kane’s carefully placed words would be enough to get under my skin. He just unnerved me so very much.

  “Alright,” Hendrix agreed. I knew he would. “But let me finish you up first.”

  Hendrix finished washing my face and hairline and then patted the wound one more time before dressing it with Band-Aids from our original stash. At least it wasn’t deep enough that I needed stitches.

  I gathered my blood-caked, stiff hair into a semi-presentable ponytail-messy-bun-thing and then took a few steadying breaths. I wasn’t sure how I was going to deal with Kane. On one hand, he was hardly dangerous all broken and beat up. On the other, alarm bells were clanging inside my head and my blood felt on fire with warning.

  I felt Vaughan’s gaze hot and angry in the review mirror, but I refused to acknowledge him. This was his whole stupid idea! He shouldn’t be surprised that I was volunteering for this position. He should know me better by now. This was tearing me up inside and I would never make someone else go through this.

  “Reagan, he’s my brother,” Tyler announced when I started gathering everything I would need to help Kane. “At least let me help you.”

  “No,” Vaughan stated before I could accept.

  I rolled my eyes so only Tyler could see and said, “That would be great. I doubt Hendrix will be as careful with Kane as he was with me.”

  Hendrix snorted and Vaughan mumbled curses under his breath. He had to owe Page at least fifty dollars after that inappropriate speech.

  Tyler and I made our way to the back of the van so we could sandwich Kane in and get the job done as quickly as possible. Tyler just swung her body over her seat back and I crawled over Hendrix and worked my way through the jostling aisle while the van moved steadily down the highway. Hendrix followed and shoved King and Miller over so he could sit near the aisle and watch from the row in front of us. This was all very close quarters, so it was a little ridiculous Hendrix moved with us.

  But still, I felt safer with his hovering presence.

  “Alright, Kane,” I started my speech with an authoritative and clinical voice, hoping to set the precedent for how this and every future interaction would go. “I’m going to look you over and see what I can do.”

  He groaned, but didn’t say anything to encourage or dissuade me. I met
Tyler’s eyes for a brief second and then turned my attention to Kane’s body.

  He was so broad that I felt itty bitty next to him. Hendrix towered over me, but he was skinny too. Kane had all the benefits of three solid, filling meals a day and his body and toned muscles showed the advantage of carrying that kind of weight.

  My fingers hovered over Kane, not exactly sure where to start. I felt reluctant to touch his body, but starting with his face seemed too intimate.

  Gah! This was frustrating.

  I shook my head and cleared my throat. I was braver than this. Touching Kane wasn’t going to put some magical passion slave mindset into my head. He was just a man and right now he was suffering. I had a civic duty to tend to him. And then as soon as he was better he could go back to suffering, just in a different place than me.

  I decided to start at his head and work my way, uh, down. I cupped his face in my hands and turned him to face me. He was still slumped over and I had a feeling, just barely conscious. But when my palms touched his rough jawline some energy sparked to life inside of him.

  He looked up at me from under thick, dark lashes and his gray eyes softened. “Hey,” he rumbled throatily.

  Instead of answering him, I reached for a bottle of water and held it to his full lips. He hadn’t shaved in at least a day and short stubble abraded my fingertips. His skin was dirty and bloody, his hair full of dust and grime. But he still held that unnerving exquisiteness.

  Where Hendrix was just the perfect mixture of real man and risky action star; Kane embodied small town football star meets GQ model. He was too pretty, too good-looking for the sinister role he played in this world.

  “You going to take care of me?” he rasped in his thick southern accent.

  “I’m going to make you better so that I can get rid of you,” I amended.

  “Make me better,” Kane echoed thoughtfully.

  My eyes snapped back to his and I watched them dance with mischief. Before I could stick up for myself, Hendrix leaned forward and grabbed Kane’s shirt collar forcing him forward out of my hands.

  “Why don’t you just keep quiet, asshole, and let her get to work. If you talk to her again, we’ll give Reagan her way and drop you off on the side of the road just the way you are.” Hendrix vibrated with anger, his voice a growl of testosterone and rage.

  I put a steadying hand on his forearm- again- and squeezed. He made his point. I didn’t want to give him the impression that I was protecting Kane, but I didn’t want this to escalate either. The van wasn’t big enough for both of their egos if they decided to go at it.

  Not that Kane was exactly in a position to fight back.

  Hendrix looked down at my pale hand resting over his naturally tanned skin and released Kane with enough force to shove him back against the seat. Kane groaned in pain, but it seemed involuntary because his expression hardened and became as equally enraged as Hendrix’s.

  Kane’s gaze dipped to my hand on Hendrix’s arm and I felt Kane’s entire body tense and stiffen next to mine. But he, wisely, stayed quiet.

  I took his face back in my hands and decided that the cut on his cheek was like my head wound, it bled a lot but didn’t need stitches. Hendrix handed me a wet towel, anticipating my need and I set to work, cleaning it, disinfecting it with whiskey that made Kane wince and slathering it with Neosporin before sticking some Band-Aids loosely over it.

  I didn’t really know what I was doing, but this was the method Haley and I had adopted over the past two years. So far, we hadn’t needed more than this.

  Thank God.

  Although the whiskey was a new addition.

  Once Kane’s face was relatively clean, I moved on to his neck. This cut wasn’t as deep as the one on his cheek, so I felt better about it, but it was longer. I frowned looking down at Kane’s torso. Realizing what would have to be done.

  This van was quickly turning into a Chip N’ Dales show.

  “I need you to take off your shirt,” I ordered Kane. My eyes drifted to his left shoulder hanging awkwardly against his body. It was definitely dislocated, if not shattered. He wouldn’t be able to undress himself. He seemed to come to the same conclusion, although he made a half-hearted attempt to use his good arm and tug at the hem of his t-shirt. “Alright, tough guy, I get the idea.” I gave him a stern look that he returned with a lopsided, apologetic grin. “Would you like some meds for the pain?” He nodded. Apparently, he took Hendrix’s warning seriously and wasn’t going to talk to me again.

  I reached into Hendrix’s bag and pulled out two Tylenol and two Advil. My mom would always take this combination for her migraines, so I assumed it was a pretty potent concoction. Her headaches would put her in bed for days and have her puking if she didn’t treat them early enough. That was similar to a motorcycle accident, right?

  I unscrewed the lid from the water bottle and offered Kane the pills. I expected him to take them out of my hand, but, of course, that would have been too easy. He issued a challenging stare and opened his mouth.

  The bastard.

  I sensed Hendrix watching us intently and felt irrationally nervous. I didn’t want to feed Kane. Of course, Hendrix would know that. Still, I didn’t like backing down from a challenge- especially one that Kane was delivering.

  That probably wasn’t a good thing.

  Tyler noticed my internal battle and held out her hand. “Here, I can at least do this part.” She grabbed all four pills and shoved them into Kane’s mouth, then jammed the water bottle against his lips, forcing him to swallow. She wasn’t exactly gentle about it and water sloshed all over his mouth and chest. But the job was finished and he didn’t choke on them…. much.

  Now for the shirt.

  “Have you eaten anything recently?” I asked, hating the sympathy I suddenly felt for him. No, wait. Not sympathy. I just didn’t want him puking up all that precious medicine and destroying our new car smell.

  Kane shook his head but still didn’t try to speak. I looked over my shoulder and tried not to laugh at Haley’s indignant expression. The entire van was watching this whole interaction with barely masked hostility; everybody but Vaughan who I really hoped was watching the road.

  Haley snorted in response to my silent request and the sound seemed extra loud in the quiet of our confined space.

  “Hey,” I pressed her with a raise of my eyebrows. “Some crackers?”

  “Fine,” she grumbled. I turned back to Kane while she rummaged around in the food stash for something to eat.

  “And I need a pair of scissors,” I called back. Then I faced Kane and dealt with his next need. “If you can’t lift your arm, I’m going to have to cut your shirt off, alright?”

  Kane nodded.

  Hendrix handed me scissors and Tyler took over alternating a bite of cracker and a sip of water while I struggled to get the bloody, stiff t-shirt off Kane’s body. It wasn’t exactly baggy to begin with, so while I cut a line from hem to collar the backs of my knuckles dragged along the rigid lines of Kane’s stomach. I felt his muscles flex and contract beneath my skin but kept my attention solely focused on not adding to his injuries.

  I had to cut the sleeves too, but eventually Kane was as bare-chested and half-naked as Hendrix. Part of me, a really bad, objectifying, and dirty part of me wanted to stand them up next to each other and make them pour water over their heads while I watched.

  But, that obviously wasn’t conducive for anything good.

  And besides, Kane wasn’t exactly capable of pulling out the sexy with all his lacerations and that one gimpy arm of his.

  Not that Kane could ever be sexy. Not ever. Even with all his muscles and classic good looks. He was creepy.

  Definitely, definitely creepy.

  I did look over his body carefully though. I had to. I had to see if there was anything else wrong with him. And sure enough, his whole left side was purple, black and green with deep bruises. I lightly ran my fingers along his rib cage. Without his shirt to cover the bruising and ga
shes that covered his torso he appeared to be in even worse shape than I’d originally thought. He flinched at even the gentlest contact with my fingers.

  “Are they broken?” I whispered. If he had broken ribs, he was in trouble. I had no idea what to do with that. And even Haley, our resident genius, was out of her depth with actual broken bones.

  Kane shook his head and finally spoke again, “I’m alright to breathe. So I think they’re just bruised.”

  “What exactly did you do to yourself?” I stared at his ugly contusions and not for the first time, wondered how we were going to fix his shoulder.

  “I ran into a building,” he explained- again. Only this time he added more detail. “Or really the side of a building. I clipped the corner going faster than I should have been.”

  “Running from something?” I guessed.

  “Running to something,” he answered quietly. Luckily, Hendrix was distracted with Miller and missed that.

  I glowered at Kane and went back to picking out rubble from his neck with tweezers. Each time a rock sprung free, he would start to bleed again. This was messy work and I wasn’t exactly qualified for it.

  After his neck was cleaned and bandaged, Tyler helped me give his upper body a sponge bath. Which was awkward in about every way possible. The confined seating, the way we had to be so careful with the water and had limited washcloths available- there were more in our packs, but those were all well used and not exactly clean enough for open wounds.

  Truthfully, these weren’t much better.

  It was uncomfortable doing all of this while everyone watched on, but at least Tyler was back here with me. Having Kane’s sister assist in the middle of this messy business made it feel less intimate…. less low budget porn.

  After we worked for about a half an hour, the only thing left was his thigh and his shoulder- but I would deal with that later. I didn’t exactly know how to go about the gash in his thigh though. I went ahead and assumed it would take more cutting of his clothes… more undressing… more skin to skin contact between the two of us. And to say I wasn’t exactly excited for that was a gross understatement.