Survival Rout

by Ana Mardoll

  "He hurt you." I nod, trying to convey validation and understanding through my own rising panic. Little crumbling sounds rise from the cliff below and Lucas yelps as he scrambles for a firmer hold. He hasn't fallen yet, but we don't have long. "He hurt you, and when we all get out of this alive, I'm going to beat the shit out of him for what he did to you. But you can be better than him. You can save him, Sappho. He's one of us, a captive like the rest of us, and we all promised we'd escape together."

  "He's not one of us." She cuts me off, every line in her body rigid with the strain of hugging the cliff wall. "He's one of you. I'm already better than he is, and I won't give him another chance to hurt me or anyone else ever again."

  "Sappho—!"

  As quick as a thought, her body ripples and begins to stretch. She reaches an extended arm around Reese and grips the stone on the other side of him. He freezes against the wall as a girl as wide and thin as a sheet slips around him, her body caressing him as if she had turned into clothing. Her foot is next, swinging around behind him to anchor into the stone on the other side, then the second hand follows and lastly her remaining foot. She continues on down the ledge after Aniyah and Miyuki, not looking back.

  Reese's troubled eyes meet my own. "We have to do something—" I begin, but stop as I hear a gasp and the plop of a body falling into the thick water. We wait but nothing follows; no thrashing, no shouts, no sign of life whatsoever. Above us Christian is still fighting the Handlers but the sounds are distant now, almost inaudible over the crashing blood in my ears.

  He's dead. Lucas is dead.

  I hadn't liked him and he was no friend of mine. I'd listened to Tony plan his death in the arena and had voiced no objection. But that was when we were angry and he'd just beaten an innocent girl out of spite. I'd calmed down since then and assumed everyone else had as well. Maybe not enough to talk to Lucas again or seek out his company, but enough not to let him die just because he was an asshole.

  I'd been wrong. I had misjudged the intensity of Sappho's anger and now Lucas was dead. I'd heard him hit the water and go under, and I'd been helpless to stop it. The desert heat is suddenly suffocating and mingles with the stench of the river to make my stomach churn. Justin feels like solid stone on my back and I grip the cliffs harder as a wave of nausea hits me. "I'm gonna throw up," I announce, the words slurred.

  "Keoki, we have to go," Reese urges. "Justin needs you to keep going. We can't do anything for Lucas now." On my back, Justin stirs at the sound of his name. I know if he wakes and starts thrashing, we'll both die. I nod at Reese, take a deep breath, and find the next handhold down the line. We pick our way over the ledge, avoiding slick blood and ducking as Christian sends another Handler screeching into the river below.

  Chapter 31

  Aniyah

  I hear the chaos of fighting behind us, but we keep moving forward. Miyuki urges me on from ahead and Sappho herds me from behind. We keep going, because there's nothing else we can do; our weapons are on the other side of the gorge and the three of us never knew how to use them in the first place. Hana and Tony meet us as we reach the end of the ledge, helping us over the last step before readying their weapons.

  "Go," Hana orders. "We'll catch up. Run!"

  It hurts my heart to leave them behind, but the best way we can help the fighters is to get ourselves out of danger so they don't have to protect us. Heather and Handler run ahead towards the tree line, her panicked feet flying as he tries to catch up. Imani and Matías lag behind, helping each other over uneven ground. Miyuki tightens xer protective grip on my arm, and we take off.

  We jog because I've run all I can this cycle—maybe all I'll ever be able to run my entire life—and my spine feels like a column of flame inside me; pain licks out to reach every part of my body. We jog while the sounds of popping air and inhuman screams and splashing water fill our ears, then we hear shouts of retreat and the wails of Handlers closing fast behind us, and I discover I can run after all.

  I risk a look back, turning my head and hoping I don't fall on my face. The rest of our group bears down on us at full speed, gulping air as they sprint and clutching their remaining weapons. Behind them seven Handlers give chase, their elongated limbs stretched to allow them to run on all fours. Chills ripple over my scalp and I try to run faster, but can feel myself nearing my limit.

  We just have to reach that line of trees, I tell myself, beginning to stumble between strides. A hundred steps or a thousand, it doesn't matter if my body shuts down here. My foot catches in the sand and I sprawl forward, hands shooting forward to break my fall as I tumble into the black sand.

  Black sand? I stare at the particles in my hands, too delicate to be any kind of sand at all. It's as magical as everything else out here, but it's the rival magic that lives in the forest ahead and spreads into the sky, warring with the Master's influence and creating clouds. 'When you reach the forest on the other side of the chasm then, if you humans wish deeply enough to cross over into freedom, you will do so.'

  The Shadow Man had said the chasm and mountains and trees were borders, marking the territory of a neighbor; some unknown faery with their own signature style of magic, uniquely different from the pattern stamped on us by the Master. This is the power I've seen as we traveled: the magic in the dark clouds clashing with the Master's blue sky, and here in the ground as black dirt mingling with yellow sand.

  I feel hands on me as Miyuki and Sappho try to pull me to my feet and keep running, but my body is dead weight. "No, no," I gasp, waving them off. "Look! Look at the Handlers." The creatures have halted in their chase and pace the ground near the outermost tendrils of black soil. "They won't follow us here. We're safe."

  I flop back, cramming air into my lungs. We need to get to the trees, but my body is in no condition to run another step. The others catch up with us and I hear the bark of orders and a babble of confused explanations, but the chaos washes over me. Nothing can penetrate my pain, not even the familiar fear as Handler draws towards us. Heather trots ahead of him, ignoring her bleeding scrapes.

  Hana is doubled over, her hands on her knees as she pants for breath. "Why can't they run on the dirt?"

  Handler answers, "This territory is in dispute. If the Master's agents cross over, it would be a declaration of war."

  Chloe narrows her eyes at him. "How do you know? You said you'd never been out here."

  "I understand their cries," he murmurs, sinking to his knees to rest. "I hear the orders they call to each other. They're instructed to wait and see what we do." As he speaks, the other Handlers settle into the yellow sand, lying flat on their pale stomachs and watching us with empty, unblinking eyes.

  "Then we're safe?" Imani asks, a kernel of hope in her gentle voice. "We have time to rest and then just... stroll into the forest?"

  Handler hesitates, reluctant to crush her optimism. "They may give chase if we continue moving in that direction. The Master requires fodder for his parent. A war might cost him the remaining handlers, or he might win and regain his stable of fighters and prizes. He must consider the odds of the gamble."

  Matías leans against his cane and wipes sweat from his brow. "So we have a short time, but not a clear shot. Who is injured? Now's the chance to bandage up." Almost none of us is unbloodied, yet no one answers. He pauses for a moment and his expression turns somber. "Just the one fatality? Lucas... fell?"

  Keoki's hands are working on the strips of cloth lashed around his shoulders and waist; they are tearing in places and pull painfully against his skin. Tony circles around behind him and together they lower Justin to the ground, checking that he's still breathing. Keoki straightens and looks directly at Sappho.

  "Lucas fell," he repeats, echoing Matías' question. "But we could have saved him."

  Hana narrows her eyes and moves between him and Sappho. "Do you have a point?"

  Keoki seems stung by her protective stance, and maybe a little offended. He displays his palms outward in a peaceful gesture. "Look, I�
�� I know he hurt her. Obviously." His eyes find the bruise that still blooms on her face, and the marks on her arms and legs that blend into her colorful tattoos. "But he was one of us. A captive, like the rest of us. We don't leave each other behind. Not if they're wounded, not even if they're a jerk. If we turn this into a free-for-all to settle old grudges, we'll be caught and then we all die."

  Sappho spits at the ground. "He was one of you. Not one of us."

  "We're all in this together!" His words ring out over the field, and a flock of birds rise from the trees ahead. Embarrassment flits over his face and he lowers his voice. "Why does it matter if he was a boy or a girl or whatever? We're all captives. We've all done stuff we're not proud of or happy about. I'm not saying he was right to hurt you, of course that was wrong; but he was still one of us."

  Miyuki's hand tightens on my arm and xie opens xer mouth to speak but Hana is already stalking forward, shoving her face up into his. She doesn't shout, but each perfectly enunciated word is like a slap. "You think we all had the same captivity back there? You think because you fought in the arena that you know anything about what we went through? You only had to face monsters. We had to face you. All of you."

  He doesn't stumble back from her, but I see the hurt in his eyes. "I... I asked," he whispers, his voice so low I have to strain to hear him. His eyes seek out Miyuki. "I never did anything without asking. And I tried to make it feel good when a girl said yes." He doesn't glance at me when he says this, avoiding my eyes as he looks anywhere but in my direction.

  "We still didn't have the choices you had," Chloe says, her face as foreboding as the dark clouds roiling above us. "No, not even when you guys asked. You don't know what it's like, sleeping with someone who can have you killed with a word. You can't know what kind of pressure that puts on you."

  "Or strung out for a beating," Sappho adds through clenched teeth.

  "Or thrown into solitary without food or water," Heather chimes in, watching the stationary Handlers on the horizon as she picks at her bleeding fingers. "Really, the punishments were so creative. Remember when they drowned Peridot in our pool because a boy complained about her crying? Left her body in there for half a dozen cycles so we could watch it bloat up. Whatever happened to him? Chloe broke his leg, I think?"

  "I did it," Hana says, her voice cold. She doesn't look away from Keoki. "Broke his knee. Right before a match, too. Never complained about another girl again."

  Keoki flinches, turning his head away to gaze at the ground. "Lucas didn't do that, though," he says. His pleading voice is so low I have to strain to hear. "Lucas didn't get you punished or killed. He lost his temper and took it out on you instead of on me."

  Imani sits on the other side of me, knees tucked under her chin. "No," she whispers. "Lucas beat girls when he was frustrated, which was pretty much all the time. So we had to decide—when we even had a chance to decide—whether to send him Hana or Heather. Hana would heal faster, but we were afraid she'd lose her temper and hit back. Which meant Heather got to go, and Sappho and I got to patch her up each time."

  She looks up, her eyes wet with unshed tears. "I'm sure he was nice enough to you, Keoki, but he treated us differently. Believe me or don't, but it's true."

  Miyuki's eyes are narrowed, glaring at Keoki while he stares at his feet. "He would have hurt Aniyah!" xie explodes. "If not at Auction, then later. Just to get to you. You can't tell me you don't care about that! If you don't believe us, ask your friend," xie adds, nodding xer chin in Tony's direction. He meets xer gaze without hesitation. "Are you even remotely surprised by any of this?"

  Tony shakes his head, dark hair brushing his eyes. "Not in the least." He looks at Keoki, his expression softening. "And maybe if everyone was safe and there weren't Handlers crawling all over the cliff and the footing was decent and Sappho was as strong as she is stretchy—maybe if all that was the case, I'd spare a lick of regret for how it went down. As it is... I don't." He shrugs and looks away, peering off into the distant forest.

  I look around the faces of the five boys who are still alive and conscious. Tony isn't the only one who looks unconcerned; Christian gives a similar shrug when Keoki glances his way, and seems far more interested in his failing efforts to catch Chloe's eye. Reese, the boy who helped me across the ledge, doesn't meet Keoki's gaze. Only Matías looks as stung as Keoki, but he says nothing and seems lost in his own regrets.

  "We're going to take a rest break," Hana declares, turning her back on the boys and stalking to where we sit in a clump on the ground. "Girls over here and boys over there. We're allowed a breather while we get our wounded in order. Eat and drink whatever didn't get left on the other side of the chasm." Keoki opens his mouth, a doubtful frown flickering over his face, but she shuts him down. "We're as free as you out here. You don't have to agree with our decisions, but you will respect us."

  She throws herself on the ground next to us and begins stretching her legs, rubbing out the kinks before we start running again. Just the idea of getting up from this spot makes me want to roll over and die, but Miyuki runs xer hands over me and magic loosens my muscles from their angry clench. Sappho squats on the ground nearby, her head buried in her arms and her shoulders trembling; Heather sits alongside and drapes an arm over her in silent commiseration. Chloe unslings the water she's been hauling and passes around the half-empty vessels for us to drain.

  I hear the tread of footsteps and open my eyes to see Reese approaching. He looks sheepish, one hand playing with a silver bracelet on his wrist. He meets my gaze with a little wincing smile, but doesn't slow his pace as expectant heads turn towards him.

  Hana doesn't look up at the intrusion, continuing her stretches. "I said: only girls over here."

  He clears his throat and nods, pushing a long strand of hair behind his ear. "Yeah, I—" He smiles, tension visible in his eyes. "That's why I came over. Uh. Surprise?"

  Hana looks up at him with open exasperation. "I'm not in the mood for games, Reese," she says in a tight voice. "You're nice and you've got a decent left hook worth developing, but you're not a girl."

  He stands his ground, staring at the bracelet on his wrist that he continues to fiddle with. "I mean. How can you be so sure, Hana?" he asks, striking a reasonable tone. "Did you ever ask me?"

  Beside me, Miyuki sits up so swiftly you'd think cold water had been dumped on xer. Hana doesn't notice. "You were placed with the fighters. You're a boy. That's the rule."

  Reese nods at this. "I'm a good fighter," he agrees. "But, I mean, so are you." He looks at Chloe who watches him with one hand on her hip, her expression skeptical. "And you. Doesn't mean you're not girls, right? And it doesn't mean the Master knew anything when he placed you."

  Imani looks up, curiosity flickering over her burned features. "Why would you want to be a girl? Arena deaths are faster than what we have to look forward to. If the Master made a mistake with you, why would you want to join us?" She laughs, cradling her wounded hand. "Hana's wanted to fight in the arena since she was brought here. She'd trade places with you in a heartbeat. Most of us would."

  He shakes his head, fumbling with his wrist; I lean on my elbows and catch the letters of his name in silver. "It's not about what I want to do. It's about who I am. Yeah, I'd rather fight than be given to a bunch of guys as a Prize! I can't think how awful it's been for you. But imagine the Master screwed up and placed you with the guys, only they didn't know. Imagine they thought you were one of them and you couldn't tell them otherwise. Can you believe how relieved you'd be to get out of there? Living your life in hiding, knowing if they figured you out then guys like Lucas would..."

  Reese's voice trails away under Hana's baffled gaze. Miyuki's hand has stilled on my back and xer breath is almost inaudible. "I believe you," xie murmurs, looking up from where xie sits. "And that does sound like the most miserable existence in the world." Xie turns xer head to look at Hana, who stares back in surprise.

  "Emma?"

  "I believe her," Miyuki
repeats simply, shrugging xer shoulders. "I do."

  Tears leap into Reese's eyes, his—no, her—expression crumpling at xer declaration. "Does that mean I can stay over here with you?"

  Sappho doesn't raise her head, but unfolds one arm and reaches up. She grabs Reese by the wrist and hauls her down to sit on the ground with her and Heather, drawing her into the silent cuddle-pile they've formed there. "Nobody's going to hurt you," she whispers, her shoulders still trembling as she wraps a tattooed arm around the other girl. "We're not going back. Those boys won't touch us again, I promise."

  Miyuki gives a little snort at this vow, but there's a smile on xer face as xie lies on the ground next to me. "Unless we want them to," xie whispers, watching me with amused eyes from behind xer glasses.

  "Do you want them to?" I ask, raising an eyebrow at xer.

  "Not in the slightest," xie replies instantly, xer smile widening. "I was speaking for you, Aniyah. How are you doing, by the way? Ready to stand up? I think our break may be almost over."

  I groan, shaking my head and letting my hair drag over the ground. "Please don't make me get up ever again? We'll just stay here in neutral territory forever, and dig up food from the ground. That's where food comes from, doesn't it?"

  "Hmm. I have a vague recollection—" Xie stops mid-sentence, a frown creeping over xer face. "Do you hear that?"

  From the line of trees comes the sound of beating wings: birds are rising, as they did before when Keoki raised his voice. But we've been quiet out here, with no reason for the animals to spook from their rest. I drag myself to a sitting position while the others do the same, sitting or standing to look at the rising flock.

  "Aniyah?" Keoki is at my side, helping me up with his gentle hands. "Can you see anything? Any magic?"

  I lean against him, absurdly grateful for his strength; I really don't know if I'm going to be able to stay upright for much longer after all the running I've been doing. I peer forward, one hand against my forehead to shade my eyes from the remnants of sun that filter through the cloud cover.