How to Be a Perfect Girl

by Mary Williams

  Val tried to wait out the rest of the morning in solitude, but without much luck; several boys seemed intent on introducing themselves to her. The two twins came up after Kennedy brought the donuts, “Hi, I’m Davis,” the slightly taller one held out his hand, “And this is my brother Rodney.”

  “Nice to meet you,” Val smiled, taking his hand weakly, “So are you two twins? You look really similar.”

  “We do?” Davis faked a surprised look, “Whoa, we do! I guess we really are twins!” He laughed.

  “Oh, cool.”

  “I have a question for you,” Rodney swallowed a huge bite of donut before continuing, “Do you not like donuts or something?”

  “Huh?” Val threw a confused look at the pair before grimacing; she could see Dylan approaching, with his too-familiar devil’s smile.

  “Well, why didn’t you grab a donut? Or some soda?” Rodney asked.

  “Cause—cause—“ Val’s attention was focused on Dylan; she was trying to will him to turn around and go somewhere else. “Cause they’re really fattening.”

  “Well, yeah, but you don’t look like you need to worry about getting fat—“

  “Oh, you don’t know Valentina, Rods,” Dylan joined the conversation, “Her enormous proboscis traps food particles from the air and she subsists on those. Why, I bet she’s enjoying your donut just as much as you.”

  “I don’t get it,” Davis fixed Dylan with a strange look, “Enormous pro—bis—sis?”

  “Her long nose,” Dylan clarified.

  “But I don’t think she has a long nose,” Davis’ cheeks flushed, “It’s just about perfect.”

  “You’ll have to forgive my friend,” Dylan addressed Val, “He’s really into the huge nose look.”

  Before Val could respond, Pastor Kennedy announced, “The adults’ service is over now, so if you wanna go meet up with your parents you’re free to go.” Val took the opportunity to avoid more of Dylan’s teasing; she waved goodbye to Davis, and ducked under Dylan’s arm. Pastor Kennedy smiled at her as she made her way to the stairs, “Have a blessed day.”

  “Uh, thanks. You too,” Val ascended the stairs quickly; instead of trying to find her parents among the herd milling in the main hall, she simply walked to their car and waited there. In a few minutes, Dad appeared with Mom and they exchanged stories of their first days at the new church.

  “We were hardly even the last ones there,” Mom said, “There was this one woman who came in halfway through—she didn’t even apologize or anything, just sat down cool as you please.”

  Dad laughed, “And that wasn’t the best part. When we were all singing and that one man in the front who had a little too much Communion wine started belting out the hymns as loud as he could—that’s what I love about church. You never know what’s going to happen.”

  It wasn’t until they were home that it occurred to either of Val’s parents that she might want to talk about her morning; Mom asked how it had been while they were pulling into the driveway, at which point there was only time for Val to summarize it as “ok”.

  Val went to her room to change; she chose the first pair of pants her eyes landed on, and paired them with a form hugging black shirt. “Hey Val?” Mom called from outside her door.

  “Yeah?”

  “Your father and I are going to a symposium in a few minutes. It’s a lunch-to-dinner type of thing, so we probably won’t be back till late.” Mom sounded almost like she regretted leaving her daughter alone.

  “Oh, that sounds fun,” Val replied sarcastically as she pulled the shirt on and cracked her neck. It felt nice to be out of that dress.

  “Loads of fun,” Val couldn’t tell if Mom was being sincere or not. “Anyway, I just wanted to let you know, so that you don’t worry about us.”

  Val opened her door; “Alright, I won’t worry.” It wasn’t the first time her parents had left her alone; she was quite good at fending for herself, especially since her charge card had a ten-thousand dollar limit.

  Mom nodded; she threw her arms around Val, “I love you.” Mom could be weird sometimes. She waved to Val as Dad held the front door open; he smiled and winked at Val as Mom wobbled on painful heels down the stairs. A few more seconds and the door was shutting behind them; Val sighed. She had no idea how she was going to spend the rest of her day, seeing as to how she’d already finished her homework.

  An idea struck her. “Hey,” she texted Keenan, “You wanna come hang out at my house? Parents are out.”

  “Sure!” Keenan replied within a minute, “You want me to bring lunch?”

  Val thought about it for a moment; she had plenty of food in her fridge, but takeout or something would be nice. “Yes please. I’ll pay you back when you get here.”

  “No need. You’re my gf after all. Does Chinese sound good?”

  Val frowned; Chinese for lunch definitely didn’t sound good, but she didn’t want to seem picky. “Sure,” she texted back.

  “Great! A and I will be there in a few.” It was obvious ‘A’ meant Alex. Val groaned; she’d been hoping to hang out with Keenan, and only Keenan. She was starting to feel like she was really dating the pair of them; at any rate, they had yet to go on a date he wasn’t a part of.

  The doorbell rang. Val rose from the chair she’d settled into, and reached the door as Keenan rang the bell again; she opened it, “Hey, how are you?”

  “I’m good,” Keenan smiled. He held up plastic bag, “We brought the food.”

  “Good,” Val pointed toward the kitchen, “I was thinking we could just eat in there.”

  “Sounds good to me. I’ll go set this down.” Keenan headed to the kitchen; Alex followed him in.

  “Is Daddy home?” Alex asked. Val shook her head. “Awesome! We can do whatever we want then!”

  “Uh, I guess—“ Val didn’t know what Alex was planning.

  Alex nodded as Val closed the door behind him and they made their way to where Keenan was opening the boxes of Chinese food, “By the way, you look beautiful.” He looked her up and down to emphasize the statement.

  Val blushed, “Thank you. Keenan didn’t notice.” She tried to make it sound like a joke.

  Keenan looked up from a medium-sized box of chow mein, “Oh, yeah. Sorry. You look great.”

  “Doesn’t she?” Alex batted his eyelashes at Val, laughing, “I think she looks—edible.”

  Val giggled, “Edible? You want to eat me? What are you, a cannibal?”

  “You know what I meant,” Alex winked at her, “I only want to eat certain parts of you.” He paused for a moment while Val processed the joke. “Like your brains,” he finished; they all laughed.

  “Oh, so you’re a zombie. So much better.” Val showed Alex and Keenan where the plates and utensils were, and they each helped themselves to some of the food.

  “How’s your Sunday been?” Keenan asked, “Alex and I spent the whole morning trying to come up with viable excuses for getting out of classes at a moment’s notice.”

  “It was—“Val searched for the right word, “—it was strange. I went to church, and had to play tag. And Dylan was there—“ Val remembered the question she wanted to ask Alex, “—by the way, what happened last year?”

  “Why were you crying when we picked you up?” Alex echoed his friend’s question-for-a-question from earlier that week.

  Val sighed; there was no point in hiding it. “I’ll answer your question if you answer mine,” she said.

  “Deal,” the boys both leaned forward, expecting a good story.

  “My best friend for a decade dumped me,” Val admitted; it seemed like such a small thing when summarized that way, but she figured that was the best way to phrase it.

  “No way!” Keenan looked genuinely concerned, “Why?”

  “Because of—this,” Val gestured to the house around them.

  “Because of your house?”

  “Well, not just the house. She said that it was like, cause I was always luckier than her. Like I do
n’t even think it was anything I did.” Even thinking about last Wednesday was bringing tears to her eyes, “Your turn.”

  Keenan turned to Alex, who shrugged before replying. “I got someone kicked out of the school.”

  “But—why would that frighten Dylan?” Val asked.

  “Because it was his best friend who Alex got kicked out,” Keenan answered, “That’s probably why he was giving you shit. He knows you’re friends with Alex.”

  “Hold on,” Val was confused, “How would he know that?”

  “Palm Lake’s not exactly a huge school. I’m sure he saw you two talking at some point and made the connection—it might not even be that, though. Could be he likes you, and making fun of you is his screwed up way of showing it.”

  Val coughed; she hated the whole ‘he hit you, so he must like you’ idea. It was a philosophy her parents espoused, even though she’d never bought into it; abuse just wasn’t an acceptable way of showing affection in her mind. “How’d you get Dylan’s friend kicked out?” she asked.

  “Oh, well that’s a long story. Let’s just say that Miro was involved,” Alex replied mischievously. “Look guys, I actually have to go. You two will be alright without me?”

  Yes! Val schooled her initial response, “Oh, that’s too bad. But yeah, I think we’ll survive without a chaperone.” Keenan nodded, giving his friend a good-natured shove towards the door.

  “Text me when you’re ready to go,” Alex called as he opened the front door, “And don’t forget to tell your girlfriend how beautiful she is!”

  “I won’t!” Keenan called back; he turned to Val, “You do look amazing, you know.”

  “Thank you,” Val looked at her plate, “And thanks for lunch, by the way.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  “You wanna go--?” Val let the sentence trail off while she thought of something to suggest, “You wanna go down to my basement and watch a movie? We have Netflix.”

  “Sure,” Keenan smiled, “I’m game for anything, as long as I’m doing it with you.”

  “Awh,” Val blushed, “That’s a great line.”

  “It’s not just a line. I really mean it.”

  “Well in that case—“ Val leaned closer, “I’m gonna make you put on one of my dresses and go to the mall.”

  Keenan’s eyes widened in alarm, “What?”

  Val chortled as she cleared their plates from the table, “Just kidding.”

  “Thank God. You had me worried for a second there.”

  “I just wanted to see what your reaction would be,” Val winked. “Come on; let’s go find something to watch.”

  “Sounds good to me,” Keenan replied as Val took his hand. She led the way to the main room of her family’s basement, where a fifty-inch tv stood in pride of place. A lava-colored couch sat twenty-five feet away; the perfect viewing distance, according to Dad.

  “So, what do you wanna watch?” Val asked as they plopped down on the sofa.

  “I don’t know.” Keenan smiled, “Are there any new comedies out?”

  “Not that I know of,” Val flicked through the queue, “Oh, hey! The Breakfast Club!”

  “The Breakfast Club? Is that a comedy?”

  “No, it’s—have you never seen it?”

  Keenan shook his head, “Nope. It looks old.”

  “It’s not that old,” Val defended, “Plus it’s like the best movie ever made. Ok, it’s settled; that’s what we’re watching.” She selected the movie and started it.

  “So what’s this about?” Keenan asked as he snaked an arm over Valentina’s shoulder.

  “You’ll see,” she snuggled up against him.

  An hour and a half later, the movie finished. Val sniffled; she reached a hand up to wipe her eyes.

  “Are you crying?” Keenan seemed genuinely concerned.

  “Yeah,” Val admitted, “It’s just so—“

  “So—what? It’s a happy ending; they all understand each other now.”

  “I know,” Val looked up at Keenan, “But nothing’s really changed. I dunno, it just seems kind of sad.”

  Keenan smiled, “I think we need to cheer you up. How about some ice cream?”

  “We don’t have any. We do have frozen yogurt though.”

  “Just as good. You wanna get it or do you want me to?”

  “I’ll get it,” Val left her spot on the couch, “Do you want cookies and cream or strawberry?”

  “Cookies and cream, please.”

  “Ok, I’ll go get it,” Val started up the stairs.

  “Hey Val,” she stopped. Keenan grinned, “Would it be wrong to say I like the way your butt looks in those jeans?”

  “Yes,” Val stuck her tongue out at him, “But I’ll take it as a compliment.” She continued up the stairs. The frozen yogurt was in their kitchen fridge, in a drawer kept at just above freezing, so it was always soft. She spooned out a bowl’s worth of cookies and cream, and grabbed a couple of spoons before replacing the frozen yogurt and heading back to the basement.

  Keenan had started playing with the pool table; it had its own room in Val’s basement even though her family never used it. The doors and walls were made of glass, making it feel like part of the living room, even though technically it wasn’t. Val opened the door and set the bowl on one corner.

  “Hey!” Keenan stood up, pointing his pool cue at Val like a poker, “How can I sink the eight ball when your frozen yogurt’s in the way?”

  “Our frozen yogurt,” Val corrected, “And you’re not supposed to sink the eight ball until all the others are in.” She laughed.

  “Oh. Well—“ Keenan shrugged, “I was just passing time anyway.”

  “You wanna play a game?” Val asked.

  “Sure. I haven’t played pool since I was a little kid.”

  “Me either,” Val smiled. “So first, I need to find somewhere for this to go,” she looked around for a place to set the bowl; there was nowhere in the room for it to sit that wouldn’t interfere with their game. She settled for an empty space on the television’s entertainment stand.

  “Alright, so do you know how to set it up?” Val asked, returning to the pool room.

  “Kinda,” Keenan frowned, “I use this thing, right?” he pointed to the plastic triangle on the wall.

  Val laughed, “Yes. Here, let me do it.” She grabbed the triangle and maneuvered the balls to the correct side of the table. “You wanna break?”

  “Ladies first.”

  Val grinned, “Alright then.” She replaced the triangle and retrieved a pool cue. “Fair warning, I’m horrible at this.”

  Keenan won the first game, when Val accidentally hit the eight ball into one of the pockets. They played another, and another; the sun was starting to set and Val’s stomach growled.

  “Do you wanna get some dinner?” Keenan asked, “I should probably get home soon, but I could stay for like another half hour if you wanted me to.”

  Val put away her pool cue and picked up the completely melted bowl of frozen yogurt on their way up the stairs; they’d forgotten about it in the midst of their pool playing. “That’s alright,” she said, “I’ll probably just have some leftovers or something. If you want to go home—“ They stopped in the front entryway.

  Keenan nodded, “Ok, I’ll check with Alex to see if he can give me a ride.” He sent a text.

  Val sighed, “I can’t wait till get our own licenses—and cars.”

  Keenan’s phone vibrated; he pulled it out. “I know,” he said as he typed a response.

  “So—“ Val stared at the hallway floor awkwardly. She felt like Keenan was more involved in his text conversation than in the conversation with her.

  “Yeah?”

  Val looked up at Keenan, “Is Alex going to be able to pick you up?”

  Keenan’s phone buzzed again; he checked it. “Yeah. He says he should be here in fifteen. What do you want to do until then?”

  Val smiled; she could think of a perfect way to spend the fifteen
minutes. She just had to plant the idea in Keenan’s mind too. Val wrapped his arms around his neck and batted her eyelashes, “I had a great time today. Thanks for coming over.”

  Keenan didn’t seem to get the hint, “Of course. Any time.”

  Maybe I need to be more forward, “You know, we haven’t had our first kiss yet. And I mean like, I don’t even know if we can call ourselves a couple until we do that.” Val laughed in an attempt to break the mounting tension.

  “Oh,” Keenan locked eyes with Val. “So do you want to--?”

  “Only if you do.” Val was almost frustrated by Keenan’s reticence; do I have to initiate this myself? She wondered. Before she could worry too much, Keenan leaned in and pecked her on the lips. He pulled away quickly.

  “You call that a kiss?” Val meant it as a joke, but as she said it she realized it sounded more like an accusation. She bridged the gap between them and gave him a kiss of her own; as she pressed her lips against his and explored Keenan’s mouth with her tongue, he gradually returned the gesture. They maintained the kiss for what felt like a blissful lifetime, until Alex’s cough from the doorway alerted them to his presence.

  “Well aren’t you two quite the happy couple!” he joked, “I take it Keenan took my advice then?’

  “What advice was that?” Keenan asked; he slipped an arm around Val’s waist. It felt nice, like he was protecting her somehow.

  “To tell her how beautiful she is,” Alex winked, “It’s a trick that works every time.”

  “Trick?” Val frowned indignantly, “You were tricking me?”

  “No,” Keenan assured, “No. I meant what I said, and I’d never try to trick you.”

  “Well then,” Val returned his peck from earlier, “See you tomorrow.”

  “See you tomorrow!” Keenan gave her one last squeeze before leaving with Alex. Val thought Alex looked almost uncomfortable to see them displaying their affection before him; maybe I’m reading too much into nothing.