Damaged

by R. R. Banks

  I gasped and jumped back from Micah involuntarily. There was a moment of pitch blackness before my eyes became accustomed to the small amount of light that was still coming through the thick curtains that hung over the windows. Micah muttered a profanity and stood, gently pushing me out of the way so that he could go to the window and open the curtains. The light from outside had the almost searing brightness that came from reflecting off of the snow and I squinted, turning away from it to give my eyes a chance to adjust yet again.

  "Shit," Micah said. "I was afraid that this was going to happen."

  "Does this happen very much?" I asked.

  "No," he said. "But the storm was so severe so quickly that I knew there was a possibility. Give me a minute, I have emergency lanterns around here somewhere. I keep them in almost every room, so I don't have to search around for them if this happens."

  I could hear Scout whimpering and I looked around for him.

  "Is he alright?"

  "He's fine," Micah said. "He's just frightened. He'll go curl up around the wood stove and hide there until the lights come back on."

  I watched as Micah moved around the library, trying to remember where he had stashed the lanterns. The way that he was searching made me think that the lanterns weren't something that he had initially thought of when coming to live in the lodge. Instead, he probably purchased them as a response to the last time that the power went out. He finally found two lanterns and brought them over to the table, putting them beside the game board. Despite the intensity of the sunlight that was coming through the windows, I knew that the sun would be setting soon and very quickly the house would get dark.

  "There's a generator for the refrigerator and freezers that automatically turns on," he said. "But I'll have to go activate the one for the lights."

  "Don't go out there," I told him. "If the power went out, that means that the storm is getting worse and I don't want you outside."

  "It's fine," he said. "I only have to go a short distance."

  I shook my head.

  "I don't want you to go outside. There's plenty of light right now. We will be fine."

  "The sun will be down in less than an hour," he said.

  "Then we will be fine in the dark."

  My heart pounded slightly in my chest as I said it, but I tried not to let my expression show what I was feeling. I could still taste his kiss on my lips and feel his fingers on my hips. Almost as though it were in response to what we had said, the light coming in through the window started to fade. Micah turned on one of the lanterns and gestured toward the Clue board.

  "Do you want to keep playing?" he asked.

  I nodded. I didn't really know what I wanted, or what I should want. I had no memories of ever feeling this way before, and something told me that even if I could remember every single second that I had lived, I would know that this was different. I would know that I had never experienced what coursed through me every time that I looked at Micah and that was only getting stronger and more irresistible with every passing second. The heat between us was growing. It was obvious, hanging in the air around us and filling the space until it was almost as though I could feel each breath streaming out of my lungs and entering his, only to be returned to me. But I didn't know what to do with those thoughts or feelings. I didn't know how to respond or even what would happen if I did allow myself to give into the desires that filled me. I didn't want to play, but the hesitation and nervousness were enough to bring me to sit back at the table and pick up the die, after moving my plate.

  “I think it was Miss White in the drawing room with the rope.”

  “Seriously?” Micah asked.

  I thought that Micah was upset that I had started to play again, but then realized that he was sifting through the cards in his hand. He pulled a card from his deck and flashed it at me. I let out a sigh.

  “Stop showing me the damn rope!” I laughed.

  It was at least the fifth time that he had shown me that particular card and we were making almost no progress in the game.

  “Well, stop choosing it as your weapon.”

  We had each taken two more turns when I stared out over the board and sighed. The sun was completely set, leaving only the lanterns to illuminate the board. It gave a decidedly eerie touch to the game, but I could barely concentrate on the stalemated mystery.

  “I feel like we’re going around in circles here,” Micah said in response to my obvious frustration. “One of us should have figured it out by now. I don’t really remember games running on like this when I was a kid.”

  “Maybe playing with just two players wasn’t the best idea,” I admitted.

  “Maybe having an imaginary player that has a bunch of cards that we don’t get to see isn’t the best idea,” he said.

  I nodded.

  “Valid.”

  There was a quiet moment and I looked up to meet Micah's eyes. The tension that had been steadily building between us had only been slightly lessened by the kiss and now it surged forward until I felt like my chest was going to burst with the pounding of my heart.

  “Maybe I’ll take one more turn,” Micah said.

  His voice had taken on a slow, deep tone that sounded like velvet and I felt my skin shiver. Micah stood and walked around the table so that he was behind me. He got down on his knees and pressed his body to the back of my chair as he reached around me. I nodded, and Micah took the die from my hand, his fingertips lingering as they ran along my palm. His mouth brushed along the side of my neck as he rolled the die and moved his game piece to a corner of the board that didn’t have a room.

  “I think that it was Professor Plum in the bedroom with…” he reached across the gameboard and picked up the red game piece. He dropped it in place beside his own purple piece, “you.”

  I turned my head and immediately Micah's mouth captured mine. Our kiss was instantly deep and seeking, pushing through what we had discovered the first time that our mouths met toward the powerful, aching potential that waited just beyond. I climbed to my feet and Micah took both of my hands, pulling me closer to him. He wrapped his arms tightly around my waist as I clutched either side of his face. Micah plunged his tongue into my mouth. When our lips parted, we moved simultaneously toward the door to the library. Micah snatched the lit lantern from the table as we went, providing just enough light for us to follow as we stepped out into the hallway. I stepped out first and started down the passage toward my bedroom. After walking a few feet, I felt Micah grab the back of my shirt and pull me so that he could push my back against the wall and crush his mouth onto mine again.

  We kissed passionately for a few seconds and then Micah pulled away from me, continuing on his way down the hallway. I followed, suddenly mimicking Micah's action by grasping his wrist and turning him around. He complied with my gesture, but immediately took control again, taking my hand so that he could press me to the opposite wall. He reached down and interlaced his fingers with mine, lifting my arms so that he could hold them against the wall on either side of my head.

  I leaned forward to touch my mouth to the side of Micah's neck and kissed along the tight band of muscle there, enjoying the way that his pulse felt beneath my lips as it quickened and drummed against his smooth, warm skin. Micah moaned softly at the kiss and then turned his head, using his forehead to push my head back against the wall. He took over my gesture now, kissing his way along my neck and down to the neckline of my shirt where he ran his tongue across my skin. He suddenly released me, and we started down the hallway again, our steps quickening as we turned and wound our way through the massive lodge toward my bedroom. We were nearly there when he turned and took me by the front of the shirt with both hands, yanking me up against his body and turning so that I was pressed against the wall again, his body enveloping mine as he pushed me back with the weight from his shoulders to his thighs. His hips nudged against mine and I gasped as I felt the hardening bulge at the front his pants. I could feel his tongue come out to glide
along my collarbone and then dip down into the soft hollow at the base of my throat. I tilted my head back to give him greater access to my skin.

  After several seconds Micah pushed back off of me and took me by the hand, pulling me away from the direction of the bedroom where I had been sleeping and toward another part of the house. We made it to a set of steps that led up and we started up them. Micah turned and sat on one of the steps, pulling me forward until I straddled his hips. He pressed me down onto him, kissing me until I felt breathless and reaching for the bottom of my shirt. I released the grip that I had around his neck to allow him to peel my shirt off and toss it to the side. He wrapped one arm tightly around my waist and used the other hand to grasp the back of my head, leading me to lean back so that he could press his face into my breasts. His tongue slipped out again and I felt the same intoxicating feeling that I had the night before. I gasped as his tongue swept between my breasts and then beneath one cup to flicker across my nipple. My hips rocked against his involuntarily and I heard Micah groan, grabbing me by my butt to lift me off of his lap so that he could stand. He started up the steps again and I followed him.

  As soon as we stepped through a heavy wooden door into a massive bedroom, Micah turned and gathered me into his arms again. I knew that we were on an inevitable path, one that we had started on from the moment that I first saw Micah, and the nervousness started to creep into the edges of my mind again. Micah seemed to sense it and pulled back just enough to look into my face.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked.

  I held Micah closer to me in an effort to reassure him.

  “It's just…" I said.

  “It’s just what?” he asked.

  I hesitated for a moment. I was unsure of what to say, but I knew that I had to say something.

  “I don't know if I've ever done this before. I can't remember being touched by anyone."

  Micah tucked his hands around my jaw and stared into my eyes.

  "Do you want me to touch you?" he asked, his voice low and grumbling in his throat.

  "Yes," I said.

  "Do you want to know everything that I've wanted to do to you since the first time that I looked at you?"

  I drew in a breath.

  "Yes."

  “Let me show you.”

  I felt my stomach clench and Micah's erection harden even further, seeming to strain toward me through his pants. Without another word, he tilted his head for another kiss. I felt stronger and more confident now, and willingly offered myself over into his hands. As we continued to kiss, Micah guided me backward toward the bed. When I felt the mattress on the back of my thighs, I sat. He lowered to his knees in front of me, pressing my thighs apart so that he could get between them and draw close to me. Micah flattened his hands on my chest and ran them down toward the waistband of my stretch pants. He followed the touch of his hands with a trail of open-mouth kisses from my shoulder down my chest and belly. My stomach trembled when Micah's mouth reached my navel and the tip of his tongue dipped into it.

  Micah's breath was a blend of temperature against my skin, cool against the dampened trail that he created and warm against the other areas. The contrast was intoxicating, and I found myself lifting my hips toward Micah almost involuntarily. He reached around behind my back to release my bra, slipping it down my arms and away from my body so that my breasts were bare. His hand ran along my waist and onto my hip before moving into the apex of my thighs. The touch was subtle, but it felt like a shock of electricity moving through my body. Micah tenderly but insistently massaged into the warm dampness of my center, only increasing my arousal so that I ached with need. Micah sat back and pulled off his shirt, then rose up on his knees so he could kiss me again. I felt the warmth of his chest brush across my breasts and I reached out to touch it, finally indulging myself in the feeling of his chiseled muscles and his skin on my fingertips.

  As we kissed, Micah's hand moved up to my waistband and he joined it with the other so that he could ease my pants down my hips and off of my legs. I was fully bare now, and I felt Micah's eyes roaming along every inch of my body that he could see. I had been able to feel the hunger in those eyes before when he looked at me, but now he wasn't just looking at me. He was touching me, tracing my body with his fingertips rather than just his gaze, offering me everything that had hovered in those heated moments between us, surrounding us but just out of reach.

  Micah drew my bottom lip into his mouth and sucked it possessively. I replied by bringing his tongue into my mouth and his lips left mine to touch my cheek, then made their way onto my jaw and down the side of my neck. The progression was torturous, but I didn't want to miss even a moment of it. Micah's tongue found my nipple and he paused there, concentrating on the taut peak for a few moments while his fingertips replicated the attention on my other breast. He continued down and soon I felt his tongue dip into my navel again. My body was trembling with anticipation although I was unsure of what each step ahead would bring, I was nearly overwhelmed by the need to follow him as he guided me.

  I reached down to run my fingers through Micah's hair as he kissed his way from my navel to the apex of my thighs. His hand slid up the inside of my thigh and suddenly his fingertips slipped into the tender petals of my core. I bit down on my lip to muffle the gasp that built up in my chest and squeezed my eyes closed. I could feel Micah's breath teasing the sensitive pearl at my peak and then the wet heat of his tongue slid up through my folds. I drew in a breath and Micah seemed to release the control he had been maintaining since guiding me to the bed, opening his mouth fully so that he could close it over my center.

  His mouth was skillful and attentive, moving over my most sensitive curves and dips with just enough suction to make my body tingle and my breath escape from my lungs in desperate pants. I felt him touch one finger to my entrance and an instant later it slid fully inside. His hand picked up the rhythm of his mouth so that he stroked inside me while his mouth continued to suck and lick along my clit and folds. After a few seconds he added another finger and brought his mouth up, so he could concentrate all of the movements of the tip of his tongue on the tight bud he had coaxed forward with his masterful attention.

  I pulled myself back up to a reclining position so that I could see Micah. I watched as his hand left the mattress besides me and ran it along his own belly. It slipped beneath the waistband of his pants and pushed it out of the way to reveal his thick cock. I groaned as he wrapped his hand around his mouth watering length and began to stroke himself in the same pattern that he continued with his fingers inside of me. I felt myself rushing headlong toward oblivion but just when I thought I wouldn't be able to hold off any longer, Micah took his mouth away from me and sat back on his heels. I watched as he stroked himself a few more times, his eyes focused on my wetness and his fingers enveloped within me. Finally, his eyes lifted to mine and he licked his lips, gathering my shimmering fluids from them.

  “More?” he asked in a husky whisper.

  I kept my hand at the base of his head and ran the pad of my thumb across my lips. I wanted to respond, but I could only nod. Micah had stood and pushed his pants the rest of the way off, kicking them aside so that they tangled with mine on the floor. The sight of our clothes piled together was oddly intimate and I felt an irresistible desire to touch Micah. I reached forward and tucked my hands around the back of his thighs, applying gentle pressure to guide him closer to me. He positioned himself between my thighs and I flattened my hand on his belly to feel the muscles twitching there. I looked up at him with questioning in my eyes. Micah pressed his hand to mine and guided it down his belly until it reached his erection. Keeping his eyes locked on my face, he guided my hand to wrap around his shaft until I held it in a tight grip.

  I drew in a breath and followed the pressure of Micah's hand as he taught me to stroke him. After a few moments he pressed his hands to my shoulders and toppled me backwards onto the mattress. He stretched his body across mine and covered my mouth with his
own. I hungrily sought his tongue and groaned into his mouth as he rocked his hips, stroking his impossibly thick, hard cock against my belly. I could feel the slick fluids forming at the tip of his erection, allowing our skin to glide across each other easily as the sensation built. We kissed passionately, inhibitions falling away if we offered ourselves fully to what was happening between us.

  Micah ended the kiss and backed off of the side of the bed so that he knelt between my legs again. I thought that he was going to run his tongue up through my folds again, but I was surprised by him flattening his hands on the backs of my thighs and pressing my legs up and apart. He paused for a moment, blowing a stream of cool air against my heated skin. Then I felt his mouth touch my opening and I let out of strangled cry, sitting up sharply in response to the dizzyingly pleasurable sensation. He used one hand to press me back onto the mattress and the other to lift my hips slightly so that he had better access for his eager mouth.

  I couldn't withhold the moans that his mouth inspired. I closed my eyes and relinquished myself to the intense feeling of Micah's skillful, attentive touch and felt myself opening further beneath his tongue. My legs were shaking and sweat with beating on my chest when he gave a final lick that traced up to my clit again. I opened my eyes and saw Micah stand.

  “Slide back,” he said breathily.

  I did as I was told, sliding backwards on the bed so that I was lying with my head on the pillows. Micah climbed up onto the bed with me, positioning himself in between my legs and tipping forward to plant his hand on the side of me so he could look down into my face. I felt his thick and impossibly hard erection nudging at my opening and I lifted my knees slightly. Suddenly I noticed his eyes darken and he gritted his teeth, mumbling something beneath his breath. He scrambled off the bed and I felt a sinking feeling in my belly. I sat up, reaching for the blanket that was spread across the comforter so that I could cover myself. Then I noticed that Micah was going to his dresser, opening the top drawer. He turned around and I saw a box of condoms in his hand.