Returning Pride

by Jill Sanders

  “Is Lacey working tonight?” Allison asked nervously.

  “No, she keeps showing up, but I send her home.”

  “Your sister has been helping us out the last couple weeks. I always did enjoy having her around,” Mrs. Adams said as the waiter delivered their dishes.

  Iian stood to excuse himself so they could enjoy their food. “Yes, Lacey has always been very helpful. You will let me know if you need anything. Anything at all.”

  As he stood, he met Allison’s eyes and was trapped in the richness of their blue color. “I better get back to the kitchen. Enjoy your dinner.” Reaching over he placed a small kiss on her mother’s hand.

  “I’ll see you around Ally.”

  Allison smiled as she realized she enjoyed her name coming from his lips. She had just enough courage to smile back at him as he turned and walked away.

  I’ll see you around Ally. Why had that sounded more like a threat? She wondered. She did like hearing her nickname come from his lips.

  “Oh, well,” her mother blushed as Iian moved back to the double doors. “Like I said, all good looking men in that family. You know Abby, I had hoped that you and Todd would make a couple. Then he married Sara. Always was a homely little thing. I never liked her father, Mr. McKinley; he was a beast of a man. Oh, well.” Her mother picked up her napkin and placed it neatly in her lap. She was becoming accustomed to being called her sisters name. “Now Mr. Jordan, that was a man. You know I never did tell you girls that George and I had been an item in high school,” her mother sighed, “Yes, he was the one that got away.” Then she picked up her fork and began eating.

  Allison didn’t know how much more of the emotional games she could handle. She loved her mother, but this disease was taking hold so fast it made her head spin. Adding to it was the news that her mother and Iian’s father had been an item in school. She didn’t know how many more surprises she could handle. She just prayed that her mother’s good mood would last through the evening.

  Chapter Three

  Half way through their meal, her mother had become irritated at something. She still wasn’t sure of what, but she could see the tension building in her face.

  “Mom? Are you okay? Do you want to go home?” Allison leaned over to take her hand.

  “Don’t touch me!” Her mother snapped out loud enough that the whole restaurant looked over. The two women Iian had been sitting with earlier looked over, chuckled, and then bent their heads together. Allison was sure they were enjoying a good laugh at her expense.

  “Mom,” she whispered, reaching out to her again.

  “Tell your father to go to hell. I don’t care what he says, you can’t go,” her mother yelled and then jumped up from the table and started walking across the room quickly. Allison was two steps behind her when her mother ran right into Iian.

  “Mrs. Adams, is there something I can help you with?” He asked in a patient voice.

  “Oh!” Her mother’s fists were clenched by her side. She blinked a few times and then said, “Yes, would you be a dear and fetch my coat. I think I have a headache coming on and would like to go home.”

  Allison walked up behind with her jacket and purse in hand.

  She mouthed, “I’m sorry,” to Iian.

  “Mrs. Adams, you come back soon and visit me.” Iian helped her with her coat and then took her arm lightly and started walking towards the front door.

  “Oh, you should come visit us tomorrow. I can bake some of those cookies you boys always enjoyed. We haven’t had company for weeks. Bob and I would be so happy to have you come over. Allison wouldn’t you like to see your little friend tomorrow?” She asked, patting Iian’s hand like a two-year-old. It was quite funny to see her mother’s five-foot-nine frame standing next to a six-and-a-half foot man, calling him a “little friend”.

  “Yes, Mom, that sounds like fun.” Allison chimed in trying to play along.

  Once they had gotten her mother into the car, she turned around to faced Iian. She hadn’t realized how close he was and felt intimidated at his height. She was tall herself, reaching almost six feet, but he towered over her.

  Most men she’d dated were either her height or shorter. She had never really had to crane her neck to look at anyone like she was doing now. It was nice.

  “You don’t have to visit tomorrow. I’m sure she won’t even remember dinner tonight.” She tried to smile at him.

  “I would very much like to visit. I’ve missed you since you’ve been away. Maybe we can catch up.” Reaching up, he placed a strand of her hair behind her ear.

  His closeness was intoxicating. All her nerves flooded back to her and she found it hard to concentrate on breathing.

  “I can bring some lunch,” he kept a strand of her hair in between his fingers lightly.

  “Well…” She found it hard to think of what to say next. His eyes were on her lips; she quickly licked them and in turn looked at his mouth. It was a sexy mouth; his lips were full and he was smiling. She looked up into his eyes. She knew he was looking at her lips to read what she was saying, but there was something more in his eyes.

  “See you tomorrow then. Around eleven?” When she nodded back, he quickly shoved his hands in his pockets and walked back through the front doors.

  Her mouth was intoxicating. It had taken all his strength to pull his eyes away from her.

  He felt like humming, but just smiled to himself instead. It was nice to know that he could make her feel nervous. It had been there on her face. He thought he was always the one to be nervous around her, and had never really focused on how she had been acting. Tonight however, he had focused on her and only her. He enjoyed the feel of her hair in his hands and hoped to enjoy it again soon. He wanted to get his hands on her.

  As he made his way back through the restaurant, Jenny and Lori waved him over again. He motioned to their waitress to cut them off, as Jenny was currently sitting on top of the table. After all, this was a family restaurant not a bar.

  “Jenny, Lori, I think you two have had enough tonight,” he said with a smile as he walked over to pull Jenny off the table. He noticed she wasn’t quite stable on her feet. “Why don’t I call you a cab?”

  “Oh, come on Iian, join our little party. We were just going to head over to Lori’s place and sit in her hot tub. Why don’t you come have some fun with us?” Jenny leaned on him and twirled his hair around her finger.

  “Yeah, Iian come play with us,” Lori said, almost falling out of her chair with laughter.

  Iian took a deep breath. Right then he would have chosen to be anywhere other than here. There had been a time in his life where he would have gladly played the game with these two. However, recently he had outgrown their games. As he untwisted Jenny’s fingers from his scalp, he looked up to see his brother standing at the back of the room with a humorous grin on his face. Iian quickly signed for him to help get the girls under control. His brother smiled and signed that he was a married man now. Then he walked into the back room leaving Iian to fend the women off.

  It took all his patience and almost fifteen minutes to get the intoxicated pair into a taxi heading home. More than once his butt had been grabbed by either woman. He was pretty sure one of them had left a small bruise on his right butt cheek. Once freed from their grasp, he stormed into the back towards his office. His brother sat with his feet up on the desk, looking over some papers.

  Iian signed, “Way to help out, bro. I was being mauled out there and all you can do was laugh,” he pushed his brother’s feet of his desk.

  As Todd’s feet hit the ground, he signed back. “Looked to me like you had everything under control. Besides, I’m a married man. I can’t have people seeing me being mauled by other women,” he smiled and added, “Besides, we all know you enjoy being handled by those two. They come around often enough. By the way, which one is it this week. Jenny?” He laughed at Iian’s crude reply, which would have been more appropriate coming from a sailor.

  Iian sat down h
ard in his chair.

  “Come on, those two have been after you since school. Either let them down gently or make up your mind which one you want.”

  Iian looking directly into his brother’s face. “I have made up my mind.”

  “Who?”

  “Allison Adams.” At Iian’s reply, Todd’s chin dropped.

  Just then one of the waitstaff poked his head in momentarily and said, “Todd, your pizzas are ready.”

  “Thanks.” Turning back to his brother he signed, “So, you’re finally going to go for her? All I can say is… It’s about damn time!”

  Iian stood and started pacing the small room in frustration. Then he turned on his brother and signed, “Don’t start on me! She was here tonight with her mother.” He chewed his bottom lip and remembered the lost look in both of their eyes. “Her mother isn’t doing well. Ally is holding up though.”

  Todd saw the concern on his brother’s face. Ever since he could remember, his brother had been mooning over one person. He knew there had been other women, but in his mind, Iian had always focused on one. Allison Adams.

  As Todd got up and walked to the door, he turned and signed, “I’m sure you can handle Ally. I say go for it.” He smiled as he walked out the door to grab his dinner for his family.

  Iian sat there and ran over the evening again in his mind. He asked himself if he had wasted every minute of his life. He’d spent years avoiding Ally because of his fears. He discovered after dinner tonight that he wasn’t the only one who had been affected.

  He was determined to start living a new life, one where he wasn’t alone all the time, and there was no time like the present to start. He got up, and made an excuse to his staff, climbed onto his motorcycle, and headed toward that new life.

  Allison was about to pull her hair out. After the wonderful dinner at the restaurant, her mother had insisted on finding the old cookie sheets. Ally had tossed them out years ago. To calm her mother down, she had spent almost ten minutes looking in every kitchen drawer and had come up with two newer pans that, according to her mother, “just wouldn’t do.” All along her mother chatted happily about having Allison’s “little” friend over tomorrow and how the cookies wouldn’t turn out properly if she didn’t use the right sheets.

  It seemed like a life time ago, but Allison missed the days when her mother had actually taken care of her. Allison felt she had always taking care of her mother since her father had died.

  Her time alone in California had been spent painting, learning, or frequenting art shows. It had seemed to fly by more quickly.

  She had made quick friends with Ric Derby, owner of the Blue Spot Art Galleries. She had not only lived above the swanky gallery in the city, but had also worked there part-time. Her art had taken off much quicker than she’d imagined. It had been in such high demand she felt like she was actually falling behind on keeping some of the deadlines she’d set for herself. She had been looking forward to coming home and relaxing, to taking a break from the busy life. She wanted, no needed, the slower pace and some peace. She needed home.

  She remembered, it was at the last art show in San Diego that she had decided to leave California for good. The feeling of the whole room staring at her had taken over, almost like being in an Alfred Hitchcock movie where the walls were closing in. She’d sprinted from the room and had ended up on the patio roof, hoping to be alone. Ric Derby had apparently been feeling the pressure as well, and had also escaped to the rooftop.

  “It’s a little stuffy in there. Did you come to get some air, too?” Ric smiled at her.

  She respected the man and admired that he kept a level head when dealing with all the “moody” artists, as he liked to call them. He had assured her that he never thought of her in that way or a romantic way. Actually, he made a point to tell her often how level-headed she was.

  “I think I actually saw the walls moving in on me.”

  “Like in Star Wars?” He smiled at her.

  “I’m sorry?” She leaned against the railing and tried to see the stars through the hazy night sky.

  “You know the scene where they’re rescuing Princess Leah and they jump in the trash, then the walls…”

  “Close in on them…” she laughed. “Yes, much like that. Maybe I need a break?” She meant to think it, but had said it out loud.

  “So, take one.” He smiled and took another sip of his drink.

  Could it be that simple? She’d tilted her head so she could keep trying to scan the night sky for stars. Finally, he turned around to face the same way.

  “What are you looking for?” He looked up.

  The clear night was just too bright from the city lights to see any stars. She took a large breath, released it, and realized what she was really looking for wasn’t stars. It was home.

  As she looked around the kitchen at the mess her mother was making, it made her heart and head ache. She knew that she’d choose the messy kitchen over a room full of stuffy people any day.

  Standing up, she dusted her slacks off and helped her mother reach the cookbook on the top shelf just as the door bell rang.

  When she open the door, she saw Iian standing in the light of the front porch. Upon seeing her, he pulled the screen door opened himself and stepped in without invitation.

  “Um, hello Iian?” She stepped back as he walked in. She didn’t know why he was there, but a part of her was very glad he was.

  “Are you okay?” he asked, looking around before she could answer. When his eyes returned to her face she nodded. “Where is your mother?”

  “In the kitchen,” she said, feeling dazed.

  “Is everything alright?”

  “Iian, she wants to bake cookies, and well…” she trailed off when his finger rubbed gently over her cheek. She hadn’t been aware of the tears spilling down. “I just don’t know what to do,” she whispered.

  “Well, I guess it’s a good thing I showed up,” she looked at him blankly, “Baking just happens to be my specialty.” He gave her a lop-sided smile and pulled her back towards the kitchen.

  Allison didn’t quite know how it had happened. She stood and watched Iian work his magic around her small kitchen, her mother sat at the table and chatted happily. Her mother had been so excited to see a man baking cookies in her kitchen that she started talking about the old days, as if they were old and not current events. Things looked brighter with him moving around the small room.

  Allison kept trying to help him out, but he was a whiz and she felt more in the way than anything. By the time he had put a batch of home-made chocolate chip cookies in the oven, her mother’s head was drooping.

  “Well dears, I’m going to head to bed. Goodnight. Oh, and save some of those for your little friend tomorrow.” With that, she disappeared down the hallway.

  When Iian turned, he watched her mother heading down the hall. He looked over at her with a look of question.

  “She’s going to bed,” she signed to him. She rubbed her forehead with her hand. Her head was pounding and she was sure she was going to have another sleepless night worrying about her mother.

  Iian was shocked. Allison had signed the last statement with ease. He hadn’t known that she knew sign language. There were a few dozen questions he wanted to ask her, but she was rubbing her forehead like she was trying to take the skin off. He saw her eyes dim and could see tears beginning in her eyes.

  Walking behind her, he started rubbing her shoulders. He could feel her initial shock, but then she relaxed into his hands.

  “You really should take a break; you haven’t stopped since you got back.” He could feel her body vibrate in his hands, but didn’t stop her to remind her that he couldn’t see her lips. When he felt the vibration under his fingers stop, he added. “You didn’t tell me you knew sign language.” He felt her shoulders tense.

  She slowly turned around and stood with her back stiff. Looking into his eyes, she signed, “I learned it a while ago.”

  Then she turned an
d walked to the oven and peeked in on the cookies. He waited. He could see the flush in her face and was interested in learning more.

  His mind quickly replayed all the days he had signed something to one of his siblings in front of her. Conversations that he had hoped would remain private. The personalized and intimate sign motions he’d used to signify her name. He cringed inwardly.