Darkness Lay Ahead

by Baheya Zeitoun

  ***

  An introvert at heart, she wished to live away from people. In a solitary and peaceful environment surrounded by nature and devoid from the materialistic existence that smothered her. In a world where one was worth more than what they own and what they earn, she would be relieved of much stress and anxiety. She hoped for a day when numbers no longer governed her life, when creditors wouldn’t knock on her door and when she didn’t have to feel responsible for a debt she didn’t owe. Proof of that debt arrived in a small envelope on the first day of each month, without delay. She stared at the white envelope with the clear plastic window for an immeasurable amount of time. Until it finally struck her, this was an opportune moment and she was going to take advantage of it.

  The next morning was no different than any other; however after an uneventful work day she resigned and collected all documents. Her boss was shocked by the abruptness of her request. She had never expressed any kind of displeasure regarding her job; on the contrary she was a dedicated employee with an immaculate record. The explanation she gave was precise though; she was moving and was given little notice herself. Scattered clouds between deep oranges infused with dark purples, marked the faded disappearance of the day and the initiation of her plan. With her belongings, savings and an adequate amount of food packed in preparation for her journey, she bid her childhood home farewell and left.

  She rode the metro until the end of the line. It dropped her off at an obscure remote neighborhood, where old abandoned houses hidden behind untamed plants stood next to low unfinished homes. Its unusual appearance gave a foreign guest, like herself, the misperception that it was part of the nearby forest. The area seemed forgotten and its few inhabitants were indifferent about its depreciating state. Her sudden presence was startling; it was odd and almost unheard for an inner city resident to be found in such a location. She noticeably stood out as curious eyes followed her every step. It was unsettling.

  Nonetheless she was directed to a tiny inn located at the point which officially marked the end of the city, only a few meters away from the forest. It separated the enclosed man-made structure from the wilderness and was primarily used by weary travelers recovering from long trips of the road. She rented a room overlooking the thousands of acres of tight-knit trees, growing high as one unit into the night sky. The sheer size of it from such proximity was frightful. It was difficult to imagine based on pictures on a computer screen. There were several locations beyond the forest, none familiar to her. Yet her plan was still simple, she would walk through the forest until the trees stopped and the streets started and that would be her new home. It was not the most thought-out plan, nor was it the most reliable, but it was enough for her to go by. She chose this peculiar route because it was untraceable. There was no electronic record or digital proof of any kind that she left. The method made her feel like a fugitive, but it was the only guarantee of a clean beginning wherever she would end-up.

  Putting her fears aside she hoped that the next day would bring her more clarity. After having a heavy meal, the inn keeper explained to her how to navigate through the forest. He was astounded at first by her question, because she didn’t look like a person who had spent much time outdoors. But he helped her without judgment either way. He showed her a path, which cut across the side of the road and extended into woods, and instructed her to follow it without a single detour so she wouldn’t get lost. He also provided her with a map and plenty of water, but warned her that it would be a long and strenuous walk that would take a couple of days. She assured him that she didn’t mind the length, whether in time or in distance. He wished her luck on her way out, still not understanding why a young woman like her would take on such a deranged quest. After hundreds of meters of tiresome walking and intermittent breaks she made it to the path. Being enveloped by nature for the first time was invigorating; her pace increased with every step.

  Before long she was running through the forest, alone, with nothing but her backpack. The backpack contained her life: the past, the present, the future all squeezed into one bag. The path grew narrower as the trees grew thicker. But she continued to run faster and faster until her legs could barely support her any longer. Why was she running? She didn’t know. There was no one chasing her, no one threatening her, yet she felt the need to escape. Her heart beat quickly; she breathed unevenly. She put her family and her friends behind her to embark on an insane, unpredictable journey to the unknown.

  As the darkness began to scare her and exhaustion took hold of her, she decided to rest her fatigued body and start again when the sun was up. She lied on a soft patch of grass covered with crisp brown leaves and used her bag beneath her head as pillow. Curling her body into the fetal position, she tried to sleep. Ominous noises echoing across the forest made her task nearly impossible. Every time she tried to relax and allow herself to sleep, the distant sound of a hooting owl or the howl of a wolf would startle her. The grass below her was soft and comforting, the soft winds were cooling, but the fear overcame her senses. She couldn’t rest so long as it was inside of her. It was fear that forced her to run. She didn’t know which was more frightful, though, the forest, her former life or her indefinite future?

  All she knew was this: she would be dead if she hadn’t left. Not dead in the literal sense, but figuratively speaking that was the path she was moving towards. As dangerous as her choice was, it was exciting and essential. She couldn’t bear her life any longer; the monotony along with the extreme waves of change. It was enough. Enough to command her departure from the city she was born and raised in, and take control of her own life however frightening that may be. Thus the day she decided to leave, was when she learned she was destined to cross the woods and see for herself what was on the other side.

  The night crawled with unfriendly creatures; killer beasts and venomous beings. Where they hid or if they even existed where she slept? She had no idea. She prayed for the night to end quickly and safely. The sound of her heart in her ear felt like a ticking clock, every beat bringing her closer to sunrise. To say she slept that night would have been a lie. At dawn she was wide awake, anxious and enthusiastic about the start of a new day. She walked slowly, trying desperately to let go of her fear. The terror residing in the night before was forgotten when the tender morning sunrays hit her face. With every passing day, she grew more accustomed to her surroundings; almost feeling at home among the wild plants and lurking animals. Proud of her limited survival skills and new found independence, she sustained herself in this unfriendly environment. She carefully navigated through the trees at a steady pace, wondering how long her journey would last. By the fourth day her wandering came to a stop, and she finally caught a glimpse of what lie beyond the once mysterious forest.

  The End

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  Thank you

  Baheya Zeitoun