Slayed

by Amanda Marrone

  I can’t let anything happen to her.

  My body still feels fuzzy and I struggle to get my knife from its sheath on my leg. With every ounce of energy I can muster, I raise my arm and come down hard on the back of his neck. Bones crack and I’m sure I’ve partially severed his spinal cord. This distracts him enough for Kiki to push him back. He lands on the bed and she’s on him. Stake raised high, she plunges it directly into his heart on the first try. He goes limp and I swipe my blade, hacking against his neck until it’s severed all the way through.

  Kiki and I stare down at him—our labored breathing the only sound.

  “I thought you said they aren’t very powerful in the daytime,” she manages to say in between gasping breaths.

  “They’re not supposed to be. I’ve never seen anything like this before. It was like he was at full power times ten.” The body hasn’t decayed much so he’s not one of the ancient vampires that are stronger than normal. What gives?

  “You didn’t tell me they were wall-crawlers like Spider-Man either.”

  I look at her helplessly. “I’ve never seen one do that.” I cover my mouth with my hand and force myself to take slower breaths through my nose. What the hell kind of vampire was he?

  “You’re bleeding.”

  I look down at my chest and besides the puncture wounds there are deep scratches from where he ripped at my shirt.

  “Let me get something to stop it.” She runs down the stairs and I hear her ripping a sheet. I collapse on the bed next to the vampire trying to understand what just happened.

  She pounds back up, and I take the ripped piece from her. I wince as I put pressure on my wounds. “Well, we’re even now. I saved your life and you saved mine.”

  “Wow. I did, didn’t I?” She sits next to me. “Holy unicorn shit. I just killed my first vampire.” She gives a little laugh. “When you opened that bathroom door I wanted to run the hell out of this place and curl up in a ball and cry—but now I am officially Kiki Crusher, vampire slayer.”

  We both do jazz hands and despite the pain, I laugh. I imagine we look surreal—two girls—one half-dressed and bleeding—giggling on a bed next to a decapitated vampire with a stake in his chest.

  “If this were a fairy tale your debt to me would be paid and we could each ride off into our own sunset,” I offer.

  She shakes her head. “I’m not going anywhere. I know people in this town. What if they get Dorothy who runs the bookstore—or Gabe—or even Shelly who is always trying to stop me from ordering more drinks?”

  I look her in the eye. “Are you really up for another house cleaning?”

  “Are you?”

  “I guess so. My mother would certainly expect me to be.” I look over at the vampire. “It’s never been this bad during the daytime; I think this guy was some sort of fluke. I’m also thinking I’ll need a couple of painkillers before the next house. If you want to call it quits though, I totally understand.”

  She sniffs. “I’m not going to let you do it by yourself—you almost got killed just now.”

  I want to protest, but she’s right. I was sloppy. In my defense I’ve never seen a vampire crawling around on the ceiling before, but still …

  “Why do your parents let you hunt alone? Aren’t they worried you might … you know …”

  Her question makes my stomach churn uncomfortably. I’ve asked myself this question before. How can two people be hell-bent on protecting others but put their child in harm’s way? “I don’t know,” I say, not wanting to admit that hunting vampires is an obsession with my parents—one that supersedes me.

  She picks up my torn shirt—it looks like someone slashed it with a knife. “This is trashed. Take this.” Kiki unzips her hoodie and hands it to me.

  “Thanks.” I remove the sheet from my chest and see most of the bleeding has stopped. The long scratch marks throb and I grimace in pain when I reach out and take the hoodie. It’s warm and smells like perfume—something I’ve never had.

  I put it on and realize this is as close as I’ll ever get to sharing clothes with a friend. In a Jennifer-Kate piece, she cautioned readers to make sure each article of borrowed clothing gets returned in good shape. I’ve already gotten blood on the inside of the hoodie, but I know Kiki won’t mind.

  Jennifer-Kate knows everything about fashion but shit about vampires.

  “Did it hurt?” Kiki asks as I zip the hoodie up. “You know—the vampire. I asked Sam about it, but he’d only say it was something he’d like to forget.”

  While I doubt Kiki has any interest in dating a vampire now, I decide not to tell her how frighteningly good it felt. Now I understand what the vampire-fetish groupies find appealing about the whole thing. I’m pretty sure my particular vampire wasn’t in it for a quick fix—he seemed like he was going to go all the way and I would’ve ended up like Mrs. Harker.

  “Let’s just say it sucked,” I finally say. “And I can’t believe I got groped by a vampire. Not what I was expecting for the first time someone touched my boobs.”

  “You’ve never been felt up before? Ever?” She stares at me like this is crazier than killing vampires.

  “I’ve never even held hands with a guy! I drive around the country in a van with my parents. How exactly am I going to meet someone and get to know him well enough so I’d want him to feel my boobs?”

  My fantasy prom date, Brad, flashes into my head.

  If only.

  Kiki shakes her head. “Daphne, Daphne, Daphne. That is what a one-night stand is for—or what I have with Gabe. You don’t necessarily need to know them well or even like them for a good booty call.”

  I know what Jennifer-Kate would say to that, but since Kiki and I are getting along at the moment I decide not to mention it. “I couldn’t do that. I think you need time to get to know someone—build up trust.”

  She smirks. “You might be surprised how quickly you can build trust with the right person, but you do what feels right and I’ll do what feels good.”

  I roll my eyes. “Let me call the kill in and we can hit our next house.”

  Kiki jumps up and pumps a fist in the air. “I’m ready. Let’s kick some more ass for team Van Helsing!”

  I smile comes to my lips. Kiki isn’t going away anytime soon—and I’m glad.

  8.

  We leave the second house, a ritzy vacation chalet, a little worse for the wear.

  “How about we call it a day?” I suggest even though it’s only eleven o’clock. My entire body aches. I have never taken a beating like this before. I check my phone—still no reply from Mom and Dad. They always check in. Worry runs through me like cold water.

  Kiki nods. “Three on two,” she says as we slowly make our way to the limo. “Holy shit, that was crazy, and that one was like a kid—maybe eleven or twelve.”

  “He looked like a kid but he was old. Did you see the rate of decomposition after you staked him? There wasn’t much left besides bone and dried connective tissue.”

  She shudders. “That was so fucked-up.”

  “Yeah.” That little “kid” threw me into a wall with the force of a Mack truck.

  The front of the hoodie Kiki lent me is soaked in blood, and one of the straps of her cami has been torn off. Our pants are ripped at the knees, and we’re battered, bruised, and bloody.

  Kiki leans over and puts her hands on her thighs and inhales deeply. She tilts her head up at me. “Are you sure they’re supposed be weaker during the daytime? Are you sure you didn’t get that backward?”

  Before I can answer Sam jumps out of the limo and gasps when he sees us. He’s probably six foot five and three hundred pounds of muscle and I’m thinking Kiki should have tried a little harder to get him to fight with us.

  “Miss Crusher, your parents would kill me if they knew I was allowing this.”

  She holds a hand up to his face. “We talked about this last night. I need to do this so don’t even think of telling my parents I’m hunting vampires.”

>   “But surely—”

  Kiki points at him. “I’m a big girl; I can take care of myself!”

  He nods. “How many this time?”

  Kiki holds up three fingers. “And I got the worst one!”

  Despite his objections to the hunt, I can’t help but think he looks a little proud. He opens the door to the back and Kiki drags herself in. Sam puts an arm out and blocks me from going in. He gives me a look like it’s my fault Kiki is risking her life. “If anything happens to her …”

  “This was her idea.” I gesture toward Kiki. “And do you ever have much success getting her to take ‘no’ for an answer?”

  His eyes soften and he shakes his head.

  “But I’ll do everything I can to make sure nothing happens to her.” As I join Kiki in the back, all I can think is what might have happened to me if she wasn’t there. The vampires in South Bristol are on crack or something.

  Kiki groans and closes her eyes as Sam pulls the limo away from the curb. “We need a drink.”

  “It’s not even noon and you promised you wouldn’t drink on the job. Besides, I have to go out again tonight for street patrol.”

  She sticks her tongue out. “Yes, Mom.” She opens one eye and looks at me. “I’m guessing you’ve never even been drunk before.”

  I fold my arms across my chest. “Like that’s a bad thing?”

  She sits up and rolls her eyes. “I know you’ve led a somewhat strange and sheltered life, but your bucket list now includes getting felt up by a guy with a pulse and getting drunk. You don’t have to get puking drunk or anything, but God, you need to live a little.”

  “I drank a whole beer once even though my parents have told me—”

  “Hey,” she interrupts, hitting me on the shoulder.

  “Ow, what was that for?”

  “Look, it’s your friend.” She leans forward and knocks on the partition. “Sam! Pull over by that guy in the unfortunate trench coat.”

  Tyler Harker is talking on his cell phone by the side of the road. “He’s not my friend,” I insist. “Keep going, Sam.”

  “Don’t listen to her, pull over,” Kiki insists. She lowers her window. “Hey, Slayer-dude, do you need a ride?”

  Tyler is completely taken aback and briefly glances over his shoulder as if Kiki is addressing some other vampire slayer nearby. “Me?”

  “Yes, you—we met this morning in the parking lot, remember?”

  “Kiki,” I say through clenched teeth. “What are you doing?”

  She turns to me, grabs her breasts with both hands, and then points to Tyler.

  My face flushes. “Oh, my God, are you kidding me? Not going to happen!”

  “I’d bet he’d be happy to feel you up; a guy like that has probably never even touched a boob,” she hurriedly whispers to me. She sticks her head out the window again. “So Daphne and I just cleaned a couple of houses, if you know what I mean, and I was thinking we might want to hit the hot tub at my house to unwind a bit. Care to join us?”

  I lean my head back and whimper.

  “Um, no, thanks. I’m going to go back to my hotel room; I just talked to my dad and he’s on his way to pick me up.”

  Kiki scoffs. “You’re turning down a limo ride and a hot tub so you can hang with your dad? Are you kidding me? Oh, and we have freshly brewed coffee,” she sings. “Really good coffee.”

  He raises his eyebrows and I glare at Kiki. I had told her earlier how our crappy hotel didn’t even have free coffee and how heavenly it was to get some of the good stuff.

  He brushes the hair out of his eyes and looks at us uncomfortably. “Um, my dad wants to work on this theory he has and I kind of have to help. He’ll get really pissed if I blow it off.”

  “Well, we can drive you to the hotel and compare notes,” she continues. “You won’t believe the shit these vamps put us through today. Right, Daphne?”

  She pulls me over to the window and I nod wearily.

  “I won’t take ‘no’ for an answer. After all, we slayers have to stick together.”

  He looks past Kiki—his blue eyes lock onto mine. “Not everyone shares that sentiment.”

  My stomach flutters and I wish he’d look away. “That’s because everyone has their own way of doing things, and just because someone does something the other someone doesn’t, doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be doing it or should be made fun of!”

  Kiki raises an eyebrow. “Okay, Daphne, I have no idea what the hell you just said.” She turns to Tyler who is rolling his eyes. “Have I missed something?”

  “No!” I say before he can respond. “But my parents don’t want me hanging around with him.”

  “Oh, for God’s sake, what are you, two?” Kiki chides. “Who cares what your parents say?” She sticks her arm out and motions toward Tyler’s phone. “Call your father,” she commands.

  Tyler nods. “Okay.” He opens his phone and pushes a button. “Uh, Dad,” he says after a few seconds. “I don’t need a ride.” He turns his back to us. “I’ll be right there—I just have to do something. Just something, okay? I know, I’ll be there.”

  He listens for a few more seconds and then shuts the phone. Kiki opens the door, and as he approaches, grabs the sleeve of his coat and pulls him to the limo. He takes the seat opposite me and she shuts the door. “Sam, could you take us to the hotel?”

  “Yes, Miss Crusher.”

  “Thanks, big guy.”

  Tyler looks around the limo appreciatively. He’s dressed in head-to-toe black again, and the guy-liner is back. He’s wearing some sort of cologne that pleasantly reminds me of ginger snaps. He rubs his hands over the soft leather seats. “Not bad.”

  “It’s the only way to hunt vampires,” Kiki says. She points to the large thermos of coffee as the limo pulls away from the curb. “Interested?”

  “Thanks, that’d be …” His eyes widen as he finally takes a good look at us. “Whoa, what happened to you two?”

  My face flushes as I remember it looks like I’ve been through a wood chipper. I peek at my reflection in the tinted window. Half of my hair has come unbraided and is sticking out at odd angles, I have a red welt across one cheek, and the bite marks on my chest are visible. I quickly zip the bloody hoodie all the way.

  Kiki gapes at him. “I think the real question is what didn’t happen to you? Do you see him, Daphne? Not a scratch!” She gives Tyler a once-over and then draws her lips back in an exaggerated grimace. “Oooooh,” she says drawing out the word. “I’m sorry. You struck out.” She sits up proudly and smirks at me. “Looks like Team Van Helsing is kicking your butt. We already dispatched four vampires.”

  She raises a palm in my direction and I reluctantly high-five her.

  His lips turn up into a smug smile. “Actually, I cleaned all five houses on my list for a total of six vampires.”

  Kiki’s mouth drops open. “Are you shitting us?”

  I stare at him in disbelief. “Six? Already?”

  He leans back into the seat, flashing a cocky smile. “You can check with the vampire task-force agents if you don’t believe me.”

  Kiki looks back and forth between Tyler and me. “Okay, you seriously need to tell us what we’re doing wrong because we got our asses handed to us today.”

  “We got four! That’s only two less than he did.”

  “But look at us,” she shoots back. “And you got bitten!”

  My face flushes even deeper. “Didn’t have to mention that,” I say through the corner of my mouth.

  I see him eyeing my neck for signs of a bite and I’m glad the vamp got me in the chest so the telltale marks aren’t so visible. He shifts uncomfortably and looks away.

  “So what are you doing that we aren’t?” Kiki asks.

  He tilts his head so his bangs hang down and cover his eyes. “I, uh, really don’t like to talk about it, okay?”

  “Come on,” Kiki says. “Don’t be all ‘super secret slayer’ on us. We need help.”

  “No, we
don’t.”

  She holds out her hands in front of my face. “I broke six nails today, Daphne. With this crazy schedule you have me on, when I am supposed to go to the salon?” She turns to Tyler. “Details, please!”

  Tyler has a pained expression on his face like he’d rather get his butt kicked by a vampire than tell us anything. “I can’t. It’s beyond embarrassing,” he says quietly. “And really twisted.”

  Kiki leans in toward him. “You don’t know ‘embarrassing’ and ‘twisted’ until you’ve danced backup in a thirty pound unicorn costume while singing songs about fruit and puppies.”

  He stares at her.

  “Long story,” she says, leaning back. “Anyway … who better to understand than us? Right, Daphne?”

  I nod. I have to admit I’m curious. I mean, there isn’t a scratch on him.

  He straightens his trench coat and purses his lips.

  “We’re here for you,” she coos. “And if I knew some surefire way to kill vampires without getting the WWE treatment, I would tell you.”

  He gives me a sullen look.

  “So would I,” I say begrudgingly. “This is kill or be killed, after all.”

  He lets out a long breath. “Okay.” He taps his foot a few times on the floor. “You know how there’s people who, you know, let vampires feed on them?”

  Kiki and I exchange looks and I know we’re both wondering where he’s going with this.

  “Yeah,” we respond in unison.

  “Well, some of those people have formed a group, The Ankh Society, and they have a certain look and way of dressing that tells a vampire you’ll let them feed.”

  Kiki grimaces. “After what I’ve seen today I can’t believe anyone would let them do that. What’s in it for the Ankh weirdos?”

  “It’s supposed to feel really good,” he says without enthusiasm. “Really, really good.”

  Kiki’s mouth opens and she points a finger in my face. “You lied to me!”

  I hold my hands out as I feel my cheeks turn to crimson. The last thing I wanted was for Kiki or Tyler Harker to know I got off on a vampire bite.