A Dream of Home: Hearts of the Lancaster Grand Hotel: Book Three

by Amy Clipston

  “No.” She pushed her glasses farther up on her nose. “I have things to do. I’m very busy.”

  The other young lady looked back and forth between them.

  “I have things to do as well, but this is important to me.” Trey sighed. “Please, Lillian. Just hear me out. Let me take you out for coffee, and we’ll talk for a few minutes. Then I’ll drive you home. What do you say?”

  Lillian’s expression remained stoic. “I don’t think so.”

  Trey stood there for a moment. Should he insist she go out for coffee with him, or should he just leave? His heart was torn, but he knew one thing for certain—he was determined to do anything to help Hannah heal her broken heart.

  Lillian stepped back into the school, and the young lady stood on the top step watching Trey. Did she think Trey was going to try to hurt Lillian?

  His stepdaughter reappeared with a tote bag slung over her shoulder. She locked the school door and then descended the steps with the other young lady close behind her.

  “Lily,” Trey began, “if you won’t go with me, then I’m going to ask you to hear me out right here.”

  Lillian stopped in front of him and frowned. “I have nothing to say to you.”

  “That’s fine. You don’t need to speak, but I need you to listen to me.”

  The young lady said something to Lillian in Pennsylvania Dutch, and Lillian shook her head.

  “It’s okay,” Lillian responded. “You can go. I’ll be fine.”

  “Are you certain?” the girl asked.

  “Ya.” Lillian nodded. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Anna Mary.”

  Anna Mary nodded and then started down the street.

  “What do you want to say to me, Trey?” Lillian crossed her arms over her apron. “Did mei mamm send you here to speak to me?”

  “No.” Trey shook his head. “She has no idea I’m here. I’ve wanted to talk to you for some time, but I felt it wasn’t my place to get involved. However, things have escalated to a point now that I feel I have to get involved.” He took a deep breath. “Lily, I realize this change has been hard on you. What you don’t realize is how hard this has been for your mother.”

  Lillian’s frown deepened. “I can’t imagine that it’s been more difficult for her than it has for me. I lost everything—my home and my family. Mei mamm didn’t lose anything.”

  “That’s not true.” Trey worked to keep his voice calm despite his raging frustration. “Your mom feels that she’s lost you. She cries every night. Sometimes she cries during the day. She thinks I can’t hear her, but I do. And it’s breaking my heart.”

  “That was her choice.” Lillian lifted her chin with defiance, but her green eyes shimmered with tears.

  “But it wasn’t an easy choice, and it doesn’t have to be something that keeps you apart forever.” He paused to gather his thoughts. “Lily, your mother loves you. I believe you love her too. I want you to think about giving her a chance. Just come visit us and talk to her. Let her show you how much she loves you.”

  “I can’t do that.” Lillian’s voice cracked. “I just can’t.”

  “Yes, you can. I can take you over to our house right now. You can stay for supper, and then I’ll take you home.”

  “No.” She shook her head. “I just can’t.”

  “Fine. I can’t make you want to visit us. When you’re ready, you just let me know,” Trey said. “I want you to consider something. Your mother is going to have a baby. She wants you to be a part of that baby’s life.”

  Lillian wiped away a tear as it trickled down her pink cheek.

  “I don’t know if you know my story.” Tears stung Trey’s eyes. “I lost my first wife and my daughter to carbon monoxide poisoning. I was on a business trip, and they passed away while I was gone. I lost everything, Lily. They were gone, completely gone. I can’t see them or talk to them on this earth ever again. But you haven’t lost your mother. You’ve just chosen to ignore her and act like she died.”

  “It’s not that simple,” Lillian whispered, her voice thick.

  “I think it is,” Trey countered. “Your mother brought joy back into my life. And this child she’s carrying represents our love. You, Amanda, and Andrew are my family now. I want you to be a part of our family. I’d like to bring us all together before this child comes into the world. It would make your mother very happy to have you back in her life. She may have stopped being Amish, but she never stopped loving you or being your mother.”

  Lily’s lip quivered as more tears spilled from her eyes. “I have to go.” She turned and walked away before Trey could respond.

  “Lillian!” he called after her. “Please think about what I said. We’re still a family, Lillian. Let’s act like a family again.”

  Although she kept walking, Trey didn’t give up hope that Lillian would consider his words.

  Amanda yawned as she climbed the back steps toward the porch. She was exhausted after a day of sitting in classes and then working at a veterinarian’s office in Paradise. She yanked open the back door, walked through the mudroom, and found Trey loading the dishwasher.

  “How was your day?” she asked before yawning again.

  “It was okay.” He placed a plate with the others. “How was yours? How’s the new job?”

  “Exhausting.” She let her backpack drop to the floor with a thump and then sat at the kitchen table. “I love working with the animals, but it’s tiring. I had to chase one puppy through the office, and then I had to help pacify an angry cat.” She pushed her long braid over her shoulder. “Where are Mamm and Andrew?”

  “Andrew is taking his shower, and your mom is resting.” Trey wiped his hands on a dish towel while facing her. “I have your supper in the fridge. I just have to warm it up for you.”

  “I can do it.” She started to stand.

  “Don’t be silly. I’ll get it for you.” He pulled a plate from the refrigerator and then stuck it into the microwave. After he pressed a few buttons, the microwave hummed. He brought a glass of iced tea to the table.

  “Thank you. Is Mamm okay?”

  Trey frowned. “She had a rough day.”

  Amanda stood. “Should I go check on her? Does she need to see her doctor? Is the baby okay?”

  Trey held his hand up to calm her. “She’s fine now. Her stomach was upset.” The microwave beeped, and he retrieved the plate with two slices of turkey roast, noodles, and spinach. He set it on the placemat in front of Amanda and then sat down across from her.

  “Thank you.” Amanda bowed her head in silent prayer and then began to eat. “I’m sorry Mamm isn’t feeling well. Is there anything I can do?”

  “No.” Trey rested his chin on the palm of one hand. “She’s also been upset about Lily.”

  “I know.” Amanda ran her fingers over the cool glass of tea while she contemplated her twin. “I’ve been praying about Lily, and I’ve even tried talking to her. I don’t know what else to say to help her forgive Mamm. I hoped she would have come to visit us and talk to Mamm by now.” She cut up a piece of turkey roast. “I’m at the end of my rope with her.”

  “I know you’ve tried,” Trey said. “I spoke to her today.”

  Amanda swallowed a gasp. “You spoke to my sister today?”

  He nodded in response.

  “How did you manage that?”

  “I went to see her at the schoolhouse after I ran errands for your mother.” He gave her a little smile. “And she looked about as shocked to see me as you look right now. I tried to convince her to go out for coffee and talk for a while, but she wouldn’t go. So I talked to her right outside the schoolhouse.”

  “What did you say?” Amanda set her fork down beside her plate as her appetite evaporated.

  “I told her your mother misses her and she cries for her just about every day. I explained that we want her to be a part of our family and also be a part of our new baby’s life.” He shrugged. “I said everything you and I have talked about. I told her we miss her and jus
t because your mother is no longer Amish doesn’t mean Lillian is no longer part of our family.”

  Amanda nodded slowly while digesting his words. “That’s exactly right.”

  “I told her we want her to come visit us.” Trey shook his head. “I don’t know what else to say to her.”

  “What did she say?”

  “Not much.” Trey ran his finger over the table. “She cried a little, but she didn’t say anything. She just walked off.”

  “That’s my sister. Stubborn and headstrong.” Amanda picked up the fork and moved the meat around on her plate. “She seems determined to stay miserable.”

  “I’m not giving up hope yet,” Trey added. “She cried. I could tell this all hurt her deeply. She listened to me, and that was progress.”

  “Are you going to tell mei mamm about it?”

  Trey shook his head. “I don’t think I should. If Lily said she wanted to visit, then I think it would be beneficial to tell her I had talked to her. But I don’t think telling her Lily refused to visit would be a good idea.” He tilted his head. “Do you think I should tell her?”

  “No, you’re right.” Amanda frowned. “I keep praying Lily will soften her heart toward Mamm. I’m certain God will answer our prayer when he sees fit.”

  “He will.” Trey stood. “Would you like me to get you something else? We have chocolate pie for dessert.”

  “No, thanks. I’m fine.” Amanda smiled at him. “Thanks for talking to my sister today. You’re very good to my mother.”

  “I try to be good to her.” Trey started for the door. “I’m going to go check on her.”

  Trey disappeared toward their family quarters as Amanda picked at her supper. She hoped Lily would come around soon. If only Lillian could see what a good man Trey was. He wasn’t Amish, but he was a good Christian man who made their mother happy and provided a good home for them.

  While she picked at her supper, she whispered a prayer. “God, please open Lily’s heart toward Mamm. We need Lily in our family again. Please let her see she needs us as much as we need her. Send her back to us before our new sibling is born. Thanks, God. In Jesus’ holy name, amen.”

  Carolyn cradled a cup of hot tea in her hands while she sat on the porch. She smiled as Joshua walked from the barn toward the house.

  My husband.

  She loved the sound of that. They’d been married nearly four weeks now, and she was still basking in the newness of it all. She loved having a husband, a new name, and a home—a real home for her and her son.

  “Carolyn.” Joshua’s handsome face glowed in the light of his lantern as he took the steps two at a time. “It’s awfully cold for you to be sitting out here. You’re going to get sick.”

  “I’m enjoying the schee night on the porch. Our porch.”

  He smiled, and her heart turned over in her chest. She enjoyed seeing his attractive smile every day. She wondered how different he’d look when his beard grew in.

  “I’m thankful you’re froh here.” He sank onto the swing beside her, and his leg brushed against hers. “Do you want me to go get you a blanket?”

  “No, danki.” She rested her head on his shoulder. “The tea is keeping me warm. I was just admiring all those gorgeous stars in the sky. I love this time of year.”

  “I love every time of year now that you’re here.” He pushed the swing back and forth. “The animals are set for the night.”

  “That’s gut.” She closed her eyes and enjoyed the motion of the swing and the comfort of her husband beside her.

  “Now that you’re settled here, I’d like to have you help me with the books. I’ve really fallen behind on the paperwork for the recent horse sales. Would you help me with that?”

  “Of course I will.” She opened her eyes and looked up at him. “I’d be froh to help.”

  “Gut.” He rested his hand on her leg. “You know that will take a lot of time.”

  She nodded. “I’m sure it will, but I’ll learn it. I know I can do a gut job. I’m pretty gut with numbers.”

  “And in the spring, you’ll have the garden to care for too.”

  “I realize that, but Rosemary said she still wants to help with that. She enjoys coming over here and visiting Danny. She likes your assistant a lot, and she also likes spending time with me.”

  “I’d like to see this farm become your priority.” His words were gentle, but she knew where the conversation was leading. “Have you thought any more about quitting the hotel?”

  Carolyn sat up. “I don’t think I need to quit right now. I’ll reduce my hours if I have to, but I want to work there for a while longer.”

  “Why is working at the hotel so important to you?” His eyes seemed to search her for an answer. “Why don’t you want to make this farm your priority?”

  “It is my priority,” Carolyn insisted. “I just want to keep working there for a while longer. I enjoy my friends, and I like the work.”

  His expression hardened. “I don’t understand, Carolyn. You told me you wanted a home and a family. Now you have a home, and hopefully we’ll soon be blessed with kinner.”

  “I have faith that we’ll be blessed with kinner soon. Until then, I’d like to keep my job.”

  He studied her. “I’m trying to understand, Carolyn, but I can’t. What is it about the hotel that has you so determined to work there?”

  Carolyn paused and contemplated her allegiance to the hotel. “I guess it’s because it’s something that’s mine. I’ve always contributed to the family by working there, and I want to keep making those contributions.”

  “But this business is now ours.” He gestured toward the barns. “You’re my fraa. It’s our haus, our farm, and our business. You have my name. Why isn’t that gut enough for you?”

  “You’re misunderstanding me.” Carolyn tried to explain how she felt without causing an argument. “I never said this wasn’t gut enough for me. I just want to keep contributing to the family through my own salary. That’s all I’m trying to say.”

  His frown deepened, stealing his handsome smile. “I need you at home. I need you here to help me with the farm and care for the haus.” He touched her hand. “And I like having you here with me. I don’t want to share you with the Englishers at the hotel.”

  Carolyn studied Joshua’s grimace and realized he was still nervous that working at the hotel would cause her to be tempted by the English life because Hannah had met Trey while working there. She needed to convince him she wasn’t going to leave the community.

  “Josh, I’m very froh here.” She placed her cup on the small table beside her. “Working at the hotel isn’t going to change how I feel about you or our life together. I’m just not ready to give up my job yet, and I need you to understand that.”

  He turned away and stared out toward the farm.

  “Can you give me a few months to adjust to the idea of quitting?” she asked. “Just let me ease into it.”

  Joshua faced her and gave her a quick nod. “I’ll give you until spring.”

  “Okay.” She squeezed his hand. “That’s fair.”

  He stood, took her hand, and eased her to her feet. “It’s cold. Tea or no, your hand is like a block of ice. Let’s go inside.”

  As she followed him into the house, she tried to accept the notion of giving up her job by spring. She wasn’t sure why she wanted to hold on to her former life. What was she afraid of losing? She hoped she could get used to the idea of being a wife without her former independent life.

  FOURTEEN

  Madeleine was about to carry grocery bags into the house when someone called her name.

  “Madeleine.” Saul hurried up the driveway toward her pickup truck. “Do you need some help?”

  “Hi, Saul.” She nodded toward the truck. “There are two more bags in there if you don’t mind grabbing them.”

  He got the bags and followed her up the path to her house. “I was wondering if I could measure for your cabinets.”

  “Oh
, sure. That’s fine.” Madeleine climbed the porch steps and stood in front of the back door, balanced both bags with one arm, and attempted to dig the house key out of her pocket. “I was wondering when you need to take down the old cabinets so I’ll know when to start emptying them.” She started to drop one of the bags, and he reached for it.

  “Let me take the bags from you,” Saul said. “I can manage all four.”

  “Thanks.” She handed him the bags, found her key, pulled open the storm door, unlocked the back door, and pushed it open. “Go ahead.” She stepped back, and Saul moved past her.

  He placed the grocery bags on the kitchen table and then hung his coat on the peg just inside the mudroom door.

  “Thank you.” Madeleine placed her coat on the peg beside his and then suddenly felt embarrassed that she hadn’t picked up the kitchen. A pile of bills and advertisements was on the counter and a laundry basket filled with dirty clothes was on the floor by the family room doorway. “I’m sorry the house is a mess.” She pushed the basket of laundry into the family room. “I was going to go to the Laundromat tomorrow.”

  “The Laundromat?” Saul raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you have a wringer washer out there?” He pointed toward another small room off the kitchen.

  “Yes, but I don’t remember how to use it. The last time I used a wringer washer I was twelve, and my mammi helped me.”

  “Do you want me to show you how to use it?” he offered.

  “Oh no, thank you. I don’t want to trouble you.” She waved off the question. “I can go to the Laundromat. I just wait until I’m running out of clothes, and then I spend the afternoon there. I take a good book with me.”

  He studied her and then gave a quick nod. “Fine, then.” He pulled a measuring tape and small notepad from his pocket. “I’m going to take some measurements and make some notes. Is that all right?”

  “Go right ahead.” She began unloading her bags, placing the groceries in the pantry, refrigerator, and freezer while he worked. She tried to think of a way to engage him in conversation. “Did you have a good day?”

  He didn’t answer. Was he ignoring her, or was he so engrossed in his project that he didn’t hear her?