Afterlife (Afterlife Saga)
Page 48
“Wait a minute how can you answer that by saying yes and no?” I asked, frowning.
“Everyone sees things through different eyes and it is as simple as yes and no. It always has been. Religion means something different to everybody. Every race of life, throughout time has viewed God differently but they have all had something in common...they all believed. That is the difference.” His black eyes tried to judge my reactions but he didn't look satisfied.
“What are you thinking?”
“So you’re saying that God is real but only if we choose to believe that he is and if we don't then whatever he does won't affect us anyway?” I said wondering if now I was making sense.
“Of sorts yes, but anyway now for another question...do you believe in the Devil?”
“NO, no of course not!” I said feeling that it was obviously my answer. But he laughed at me, shaking his head as if I was wrong again.
“And why not?”
“Because I know it's wrong.” Ok, now I felt like a naïve child saying it out loud causing him to laugh.
“Really, and why is it wrong to believe in a balance?” He said crossing his arms once more, as it seemed like a habit when he didn't agree with me.
“Balance?” I asked
“Then answer me this...how can you have good without understanding the evil? How can you know happiness without experiencing the misery, pleasure without the pain? These things are essential parts of life that need to be faced and endured.”
“I guess so,” I said knowing he was right, how could someone believe in the good and not the evil? Again I was being naïve.
“So, before I go on, do you Keira, believe in God and the Devil?”
“Deep down yes I think I do. I think maybe I always have.” I said feeling a weight lifting as I admitted it, as if it just confirmed my every belief in one short conversation.
“Ok, well now comes the big one...do you believe in Angels and Demons that walk amongst you?” He asked and I had a feeling he was about to confirm my fears.
“I find it hard to believe.” I said the words but did I really?
“This surprises me considering all that you have seen. I don't think you are being true to yourself Keira.” And he was right I wasn't. After all, I believed, all those years ago, in what I saw and knew as each year went by with each one that I controlled I grew less and less trusting in them. As though maybe it was me that had created them subconsciously.
“You have your gift for a reason. Don't turn your back on it now, not when it can help you the most.” I knew the meaning behind his words. He needed me to believe, because without it I would never accept what he was.
“Are you an Angel?” I asked finally getting out the question I had wanted to ask from the very beginning. Something deep down told me what he was but I foolishly chose to ignore it.
“No.” Ok, now this shocked me! And then it crashed into me like being hit by a freight train. If he wasn't one ...was he the other?!
“I am something different but what you saw of me that night...the night you were stabbed, well that was my true form...that is who I am Keira!” He said moving closer to me with a fear in his eyes that I had never seen before. It looked exactly like the same fear I had held so many times...the fear of loss.
“Heaven and Hell are not at war as the stories would have you believe. The war is here, on Earth, as it has been since the beginning of time. Fallen Angels, Risen Demons are mainly the result of deviance. Angels go against God and they are banished to earth to do good, to be granted favour at the hands of their work but sometimes they have other ideas. You see sometimes they want to stay.” He moved around the balcony letting his story unfold and I could do nothing but look on, listening to every word that flowed so freely from him.
“It is the same principle with the ‘Risen’. Demons that defy the Devil will be cast out, only being allowed back when they please him. Rogue Angels and Demons have always been a problem as they often wreak havoc on your world and they disturb the balance not only for you but for the world that you cannot see. There are many that do not, however, as there are many different forms of us and not all strive to cause destruction. Some of us are here to control it.”
“You said “us” but if you’re not an Angel then...no… it can’t be!” I couldn't finish it. I couldn’t bear the thought of Draven being from that place.
“What, you don't think I could possibly be a… Demon?” He said bitterly, hurt at my reaction but I couldn't help it, he just couldn't be. All these years of hating what I saw, he couldn't be part of that!
“I don't know anything anymore.” I said weakly and I could feel the tears waiting to arrive. How could someone show me all that compassion when they were born from a place of pure hate? I wanted to turn away from him but I couldn't. I was locked by my fate and only Draven held the key.
“I was sent here to control the balance as I am the only one of my kind. You see, my mother was an Arch Angel, which is a high-ranking Angel. She fell in love with my father who was of the Second Hierarchy in Hell. This was utterly forbidden and completely unheard of. They kept their love secret for a long time until it became clear that my mother was pregnant.” He said watching me as my face dropped in shock. WHAT! What was he saying? I couldn't help the question I had to ask,
“Angels and Demons can reproduce?”
“Yes, rarely. But not in the same way as humans, they’re created as souls and then the fate of these souls is decided upon in a divine court. Some are allowed to stay, some have to fall to a human host, only this time it was different.”
“Human host?” I said trying to control my urge to ask a million and one questions at once.
“I will get to that soon but first I will explain why I am here and not there. There was not to be only one ruling on this decision as it was not only on one plane. It was a matter to be dealt with from both sides. Heaven and Hell both came to the same conclusion, our souls, especially mine were too precious to waste. My mother had triplets, one pure Angel, one pure Demon, both incredibly powerful and very strong thanks to their heritage. With our parents being of the highest rank it was in our blood line, so to speak.”
“Ok, so Sophia is the Angel and Vincent the Demon but what are you?” I asked but he smiled as if I had made such a mistake by that remark.
“It is funny how you would think that, I suppose to humans Sophia would look more Angel than the powerful Demon she is.” He laughed at my reaction, I was shaking my head not wanting to believe her as a Demon...all this time, but then looking back to that night...well now it made sense.
“She is not bad, Keira. I know it is hard to understand as you only can go on what history has taught you, but not all Demons are bad just as not all Angels are good.”
“Ok... so like I said, what are you?” I was almost too scared to ask.
“I am a product of two souls fused together. I am part Angel and part Demon.” He then waited for I don't know what...my screaming, running, maybe my attempt at jumping from this balcony. I know he was trying to assess my mental state but when I didn't do any of these things I think he found his answer. And so he carried on,
“As I said, this was a shock to all as this had never happened before and hasn't ever since. I am the result of a forbidden love that was so strong it divided every existence in both our worlds. I have the power of the two and this made me an asset, so I was chosen to keep the balance here making sure both sides played an equal game.”
“How do you do that?” He smirked and ran his hand through his hair before answering me.
“Being more powerful than the rest helps. Mainly my word is enough on the matter but there are some who like to be more...well, shall we say... difficult.” He moved closer to me, being cautious in case I was frightened by him but when I didn't move away he had another of his answers. He closed the distance in a heartbeat and held my arms to look deep into my eyes searching for my true feelings on all that I had just heard. And there he found them
as I looked lovingly back.
I wanted to kiss him, to let him know that no matter what impossible truth I had just heard, I still needed him more than the air I breathed or the blood that flowed through my veins. Because without him it would all be for nothing, as I finally knew the reason for my visions. His fingers traced my lips before his mouth followed and his kiss burned with the same fiery passion as the night before.
“Come inside...you are cold and it will rain soon.” He said once he had finished kissing me. He placed his hand on my back and guided me through the opening that was soon closed with the glass wall that appeared.
Once inside he motioned me to sit and there was a new tray of food and drinks on the table next to where he wanted me to sit.
“Eat, you must be hungry.” He said, once again being worried about me.
“Do you eat?” I asked as I grabbed a peach from the bowl of fruit. He looked as if he was trying very hard not to laugh at my question.
“What! It’s a good question.” I said getting defensive. So he got up and grabbed an apple from the bowl and bit into it grinning like a bad boy and I couldn't help but smile.
“Yes it is and to your question, yes I do eat. I don't have to as often as you but my body still has most of the same functions as yours.” After last night I highly doubted that but I remained mute on my thoughts.
“Really, so were you born with that body?” I asked biting into the nicest peach I had ever tasted and I had to catch the juice that dripped down my chin...next time I will have to choose the grapes, less messy and embarrassing.
“In a way, this body was given to me from a willing sacrifice and I have had it ever since.” I coughed a bit of peach that shot down too quickly. Did he just say sacrifice?
“This was a great honour, Keira. He became an Arch Angel for his faith in God. See the bodies that we possess act like a vessel, but we still have to take care of them, like a plant to nourish, but our power keeps regenerating the body’s cells making it last longer. But they are not infinite, they don't last forever, eventually they grow old and that's when we move on.”
“How long have you had your body?” I asked thinking that one day he may look like someone different. I didn't like the idea. He was perfect the way he was and I never wanted him to change so when he said “Since the beginning” I was confused but happy.
“But you just said...”
“Yes, I know, but I am different. For some reason my body has only aged about five years since I was first reborn. But Sophia and Vincent have changed a few times, well quite a lot throughout the centuries.” At this I try not to choke!
“Centuries? How...how old are you?” I asked gulping hard.
“I don't think we should bombard you with too much information all in one go, after all I don't want you having a meltdown.” He said coming over to me and pouring me a glass of iced water before kissing the top of head.
“I won't...I'm fine.”
“I know, that's what scaring me, so far you have taken this all eerily well.” I guess he was right and I wondered why that was? Maybe if I had first met him yesterday and found out all this now then maybe I would be screaming. But looking back, first on all those years that I seen the unimaginable and then the gradual build-up of all things I have seen while being here...well the first thing that comes to mind is I'm just damn happy I can finally confirm that I'm not crazy!
“Ok, well what if I changed the questions?” I asked, looking at him over my glass and he looked intrigued.
“Ah, let me guess, would these questions have anything to do with you?” He grinned knowing the answer.
“Umm maybe...ok YES but you can't blame me!”
“I never would.” He teased and pushed his hair back with both his hands and I couldn't speak for watching him. Man, he was so sexy I couldn't think when he did things like that.
“What was I saying?” I confessed and he laughed at my incoherence.
“You wanted to know why you?” I nodded without replying, I wanted to know but I was also scared of the answer in case it was something I didn't want to hear.
“When did I first meet you... really?” I asked, as I wanted to be sure it was when I thought it was.
“When it was near to our visit here this year my sister was acting strange, as if she was waiting for something or someone...So when she left early I went to find her. I followed her to an open part of the forest where I found her creating her own version of the Garden of Eden. I usually indulge her, letting her get away with these things as we can manipulate what humans see, so it wasn't a worry if this was found. But then when I turned up she ran off, I didn't understand why until I saw you.”
“You saw me there, that wasn't a dream?” I asked feeling that I had known it all along. But this made me wonder, had any of those times been a dream? Maybe the reason it never felt like it was because it had been real all along. All those times I thought I was being crazy!
“No it was real. The first time I saw you, I was mesmerized, you had me locked in from that very first second and I couldn’t get away. I couldn't believe you could see what my sister had done, even though I tried to control you not to see. I couldn't help coming closer to you, you didn't seem real to me at first. And then you literally fell at my feet like you had dropped from Heaven. I couldn't help but touch you. I had to use every last bit of self-control I had, not to grab you up in my arms and take you away with me, keeping you mine forever. You don't know how hard it was...how hard it has been.” He said and out of everything he has ever said to me, this shocked me the most. Did he really feel like this? I mean he couldn't...could he?
“I wish you would have taken me away with you.” I whispered shyly, looking up at him from where I sat. Seeing him standing there with intense emotion clearly showing and with what he was telling me...I knew all he said to be true.
“I doubt that would have been a wise move...for you at least. So the only thing I could do was to make you think it had all been a dream. I tried to walk away and leave you alone but I couldn't. It didn’t exactly help when it turned out that you were working at my club right under my nose but even this was never enough. I had to keep seeing you but each time it was getting harder to make you believe it wasn't real.” It was like listening to the confessions of a desperate man or should that be desperate Demon?
“I would come to you when you were asleep just to watch you, but you always seemed to wake. It was as if you knew I was there. And of course then there was the night I saw you having a nightmare...I couldn't just watch you go through pain, you were so frightened! That was when it was the hardest to try and make you believe, I have never known such a stubborn mind in all my years!” He laughed at my frowning face, being called stubborn.
“All I could do was watch from a distance but it drove me crazy, it consumed me, like every day had turned into my own personal torture in a world that usually I help control, but over this I had none.” He looked as though this was a painful memory and to a man or ‘being’ of his importance it probably had been. I was amazed to find his feelings had mirrored my own.
“I had no idea you felt like this, the same way I felt. I can barely believe this is happening, if this is all true then why did you treat me so badly when you saw me in your club? Why did you object to me working in the VIP?” I hated talking about these times as it seemed so long ago now, things had changed so much since then but I needed to know the truth.
“Because I was trying to keep you a secret. I wanted to keep you at a safe distance from a room full of Angels and Demons. I was scared they might have been able to feed from your emotions and this I couldn't have. But mainly I wanted to keep you safely away from me!” At this he looked guilty.
“What do you mean, feed from my emotions?” Ok this I didn't like the sound of.
“Demons and Angels survive on the emotions of humans, that's where they get their energy, their power. The stronger the emotion the more powerful they become, that's why I allow humans in to t
his place making it a Gothic nightclub. The emotions of alternative people are a strong mix of both positive and negative, satisfying everyone's needs.” I heard the words but I couldn't help feel bad for all us unsuspecting humans. He said the word feed and it made me wonder if that was what he had been doing to me all along. My pain from sharing my story must have made for a good feast surely! I suddenly felt betrayed. I had trusted him and maybe this was the reason all along, the reason I was here...the reason he picked me. Was anything real about how I felt or was it just manipulated to suit his need!?
I stood up, needing to get some air, my head spun from the facts. Why else would a man like Draven want me? I had been so foolish. Of course it wasn't me he wanted it was the pain of my past! I moved towards the glass doors and Draven had been right about the rain, it was now lashing it down against the doors.
“What's wrong Keira, you look unwell?” Draven moved towards me but I put my hand up to stop him. I could feel the same pain in my heart again as the realisation finally hit me. I walked up to the doors and put my hand on the glass waiting for it to move but it didn't budge. I knew Draven must have been keeping them closed, keeping me here to continue to feed from my pain no doubt.
“I need air Draven ...let me out!” I said in a dead voice that didn't belong to me.
“Keira, tell me what's wrong, look it's raining out...please.” He said placing his hand on mine but I just shook it off.
“Let me out NOW!” I screamed at him knowing I was just adding to his enjoyment. The doors opened and I walked out into the lashing rain. I didn't care. I just needed to feel something...anything but the feeling that I was food for him! And that was all it was, just a way for him to become more powerful. Had he been playing me from the start, trying to provoke these emotions from me to increase his high? Tears rolled down my cheeks mixing with the rain that fell on my face. I could feel Draven behind me but I couldn't move, I was locked in this place with nowhere to go. I wanted to go back to before I knew any of this, back to a safe place, back to his safe embrace, one where it wasn't purely for his gain!