Attached to You

by Lindsay Paige

  This might be the perfect way to tell Deanna and immerse her into things. But is that the right way to do it? We’re not dating. I don’t need to “immerse” her into my hockey life. However, if she’s surrounded by people, she’s less likely to make a scene because of my lie, right? Would she make a scene?

  When EJ arrives, we don’t have to worry about him lying about his job. Deanna takes one look at Bree, asks to hold her, and it’s all about the baby. We sit in the living room and I keep an eye on Otis since this is his first time around a baby that we know of. He’s sitting as close as possible to Deanna with his head on her knee, watching.

  “Did you get Scotty’s text?” EJ asks me.

  “Yeah. What do you think it is?”

  “It’s about Sylvia, I think. She hasn’t been coming to—” He stops himself before he can say that she apparently hasn’t been coming to the games. “She hasn’t been around lately,” he corrects himself. “Has to be good news if there’s food and booze, so it’s essentially a party.”

  “What are y’all talking about?” Deanna asks, taking a few seconds to look away from Bree.

  “One of our friends is having some sort of party tonight because he has news.”

  “Oh cool.” She resumes playing with the baby.

  “Want to go with me?” I ask.

  EJ’s eyes widen because he knows I won’t be able to keep everyone from talking about hockey, so he doesn’t understand why I’m asking. He also doesn’t know my relationship with Deanna. If he did, he might have paused like Deanna just did.

  “Is Bree going?”

  EJ laughs. “Yeah, my babysitter is currently sick, so she’ll be with me and I’m going.”

  “Then, yeah, I’ll go.”

  Nice. She’ll go for the baby, but not for me? She gives me a small smile, though. Otis whines and lifts his big paw for attention, just missing landing on Bree’s leg. He’s a big jealous baby.

  “Come here, Otis. She’s busy. Let’s make breakfast.”

  He reluctantly comes with me and EJ into the kitchen.

  “What are you doing?” he whispers.

  “I’m telling her tonight, obviously.”

  “Why did you lie in the first place?”

  I glance at him. “Seriously? You don’t wonder about people’s motives sometimes? Besides, she was only supposed to be a one-time thing, and then only a preseason thing, and somehow, I’m still seeing her. When are you finding a nanny?” I ask to get us off this conversation and because I know he’s been picky.

  EJ glares. “I’m not leaving my princess with just anyone.”

  “Your mom can’t do it forever.”

  “I know that. I’ve restarted the search. I’m hoping to have someone before the new year.”

  I hope he can find someone. At the very least, his mom could use a break. Although, I’m sure she doesn’t mind and I know that EJ does most, if not all, of the work he can associated with raising a kid when he’s home.

  The three of us spend the day together. We mostly play with Bree and watch movies until it’s time for us to separate and get ready for Scott’s party.

  “This seems like a big step,” Deanna says when I return to pick her up. “Me meeting more of your friends.”

  “Are you changing your mind?”

  “No. I’m excited.” The smile she gives convinces me that she’s telling the truth. This is also a much healthier outing than going to a bar and getting drunk.

  “Good.”

  With that, we head to Scott’s house. Sylvia greets us at the door with what seems like a tentative smile. Her stomach is bigger and a little too round to be from simply gaining weight. I’m guessing the news is she’s pregnant.

  “Hello, Brayden.” Her eyes slide to Deanna and then to me. “Would it be bad form to ask if this is karaoke girl?”

  Ah, fuck! I totally forgot about that.

  “Karaoke girl?” Deanna asks, confused.

  “Can’t I tell you congrats and walk inside?”

  She smiles. “Thank you.” She steps aside so we can come in.

  Just when we’re a good distance away, I call over my shoulder and say, “Yeah, it’s her.”

  “What is she talking about?” Deanna asks.

  “Don’t you remember there was video of me singing karaoke? They knew a girl was involved, so they started calling you karaoke girl.”

  “So, all these people know about me?” She stops walking.

  “No, they just know I did karaoke for a girl. They don’t know more than that.”

  “Oh.”

  “Come on. Let’s find EJ and Bree.” I pull her through the house, ignoring the surprised glances from my teammates at the fact that I’m here with a woman. I find EJ easily, leave Deanna with him long enough for me to find Scott, so I can go ahead and give my congrats, even though it seems he’ll do a formal announcement once everyone is here.

  “Scotty.”

  He’s grinning already. “Did I see you with a woman, Captain Hook?”

  It’s weird; I grin, too. “Yeah. Sylvia is pregnant?” I ask even though she all but confirmed it for me by accepting my congratulations. He nods. “Congrats. I wanted to tell you before things got crazy.”

  “Thanks, man. You really don’t know how excited we are. Looks like you’re in trouble.”

  At that, I follow his gaze to see Deanna hurrying through the crowd toward me. “We need to go,” she says. “Or at least I do.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  She grabs my arm and pulls me back toward EJ. “You play for the Carolina Rebels? You’re a hockey player?” Okay, why does she not sound angry, but instead, worried?

  “Yes.”

  “And your entire team is coming here?”

  “Yes.”

  “I need to leave, Brayden.”

  “I’m sorry, man. She overheard Stella and Stephanie and asked,” EJ says as we reach him.

  “I’ll explain later, okay?” Deanna says. “But I really can’t be here.”

  I grab her wrist as she starts to walk away and pull her against me. “Tell me what’s happening.”

  “It’s not the place.”

  “Deanna?”

  She winces at the sound of Zane’s voice. Her eyes open and she whispers, “That’s why.”

  Between that and the look on Zane’s face, it hits me. He’s the other fuck buddy. Fuck! Zane advances with Ian and Sydney, who is carrying their newborn, close behind him.

  “What the fuck are you doing here?” he asks her. His gaze falls to where my hand is around her wrist. “You’re here with Brayden?” At that, Deanna yanks her wrist from my hold.

  “I’m sorry; I was just leaving.”

  “Like hell you are. You’re fucking both of us?”

  Deanna goes rigid. The few people around us fall silent, and I’m pissed with Zane for saying such a thing in front of everyone.

  “She didn’t know,” I tell him.

  “Yeah, right,” he scoffs.

  “I didn’t!” she insists. “He told me he was a financial analyst. I just found out ten seconds ago that he played hockey and I tried to leave before I saw you.”

  “That’s true,” EJ adds to help her out.

  “But you knew I played. You never watched a game?”

  “No. You said you played; I never thought much about it past that.”

  “So, it’s a coincidence that you’re fucking both of us?”

  Deanna notices Zane has garnered even more attention. “Never took you to be like this,” she says quietly before pushing her way past him. Everyone else moves out of her way.

  As I go to follow her, Zane grabs my arm. “How long have you been seeing her?”

  “She’s karaoke girl. That was the night I met her. I can promise you, she didn’t know.”

  He curses under his breath and turns as if he’s going after her.

  I grab his arm and pull him back. “You can stay.”

  He opens his mouth to argue, but I walk
away. Deanna stands by the street with her arms wrapped around herself. I call her name and she turns to face me. I wave her over to my car. I’m not walking back in there.

  “I’m sorry, Brayden. I swear I didn’t know.”

  “Don’t apologize to me; I believe you.”

  “Why did you lie about your job?” she asks, the hurt now coming through in her tone. “I mean, Zane didn’t hesitate, so I’m confused.”

  I sigh. “Well, for one, I only thought we would be a one-time thing. Short-term at the most. I normally lie if it doesn’t appear that the girl recognizes me because you never know what people’s motivations might be. You never know if they are going to be more enamored with your job and career than you. Considering things are normally short-term and don’t turn into relationships, I haven’t had any issues with lying.

  “I brought you here because I planned to tell you. It was getting more difficult to lie and annoying, too. That’s why I was late yesterday. I had to leave practice early and I was still late coming to meet you. I was wearing a suit last night because that’s what we wear to and from games. And I won’t lie, this changes things. Zane being the other person. We’re teammates and we work together. We can’t—”

  “I cut things off with him yesterday. I haven’t slept with him since right before Halloween. Though I’ve seen him a few times since, that was the last time I actually slept with him.”

  “You—” I try to wrap my head around this. She stopped things with Zane yesterday? “Were you planning to tell me that?”

  “No,” she admits, glancing out the window. “I didn’t know if things would change and if they would, if I wanted them to.”

  It’s been about two weeks that she’s only slept with me, but only since yesterday that she decided to end things altogether with Zane. Huh.

  “Does it change things?” she asks when I pull into her driveway.

  I sigh. “Let’s go inside.”

  She nods. I sit in the middle of the couch while she takes Otis outside. Deanna sits at the end and pats so Otis will sit between us. She’s putting an actual barrier between us.

  “What do you want?” I ask.

  “To keep seeing you like I do now,” she answers easily.

  “How were things with Zane?” I need to know what kind of issue it’ll be if I do keep seeing her. “Like they are with me?”

  She shakes her head. “I mean, we did go out a few times in the beginning. I forgot about that until Rose brought it up, but it’s been mostly sex.”

  “How long have you been seeing him?”

  “At least since December or January, I think. We were going to a hotel when we met because I don’t let guys come here and he said he didn’t want to go back to his place because of his roommate.”

  “Fuck.” This is crazy. “I was his roommate; he was living with me until he found a place.”

  Deanna’s eyes widen in surprise. “He just said that he was new and crashing with a teammate.”

  “So, you’ve been fucking him for a long time.”

  “Well, not really,” she responds almost defensively. “He was gone for most of the summer; that cuts it down a little. He’s not the longest guy I’ve seen. There wasn’t anything between us but sex. I mean, he’s asked me out a few times. Like, most recently, he tried to get me to go to some Halloween party, but I always said no.”

  I start laughing because this is absolutely insane. “That would’ve been my Halloween party. I host one every year, but I didn’t go because I was with you.”

  She smiles. “Seems like our paths could’ve crossed many times.”

  “Yeah.”

  “But Zane shouldn’t give you problems after the awkwardness is over. I mean, he’s never been here. I’ve already told you that you know more about me than anyone else. That includes him.”

  I grin. “Why won’t you just admit you like me?”

  She laughs. “Are you going to admit you like me?”

  Okay, so she has a point there.

  “What’s your deal anyway?”

  I shrug. “Hockey comes first. Always has. There’s supposed to be a balance between hockey and the woman when you’re in a relationship, right?” She nods. “I’ve never been able to find the balance, and after one of my relationships ended, I decided to stop trying.”

  “That’s why you’re okay with not having a relationship.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Do you think you’ll ever find that balance?”

  I glance down at Otis to avoid looking at her. “Hope so.” Looking back at her, I say, “Let me think on things for a bit and see how it’ll be with him, okay? I can’t jeopardize things with the team.”

  She nods, looking disappointed as her hand goes to Otis’s head to rub behind his ears. “Yeah, that’s understandable. I’m sorry you’re missing the party.”

  “Eh, rather be here with you anyway.”

  Deanna smiles. “I think you should spend the night and cook me breakfast in the morning.”

  “What will I get out of this?”

  “Great sex. You should do it either way; it’s the least you can do for lying to me.”

  Now, isn’t that tempting. I ignore the part about lying. If I had any idea I would still be seeing her, I wouldn’t have lied to her in the first place. I think. I’ll find a way to make it up to her, though.

  Part of me feels like I should have dropped her off and left immediately. I can’t seriously fuck or see a girl who was also sleeping with my teammate, can I? Zane seemed pissed when we left Scott’s. But if their relationship was like Deanna said, strictly fucking, then there will be mainly awkwardness to get over, right? He didn’t have an actual relationship with her. I have more of a relationship with her than it sounds like he did.

  Once he also realizes that Deanna honestly didn’t know she was sleeping with teammates, he can’t be pissed about that aspect. If Deanna started things as she did with me, by being open enough to say that I wasn’t the only one she was sleeping with, then I don’t see the problem unless she somehow led him on. More and more rationalizations form in my mind as Deanna puts on a movie and lies down with her head in my lap.

  Eventually, it hits me that I keep coming up with these rationalizations because I don’t want Zane to be a problem. I want to keep seeing Deanna.

  Zane mutters something under his breath once again. All I clearly heard was motherfucker. He’s been making comments under his breath all throughout practice. He’s pissed or upset or both, but that should stay away from the ice. He bumps into me, ramming into my shoulder too hard for it to be unintentional.

  That’s when I hit my limit.

  I grab the neck of his sweater and yank him in front of me. “Will you fucking get over it already? You fucked her and now you don’t, but I do. Stop moping.”

  His eyes widen. “You’re still seeing her?” The outrage is palpable in his voice.

  Shit. I figured he’d realize that, but he’d have no reason to assume so. “Yeah.”

  He jerks back from me. “You’re fucking kidding me.”

  “No. Stop being an ass while we’re here; can you do that? You lost your fuck buddy, get the fuck over it.”

  “She was more than that,” he argues.

  “Not to you, she wasn’t. You barely knew her!” He’s been slowly pissing me off all practice. I don’t get his anger, but I am sick of it. If everything was as Deanna said, then he shouldn’t be that fucking pissed. I’m not pissed to find out he was the other guy. Why is he so fucking pissed to find out that I’m the other guy? That she ended things with him?

  “You don’t know what I know about her.”

  “Yeah?” Before I can stop myself, I throw it all in his face, what I’m banking on that he doesn’t know about her. “Do you know she has a dog named Otis? Does she know where your spare key is? Does she know your alarm code so she can come over to your house whenever she wants? Does she come to your house uninvited?” His face starts to blanch. “Do you even know wher
e the fuck she lives, Z? Have you been in her house? Do you know where she works or what she does for a living? Do you know her mom died last week? Were you the one who went with her to the funeral? No. You’re full of shit if you actually think you know anything about Deanna except what she looks like naked.”

  “You son of a bitch.” That’s all the warning I get before he uppercuts me a good one.

  Whether I deserve his anger and his punches or not, I fight back. There are yells as the guys rush to break us up. My jaw aches a bit and my lip feels like it might be spilt; Z’s nose bleeds, but otherwise, he looks okay.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you two?” Bruiser asks.

  “Look, Z,” I start, ignoring him. “I’m sorry that she didn’t care more for you. My point is to deal with what happened, face the fact that there was nothing between the two of you, and keep the shit off the ice. We can’t win games if you’re too busy being pissed at me. I didn’t do shit to you anyway.”

  Zane pushes against Ian’s hold. “Let me hit him one more time.”

  “I walk away for five seconds,” Coach Mike yells, “and two teammates are fighting? You’re on the same fucking team!”

  “We’re all good now, aren’t we, Z?” I level a stare at him. This ends now whether he wants it to or not, whether he likes it or not. The thought of giving up Deanna gives me an uneasy feeling, even if I’m doing it for hockey. I have realized that much today. I’m not losing her because of Zane. No fucking way.

  “Yeah,” he grunts. “Personal issue and it’s over.”

  “I’m glad it’s over for you two! There are reporters watching. What do you think the headline will be for what should be a boring optional skate? My office, now.”

  As we skate off the ice, Zane says, “She came to my house last week and started crying before she left.” As if that should mean something.

  “Yeah, and I don’t know which day it was, but I can tell you that she spent every single night since her mom died at my house. She ended up with me.”

  His shoulders slump.

  “I don’t want issues, but you pissed me off with all your shit, so I said what needed to be said. Deanna ended things with you for a reason, Z. Whether that’s because of me or not, I don’t know. But you don’t have an actual reason to be pissed at me unless it’s because I’m still seeing her and even then, you’re reaching.”