Misfits

by Jen Calonita

  My cheeks feel warm. “With the harpy attack and getting called to Olivina’s chambers…I was feeling a bit overwhelmed.” I pet the mane of a nearby gray horse. “Being with animals relaxes me. When I saw the sign for the stables, I came running.”

  The horse neighs softly. Harpies. Here, at Royal Academy. Can you believe it?

  I grab a brush from the counter in the stall and brush his back. I’m not sure I want Snow to know I can understand creatures yet so I talk generally. “I’m glad everyone is okay and the harpies are gone.”

  “Me too.” Snow keeps brushing. “But some of these steeds are still worked up. They can hear harpies from a mile away, so they’ve been a bit agitated. I thought some warm blankets and a bit of brushing would do them good. Want to help me?” she asks. “It shouldn’t take long with the two of us.”

  “I’d love to.” I smile, and we get to work.

  In what feels like no time, we’ve gotten the horses brushed and covered, and the incessant neighing that filled the air when I arrived has decreased. By the time we put everything away, I think I actually hear a few horses snoring.

  “Thank you,” Princess Snow says as we up lock the barn. “You obviously know horses. Do you ride?”

  I shake my head. “No, but I’ve spent time around wild horses. All kinds of creatures actually. It’s kind of my thing.”

  “Mine too,” Snow says. “I’m working on instituting a creature care class this year. I’d really like to teach the students how to commune with our forest friends.”

  “Really?” I look up, excited. “I was just telling Olivina how badly I wanted a class like that.” I’m talking fast now.

  “Well, maybe it will happen, then!” Snow says. “She’s supposed to give me a decision tomorrow. It’s taken me a while to convince her we need a class like this, but I think she’s finally ready to come around. The relationship between a royal and a trusted animal is one that can be very beneficial to both sides. What Olivina wants for all of us, more than anything, is to feel safe and secure in our roles.”

  “Does she?” I ask before I remember who I’m talking to. “I don’t mean to be rude. I just came from Olivina’s study.” I hesitate. “I got in trouble for how I handled myself tonight.”

  Snow smirks. “I’m not surprised. Olivina is very old school when it comes to traditions and her teaching methods, so you leading the rescue was a bit much for her, but personally I thought what you did was very valiant.”

  “Really?” I ask hopefully.

  “Yes, but it’s not the way here,” Snow says, and my face drops. “Olivina doesn’t mean any harm; she’s just a worrier. She’s seen what happens to those who let villains distract them. It’s not that she doesn’t want a princess to take care of herself. She just wants to make sure you remember what’s most important…being a good leader. Do you understand?”

  “I guess.” I’m still not sure I’m convinced, but I won’t tell Snow that. “I thought she was just into parties.”

  Snow laughs. “She loves those too! All the glamour of being royal appeals to her, but the purpose of RA is for her to mentor royals. She does it well. Olivina helped us through our hardships, and when we overcame those things, we were that much stronger. Why do you think we have a Dwarf Police Squad now? I’m the one who made sure we started protecting the village. Ella worked with her formerly wicked stepmother to start a school for students on the path to wickedness. And look at the fine students Fairy Tale Reform School is churning out. Olivina helped us get there.” Snow takes my hand.

  “She wants to do the same thing for you. If she was upset, I’m sure it was just that your mess-up reminded her of another student who caused some problems in the past.” Her face is momentarily troubled. “You seem like a girl who is going places, and I think a princess like you, Devin Nile, will find a way to rule exactly the way you’ve always planned.”

  I feel myself blush. “Thank you.”

  “Shall we head back to the ball?” she asks.

  “Yes!” I say without hesitating.

  Because when Princess Snow tells you exactly what you need to hear, you can’t help but be excited about your future.

  Royal Academy Roster

  Your first superlatives are here! First Knight Out edition!

  • Best updo: Sasha Briarwood

  • Best dancer: Logan Nederlander

  • Most likely to rescue a princess from an unexpected attack: Devinaria Nile

  • Most likely to sweep a princess off her feet: Heathcliff White

  • Most likely to be rescued by a prince: Amber Arnold

  • Best dressed: Clarissa Hartwith

  • Most likely to be eaten by harpies: Emerson Bloomswood

  • Cutest shoes: Cameron Highland

  • Best dressed roommates: Clarissa Hartwith, Jillian Hyacinth, and Ramona Mills

  • Most likely to turn into a hag: Natasha Eavesdone

  Milo the Magic Mirror’s weekly tip: Pinning up your hair requires more than three pins. Keep that updo tight so it can survive a waltz or a giant attack!

  Want to know if you Reign or you’re Ruined? Check back every Sunday for new superlatives!

  Chapter 12

  Royals Underground

  “Rise and shine! It’s a new day! Put your best princess foot forward, and choose stylish but sensible flats as you’ll be doing a lot of walking.”

  I jump up from a sound sleep to Milo’s voice. Pop! Pop! Pop! Suddenly confetti rains down on the room, fluttering around and getting stuck in my surprised, open mouth.

  “What is happening?” sputters Raina. Her hair is in curlers, and her sleep mask is still covering her eyes. “Why is it raining indoors? Who cast a spell in here?”

  “We’re up! We’re up!” Sasha sputters as two pixies hang a FIRST DAY OF CLASS banner across our bay window. “Are we going to be woken up this way every morning?”

  “Yes!” the pixies shout happily, still throwing confetti in my direction.

  A loud gong drowns out our talking. Milo’s mirror light dims, and a new voice sounds from the magical loudspeaker system.

  “Happy first day of class, students!” Hazel says. “You’ll find your class schedules with your ladies-in-waiting or stewards, along with plenty of time scheduled in between classes for primping or training.” Sasha raises her eye mask and looks at me.

  A pixie drops a pink envelope onto Sasha and Raina’s beds at the same time Ava chucks mine at me. Grouch!

  Raina squeals. “Look! It’s another ball invitation!”

  “Already?” I peel my envelope open. “We just had one last night.”

  “They’re weekly or biweekly here,” Sasha tells me, reading her own invite. “But this isn’t a ball. It’s a save-the-date for the Fifteenth Anniversary Spectacular of Royal Academy.” She grabs a quill and starts taking notes. “Wow! It’s just a few weeks away. We really need to order gowns.”

  “Don’t forget to get those wardrobes finished!” Hazel says as if she can hear Sasha. “Wardrobe inspections will occur by the end of the week. A fine wardrobe could land you in the superlatives. Speaking of which, your first edition of the Roster was delivered overnight. One change to note: write-in superlatives by students are no longer allowed. See you around the castle!”

  I can hear the screams throughout the floor. Raina springs toward our dorm room door and snatches the glittering scroll. Her eyes flash back and forth as she skims its contents, and I watch her face drain of color.

  “But”—she flips the scroll over to see the back—“I’m not on here!” She looks at Sasha and me accusingly. “Only you two are!”

  “Me?” I question. “That’s impossible. I…” Got in trouble. Even got a strike one. Do my roommates know? “What did I get?”

  “‘Most likely to rescue a princess from an unexpected attack,’ which was definitel
y a write-in superlative,” Raina says accusingly. “And Sasha got best updo.”

  “Well, that’s no surprise.” Sasha touches her curlers. “My hair didn’t move at all last night. It’s this new hair-shellac potion I concocted, and it—”

  “Clarissa won best dressed and best roommates!” Raina interrupts. “How can that be? My gown was imported and took six months to hand bead! And a boy won cutest shoes. What is happening here?” Raina lets the scroll of superlatives float to the floor and stumbles back to bed. “I don’t understand. I looked picture-perfect. I reacted the way a princess should when under attack—accepted it with grace and waited for my prince to come. And yet, I didn’t get a single mention! Snow got in the Roster every week she was here. Heath is in this week’s too, and I’m not. This is dreadful. I’ve failed my family.” She pulls her blanket over her head.

  I look at Sasha for help, but she’s already at her vanity taking out her curlers. I pick up the list of superlatives and read them again. The students picked me? But what I did goes against everything Olivina says we should do during an attack. No wonder she’s getting rid of write-in votes! No matter. I’ll just have to really wow her this week with my princess knowledge and aptitude. Just as soon as I find my manual.

  “It’s only the first scroll,” I say soothingly as Lily pops out of my nightshirt pocket and nabs a passing fly. “I’m sure you’ll do something really impressive and get on there this week.”

  “That’s easy for you to say,” the blanket tells me. “You already had a private meeting with Olivina. I bet it was glorious.”

  I hesitate. Part of me wants to talk to someone about how strange last night was, but Sasha and Raina’s families are super close with the fairy godmother. I bet they’d think I was just overreacting about her comments. “It was good, and I’ll tell you all about it sometime, but right now I need your help, so get dressed.”

  “You need my help?” The blanket shifts slightly.

  “Yes. Didn’t you say I needed to go to the Royal Underground and have dresses made?”

  My roommates scream so loudly that Brynn comes running into our room.

  “Devin finally realizes she needs new clothes!” Raina tells Brynn. The two jump up and down excitedly.

  “But wait,” Brynn says, fixing the cap on her head. “Devin doesn’t have an appointment yet. I’ve tried calling the Underground six times since we opened Devin’s trunk, and I can’t get her in till November.”

  “November?” I cry.

  “Well, the anniversary invite just came out, and all the ladies-in-waiting rushed to make appointments.” Brynn looks at Sasha and Raina. “You both have yours next week.”

  “Thank God.” Raina clutches her chest. “We have to get Devin something sooner.” She goes to our magic mirror and taps it lightly with her training wand. “Milo, darling, could you be a dear and get me Marta, please? I’m sure she’s already up working.”

  “Raina, darling,” Milo says. “Students can’t use their mirrors to summon others. Only Olivina can do that.”

  “Well, Olivina would want my roommate to look her best for classes, and I know my sister, Snow, would be upset to hear you couldn’t make a simple connection for me when asked,” Raina says, and I watch her in wonder. “Especially when you’ve been looking for a way to get a mirror in Snow’s private chambers for months. I could put in a good word.”

  Milo’s mirror begins to swirl red. “Patching you through. You owe me.” Raina smiles triumphantly.

  Suddenly, I see a room filled with gowns and multicolored fabrics. A short, broad woman wearing a sash of pins pokes her head into the frame.

  “Raina! How lovely to see you, sweet pea!” Marta says. “I thought your appointment was next Monday. I just confirmed.” She puts her hands on her hips and purses bright-orange lips. “You’re not canceling, are you?”

  “Of course not, Marta, sweetums, but I need a huge favor! I know Snow and I would be ever so grateful—and would consider having you do all the gowns for our family’s upcoming reunion ball—if you could squeeze in a teensy, tiny appointment this a.m. for me.”

  “For you, dear?”

  “No, actually, it’s for my roommate, Devin Nile. She can’t get an appointment till November.”

  Marta’s smile fades. “That’s what happens when you don’t reach out to your seamstress first thing when you arrive! I assumed she would call me the moment she got her invitation to school, but she didn’t. Then I presumed her lady-in-waiting would reach out, but she didn’t either. A princess who arrives in a pumpkin coach should be begging to work with me.”

  Raina pinches me, and I jump in the frame. “Hi, Marta, I’m so sorry about that! Obviously…um…I was a clueless princess who didn’t read the manual and realize…um…how utterly valuable your time is and…uh…how desperately I…needed”—I look at Raina in a panic—“help.”

  “Devin’s already had a private meeting with the headmistress,” Raina says quickly. “I’m sure she will be very disappointed if she learns you couldn’t give Devin an appointment until November.”

  At the mention of Olivina, Marta looks thoughtful. “Be down here in ten minutes.” The mirror fades to black.

  Raina claps excitedly and hugs me. “Move, move, move! Let’s get down there!”

  Brynn throws a dress over my head and drapes a sash across my torso. She points out a small pin. “Your first superlative pin is already on here. I’m so proud, miss! I’m sure you’re going to add more each week.”

  “Sure,” I say with a half-hearted smile. I’m still feeling strange about last night, but if I need to walk and talk like a princess to appease Olivina so she allows me to continue creature care, so be it. Who knows? Maybe someday I can open a fairy-tale zoo where children can see all kinds of creatures up close. Not just deer and raccoons, but unicorns and dragons! I could have a learning center and a healing center and a…

  “Devin!” Sasha yells. “Let’s go!”

  But first I need a suitable dress.

  • • •

  We’ve been rushing through the castle so quickly that I’ve lost any sense of where we are. Sasha, Brynn, and Raina seem to know exactly where they’re going, however, and we eventually arrive at a circular atrium. Sunlight from the glass ceiling shines down on a golden statue of Princesses Ella, Snow, Rapunzel, and Rose, but we appear to have hit a dead end. There are no windows or doors in the room.

  “Is the coast clear?” Sasha asks, her eyes sharp.

  “Checking.” Brynn walks around the statue looking, up, down, and all around. “Clear.”

  Raina waves her training wand at the statue, and Sasha presses a button on Princess Ella’s statue shoe. “To be ready for a ball, a princess must go to the mall.”

  There is a flash of light and a gust of wind, and seconds later I find myself standing in the center of a very upscale indoor market. A gold sign hanging above our heads says THE ROYAL UNDERGROUND. I recognize some of our RA classmates rushing by with bags that say SCENT-SATIONAL! and RAPUNZEL’S HAIR CARE—THE ORIGINAL SHOPPE! There’s so much to see, but I’m here on a mission. I scan the shop signs around us, seeing ARABIAN NIGHTS JEWELERS (FOR ALL YOUR CROWNING NEEDS!), THE SWORD AND THE STONE, SUITS FIT FOR A PRINCE, and PINOCCHIO’S PUPPETS before spotting the sign we’re looking for:

  Marta Marigold

  Official Dressmaker for Royal Academy

  Dressing Enchantasia's Royals for Fifteen Years!

  A clock strikes nine, and Raina grabs my hand. “Don’t want to be late. Come on!”

  The four of us rush into the shop and find it already packed. Girls are holding up cotton-candy-colored creations and twirling on rotating pedestals. Others are looking at fabric on floating racks. There is even a mock pumpkin coach with a fake castle backdrop that princesses are using to practice entering and exiting a coach in massive skirts.

  I
n the center of it all is Marta. Wearing a bright-green apron dotted with pins and small swatches of fabric, she is talking to one princess, pinning another, and using her wand to sew fabric to a third. A mirror above our heads flashes wait times and rules for the shop.

  No questioning the tailor’s judgment!

  All sales are final!

  If you want something different, then find a fairy godmother!

  “Raina, darling, how are you?” Marta steps away from her clients. She snaps her fingers, and magic wands shoot off tables to finish the tasks she was doing for each girl. Marta air-kisses Sasha and hugs Raina. “Lovely gown you’re wearing, darling. Who made that beautiful confection?”

  Sasha and Raina curtsy. “You, of course!” They all laugh.

  Marta turns to me, clasps my hands, and looks me straight in the eye. Her pale-blue eyes and snow-white hair remind me of my grandmother Evelyn. “This must be Princess Devin.” I take Marta’s hand, and she pulls me into a spin. “Let’s see what I have to work with. Hmm…you’ve got good shoulders that can hold up a spaghetti-strap gown, that’s for sure. Not too tall, not too short, with lovely arms. I’m thinking sleeveless for you. Or perhaps cap sleeves! Yes!”

  “I find cap sleeves kind of binding…” I start to say, but Raina, Brynn, and Sasha shush me.

  “No need to shush her,” Marta tells them. “Every princess should have a unique style that suits her needs. Why, who do you think helped Rapunzel come up with those short dress hems to offset her long hair? Or gave Snow a hidden pocket that could hold a sword? Me! I’ve always felt a princess sparkles brightest when she is wearing something she feels fabulous in. Step onto a pedestal, dear, and let’s talk colors.” She circles me as I stand on display.

  “I’m thinking green would be lovely. Maybe some dresses in blue, perhaps. The color always worked well for Princess Peony, one of my recent brides.” She points to the wall, and I see a wedding portrait painted with the princess, the prince, and Marta. “For you, I’m thinking simple, understated. You don’t look like the kind of princess who enjoys too much fuss.”