by Carsen Taite
Ainsley saved her the trouble. She pulled Greer back into her embrace. “How about I promise to say it so much you become desensitized to it? I’ll say your name every day until you beg me to stop. Do you think that would work?”
Greer heard the tacit offer beneath the words. She wanted to accept, but she was looking for something less vague. Would her bid for more be viewed as an unwanted push or a gentle nudge? You’ve come this far, why stop now? It was her uncle’s voice she heard, blending with her own, and she knew she wouldn’t be happy with anything less than the prize that risking it all might bring. She fought to hide the fear from her tone and gave her answer, which was really more of a question. “If you said my name every day for the rest of our lives, I would never beg you to stop.”
Ainsley didn’t hesitate. “Let’s see about that.” She planted a kiss. “Greer.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Greer ushered Ainsley into her room at the ranch and closed the door behind them. She had a couple of hours before she was supposed to meet the band for a sound check at the amphitheater, and she planned to spend every minute of it alone with Ainsley. Although they talked on the phone several times a day, Greer had barely seen her over the past week between keeping vigil at the hospital and preparing for the concert.
“I can’t remember the last time I had a girl in this room.”
Ainsley took her time looking around the room. Greer shuffled her feet in embarrassment as she saw Ainsley inspect the walls covered in posters. Her high school favorites were well represented: Def Leppard, Mary J. Blige, Guns N’ Roses, U2, Paula Abdul, Queen. Ainsley finally spoke. “You certainly had eclectic taste as a teenager.”
“Still do.”
“I guess I do too.”
Greer noted the undercurrent of Ainsley’s omission. “You a Greer Davis fan?”
“I’m a recent convert. I have a backstage pass for her concert tonight.”
“Do you now?”
“I hear once you get backstage, you can get really close to the artist. It’s a girl’s best chance of getting a date.”
“Well, in my case, a date with the artist is available to only one particular ticket holder.” Greer pulled Ainsley into her arms. “I can’t tell you how much it means to have you there with me tonight.”
Ainsley kissed her cheek. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
“I’m sorry for not being honest with you from the start.”
Ainsley shrugged. “You didn’t know me.”
“I wanted to.”
“We barely know each other even now.” Ainsley’s tone signaled hesitation, and Greer heard her need.
“I promise I’ll never lie to you again, either directly or by omission. I’m sorry I ever did. I was only thinking about myself and, if I’ve learned nothing else in the past few weeks, I’ve learned the best way to look out for myself is to nurture the relationships I have with the people that matter the most.”
Ainsley heard the force behind Greer’s words, but years of guarding herself from intimacy made it difficult to recognize, let alone embrace. She needed something to quiet the last trace of lingering doubt. “Am I one of those people?”
“You are absolutely one of those people.” Greer was emphatic.
The assurance was enough. For now. Ainsley, ever businesslike, wanted to know the next steps. How often would they see each other? Where would they meet? What did it mean to “matter most”? As much as she craved answers, she decided to be content with Greer’s first step and hope the rest would follow soon.
As if she could hear her thoughts, Greer asked, “How long will you be in Santa Fe?”
“A couple more weeks.”
“And then?”
“I’ve been offered a different job. Still with Steel, but at the corporate office. No more moving from place to place.”
“I envy that. I have five houses, but I spend most of my time living out of a suitcase. Where’s the new position?”
“New York.”
“We’ll be playing Madison Square Garden a couple of months into the tour.”
“Great. We’ll make a date of it.” Ainsley faked her enthusiasm. She’d wanted answers. Well, now she had them. Greer would be off on her tour and she would be living and working in Manhattan. They would hook up for an occasional date when Greer’s tour blew into town. She might be one of the people that mattered most, but Greer, like herself, put business before pleasure. They were more alike than she had thought.
Greer sat on the edge of her bed and patted the covers. “We still have a little time before I have to meet the band.” Ainsley resigned herself to making the most of the little time they had. She raised her eyebrows. “Here? With all your heroes watching?”
“I like to think they’d approve of the choices I’m making now.” She leaned back, pulling Ainsley with her. They were both startled when Ainsley smacked her head on a hard surface.
“Ouch!”
Greer lightly rubbed the back of Ainsley’s head, then set her brand-new guitar case on the ground. She opened the case and lifted Betty out. “Ainsley Faraday, I’d like you to meet Betty Martin. My first love.” Greer spoke directly to the guitar, “Betty, I’d like you to meet Ainsley Faraday,” she paused, “my lover.” Her playful introduction fell short of what she wanted to say, but the words “my last love” seemed premature. Well, not to her, but she had no idea if Ainsley felt the same way. She’d taken enough risks lately. “Lover” was enough for now.
Greer realized her internal musings left an awkward silence in the air. She decided to remedy the awkwardness by taking action. Even if she wasn’t ready to speak the words, she could show Ainsley the depth of her feeling. Her kiss sang the most touching ballad she had ever penned and her hands strummed Ainsley’s body with more passion than she had ever experienced onstage.
*
Ainsley was amazed at all the activity taking place backstage. Greer told her the small venue at Paolo Soleri made for a modified experience compared to her usual appearances, but she was still amazed by the flurry of activity. Watching Greer in action, Ainsley was embarrassed she’d ever thought Greer’s life as a rock star was an easy ride. Since they’d arrived at the venue, Greer had been consumed with every detail of the upcoming performance. Ainsley had offered to lend a hand, but Greer had only given her one task, insisting she could handle the rest herself.
Ainsley busied herself with her assignment as if it were the most important job of her life. She stood to the side of the stage and arranged the video camera so it would capture the perfect angle of Greer and the band when they took the stage. The cable from the camera was connected to Greer’s new MacBook, and once the concert started, Clayton would see the whole event streaming live into his hospital room. He had finally been moved out of ICU, but was expected to remain in the hospital for at least another week. The news of an extended stay didn’t sit well with him, and he had made his displeasure known. Ainsley was the one who had come up with virtual attendance at the concert to serve as a short-term pacifier, and Greer placed her in charge of the logistics. With Drew back at work and Paul filling in, Ainsley was glad to pitch in.
She was happier at that moment, doing the simple work of setting up a camera to film Greer’s performance, than she had ever been as the manager of some of the top hotels in the country. Frank had called the night before to discuss the status of the transition and details about her future. Everything she had spent her life working hard to achieve suddenly seemed to have dropped out of her focus. All she could see was herself with Greer. The logistics were a hazy perimeter.
“When did you become a computer whiz?” Paul’s voice startled her from her thoughts. Ainsley acted on impulse and hugged him.
“I have all kinds of special talents.”
“Besides hotel management? Well, do tell. Planning on using any of those other talents on the road?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Just wondering what’s in the c
ards for you and the rock diva?”
“Leave it to you to plunge right in. I didn’t get you a backstage pass so you could quiz me.”
Paul held up a hand. “Easy there. I came back here to congratulate you. I heard Frank offered you the job at corporate.”
“Thanks. A few weeks ago, I would have been ecstatic. Now, I…I’m not sure how I feel.”
“I guess if you want to be with her, one of you is going to have to make a choice.”
Paul’s declaration made the issue sound so simple. It was anything but. “I suppose that’s true, but I haven’t a clue how everything will play out.”
Greer walked up and interrupted their conversation, but as happy as Ainsley was to see her, she was distracted by the replay of her discussion with Paul in her head. Greer was scheduled to leave on her world tour next week. Now that Frank had finally offered Ainsley the coveted corner office she had worked her whole life to achieve, a choice was in the offing, but no choice would fulfill both of their needs.
Ainsley shook off the creeping edge of despair and focused on the present. She stood silent as Paul thanked Greer for the backstage pass and wandered off to mingle with the local celebs who were gathered backstage for the VIP reception.
Ainsley realized she hadn’t said a word since Greer joined her, and she searched for an innocuous topic of conversation. “I have the camera all set up.”
“Great. Join me at the reception?” Greer offered her arm. Ainsley started forward, then abruptly stopped. Greer cocked her head. “Everything okay? I know it’s kinda crazy back here.”
“It’s crazy, but crazy in a good way.” Ainsley took a deep breath and plunged on. “This life—you love it, right?” Greer nodded. “And you should. I mean, you’ve worked your whole life to achieve this kind of success and you deserve it. I know how much you deserve it. I’ve worked hard too. For different things.”
Greer placed a finger on her lips. “I love you. Do you love me?” She moved her finger slightly to allow Ainsley to answer.
“Yes. Greer, I love you.” Her use of Greer’s name elicited the desired smile. She loved Greer’s smile, and she couldn’t bear the thought of compromises that might rob her of experiencing her future smiles. She tried to imagine how they could both have what they wanted, what they needed, and still have each other with all the closeness and passion they deserved. On the heels of her wish, came the answer. Greer’s finger was back in place, but she blurted out the solution anyway.
“Christmas.”
“Christmas?”
“You know, Christmas!” Ainsley desperately needed Greer to interpret the code. “Like the chile. Red and green. So we don’t have to choose between the things we love, the things we need. We can figure out a way to have it all, right?”
Greer’s grin was huge. She enveloped Ainsley in a sweeping hug and kissed her soundly. “Ah, Christmas! I’ve always been a big fan.”
About the Author
Carsen Taite works by day (and sometimes night) as a criminal defense attorney in Dallas, Texas. Though her day job is often stranger than fiction, she can’t seem to get enough and spends much of her free time plotting stories. Her goal as an author is to spin tales with plot lines as interesting as the true, but often unbelievable, stories she encounters in her law practice. Her first stab at fiction, truelesbianlove.com, was a pure romance, released as one of the debut novels in Bold Strokes’ Aeros e-book line. Carsen’s second novel, It Should Be a Crime, for which Carsen received a 2010 Lavender Certificate from the Alice B. Readers, draws heavily on her experience in the courtroom and was selected as a 2010 Lambda Literary Award finalist. She is hard at work on novel number four, Nothing but the Truth, scheduled for release in January 2011.
Carsen is married (Canadian-style), and she and her spouse live near White Rock Lake in Dallas where they enjoy cycling and walking the trails with their four-legged children.
Books Available From Bold Strokes Books
Witch Wolf by Winter Pennington. In a world where vampires have charmed their way into modern society, where werewolves walk the streets with their beasts disguised by human skin, Investigator Kassandra Lyall has a secret of her own to protect: She’s one of them. (978-1-60282-177-4)
Do Not Disturb by Carsen Taite. Ainsley Faraday, a high-powered executive, and rock music celebrity Greer Davis couldn’t be less well suited for one another, and yet they soon discover passion has a way of designing its own future. (978-1-60282-153-8
From This Moment On by PJ Trebelhorn. Devon Conway and Katherine Hunter both lost love and neither believes they will ever find it again—until the moment they meet and everything changes. (978-1- 60282-154-5)
Vapor by Larkin Rose. When erotic romance writer Ashley Vaughn decides to take her research into the bedroom for a night of passion with Victoria Hadley, she discovers that fact is hotter than fiction. (978- 1-60282-155-2)
Wind and Bones by Kristin Marra. Jill O’Hara, award-winning journalist, just wants to settle her deceased father’s affairs and leave Prairie View, Montana, far, far behind—but an old girlfriend, a sexy sheriff, and a dangerous secret keep her down on the ranch. (978-1- 60282-150-7)
Nightshade by Shea Godfrey. The story of a princess, betrothed as a political pawn, who falls for her intended husband’s soldier sister, is a modern-day fairy tale to capture the heart. (978-1-60282-151-4)
Vieux Carré Voodoo by Greg Herren. Popular New Orleans detective Scotty Bradley just can’t stay out of trouble—especially
The Pleasure Set by Lisa Girolami. Laney DeGraff, a successful president of a family-owned bank on Rodeo Drive, finds her comfortable life taking a turn toward danger when Theresa Aguilar, a sleek, sexy lawyer, invites her to join an exclusive, secret group of powerful, alluring women. (978-1-60282-144-6)
A Perfect Match by Erin Dutton. The exciting world of pro golf forms the backdrop for a fast-paced, sexy romance. (978-1-60282-145-3)
Truths by Rebecca S. Buck. Two women separated by two hundred years are connected by fate and love. (978-1-60282-146-0)
Father Knows Best by Lynda Sandoval. High school juniors and best friends Lila Moreno, Meryl Morganstern, and Caressa Thibodoux plan to make the most of the summer before senior year. What they discover that amazing summer about girl power, growing up, and trusting friends and family more than prepares them to tackle that all-important senior year! (978-1-60282-147-7)
In Pursuit of Justice by Radclyffe. In the dynamic double sequel to Shield of Justice and A Matter of Trust, Det. Sgt. Rebecca Frye joins forces with enigmatic computer consultant J.T. Sloan to crack an Internet child pornography ring. (978-1-60282-147-4)
The Midnight Hunt by L.L. Raand. Medic Drake McKennan takes a chance and loses, and her life will never be the same—because when she wakes up after surviving a life-threatening illness, she is no longer human. (978-1-60282-140-8)
Long Shot by D. Jackson Leigh. Love isn’t safe, which is exactly why equine veterinarian Tory Greyson wants no part of it—until Leah Montgomery and a horse that won’t give up convince her otherwise. (978-1-60282-141-5)
In Medias Res by Yolanda Wallace. Sydney has forgotten her entire life, and the one woman who holds the key to her memory, and her heart, doesn’t want to be found. (978-1-60282-142-2)
Awakening to Sunlight by Lindsey Stone. Neither Judith or Lizzy is looking for companionship, and certainly not love—but when their lives become entangled, they discover both. (978-1-60282-143-9)
Fever by VK Powell. Hired gun Zakaria Chambers is hired to provide a simple escort service to philanthropist Sara Ambrosini, but nothing is as simple as it seems, especially love. (978-1-60282-135-4)
High Risk by JLee Meyer. Can actress Kate Hoffman really risk all she’s worked for to take a chance on love? Or is it already too late? (978-1-60282-136-1)
Missing Lynx by Kim Baldwin and Xenia Alexiou. On the trail of a notorious serial killer, Elite Operative Lynx’s growing attraction to a mysterious mercenary could be her path to love—or to death. (978-
1- 60282-137-8)
Spanking New by Clifford Henderson. A poignant, hilarious, unforgettable look at life, love, gender, and the essence of what makes us who we are. (978-1-60282-138-5)
Magic of the Heart by C.J. Harte. CEO Susan Hettinger and wild, impulsive rock star M.J. Carson couldn’t be more different if they tried—but opposites attract in ways neither woman can resist. (978-1- 60282-131-6)
Ambereye by Gill McKnight. Jolie Garoul is falling in love with her assistant. The big problem is, Jolie is a werewolf. (978-1-60282-132-3)
Collision Course by C.P. Rowlands. Tragedy leaves Brie O’Malley and Jordan Carter fearful and alone. Can they find the courage to take a second chance on love? (978-1-60282-133-0)
Mephisto Aria by Justine Saracen. Opera singer Katherina Marov’s destiny may be to repeat the mistakes of her father when she becomes involved in a dangerous love affair. (978-1-60282-134-7
Battle Scars by Meghan O’Brien. Returning Iraq war veteran Ray McKenna struggles with the battle scars that can only be healed by love. (978-1-60282-129-3)
Chaps by Jove Belle. Eden Metcalf wants nothing more than to flee from her troubled past and travel the open road—until she runs into rancher Brandi Cornwell. (978-1-60282-127-9)
Lightbearer by John Caruso. Lucifer dares to question the premise of creation itself and reveals that sin may be all that stands between us and living hell. (978-1-60282-130-9)
