Becoming Valkyrie

by Brandy L. Cunningham

  My body went utterly still, and my eyes were afraid to acknowledge what they saw. Desmond and Akio sat close together in the meadow, laughing. I swallowed. It could be nothing, perhaps they were simply friends. The Vampire within me laughed at my naiveté. When Desmond leaned forward to kiss the lips of the beautiful woman I had called my friend, I felt despair. Why? Why did I despair when I swore I did not want him? Was I so unhinged that I couldn’t even decide what I wanted? I bit my lip. My fangs were out, and the act caused a droplet of blood to bubble up.

  Licking the drop away, I turned my back on the couple. I didn’t care. I would not care. The Vampire within me promised that soon it would matter not. Desmond was my past. I was my future. I took the long way back to the Fiddler’s. By the time I had reached the mine shaft, darkness was in full veil of the world. My mood had become black. I was angry, I was annoyed. When Aeron looked up from where he sat, deep in conversation with the Fiddler, he rose to his feet. His expression displaying worry.

  “Valkyrie, what is it? What has happened?” I hated that he could read my face so well. I stared into his eyes. Without saying a word, I walked past him. Kissing Rafael on his aged forehead, I whispered good night.

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  Dark dreams plagued my sleep. Death, decay, destruction, and sex ran rampant in my mind. In one image, I was entangled with Desmond as our naked bodies rolled in the meadow. In a flash, I was gone, and it was Akio with my lover, her white blonde hair covering their naked bodies. I wanted to hate her. I wanted to rip her apart, the jealousy in me was so strong I could feel the fire rising within me.

  I was powerless to stop it. I burned with fury. I burned with pain and despair. I had loved him with a desperation so long ago, and now, I had turned him away into the arms of another. I tried to fight the thoughts within me. Tried to remind myself I was not in this for love, not in this for anyone but myself, but the bitterness crept in anyway.

  My dreams changed. I saw towns burning, and my human parents screaming as the flesh melted from their bones. I saw half dead people walking amongst the rubble and Dominique laughing over their charred bodies. I felt myself become further enraged. My fangs grew long, and my body flared to life. Flames, hot and torturous, but oh so heavenly, engulfed me.

  I felt a touch. It was delicious, perfect. Strong hands grabbed me, held me. My dreams shifted. He was above me, his nude form was glorious, and he burned for me. His long strong arms held me close as he touched me and kissed me. His eyes glowed above me as he looked upon me in awe. His fangs sunk into my throat, and I moaned. Pulling him closer to me, I grazed his lips, tasting the delicious flavor of him. My fangs roved over him, sinking into his neck as I suckled the metallic sweetness of him.

  I moaned in ecstasy. This was my salvation. This person was my soul mate, and I desperately needed to know him. Wriggling beneath the flames, I felt the grip on me tighten. My senses flared, my mind was caught between the images of dreams and the hands of reality. Scents wafted to me. Coolness and water, male, heat and fire. He was virile and strong. My eyes flew open wide.

  I stared at the man above me. He stared down at me in shock. He was not nude as in my dreams, but his arms held me down through the flames that burned me. His eyes held many things. Wonder, surprise, fear, and arousal. I didn’t understand, through the dim fog of half dream, how he could withstand the flames. But I did know who he was. I knew his name, and as I licked my lips, I knew now his taste.

  Aeron stared down at me. He seemed torn between letting go and coming closer. The chamber where I slept was dark around us. Beneath me, I lay in the layers of ash from the night's dreams. Aeron looked unsure. An emotion I was not used to seeing on his strong face. I stared at his neck, where my bite wound was still visible. Reality washed over me like a cold shower. I moved away from him. Dousing my flames, I stared at him.

  It was a mistake. Now, no flames separated us. My naked body lay uncovered, vulnerable to his eyes. And oh, did he look. His gaze roved over me in a lust-filled pursuit. When they returned to my face, they became suddenly cold. Removing his hands from me, he stood. Turning his back to me, he spoke quietly.

  “I’m sorry Valkyrie. I did not mean to…That is, you were crying out in your sleep. I could feel the heat of your fire, and the Fiddler asked me to check on you. He said you only burned when your dreams tortured you. I didn’t realize you were dreaming of…sex.”

  I felt as though the blood drained from my face if that were even possible anymore. So, he had known what my dream had been? I didn’t know how, and honestly, I didn’t want to know. I swallowed.

  “How…Uh…” Clearing my throat, I tried again. “How did I bite you?”

  He glanced back at me. I could see his struggle to keep his eyes on my face, and away from my breasts. “You were thrashing wildly. I tried to hold you down, to wake you. You…uh… you bit me. It’s fine.”

  I closed my eyes. In my mind, I knew it wasn’t as simple as that. I had felt him, felt his lips on mine. I had kissed him, and he hadn’t been able to resist. I would not admit to knowing the truth. I nodded instead, pretending ignorance. “Sorry.”

  Watching Aeron leave the darkened chamber where I sat surrounded by ashes, I was stunned. I had just drunk from Aeron, from another Vampire. What did this mean? Inside of me, the voice in my mind consoled me. She told me it was not unheard of, that during intimacies, it was sometimes done. It didn’t make me feel that much better. Whatever had just happened between Aeron and me, it was not something I was willing to explore at this moment. I shoved the memories of his lips, and the taste of his blood to the back of my mind, alongside the other subject I was avoiding. Akio and Desmond.

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  17

  Convergence

  Today was my last day as the eighteen-year-old human Vampire reborn. Tonight, was the first total solar eclipse. According to the Fiddler, tonight my merge would come to a climax, and I would forever merge into the one I was meant to be. He called her Pyralis. Vampire of Fire. I knew he was right because I too could feel it. My veins luminesced throughout the day, my senses were heightened, and my body ached. I couldn’t get the images of Aeron from my mind, so I worked myself hard all day.

  Turn, kick, punch and duck. Leap, land, roll, swipe. Dart left, stab, and jump. Over and over I went through the motions of the fighting skills Heath and Akio had taught me. Each time, I was faster, better, stronger. Heath had given up on me after several hours. I refused to stop. Desmond had tried to talk to me, I threw a ball of flame at his head. A nifty trick I hadn’t known I was capable of. Akio sat watching me silently. She knew I was upset. I could see the guilt in her eyes, the worry that I might know the truth.

  I didn’t hold blame over her. If anyone was to be judged, it was Desmond. He claimed to have loved me for four hundred years, to have awaited me with the hopes of having his love back, yet there he had sat kissing the Werewolf I called a friend. It made me question many things. I ignored Akio. I didn’t want to hurt her, and I didn’t trust myself right then. When the Fiddler walked into the clearing, he said something quietly to her. She cast another sad look my way before disappearing into the woods.

  Rafael sat upon the boulder she had vacated. I acknowledged him with a nod but kept going. I needed to be strong. I needed to stand alone, and I wanted to succeed. Duck, leap, kick. Rafael watched me for a long time without comment. When he did speak, it wasn’t what I expected him to say.

  “Good, Valkyrie. I am glad to see you are embracing your power. Now, this time do it with flame.”

  I didn’t miss a stride as I combusted into a hot burning ball of stealth. In truth, I was stronger with the fire. It fed my power. I reveled in the heat, in the sensation of it as it crawled across my skin, kissing me with its hellish blaze. Drop, roll, double kick, flame ball. Rafael smiled. I could see the pride in his ageless eyes.

  After an hour, he stood. Above us, the sun was nearly gone, and shadows rained down upon the forest. The trees cast long shadows around
us, making me glow eerily. Rafael approached me.

  “Do not be too harsh in your judgment of Desmond. He cares for you dearly, but he is foolish. Perhaps it is best you see him for what he truly is. The world takes many turns and twists. Sometimes, your enemies become your allies, and your allies become enemies. Often, what we see on the outside is not what we will find on the inside. Our eyes need to be open. You battle the darkness inside of you, but remember my dear Valkyrie, to be stronger, we often must embrace the dark side. It is what you do with it that defines you as good or evil.”

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  The feeling of her lips on mine refused to leave me. It mattered not what I did. I knew what had upset her, I had seen it in her mind as she had pressed her lips to my own, but I had also seen that it was not Desmond she dreamed of, but me. How was I supposed to move on, to keep pretending I didn’t care if she reacted in such a way to me? It was foolish, allowing myself to care for her.

  Rafael was right. In her mind, I had seen other things, it wasn’t just lust that plagued her, that made her cry out at night. I had seen a darkness gathering in her soul, in her mind and in her heart. The sweet, innocent compassionate Valkyrie I had met so long ago was fading. With each event that occurred in her new life, her soul was darkening. She was losing her hope, and her belief in good. I feared for her, and I worried what she might do.

  Pacing the edge of the lake, I stared at the moon hanging low above it, at its reflection cast so perfectly across the placid waters. The lake was utterly still tonight, and I knew it too sensed the coming change in the world. The spot on my neck where Valkyrie had sunk her fangs deep, drinking from me, throbbed. It would heal, but the memory would remain forever. Such exquisite bliss I had felt in her arms, in the heat of her flames.

  The beast within me had stirred while I held her, engulfed in her flames, but not in the way I had thought it might. For the first time in all my long years of life, I hadn’t felt afraid of it. For once, I had realized that it was truly part of me. Now, even more than ever, I longed to know what I truly was, and where my origins sprang from. Perhaps the answers to my riddle would help answer the riddle of Valkyrie. In my mind, I knew what I needed to do. Valkyrie would never be the same if she was constantly shadowed by the memories of both me and Desmond.

  I was loathe to leave her, for any amount of time, but in my heart, I knew no good would come if I didn’t. Valkyrie was raging her own inner battle already. I could only hope it was not already too late, that we hadn’t already lost the woman we all loved so much. Hope remained in my heart, but beside it, doubt had nestled close, digging its sharp claws into me.

  “Aeron, you seem very disturbed tonight. What troubles you, my friend?”

  I didn’t need to turn to know who spoke to me. I knew the voice well. Closing my eyes, I took a heavy breath.

  “I think you know well what troubles I have. I didn’t know Ghosts troubled themselves so much with those of us still living.”

  Her voice was soft, and it brought back memories of another woman. “Aeron, why do you fight the connection you have with her?”

  I ran my fingers through my dark blond hair. It needed a trim, as it nearly reached my shoulders now. “The connection between us was severed when she chose Desmond. Tell me, does she know you hover?”

  Her tinkling laugh made me imagine a warm summer day. “Oh Aeron, always so cool, so disciplined. Tell me, has she seen your true side?”

  Whirling around, I glared at her translucent form, shaking my head. How was it that she still looked so alive, so real? “What do you want? You pushed and prodded, you whispered in Byron’s ears the wealth and power of the La Croix. You whispered in my own long ago, telling me to go with him, to accept his offer. Look what it has gotten me. Four hundred years of torture. Are you satisfied now?”

  Watching her tilt her head, long lovely dark hair falling over her shoulder, I was again struck by how alike the two women were.

  “I am very satisfied, Aeron. Some events have a purpose, you know. I know what lives within you, but I’m not sure you do. The young Vampire you met so long ago, she wouldn’t have been able to handle what lurks in the darker part of your soul, but the one you avoid now, she can. In fact, not only can she handle it, but she can meet you stride for stride.”

  My jaw ticked, like it always did when I was annoyed. “So, this was what you wanted? You wanted her to burn alive, tied to a wooden cross at the hands of her own father?”

  “No, that was not my choice. Byron was good once, you know. Events have a way of changing people, and much of that, I fear, was my own doing. I never meant for him to become the evil he is now. Some things in life you cannot avoid. I could not save her that night. There are times when rebirth is necessary.”

  Throwing my hands up, I stalked away from her. Sending branches flying with my foot, I clenched my teeth together. I didn’t want to have this discussion. “Go away.”

  Her voice was soft again, almost kind. “You have lived a long time, Aeron. Why have you not sought the answers to your origin? You have had enough time, surely you are curious.”

  “Curious, are you joking? Why would I want to find the mother and father who abandoned me?”

  “Perhaps you are wrong. She didn’t abandon you. She had no choice in the matter. You were forbidden. To bear a child from another was forbidden in her times. She can give you the answers you seek.”

  I went utterly still. Every muscle within me froze. Was she saying what I thought she was? “What do you mean? Are you telling me that my mother is still alive?”

  Her head bowed once in a nod. “Indeed. She still lives. She has her reasons for remaining hidden. So much goes on that you here do not know, but you will not find her here, on Earth. To see her, you must leave this place.”

  I shook my head. “No, absolutely not. I will not leave when Valkyrie is so vulnerable. It’s not possible.”

  “That choice will soon be taken from you. She is not as vulnerable as you think, Aeron. A darkness stirs inside of her, and before the end, you will leave her.” Her voice trailed off, and when I looked back, the image of her was fading.

  I had nothing else to say to her. I watched the mist that belonged to her until all that remained was a shimmer in the air, a slight shift in the atmosphere. I didn’t care what she said. I would not walk away from Valkyrie.

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  Rafael’s words hung heavily in my soul as I sat alone, waiting for the eclipse, and the finality of my destiny. Today, I did not feel fear of the Vampire within me. Today, I felt power and freedom. I felt the world shift as I allowed my soul to fill with peace. The Spirits of this ancient forest surrounded me as I waited in the clearing. They had become companions for my forsaken soul.

  Together, we watched the darkness merge with light, and the red of the blood moon shift into place. I hadn’t known what to expect, and I wasn’t ready for the thrall of pain that brought me to my knees. My heart beat rapidly as heat and fire coursed through my body. My muscles ached, and my head felt like it would split wide open. I cried out in agony. My fangs descended, and my eyes became volcanic windows, a liquid fire that burned in the pit of my being seemed to spread and overtake everything.

  The darkness inside of me was rising. I could feel the blackness spread through my soul and shatter my heart as Valkyrie the Vampire merged with Valkyrie the girl that burned. My soul was no longer two. It was becoming one. One mind, one soul, one being. Her dark thoughts merged with mine, and together I knew we would become formidable. I felt pain, but I felt peace also, like a sigh within my soul. Finally, we had come together, we had been born for this.

  I heard his voice, that male that called to me, yet pushed me away. I felt his arms hold me, his concern for me was real as screams ripped from my chest. The fire was overtaking me, and the darkness was its ally. The pain tore through me until my mind seemed stuck in a limbo of unconsciousness. I floated there, waiting to surface. He continued to hold me, but I wondered when I awoke, woul
d he still want to hold me? The taste of his blood was still ripe within my soul, and I craved more.

  I craved the darkness I had tasted within his own soul. The darkness that beckoned to me as my own darkness ached for him. The burning subsided, the darkness rested. Slowly, my muscles shifted into place, stronger. My skin glowed with the light of the eclipse, and my beauty intensified. I was full Vampire now, well, full Pyralis as the Fiddler said. I was a Vampire of Flame, and damn, did I feel good.

  My eyes snapped open, bloody red with fire, as I lay naked within his arms. The bloodlust rose within me, and there was only one thing I wanted. To kill.

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  I tore from his arms, my naked body trembled with its newfound power. I could see the awe in his eyes as he stared at me. I growled. He was not what I needed now. I needed blood, I needed death and destruction. With lightning-fast speed, I tore through the forest, heading out of this place. The Gargoyles sensed me as I drew closer to them. I didn’t stop, or slow. I continued down my path. They rose in the sky behind me, their dark gray monstrous forms nearly invisible above me.

  I heard Aeron roar in the forest behind me. I was faster than he was, and it angered him. I smiled wickedly. I didn’t need him. I didn’t need any of them. I needed death. The Gargoyles screamed battle cries above me as we tore a path through the forest. My fires were hidden, for now. I would embrace the darkness within me. I felt myself shift as I called forth the darkness. Like a convergence, it overtook me as the two sides of myself met. My skin began to change. Ivory white became inky black. Every part of me darkened.

  I laughed. The sound came out with a sadistic melody as I allowed the thrill of what I had become to overtake me. From bright flame to the deep shade of ash, I was incredible. Powerful, wild. I was back. Four hundred years I had waited, and now, here I was. Stronger, different, better. This time no man would deter me from my mission. No one would crucify me because I was here to bring a reign of judgment down upon their souls.