Secret Heart

by Amity Lassiter

  "My knight in shining armor to the rescue…yet again."

  Nate's smile slanted across his features in a way that still made her heart double beat as he climbed the porch steps. "Nobody's keeping count."

  "I am. And you'll get fair remuneration for your trouble."

  He crested the steps, and in two strides scooped her up with one arm around her waist. He pulled her close, pressing his forehead to hers.

  "I think I'm getting 'fair remuneration'."

  While they'd had casual intimacy for weeks now, they'd crossed into completely new and different territory since the night he'd found her watching the video of his wreck. It was intense—not in a bad way—but it felt like a floodgate had opened and now he couldn't get enough touching her, tasting her, sleeping in her bed. And she couldn't say the feeling wasn't mutual, she was just that much more intensely aware of the dangerous line she walked.

  "Well, if you think it's fair, who am I to argue?"

  He smiled, drawing her close to press a kiss to her lips.

  "That's right, don't argue."

  She kissed him quickly, then stepped away, because if she didn't she could have easily enjoyed being lost in an afternoon of quiet domestic bliss, and she couldn't afford that today.

  "So there are bottles and a plate of dinner for Mason in the fridge and snacks in the cupboard. Help yourself to whatever."

  "Where's the diaper bag?"

  She quirked a brow.

  "I was thinking I'd take him down to visit Nan."

  Layla drew a breath—transferring the car seat out of her car was a pain—and if she was honest, she would have rather he didn't take his child out in public, a public that didn't know he was Mason's father, but would make fair guesses after they saw the pair out together. But she couldn't come out and tell him this, because she wasn't ready.

  "All right, I'll get his seat out of my car," she said reluctantly.

  Nate suddenly went full-watt smile. "Already covered."

  She was pretty sure he hadn't managed to transfer the seat in a blink, so she followed him off the porch, glancing back to check on Mason one last time while he led her to his truck and opened the back door. Layla peered inside and saw what looked like a brand new car seat strapped in, in the rear facing position, just like it was supposed to be. The base had been tightened into the seat so well it had a one inch indent. When she turned back to Nate, he'd puffed up, proud as a peacock.

  It made sense, really, but she hadn't expected him to take it upon himself. The rise of emotion at the thought that he'd done this on his own, without her asking, without any prompting, surprised her. Maybe he meant it when he said he wanted her and everything that came with it.

  "You did this all on your own?"

  Nate shrugged a little, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. "Nan helped me figure it out. But yes."

  While Layla stood there, shaking her head at the seat, he continued. "I just thought it would be easier for us to get out on some dates if we brought Mason with us once in a while. And we won't have to plan ahead, either. It gives us a little more option to be spontaneous."

  Nodding, she turned, wordless, slipping her arms around his waist and pressing her cheek to his chest. He touched her hip and dropped his lips to the top of her head, helping her hold in her big emotions. After a time, he pulled away, cupping her cheek and kissing her forehead.

  "All right, you gotta head out."

  She let out an audible breath and he patted her hair.

  "Get gone, or you're gonna be late. We'll be just fine. Don't worry."

  He bent to press a quick kiss to her lips and then turned to open her car door. She paused in the open space before folding herself into the driver's seat.

  "The diaper bag's by the couch. Just grab a couple extra diapers from the bedroom."

  Nate nodded, kissed her again, closed the car door softly behind her, then hightailed it to the porch to scoop Mason up out of his exersaucer. The pair watched, waving, while she backed out of the driveway, blowing a kiss out her open window.

  *

  Nate ducked into the house to grab Mason's bottles and diaper bag and then headed back to his truck. If he was honest, being alone with Mason was scary. Sure, he'd spent tons of time with him with Layla there; he'd memorized every routine for bedtime and mealtime that he'd watched—he probably could have handled things at the house alone, but Nan's support would make him feel better.

  And boy did he have her support. When he'd asked about the car seat, she'd zealously showed him how to install it and reminded him how to adjust the chest clips to the correct position to make sure Mason would be safe if they had to come to a quick stop. She'd practically been bouncing with excitement; even more so this morning when he'd told her his plan to bring Mason by her table.

  He dropped the diaper bag into the front seat and opened the back door, settling Mason into his seat like he'd watched Layla do. When he slid in behind the steering wheel, it occurred to him he had precious cargo in a way he hadn't ever worried about before. He carefully guided the truck out of the yard and drove into town five miles under the speed limit…just in case.

  Breathing a sigh of relief as he pulled into a parking spot in behind Hinkley's, Nate jumped out of the truck and opened the back door to a happily jabbering Mason. Thank God the child was so happy—he wouldn't have known what to do with him if he wasn't.

  "What do you think, Bud? Boy's day?"

  Mason responded with a hilariously deep chuckle as Nate unbuckled him from the seat, hoisting him out and onto his hip the way he'd seen the boy's mother lug him half a dozen times. It took him a minute to decide to bring the diaper bag along—it wasn't a long walk from the lot to where the main street of Three Rivers had been shut down to traffic and was dotted with tables and booths filled with games, handmade crafts, and delicious food, but who knew what could happen in that space? And he knew from seeing it before he didn't want to lug a baby with a poopy diaper for a minute longer than he absolutely had to.

  As the pair made their way into the gathering of people—everybody in Three Rivers was there—Mason lifted his hands toward the pennant banners lining the street and waved and shouted to people manning tables. The kid was a social critter, he had to give him that much, and was making sure everybody knew he had arrived. Nate paused here and there to say hello, and by the time he found Nan behind the Ladies' Auxiliary table, he was pretty much finished socializing.

  "There's my boy!" Nan exclaimed, reaching out to Mason who reacted in kind, stretching his chubby little fingers toward Nate's grandmother. Nate handed him off and watched the two interact. Mason liked him well enough but his face lit up like a Christmas tree when he saw Nan—there was no denying that was something an extra eight months with the baby would have changed.

  "What am I, chopped liver?" Nate asked with a chuckle, sliding the diaper bag off his shoulder and tucking it under the edge of their table.

  "You were cute once, too," Bernadette Hinkley supplied from where she was seated next to Nan. "It just wore off, that's all."

  Nate shook his head with a chuckle.

  "All right, all right. I'll take second string to the baby but you can't insult me."

  "Well to be fair, the pair of you together is a pretty cute scene."

  Nate glanced at Nan who nodded at him. "It was pretty cute to see you come traipsing down through here. You look like you don't have two clues."

  "I don't have two clues, but Layla asked me to look after her baby so I did. By bringing him straight to you as soon as she left us."

  Nan chuckled and shook her head, then blew a raspberry onto Mason's chubby cheek.

  "I think your Uncle Nate has more clues than he thinks he does."

  —THIRTY-ONE—

  "Well aren't you pretty as a picture?" Dell Ray sidled up to Layla's bar. The Saturday night rush was mostly gone at this point and there were still a few hangers-on. It had been a hell of a shift, so she looked like she'd just been through a mosh pi
t, and her feet were aching. On top of it all, Jimmy, who was never a welcome sight, had been camped out at the far end of her bar for the last couple hours. She could never tell if he was just being a shitty drunk or gathering intel for her mother, so she gave him a wide berth, and she'd been counting down the minutes until close for hours now. Nate was picking her up and all she wanted to do was go home and curl up in bed with him. The nature of the service industry didn't permit her to pull the face she wanted to when Dell laid it on.

  "Well aren't you just full of shit?" She smiled sweetly, her tone teasing. She typically had an easy rapport with the man. He could be a little off-color, but she just turned her back and rolled her eyes three quarters of the time. He tipped well and the few times she couldn't manage him, Danny was at hand, ready to rein him in. Tonight, Danny had taken off and left her to count the till and close up. It wasn't uncommon once things slowed down.

  Dell blustered a little at her quick retort as she headed down the bar to gather a couple of bottles and turn a few glasses over into the dishwasher under the counter.

  The bell over the door jangled and she turned to see Nate shouldering his way inside. He nodded a greeting and she flashed him a smile as he found his way to the stool at the end of the bar he'd been frequenting since his return to Three Rivers.

  "Last call, Dell," she said as she passed by him, one hand full of clean beer mugs for the display. "Then you gotta go home."

  With her free hand, she tapped the bar in front of her regular to get his attention, and with lightning speed, he grabbed her wrist and stopped her so quickly she nearly dropped the glasses.

  "Only if you're coming."

  It was low and only meant for her to hear. She swung around, fully prepared to put Dell on blast. He could get a little handsy but he was always here. She could give him a little lip without worrying about the repercussions, and was fully prepared to do so, but as quickly as she could do that, Nate was out of his seat and had grabbed the man by his collar.

  "You wanna say that again, Dell?"

  The older man released her wrist and Layla took a step back. She'd never seen Nate look the way he did; almost feral, his features contorted with anger, his eyes slanted down intensely on Dell.

  "What the hell's your problem, Montgomery? We're just having a little fun."

  "Doesn't look like the lady's having fun to me."

  She hadn't been, but watching her would-be-boyfriend put his hands on one of her regulars wasn't exactly a walk in the park either.

  "Nate," she said, her voice low. He remained focused on the man.

  "Why don't you apologize?"

  Dell's red face was a testimony to one of two things; humiliation or anger. Despite the fact she'd served him every Friday and Saturday night since she'd started at Danny's, she couldn't tell which it was.

  "Why don't you get your fucking hands off me?"

  Anger, definitely anger.

  "Okay, that's enough guys." Layla interjected, but it was clear neither man was paying her any mind. What had started as some strange bid to protect her virtue had clearly become a pissing match that had nothing to do with her.

  "Why don't you apologize?" Nate repeated.

  Dell tried to shrug off the fist Nate had balled in his collar, and turned back to his beer, muttering. "Fucking golden child think you can come back here after your epic failure and be cock of the walk." He looked up. "Too goddamn yellow-bellied to get on another bull so you came running home with your tail between your legs."

  Before she could get around the end of the bar, Nate was on top of Dell and they were on the floor, fists flying, arms and legs flailing as each man did their best to flatten the other into the dirty tile beneath them.

  "Hey! Hey! That's enough!" She reached into the fray and attempted to grab a sleeve or an arm or something, but when Dell's fist sailed past her face, missing her nose by a half an inch, she retreated, scowling. "I do not get paid enough for this bullshit. Knock it off!"

  She thought to call Danny, but by the time he'd get there, it'd be all done but the crying. Moving quickly, she rounded the end of the bar, glaring at her brother. "You could be helpful." He shrugged, draining his drink as he watched the brawl with interest. Other patrons were intentionally diverting their eyes; it was one a.m. and nobody wanted to have to explain a shiner at church in the morning.

  Danny kept a baseball bat behind the cooler for a little extra reinforcement but she wasn't particularly interested in maiming either man any more than they were already maiming one another so she grabbed the soda gun from its holster and climbed onto her knees on the bar top. The pressure wouldn't do much, but she hoped the icy sluice of water would do something, even if it was only to stop their fists long enough she could get between them without getting her own block knocked off.

  Dell came up sputtering first, face full of blood as he scooted across the floor away from Nate, who was still intent on beating the ever-loving shit out of him.

  "Everybody get the hell out of my bar!" she hollered in a voice that invited no nonsense. It stopped Nate in his tracks. Despite his previous inaction, Jimmy leapt off his stool. She was still on top of the bar with her soda gun gripped between two hands as if it might be as useful as a real one when all of the patrons finally pushed their chairs back and started to move toward the door. "Everybody."

  The bar cleared out quickly, until it was just Nate standing in front of her, a rip in his shirt, and the knees of his jeans filthy from the wet floor she would have to come in early to scrub. Complete with additional watery blood stains. He had blood on his knuckles and at the corner of his mouth, swelling already evident on his left eye and lower lip. All she could do was shake her head.

  "You wait. Ten minutes. Until Dell pulls out. Just so I can be sure you two don't go at it again in the parking lot. And then you can get the hell out of my bar, too."

  "Let me help you clean up," he said, gesturing to the mess on the floor.

  "I think you've done enough, Nate."

  He disappeared to the bathroom while she finished picking up empties from the tables and filled the dishwasher. She had her back turned to him, angrily sorting bills from her till, when he emerged.

  "I'll wait in the truck."

  "I don't care what the hell you do," she said to the money.

  "Lay, he was out of line."

  She didn't turn around, even though his voice had softened. She could hear him shift, the scrape of a stool. He thought he was going to sit at her bar after pulling a stunt like that? Pressing her lips together, she turned. If there was ever an image of a repentant man, Nate was it, sitting with his hands folded in front of him, his eyes lowered. She let out a breath.

  "Do you know how many tongues are going to be wagging now? Why the hell is Nate Montgomery protecting Layla Sullivan's virtue?" She shoved the drawer of the register shut and gathered the bag of money for the safe in the back room. "If you cost me this job, so help me…"

  "I would help you."

  Layla stopped in her tracks, her mouth fell open, and then closed again. Most of the time she could forget what a dangerous line she was treading but this was one of those times she couldn't ignore it.

  "That's ridiculous."

  "Why? And why's it ridiculous for me to be protecting your virtue? Dell had no right to talk to you like that."

  "Dell always talks to me like that." The look on his face made her glad he'd be staying at her place tonight, not chasing down Dell Ray and dragging him out of his wife's bed to finish the job he'd started on his face.

  "Well maybe it's time for him to find a new bar."

  "Would you stop? This is what happens to bartenders. Danny looks after Dell when he gets out of hand."

  "And Danny wasn't here, so I looked after him."

  "Yeah, Danny doesn't make him bleed."

  He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck in a gesture that was so 'aw shucks' she felt her anger begin to dissolve. A tiny bit.

  "All right. I'm sorry. I ju
st…I couldn't stand him talking to you like that, Layla. You don't have to put up with that bullshit. You deserve better."

  She wanted to say something about Dell Ray deserving a bar where he didn't get the shit beat out of him but Nate's expression was so earnest when he said she deserved better, she almost believed him. If he only knew the truth of her deception.

  "I'll come in with you tomorrow and help you clean up," he said, nodding toward the moneybag. "Now lock that up and let's go home."

  *

  "I'm still mad," Layla announced once they'd seen Kerri off, checked on Mason, and settled onto the couch. Nate held her and brushed her hair back from her face while she stretched her legs out over the worn floral fabric.

  "I know." The almost tangible tension from the cab of his truck was starting to dissipate. There had been a minute there where he'd thought she might rescind her invitation to spend the night but he could thank his lucky stars she hadn't. She rested her head on his chest and her body softened a bit more. "Lily says bull riders are alpha assholes, so I guess I was just giving in to my inner beast."

  "Are you about to talk about your feelings?" she asked quietly into the front of his shirt, her fingers curling into the fabric.

  "Do alpha assholes do that?"

  He felt her cheek swell against his chest; she was smiling. That was a start. He'd talk to Danny in the morning, apologize to Dell. He would fix things. For her.

  "Probably not."

  "Better not, then. But as a side note," he paused, shifting one hand down her waist to tuck his fingers against the warm skin under the hem of her shirt. She called that particular curve her love handle, and he loved its plush softness. "I can't stand to see someone mistreat you, Layla. I know you got a lot of it growing up and I was a boy; I didn't stand up for you. Nobody did. Now that I can…well, I don't care how many tongues wag. I know you want to keep this on the down-low, but I care about you, and I'm not going to let someone treat you like that. Not now that I'm with you."