Lucky Me

by B. B. Donnelly

  “Charleigh, I love you. You are not alone.” He states.

  I nod at him, because I can’t say anything right now. He finally leaves and I stare at the bottle of vodka.

  My mother never wanted me and took me away from the only person that did. How could she be so cruel? I grab the bottle and take a swig. I cringe at the taste. I just want to forget today, except for the kiss. The kiss really doesn’t mean anything. If he cared about me, why doesn’t he tell me? Why does he keep treating me like crap? I take a drink after every question in my head….

  Before I know it, the bottle is empty. I didn’t even drink the Sprite. I literally drank a whole bottle of vodka. When I stand up, I find I can’t walk straight. I hear the sounds of the party in full swing. Should I go down there?

  Suddenly, I have a major need to see Asher. I want to kiss him again. I want to touch him again. I stumble into my bathroom and keep my balance by leaning against the sink. My eyes are bloodshot from crying and the alcohol, but the blue is bright against the red. I remember him saying he likes my hair down.

  I grab a brush and try to untangle my hair which isn’t easy when I’m swaying back and forth. Hold still….

  I drop the brush. I try to pick it up, but I bump my head on the sink. Ouch…I’m really messed up.

  I hear a knock on my bedroom door.

  “Commmmmmmming….” I slur out. I stumble around, knocking over some knick knacks in my room.

  The door opens and Trix is standing there.

  “TRIX!!!!” I say happily. She gives me a surprised look.

  “Started without me?” She says, laughing.

  “Yeppppy!”

  “Oh my….” She says, laughing harder.

  “Do you want to go downstairs?” She asks.

  “I wanna seeeee Assss….”

  “You want to see ass?”

  “Noooo…”

  “Come on, let’s get you downstairs and have some fun!” She exclaims, leading me to the door.

  “Let’zzzzzzz paarttyyyy!”

  “This should be interesting.” She says and I laugh.

  She helps me down the stairs and we enter the kitchen. The house is packed full and suddenly, everyone is staring at me.

  Uh oh….

  Chapter Seven

  Why is everyone staring at me? I look down and realize I’m wearing my hot pink tank and booty shorts. This is the most revealing outfit I’ve worn in a long time.

  “Holy shit…. wow!” A guy says out loud.

  “Let’s Party!” I yell out and everyone cheers.

  They all go back to their conversations and the music gets loud. I grab a Jell-O shot from the counter. I haven’t seen Michael or Asher yet.

  I feel a hand on my ass and turn around to face Brett. He is a senior and a total jock. He is our quarterback and thinks every girl should worship him.

  “Hey. Looking good, Charleigh.”

  “Thanks.” I say and take another shot. He gets a little touchier, pulling me back against him.

  “Do you want to dance?”

  “Hell yeah!” I pull him into the living room where I finally see Asher.

  He is sitting on the couch with Natalie draped across his lap. I start grinding on Brett but keep my eyes on Asher. His eyes widen when he sees me. I pull my hair up above my head as Brett dances against me. I lean my head back and let my hair go. Wow, I feel so free…

  Brett’s hands are all over my body, but I hardly notice him. My eyes are staring at Asher and I love watching him glare at me. Is he jealous? I smirk at him and then wink.

  I look around for Trix and spot her in the corner making out with a guy. They break apart and I’m stunned. She’s kissing Blake! I thought she hated Blake. She is supposed to be my friend. God, I’m so sick of people betraying me!!

  I pull away from Brett and head to the kitchen. I pour myself a drink. I’m not even sure what it is. I think I combined a bunch of liquor together. It tastes like shit, but I don’t care. That lying, scheming, bitch….

  “There you are!” Trix comes in behind me.

  I throw my drink in her face. She stands there in shock and everyone around us stops.

  “What the hell?!”

  “You were my friend.”

  “What the hell are you talking about?”

  “You sucking face with Blake.”

  “Charleigh, I’m sorry…. I don’t know what I was thinking!”

  “Save it, you’re just like all these sheep.” I wave my arms around indicating the people watching us.

  “I really thought you were different.” I say. I take a drink out of my cup and realize I emptied it on her. I throw it on the counter and grab a bottle of beer.

  “Move, bitch, get out the way!” I sing as I pass by her. The crowd laughs at that.

  Hands grab me around the waist as I enter the front room and Brett pulls me into his arms again. I wave my arms in the air, the bottle dangling from my fingertips.

  A different song comes on and it’s one of my favorites. I twirl away from Brett and step up onto the coffee table right in front of Asher. I start singing as loud as I can and sway to the music. Everyone is cheering me on except Natalie…. She looks grumpy.

  Suddenly, I trip and the next thing I know, I’m in Asher’s arms. I cup his handsome face.

  “My hero!” I say, smiling stupidly into his face. He rolls his eyes.

  “Michael!” He yells out.

  I cuddle up to his chest. His long strides take us to Michael who is dancing with a bunch of girls.

  “Shit, Charleigh!” Michael exclaims.

  “I thought she was in her room.” Michael says, concerned.

  “Well, obviously not, she is wasted. I’m taking her upstairs.”

  Asher is taking me to my room! Yay!

  He climbs the stairs like I weigh nothing, yelling at people to move out of the way. We finally reach my room and he yells out to a couple to get out. Ewww. Finally, he sets me on the bed, and I grab his collar, pulling him towards me. He pulls away from me easily.

  “Asher…” I say breathless.

  “What?” He says, annoyed.

  “Kiss me again.” His eyes darken and he leans close.

  “Is she okay?” Michael asks, coming into the room. Asher quickly stands up.

  “Yeah, just drunk.”

  “It’s more than that, Ash. She had a pretty rough day.”

  “Like what?” He asks with sarcasm.

  “Really bad, dude.” Michael says. Please don’t tell him, please, don’t. I plead in my head.

  “Her mom was really tough on her. Told her some shit about how she never wanted her and doesn’t love her. It was messed up. She took it pretty hard. I’m worried about her.”

  “MICHAEL!” I yell. He flinches.

  “Sorry, Char, but…”

  “It’s not his business.” I moan out. Asher looks at me with pity.

  “Don’t look at me like that. My mom is a bitch and hates me…” I trail off. I’m not going to cry.

  “Uh, I’m going to go. Natalie is waiting.” Asher says and my heart breaks. No one wants to be with me.

  “Charleigh, get some sleep, okay…” Michael says and I hear the door close.

  “M’kay.” I say, snuggling into my bed.

  I can hear them talking outside my door. Michael is giving him every single detail of my conversation with my mom. I find I don’t care at the moment. I let my eyes close. I’m so tired.

  The next thing I know, someone is touching my bare leg and moving up. I moan.

  “That’s it, baby. I know what you like.” A familiar voice says. My eyes are heavy, but I open them.

  “Get off me.” I say.

  “Not this time. You know you want it.” Blake says. I start to panic when he rips my tank in half.

  “Stop!” I yell out. He covers me with his body and grabs my face with one hand. He slams his mouth on mine in a punishing kiss. His other hand is pulling down my shorts.

  I bite his
lip as hard as I can and taste his blood.

  “BITCH!” He slaps me and grips onto my hair, tilting my head back.

  “I know you have been sleeping with him. You dirty whore. I warned you.” I shake my head in denial.

  My shorts are tangled around my ankles and I’m trying to kick him off of me. He puts his legs on top of mine, restricting my movements. He uses his hand to unbuckle his belt. I watch as he unzips his jeans, pulling his briefs down. Oh god. I see his erection and I feel sick. He rips my underwear and I close my eyes….

  “I wouldn’t do that, if I were you.” My savior’s voice comes from the door. Blake pauses and I breathe out in relief.

  “Get out. She wants this. She’s my girlfriend and we would like some privacy.” Blake says. I start to yell out, but Blake covers my mouth. I bite his hand.

  “Shit.” He exclaims, shaking his hand.

  “I think that’s a no. Get out, now, before I make you.”

  “Make me.” Blake just signed his death wish.

  The next thing I know, Blake is thrown across my room and is slammed into a wall. He is punched in the face a couple of times and then dragged to my door, where he is promptly kicked into the hallway. The door slams behind him.

  My savior turns towards me, running a hand through his hair.

  “Are you okay?” Asher asks and for the first time I see fear for me in his eyes.

  “Yeah.” His eyes roam down my body and I realize that I’m practically naked.

  My shorts are around my ankles, my underwear is so ripped, I’m exposed and I’m topless with pieces of my tank top hanging down on each side. My hair is falling all over the place. I try to use it to cover my exposed parts.

  He walks over to my closet and grabs a sweatshirt and leggings. I watch him, but I’m shaking in shock. He comes close to me but watches me warily. He hands me the clothes but notices my shaky hand when I reach for them.

  “Son of a bitch.” He exclaims.

  “Has he done this to you before?” He asks, tense.

  “No, just when you came back. I think you make him jealous.” I say, shaky.

  He gently helps me out of the ripped tank top and pulls off my shorts and underwear. I should be embarrassed, but I’m not with him. He is treating me like a china doll, so gentle and fragile. When I’m naked, he pulls the sweatshirt over my head and helps me slide on the leggings.

  When I’m dressed, he stares at me, not sure what else to do.

  “Ash…” I whisper, looking him deep in the eyes.

  “Yeah?” He whispers back.

  “Stay with me.” He starts to shake his head.

  “Please…I know you hate me, but please don’t leave me alone.” I plead, vulnerable. He swallows hard and then nods.

  “Just for tonight.”

  “Just tonight.” I agree.

  I slide over and watch as he climbs on the bed. He lies there but isn’t relaxed. I cuddle up to him and lie my head on his chest. He tenses up, but then relaxes and puts a hand on my head. Soon, he is playing with my hair and his presence is a balm to my soul.

  We lay there for a few minutes in comfortable silence. My hand slides across his chest and I feel the hard muscles underneath his shirt. He tenses up at my touch. In ache starts building in between my legs. I want him, but I’m not sure…

  He stops my hand, holding it tight.

  “Don’t.” He rasps out. I look up at him and see the torment in his eyes.

  “Just tonight?” I whisper.

  His eyes widen slightly and drop to my lips. He licks his lips and then nods. He swoops down capturing my lips and we both groan in satisfaction. His mouth is magic. He places his hands on my waist, not moving them. I grab his hand and guide it under my sweatshirt. I place it on my breast and moan into his mouth.

  It’s enough for him to stop being so careful. He takes the lead and touches me in all the right places. Our mouths never stop kissing, our lips, necks, chest…

  Suddenly, he stops.

  “Enough. We have to stop.” He commands.

  “Why?”

  “We can’t.” He lies back down on his back, away from me.

  “Why? Why can’t we?” I demand an answer. I don’t understand what changed between us.

  “I don’t want you.”

  “You could have fooled me.”

  “Charleigh just stop. I’ll stay here tonight but go to sleep.” He says, curling onto his side facing away from me. I take the hint and I should just be glad he is staying.

  I turn over on my side facing away from him. I let the tears silently fall down my cheeks.

  “Asher?”

  “Mmmhmmm?” He mumbles.

  “Why do guys want to hurt me?” I ask. I hear his sharp intake. Silence follows.

  “Asher?”

  “I don’t know, Charleigh. Go to sleep.”

  “Why does everyone I love leave me?”

  “What are talking about?”

  “My dad left me. My mom said she legally took me away, but still he didn’t fight for me. He just left.”

  “Your mom is a selfish bitch who doesn’t care who she hurts.” Asher says it with so much anger and hate.

  “I know. I wish…”

  “Charleigh, forget her and focus on the ones that love you.”

  “No one loves me.” I turn over to look at him, but his back is still facing me. Please tell me you love me, I silently beg.

  “That’s not true. You’re drunk and not thinking clearly.”

  “Name someone that loves me.” Say you do, say you do…

  “Michael.” He says. I exhale in disappointment.

  “Yes, you’re right, but he is the only one. Everyone else leaves me or tries to hurt me.”

  “We didn’t leave you.” He states.

  “I beg to differ. You left me here in this hell hole and now my nightmare is my new stepdad.”

  “Charleigh, if Tim ever tries anything again, come to me or Michael. In fact, I’ll put the ladder back if it helps.”

  “Thanks, but you won’t be here forever.”

  “No, but we are here until you are eighteen. Leave her behind, Charleigh.”

  “Where would I go?”

  “Find your father.” I think about his response. Why did I not think of that?

  “Thanks, Ash.”

  At least the old Asher is still in there somewhere. When we were younger, Asher would set the ladder next to his window and I would climb into his room. I would sleep on his floor to avoid my mom’s abuse or her revolving door of creepy boyfriends.

  “Now, go to sleep.”

  I finally fall into a light slumber but waken when I feel my hair being touched.

  “You are so beautiful, and I wish you would get out of my head.” Ash whispers into the darkness.

  I even my breathing out, hoping he will say more, but he doesn’t. What does he mean? Eventually, I fall asleep to him playing with my hair.

  I wake up the next morning and I find myself lying on top of Asher. I peek up and see his beautiful face looking so peaceful in sleep. His arms are draped over my back and I stay still enjoying the moment. When I peek back up, his piercing eyes are staring back at me. We lay there for just a moment before he pushes me off of him.

  He doesn’t say a word. He gets off the bed and stands there with his back to me.

  “Asher?” I say his name softly. He glances back to look at me.

  “Thank you.”

  “Yeah, see you around.” With that he walks out of the room. I huff out in annoyance. Why is he so stubborn and why do I want him even more?

  I get off the bed and curse myself for drinking so much. My head is pounding. I hurry through a shower and change my clothes. I leave my hair wet and run a brush through it. I need caffeine immediately.

  I come down the stairs and the sight before me makes me shake my head in disgust. There are passed out bodies everywhere. Trash is covering every surface. This is going to take forever to clean. I push some empty beer
cans out of the way and make my espresso. No one even moves.

  After taking some meds and downing the caffeine, I feel a little more human. I grab a bottle of water, leaving the house and mess behind. I pop in my earbuds and start jogging down the street. I glance behind me and see that the outside of the house is trashed as well. I roll my eyes in disgust. Michael is cleaning this shit up.

  I take my normal route and return to the house an hour later. The cars are gone and when I enter the house, no one is there. I hear Michael and Asher yelling at each other in the kitchen. I walk in there, trying not to notice how hot Asher looks. He glances at me and then continues yelling at Michael.

  “This is a PR nightmare! There are pictures all over the internet! I thought you said you had it under control?” Asher yells.

  “I thought I did.” Michael says, putting his head between his hands in defeat.

  “Well, obviously not. Now, Liz is calling every two minutes, chewing my ass out.”

  “What are the pictures of?” I ask, jumping up on the counter.

  I swing my legs back and forth. I catch Ash following the movement. I swear he is checking me out. When his eyes reach mine, I give him a smirk. He glares at me and turns his attention back to Michael.

  “Never mind, I’ll take care of it, like always.” He says and storms out of the room. A few seconds later we hear the front door slam. Michael flinches at the sound.

  “Trouble in paradise?” I ask.

  “I messed up. I really thought that no one would take pictures.”

  “It’s not every day that you get to party with rock stars. It was bound to happen.”

  “Why can’t we just be normal?” He asks and I laugh.

  “How bad is it?” I ask and he hands me his phone.

  I scroll through the pictures. The headline is The Orphans Gone Wild?

  There is a picture of Natalie on Asher’s lap and Michael kissing a senior named Lyla. There are more of them drinking alcohol and it looks like a crazy party. Oh shit…. there I am on the coffee table.

  “This isn’t that bad….”

  “Keep scrolling.”

  “Oh shit! Michael!!!”

  There he is snorting cocaine off the same coffee table I was dancing on. Then one of him with a different girl taking a selfie with him passed out on the couch.

  “When did you start doing this?” I ask, pissed.