Heart of Gold

by J. R. Ward

  “Getting squeamish all of a sudden?”

  Wessex stared across the desk and found himself wondering how someone that young got to be that hard.

  “So are you in or not?” Nick’s words were curt.

  “I’m in,” Wessex answered slowly. “But I do think you should reconsider—”

  “Whatever I do to the damn thing after I own it is no one’s business but my own.”

  Nick picked up the phone and Wessex knew he’d been dismissed. As he stood up and straightened his blazer, he wished there was some way to reach out to the younger man.

  “Have a good trip back to the city,” Nick told him as he dialed. “And you should remind Packert to enjoy the limousine. When I get done with him, he’ll be lucky if he can afford cab fare.”

  Wessex was deep in thought as he left the study, wondering what had happened between his daughter and Nick. Going by the vengeful expression on the man’s face, it seemed unlikely things had been resolved.

  As he turned the corner into the dining room, he ran into Packert. Looking into the Texan’s eyes, he winced a little, thinking about what was coming the man’s way.

  “What’s wrong with you?” Packert asked, carrying a plate laden with food from a buffet set up on the sideboard.

  Wessex wasn’t about to explain that the man’s net worth was about to go to zero.

  “Forgive me,” he replied evenly. “I’m a bit distracted.”

  “Well, cheer up! We’re getting out of here today.” The Texan clapped him on the shoulder with a meaty hand. “Say, you’re a little on the thin side. You best eat up before we head off.”

  Wessex became aware of a pounding between his ears and decided that lunch with Packert wasn’t going to improve the headache. Making an excuse, he escaped out a side door into the balmy, summer air. With no particular destination in mind, he headed down to the lake and found some solace in the sound of the waves lapping against the rocky shore. In the aftermath of the storm, everything smelled fresh and lush, and he took deep breaths as he walked along the shoreline. When his wandering took him over to the boathouse, he went out onto the dock, his sleek loafers clipping against the damp wood. Clasping his hands behind his back, he leaned forward and looked down into the water.

  As the fish swam by, he was thinking of the past. And wondering with a sad ache whether he would see his daughter again.

  Up at the mansion, from the porch outside the bedroom she’d been given, Carter watched her father’s promenade.

  Despite her exhaustion, she’d been unable to sleep. She’d stayed in bed until frustration had gotten the best of her. Opening a pair of French doors wide, she’d stepped outside, taking her discontent with her into the sunlight.

  The first thing she’d noticed was her father’s slow progress down to the shore. With his hands linked behind his back, and his head down as if he were deep in thought, he strolled over the grass. She’d watched as he went out onto the dock.

  Carter made up her mind. Moving quickly, she went inside, got dressed, and made up the bed. She was out of the house a moment later, treading over the same lawn her father had just crossed.

  He turned when he heard her footsteps on the dock. Surprise and hope flickered over his features.

  “The water is really clear, isn’t it?” Carter said casually as she came up beside him.

  “Yes. Quite remarkably so.” His smile held a tentative welcome. He glanced at her hand. “How does it feel?”

  She wiggled her fingers. “As well as it could, I suppose.”

  She wasn’t sure what to say next and neither was he, apparently. They stood a few feet apart and looked into the water.

  “You’re going back to the city now?” she asked in a soft voice.

  “As soon as Packert is finished with lunch. He has the alarming alacrity of a fast eater but the portion control of a gorilla. It could be a while.”

  Carter smiled slightly, glancing over at him.

  “I was very worried about you last night,” Wessex told her after a pause.

  “I can’t say I enjoyed the experience, but it turned out all right in the end.” Abruptly, she was struck by an idea. “Have you seen what’s upstairs here?”

  “No.”

  “You’ve got to take a look at this,” she said with sudden urgency, leading him inside the boathouse and up the cramped set of stairs.

  When they got to the second floor and he saw the train set, Wessex let out a delighted whistle.

  “I had the same reaction when I first saw it.” Carter went over and flipped the master switch.

  The miniature world came to life. Lights glowed in shop windows. Steam began to come out of tiny smokestacks. Water started to trickle down the mountainside. Fingering the controls, she sent a train along the tracks.

  They fell into talk about the cars and the setup, a relaxed conversation that surprised her. It made her remember how easy talking to her father had once been. And it made her miss him.

  They enjoyed the grown-up toy until she noticed that the sun had spun over to a much lower angle.

  “Do you know what time it is?” Carter asked.

  Wessex glanced at a gold watch on his wrist. “Good Lord, it’s past three. I should have been getting into the limo with that odious man hours ago.”

  Carter drew back on the throttle, bringing the engine to a smooth stop in front of her. She didn’t want to turn the power off. She didn’t want to leave the room. She didn’t want to go back to the way things had been.

  But she wasn’t sure where to take them.

  As the twinkling lights went out, her father said, “This has been wonderful.”

  She found herself agreeing with him. “Are our trains still in the billiards room?”

  “They are. Just the same as when you…”

  He didn’t finish.

  “I remember the way they looked,” she said, wanting to pull him away from painful memories. “Is that mountain range still halfway done?”

  “Yes.”

  The two headed down the stairway.

  “Maybe I should come by sometime, when I’m in the city.”

  Her father’s steps faltered. “I would be so happy to see you.”

  Carter smiled in the dim light.

  Together, they stepped out into the sunshine. As they walked toward the mansion, their steps were slow over the grass.

  Abruptly, she stopped and faced her father. “I’m glad you came up yesterday.”

  She watched, stunned, as a shine of tears appeared in his eyes. Instinctually, she reached out to comfort him. As her hand settled on his arm, he held on to it.

  “Do you know that your mother and I loved you? As best we could? That I still love you so much now?”

  “Don’t cry,” she told him softly as he fumbled for his handkerchief. While he wiped his eyes, she could feel some kind of thread taking hold between them. Some kind of gossamer-thin tie. They stood together for a long time, silently coming closer.

  When they finally went into the house, they found Gertie arranging flowers in the front hall. She informed them that Packert had already left for the city and Wessex would have to take the train back. Carter offered to drive him to the station.

  While her father went upstairs to get his things, she watched Gertie’s gnarled hands work some fragrant lilac blossoms.

  “He’s a good man, your father,” the woman pronounced, “from what I’ve seen of him. You two get to spend much time together?”

  “It’ll be more now.” Carter was amazed that she wanted to see him again. It had seemed like such an impossibility just days before and yet so much had changed. Everything, it seemed, had changed.

  Her father reappeared with his black, monogrammed suitcase. “Where’s our host?”

  “Behind you,” Nick said, materializing in the foyer. He was dressed in a tuxedo but wearing boat shoes.

  Carter jerked at the sound of his voice and searched out his eyes. They passed over her as if she wasn’t there, a
nd that hurt, even though she told herself it shouldn’t. She also couldn’t help noticing how wide his shoulders were underneath the black jacket, how the white of the shirt contrasted with his tanned skin, how tall and imposing he was.

  “A bit formal for a sail, don’t you think?” Wessex offered a smile that wasn’t returned.

  “There’s a benefit tonight at Winnie and Curt Thorndyke’s down the lake. I told Curt I’d help with roasting the pig. Man wouldn’t know a good pit from a pendulum.”

  The words were casual but cold.

  “I know Thorndyke,” Wessex said. “His wife is very horsy. Members of the Borealis, aren’t they?”

  “That’s the one.” Nick stretched out a hand. “Safe trip. I’ll be in touch.”

  “Thank you…” Wessex hesitated as they shook, glancing over at Carter. “For everything.”

  With a harsh smile, Nick turned away. “My pleasure.”

  As the door shut, Carter watched him through the screen. He pushed his hands into his pockets and sauntered down to the lake, looking as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

  She felt bereft at his nonchalance, at the sense that she was so utterly forgettable.

  Which was ridiculous, she told herself angrily. Now was hardly the time for her ego to raise its head. Self-preservation had to trump the id. It just had to.

  Still, she found it hard not to curse as she and her father went out to the Jeep.

  While they were scaling the mountain roads, he asked about the dig and what they were trying to find. She was relieved by the distraction.

  “We’re investigating the Winship party.”

  “Quite a piece of American history. How much longer will you be up there?”

  “A couple of weeks. Maybe less.” She wondered whether her father had picked up on the ache in her voice. She sure had heard it.

  “Do you love him, Carter?” The question was spoken with softness and compassion.

  She looked across at her father, meeting his vibrant blue eyes. “I don’t have a lot of experience with being in love, but I’ve got to imagine it’s the only thing that hurts this much.”

  His expression grew thoughtful. “I’ve known Farrell personally for the past few years, known of him since he came to Wall Street. He’s a hard man,” Wessex reflected. “A good one, I believe, but very hard. It would take an extraordinary woman to capture his heart.”

  Pain seared at the thought of the next woman Nick was going to have. “Well, I’m sure she’s out there somewhere.”

  “He thinks he’s already found her.”

  Carter shook her head. “Not anymore. I cured him of his misconception. He’ll move on. I’ll…get through it somehow.”

  Carter changed the subject, feeling grateful when her father let it drop.

  When they pulled up to the train station, she waited with him on the platform until the 4:19 pulled in with a squeal of brakes and a hiss. Suddenly there wasn’t any more time.

  In a rush, she wrapped her arms around her father, holding him close.

  “I had almost given up hope,” he said as he held her tight.

  “Bye-bye,” she said softly as they parted. “I’ll see you soon.”

  Wessex closed his eyes, as if a wish of his had been granted. Then he kissed her on the forehead and mounted the three steps into the railcar. As the train pulled away, Carter watched him settle in a seat next to the window. She waved back at him as he disappeared down the tracks.

  19

  WHEN CARTER returned to the ruined campsite, her strength drained out of the soles of her feet. Everything was in disarray, soaking wet, and covered in mud. Tree limbs were down or hanging at crazy angles and the big pine was already wilting.

  She looked at her bandaged injury and felt handicapped.

  As she was wondering where to start, Buddy, Ellie, and Cort came back from the circle of stones.

  “Looks like you had quite a party up here last night,” her partner quipped. “So what’d the doctor say about your hand? Are you okay?”

  “I’ll be good as new in a couple weeks.” She looked around the campsite. “Which is a shame because I need the thing to work right now. We’ve got some serious digging out ahead of us.”

  Cort beamed. “With all the mess up here, I guess you’re going to have to stay down at my house for a while.”

  “You think your uncle will mind having two beautiful ladies under his roof?” Buddy asked.

  “Two?” Carter interjected sharply. “Make that one. I’m staying up here.”

  Her friend frowned. “Don’t be ridiculous. You’re injured.”

  When Carter shot him a determined look, Buddy hitched up his baggy pants with a playful snort and turned to the teenagers. “Looks like the little woman and I are going to have us a talk. While we’re gone, why don’t you pour out the tents and hang up everything you can.”

  “We don’t need to talk about this,” Carter protested. “I’ve made up my—”

  “Shall we?” Buddy offered her a long look and his arm.

  With a side comment about heavy-handed men, Carter shrugged him off and marched into the woods.

  When they were out of earshot, she put her hands on her hips. “We can’t leave this place unattended—you know that. And Ellie needs you.”

  “She was worried about the storm last night but she’ll be fine as long as we don’t have any more typhoons.” Buddy’s voice was level, sensible. “Look, I know sleeping down there is not the best because of…but I’m worried about your health. That’s a hell of a cut and you should really think of yourself as down for repairs.”

  “I’ll be fine up here,” she countered doggedly.

  “With that injury, you’re useless if anyone comes poking around. It really makes more sense for me to stay. It’s safer for everyone.”

  As creative as Carter was, she couldn’t argue with that one. What was she going to do if someone—if Lyst—came up in the middle of the night? Scare him off with some flashy, one-handed moves with a thighbone? If she did go down to the mansion, at least she could sleep in a real bed and take long showers to ease all her aches and pains.

  Well, at least the ones in her body.

  She thought about how Nick had looked at her in his foyer. His eyes had been so aloof, and her disappointment was both inappropriate and disconcerting. What did she expect? She’d pushed him away, for all the right reasons, and he’d gone back to being the cold man she’d met when she first walked into his house. What did she think was going to happen? He was going to keep pining away for her forever? Rot in a chair in a darkened room from heartbreak?

  Yes, Carter thought. That was what she wanted him to do. She wanted to know that he was suffering like she was or at least for him to look as if he were having a hard time. She didn’t want him wearing a tuxedo and going to a party. It just wasn’t fair. Her life was a mess and he was going to go roast a damn pig.

  Buddy snapped his fingers in front of her. “Hello? Anyone in there?”

  “All right. I’ll go down,” Carter grumbled, resigning herself.

  “Good. By the way, do you mind if I sleep in your tent? Mine is mercifully leak free, but we’re not going to be able to move the stuff out until we resurrect Papercut Central.”

  “Fine with me.”

  When she and Buddy returned to camp, Cort and Ellie had turned the place into a laundry room. Sleeping bags, towels, and clothes were hanging from lines they’d tied between trees, and the tents had been resurrected.

  “Interesting decor,” Buddy cracked. “Early clothes hamper tinted with a whimsical vision. I like it.”

  They were talking about what to tackle next when Cort checked his watch and grew grim. “I have to go.”

  Ellie smiled at him. “If you can wait a little while, I’ll just finish—”

  “No, I have to go now. I’ll see you down there for dinner.”

  After he left quickly, Ellie looked over at Carter with disappointed eyes. “I just don’t understand men
.”

  Carter put a sympathetic hand on the girl’s shoulder. “I’d like to tell you that wisdom comes from experience with them.”

  “But you’d be lying?”

  “Precisely.”

  “Now, wait a minute,” Buddy countered. “As the lone representative of my gender, I have to take umbrage at that. Trying to figure you women out is impossible. Like picking linguine off the floor with a magnet.”

  “Dad, that metaphor sucks.”

  Carter smiled. “Ellie, I’d also like to tell you that wisdom comes to them with experience.”

  “But it doesn’t, right?”

  “Precisely.”

  The three of them spent the remaining daylight tackling the mess at Papercut Central. Thanks to a chain saw Ivan had lent him, Buddy cut up the pine tree and cleared it into the woods. When he was finished, Ellie and Carter helped rehang the tarp. Although the table was in bad shape, they managed to hammer it back into usable condition.

  When they finally went down the mountain, they were greeted at the house with a meal prepared by Gertie. Cort, who looked happy to see Ellie, made a point of sitting next to the girl. After dinner, the two went to watch the only TV in the house, and Buddy headed back up to camp.

  Left to her own devices, Carter retired to the peach bedroom and changed into silk pajamas, a rare luxury on a dig. Experience had proven that there was always one point in any project when living in the dirt and sleeping on the ground got to be too much. Tonight was the night, and she figured she deserved the treat after all she’d been through. Before she turned in, she stepped out onto the porch to look at the stars.

  The night air brushed against her skin and she watched as moonlight danced across the lake. A whippoorwill, tripping through his solo and starting over, again and again, made her wish she had someone to share the moment with.

  But not just anyone.

  Where was he now? she wondered. The image that came to mind, of him holding some other woman close, made her wince.

  Leaving the doors wide-open, she went back inside and crawled between the butter-soft sheets. She closed her eyes. Fidgeted. Tossed. Punched the pillow with her good hand. It was a long time before she fell asleep.