A Safe Surrender: A Donnelley Brother's Novel (Donnelley Brothers Book 2)

by Carbonneau, Alannah

  I groaned before adding hopefully. “March can be nice.”

  “Yeah,” she nodded. “If you live anywhere else in the world but lovely Alberta.”

  My eyes turned deadpan as I glared at her. “You’re determined to kill my hope.”

  “Just telling it how it is.” She said sweetly, but bluntly, and I rolled my eyes.

  “Do you ever tell it any other way?” I asked as I pulled my shirt over my head, clipping my chin roughly in the process. I hissed in a breath and flinched at the feel of the pressure against my tender flesh.

  Tossing the shirt into my bag, Ember gasped. “Oh shit,” she crossed the distance between us in a flash.

  Reaching up, she ran her hands over what I was assuming were now visible bruises. Glancing down at the workout shirt in my bag, I groaned at the sight of the cover-up staining the light pink material.

  “Ember,” I pushed her hand away. “Please don’t.”

  “Did this happen last night?” She demanded, pinning me with determined eyes. “Tell me the truth, Kami.”

  “Yeah,” I nodded, pulling my t-shirt over my head as I walked to the mirror with my bag of makeup. I seriously hated wearing this crap, but Rhett left me with little to no choice.

  “What happened?”

  “He came home late and drunk.” I shrugged. “It’s what always happens.”

  “He didn’t,” she frowned. “He didn’t do anything else, did he?”

  “Why do you ask?” My eyes connected to hers in the mirror. Goosebumps prickled my flesh and my heart raced at an uncomfortable pace.

  “You’re not usually this flippant about it. You’re acting like it doesn’t even matter.” She said quietly. “So, I’m asking, did he do anything else?”

  Sighing, I debated on lying to Ember, but then I decided against it. She deserved the truth. I was leaving him - soon. I just didn’t know when or how yet, but I’d figure it out eventually.

  “Yeah.” I nodded, feeling so deeply ashamed. “He did something else.”

  She pulled in a shaky breath, but held her eyes on me. “Tell me.”

  I frowned at her in the mirror. “I’d rather not.”

  “If you don’t tell me, I’ll confront him about it, Kami.” She threatened and I tensed. Because as much as I didn’t want to talk about this - I knew Ember. No one scared her. She would go to Rhett and she would confront him. And then I would be in trouble.

  “I don’t really know how to explain what happened.” I snapped, closing my eyes to keep the tears from falling. “I guess - I guess he forced himself on me.”

  “He raped you.” I barely even heard her words. Opening my eyes, I saw that her hand was covering her mouth and her eyes were wide and misted. “I’m so sorry.”

  Again, I shrugged. “I understand the power of lust better than most people, Ember.” My tone was bitter, but when you had a past like mine, it was hard not to be. “It shouldn’t be a surprise. Rhett’s been cracking for a while, crossing lines - changing. I should have anticipated it.”

  “Sweetie,” she shook her head, reaching out for me with her tender touch. It was too much. Too soft. I was too ashamed.

  I stepped away from her, feeling suddenly tense. “My mother was a stripper. She induced lust that was never satisfied and she was murdered for it, Ember. Don’t sweetie me, and don’t try and make it into something it’s not. I know what happened is wrong, but I’m just as at fault as Rhett.” I knew my next words were going to break her heart, but I said them anyway. “I didn’t even fight him.”

  Ember shook her head and I watched her desperate eyes search my face. “You can’t seriously think you’re to blame for this, Kamilla. That’s fucking bullshit and you know it.” She ran a hand through her hair, seeing right through my defensive tone. Ember always saw through my defense and right down to the raw, bleeding source, of my pain. “You’ve got to leave him.”

  “And go where?” I cried, raising my hands.

  I’d finally cracked. Ember, the one person who knew me better than Rhett, had made me crack. All my cool calm control just went right out the window. Emotion threatened to drown me. My throat was tight and the air that existed around me made me feel as though it was a moment away from suffocating me. It was life, but in this moment, its weight was threatening. And I was terrified.

  “You can stay with me.” She said sternly.

  “Your place is the first place Rhett is going to go to look for me. When I leave him, I can’t chance going somewhere he’ll find me, Ember.” I blinked and the tears that had so desperately longed to fall slid down my cheeks. Ember sighed, pulling me into her arms even against my struggle. “He’ll never let me go willingly. I don’t know how to leave him or where to go.”

  Giving into her determined affection, I fell against her chest, before my arms circled around her body and I held her tight. I held onto Ember with a desperation that said she was my one and only lifeline. I knew my hold on her was a painful one. My arms were locked so impossibly tight around her small frame, but not once did she protest or wince. She didn’t pull away or even wiggle in my arms to relieve some of the pressure of my arms. Instead, like the admirably strong woman she was, she held me just as tight. She let me know she was there for me. That I could hold onto her as long as I needed to.

  And I cried in her arms.

  I cried because despite the loss I had faced in this cruel world, I had gained someone like Ember who possessed not only the strength to pull me to my feet when I was too beat down to pull myself up, but the spirit I needed in my life to show me that there was another way.

  “You can’t stay with him, sweetie.” She pulled back to catch my eyes with hers - ensuring I understood her words. “It’s too dangerous.”

  I sobbed at the complete and utter hopelessness of my situation. I was terrified and hurting and I had nowhere to turn. I had no family. Rhett and Ember were all I had - they were the only two people I’d allowed inside my heart after my mother’s murder. And now Rhett wasn’t a safe place. He was a danger, and eventually, if I remained with him, my fate would be my mothers.

  Chapter 2

  “I have an idea.” Ember announced, glancing up at her phone and grinning. Her eyes were glowing brightly and her cheeks were puffed in excitement as she waved the piece of technology at me.

  I peeked at her phone before my eyes flickered back up to hers and I frowned. “What?”

  “You know that Ranch I spend a week at every summer riding horses?”

  I nodded slowly, still not understanding where she was going with this. “The Wild something or other?”

  “The Donnelley’s Wild Land Tours.” She corrected promptly.

  “What about it?” I asked with hesitation.

  “They’re hiring.” She waved her phone again. “I saw the ad a while back. I have them on my Facebook and Twitter. The ads right here.”

  I held out my hand, feeling my heart race with the forbidden hope of a way out. And the fear of leaving the only life I’d ever built to start over from scratch. “Can I see it?”

  She nodded. “Absolutely!”

  Glancing down at her screen, I began reading through the ad posted into her Facebook feed. With every sentence my eyes gobbled up, I felt something that resembled relief form inside of me and I knew that my leaving Rhett was possible. It was the right thing to do, and as intimidating as it was, it had to be done. If I didn’t put myself out there, nothing would change.

  The Donnelley Ranch is NOW HIRING for Wild Land Tour Guides!

  Wild Land Tours is a family run business, offering guided tours through the wild Alberta Mountains. We’re located an hour outside of Banff. We offer many services, including lessons on mountain climbing, white water rafting, horseback riding, and lengthy expeditions into the wild. At the Donnelley Ranch, we strive to find peace from everyday life in the steady calm of the wild. We offer cabins for our guests to rent while they stay at the Donnelley Ranch, but we also offer areas for our guests to camp by tent or RV.


  We’re looking to hire for a few positions, mainly females who either are experienced in mountain climbing, white water rafting, or horseback riding. We’re looking for experience, however drive and desire will always triumph over experience here at the Donnelley Ranch.

  If you’re interested and can show your desire to be part of our team, we would be willing to provide you with the training you’ll need to excel here at the Donnelley Ranch.

  You can contact my colleague, Reese James, for an interview at the email or phone number below, or me, Gracie Donnelley.

  We look forward to hearing from you.

  By the time I was finished reading through the ad a second, and then a third time, I was determined.

  Glancing up at Ember, I asked. “Can I use your phone?”

  She grinned, support shining through her eyes. “Make the call, sweetie.”

  ***

  “Good afternoon, Gracie Donnelley speaking.” An older woman answered the phone and I swore I could hear my heart pounding in my ears.

  “Hello, Gracie. My name is Kamilla Reyes and I’m calling about your ad for hire.”

  “Oh, lovely!” She exclaimed into the phone, making me feel a little less nervous with her bright, contagious enthusiasm. “Do you have any experience?”

  “Oh, um, not really.” I replied uncomfortably. “But I really want a shot at a position with you and your ad said that experience wasn’t as important as drive if I wanted to learn. You wouldn’t even have to pay me until I know what I’m doing. I can do anything you want me to do,”

  She interrupted me with a chuckle. “You certainly sound driven, Kamilla. Do you have a preference for what you’d like to learn? White water rafting? Mountain climbing? Horseback riding?”

  “Um, not really. I actually have never done any of those things.”

  “That’s interesting.”

  “What’s interesting?” I breathed into the phone.

  “That you’re so desperate for a position to do something you’ve never even tried.” She replied without missing a beat.

  “I,” I didn’t know what to say to that. “I like to learn. And I’m looking for a different pace of life.”

  I thought I heard a smile. “I’m going to say, that tentatively, you’re hired, Kamilla. I’d like to meet you tomorrow morning if you can get here - I’m not sure where you’re calling from.”

  “I can be there.” I announced before I’d thought it through, but once the words were out, I didn’t regret them. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”

  “Perfect.” Gracie said. “I’ll see you then, Kamilla.”

  “Goodbye.”

  Hanging up the phone, I stared dazedly at Ember. She was holding her breath and her eyes were wide. When she finally spoke, she gave a small squeal. “Oh my goodness! You agreed to an interview for tomorrow morning!”

  “I did.” I stated numbly. “Holy crap!” I slapped my hand over my mouth. “That’s like a seven hour drive.”

  “Uh,” she nodded. “You’d better get packing.”

  Those words made reality sink in and my shoulders fell. “I can’t do this.”

  “You can.” Ember pulled my hands into hers and she squeezed. “Go home, pack your clothes, and get out of here.”

  “But,”

  “If you make excuses now, you’ll always make them, Kami.” Her tone was pleading. “Just go.”

  Tears misted my eyes and I nodded. “What about my jobs?”

  “I’ll take care of it all, sweetie. I’ll call in tomorrow morning so there’s no tipping off Rhett.” She glanced down at her watch. “You have three hours until Rhett is off work. If you’re going to make it, you’ve gotta leave now.”

  Tears slipped down my cheeks as I stared into her warm green eyes. “Will you visit me?”

  “Every chance I get.” She promised. “And we’ll talk on the phone all the time.”

  I nodded, pulling her tight against my chest. “I love you.”

  “I love you too, sweetie.” She squeezed me tight before releasing me much too fast. “Now get going!”

  I flicked my tears and walked to the back door. I didn’t look back, not once, as the door swung closed behind me.

  ***

  Pulling my little yellow, black, and white polka dot suitcase from the closet, I piled it with every article of clothing I could squeeze into it before hauling it from the house and tossing it into my trunk. It was 1:30 p.m. and I had never been more afraid of Rhett coming home early as I was in this moment. Running back into the house, I piled my shoes into a box before throwing the rest of my clothing into a matching polka dot suitcase. I didn’t have many keepsakes, but the ones I did have I piled into my arms before taking one last look around the house. For the first time, I saw it for what it was - a dump.

  I couldn’t help but pride myself for my refusal to put my name on the lease when Rhett and I had rented. I had no ties or responsibilities to remain here. I could leave and I never had to look back.

  With my car loaded, I shoved my key into the ignition and backed out of the driveway. As my tires claimed the asphalt, I thought of Rhett and how we’d began.

  ...Music pulsed from inside the house as I followed Jana up the walkway, a girl staying in the same foster house as me. I’d been with the Preston’s for six weeks now, but Jana had been with them for years. She adored Mrs. Preston, but like most pretty girls, she didn’t like Mr. Preston. Thankfully, I hadn’t caught Mr. Preston’s eye. He thought I was too fucked up to mess around with being that my mother was murdered the way she was.

  For spending so many years in the foster system, I was really very lucky that I hadn’t been abused sexually. Most children, male and female, who were in the system, had been abused at some point in their lives.

  “Are you sure we should be here?” I asked hesitantly, catching the sleeve of Jana’s coat. “It looks pretty crazy.”

  Jana sighed, turning to face me. “I brought you because no one else is home but Mr. Preston. Don’t be a baby, Kami. You’re fifteen. You’re not a little girl anymore.”

  I frowned. “I’m not a baby.”

  “Then what are you afraid of?” Jana tapped her toe and I felt a blush stain my cheeks.

  I grappled for an answer, and came up blank. “I don’t know.”

  She linked her fingers through mine. “Let’s go. I’ll be with you the whole time.” She flashed me a smile. “You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

  “Kay,”

  Jana didn’t knock on the door of the house. Instead, she walked right in, her eyes zeroing in on a guy playing pool. There was so much smoke in the air that I could barely see through the fog. A faint scent of marijuana tickled my nose and I bit back a sneeze.

  Jana leaned down to speak against my ear. “See that guy playing pool?” She yelled over the base pounding through the airwaves. “I’m gonna go talk to him.”

  My heart raced. “What am I supposed to do?”

  Jana spun around, smiling brightly, “Flirt, dance - I don’t really care.”

  I watched her move across the house to the man playing pool and wondered just how old he was. Jana was seventeen, but the man looked much older. Twenty-three, maybe twenty-four?

  The music was so loud I could barely hear myself think. Bodies were grinding together in the living room, sweaty and undoubtedly intoxicated. People were making out on the sofa - their hands wandering to places no one had ever touched me.

  My face flamed bright red as I averted my eyes to anywhere else. It wasn’t long before I found that my toes were the safest place to look. Leaning against the wall, I admired my socked feet with the little cartoon characters smiling goofily up at me.

  “Nice socks.” A deep voice sounded in my ear and I jumped, looking up into water-blue eyes.

  My heart stuttered as I took in his appearance. His hair was long and shaggy blond - like a surfer’s and his eyes were framed in thick blond lashes. He was tall, towering over my five foot four inches and his should
ers were broad. I could tell by the glass of his eyes that he was either drinking or doing drugs - but he seemed nice enough and I didn’t know anyone at this party.

  “Hi.” I said shyly.

  He grinned, cocking his head to the side as he studied me through those stunning eyes. “What’s your name?”

  “Kami,”

  He held out his hand, and uncertainly, I placed mine in his. “Hello, Kami,” he shook my hand, but didn’t let it go. “I’m Rhett.”

  “Rhett?” I smiled. “That’s different.”

  “So is Kami.”

  “It’s Kamilla.” I stated. “Kami’s short.”

  “I like it.” He licked his lips and my heart raced. “I like you, Kami.”

  I tried to ignore my racing pulse as I struggled to reply. “You don’t know me.”

  He cocked his head. “Not yet. But I will know you.” He brought my hand up to his lips. “And I’ll make you mine.”

  I didn’t say anything as I stared up at this handsome creature. Never before had anyone spoken such words to me. Never before had anyone made me want to belong to another the way Rhett did.

  And I didn’t even know him...

  Tightening my hand on the steering wheel, I shook my head at fifteen-year-old Kami and seventeen year old Rhett. He had been such a smooth talker then, sweeping me right off my feet. But the reality was very different. He’d sensed my insecurities then and like the vulture he was, he’d pounced. I couldn’t help it, I was blaming it all on the socks. If I hadn’t worn those damn childlike socks, I might never have attracted Rhett.

  But if I hadn’t had Rhett, what would the last seven years of my life been like? Although he’d become a danger to me, he hadn’t always been that way. He used to be my safe place - his arms used to protect me.

  Once upon a time, I thought Rhett would do anything for me. Fifteen-year-old Kami never would have thought, for even a moment, that Rhett was capable of the horrors he’d enacted last night.

  But that Kami was gone. This Kami was ready to take control of her life and the first step was leaving.

  Chapter 3

  I pulled into the Banff Inn and prayed they had a room. People were everywhere, lugging ski’s and snowboard’s through the snow, checking into rooms, and congregating in cherry cheeked masses as they recounted the fun of their day on the ski slopes with an animation I couldn’t help but admire.