by Shan
“Spend the night with me back at my room.”
I wanted to say no say bad because I knew this could get us in a world of trouble, but I just wanted to be with Jaheim. I missed his touch and honestly hadn’t stopped thinking about the last time he was inside of me.
“What bout your dad and what about Tamar? What if they find out?”
“I guess I’ll be a dead man. You better get this dick while I’m still alive,” Jaheim joked as he grabbed at his pants and bit down on his bottom lip. “Least if I die, it’ll behind some of the best pussy I’d ever had.”
I laughed and then pushed Jaheim back. He always found a way to make me laugh and I loved that about him. He picked me up from the ground and we kissed again before I agreed to go back to his room with him.
***
I stirred around in my sleep after feeling a cool breeze hitting my leg. I rolled over onto my side to lay back onto Jaheim’s chest. I didn’t know what it was, but something didn’t feel right. I could hear the wind blowing and I didn’t remember Jaheim leaving the doors to the hotel’s room balcony open. I started to get up in bed when I heard a clicking sound and then…
POW!
“Aaghhhh!” I screamed out. I jumped down off of the bed and tried to get away. I could hear the gun clicking over and over again, but thank God nothing was happening. I peeked over the side of the bed and could see them coming towards me. With nowhere to go, I backed away towards the wall, while they aimed at me and pulled the trigger numerous times.
POW! POW!
The gunman ran towards the balcony as Jaheim continued to fire at their back. I could tell that he had hit them because I could see where there were drops of blood leading from the end of the bed and all the way outside. I jumped up from the corner and ran over to the balcony to close and lock it before they came back.
“Fuck, I left that damn door open when I went out to smoke a couple of hours ago,” Jaheim groaned as he reached for his chest. I ran over to him and pulled his hand away. There was a tiny hole that had blood spilling from it like a faucet. I jumped out of the bed and ran into the bathroom to gather up all of the towels that I could. This shit had Tamar’s name written all over it. Shit. I knew I should’ve just stayed my hot ass away from this man. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself he died on me.
Rushing back to Jaheim, I placed the towels over his wound and applied pressure to it. He flinched from the pain and immediately; blood soaked through the towels and covered my hands.
“Hold that right there. I gotta call an ambulance.”
“Call them and leave,” he told me and I looked at him like he was crazy.
“What?” I asked to make sure I was hearing him clearly.
“Call the ambulance and leave. I can’t be caught with you ma’, you know that.”
I let out a huge sigh and called 911 from the hotel’s phone. I gave the operator the hotel’s information and all the information that I had on Jaheim. I quickly put on my clothes, gathered my things, and checked on Jaheim once more.
“Please don’t die on me, Jaheim. Please. I can wait with you until they get here.”
“Hell no, my pops—my pops find out I came out here just to see you, that nigga’s gonna fuck me up. And I don’t want you in no type of trouble behind me. If it’s meant for us to be together we’ll figure something out. Get out of here.”
“I can’t believe he did this. He told me that he was cool with me talking to somebody and then he turns around and shoot you.”
“I know you ain’t blind baby.”
“What do you mean?”
“Whoever the fuck shot me got a bad fuckin’ aim. They was trying to get at you.”
“What?”
“Had that gun not jammed on them, you would probably be dead baby girl.”
“Why would somebody wanna kill me? I know Tamar threatens me a lot, but he wouldn’t do that.”
“I don’t know but this the last time I’m getting a room on the first floor.”
I shook my head because this was not the time for jokes. He was lying here bleeding to damn death and had just told me that I was the actual target. It took me a minute to realize that he was right. The fact that they followed me to the side of the bed and backed me into the wall said it all.
“Damn, I really wish I could get you to move back to Dallas. That would so perfect—”A knock at the door stopped Jaheim from finishing his thoughts. “Go, get out of here. I’ll make up some shit to tell them. I’ll text you later and let you know I’m okay.”
I kissed Jaheim all over his face before grabbing my purse and phone and running out the balcony and rushing to my car.
23: Starr
“Come on, Dominique, Mama gotta get to work,” I said pulling Dominique towards her father’s house. She was a little upset because I didn’t use the color and type of barrettes on her hair that she had wanted. She was such a damn girly girl and had to have gotten that from her father’s side of the family because she damn sure didn’t get it from me. Dominique ran up to Neek’s door and rung the doorbell. She handed me her Barbie Doll and purse and I looked at her strangely.
“You don’t wanna take your doll and purse with you now?” I asked her.
“No, I’m gonna tell Daddy I left them so that he can buy me a new doll and purse.”
“Umm little girl—” I started in on her, but before I could get her, Neek opened the door.
“Hey Daddy, you’re gonna have to buy me a new doll and purse because I left the old ones with Mama.”
“That’s how you greet me after not seeing me for almost a week?” Neek asked as he kneeled down to her level.
“I said hey Daddy.”
Neek began to tickle her before he picked her up and tossed her into the air. I tried not to notice how good he was looking. His muscles flexed every time he tossed Dominique in the air and I could tell that he had been working out, something he did often when he was stressing. Somewhere in between us supposedly getting back together to us not because Dro was with the UNC, we ended up splitting up for a month, got back together only to split up again. This time was the longest that we had been off.
“Come in and let me talk to you,” Neek said after he sat Dominique on the ground.
“Not now Neek, I gotta client coming in the next twenty minutes and it’s gonna take me at least thirty to get there.”
“It won’t take, but a minute. Come here.”
I rolled my eyes and walked into the house. I already knew that anytime he asked me to talk it was because he was either getting lonely and wanted to play house for a few weeks. After he was good, he would just accuse me of cheating on him again and then move all his things out when I wasn’t home, just to start all over again. I was tired. The back and forth wasn’t healthy for our daughter and hell it wasn’t healthy for me either.
“What’s up?”
“How you been feeling?”
“I’m fine.”
“You looking thick? What’s up with that?”
I looked over my body, frowned, and then looked back up at Neek and shrugged my shoulders. “I guess I’m just eating good. What do you want, Neek, I gotta go.”
“So what’s up? You still fucking with that nigga?” Neek asked as he brought his hands together while staring at me intently.
“Dominique, got to your room,” I told her. I waited until she was out of earshot and then brought my glare to Neek. “Look nigga, I’m sick of your ass coming at me with this bullshit. If you’re done with me then be done with me, if not then make up your fuckin’ mind. You can’t tell me you forgive me and then the next week accuse me of still doing the same shit you supposed to have forgiven me for.”
“You right and I wanna come home and make this shit right between us, but I need to know what’s going with you and Dro?”
“There is nothing going on between me and him. It’s over.”
“Yea and you told me that shit the last time and turned around and fucked him.”
“We already talked about that, Neek. Man I’m about to go. I don't have time for this.”
“Tell me the truth. Do you want this to work or not?”
“I did, but you can’t seem to make up your damn mind on what you want, so I’m over it now. Just call me later, I gotta go.”
“Call your client and tell her you’ll be late. We need to talk. This shit been brewing for a while and a talk needs to happen.”
I sighed, took my cell phone out, and then shot my girl Jalisa a text letting her know that I would be a couple of hours late and that if she could come through later or just reschedule, I would credit her account so that it would be free to her. I tossed my phone back into my purse and walked over to the couch and sat down. Neek told me to follow him up to his bedroom because he wanted to smoke and didn’t want Dominique to smell anything.
Once we got upstairs, he closed the bedroom door and placed a towel at the bottom to keep the smoke from seeping through the crack. He went over to his dresser and grabbed a blunt that he already had rolled up and fired it up.
“How long were you messing with that nigga, Starr, and don’t lie to me because niggas be talking.”
“I don't have a reason to lie. I wanna get it all out there so we can be done and hopefully don’t have to talk about this shit anymore. We were talking for about 8 months. He moved down here from New York, I met him one night I was out with Brian at the club. We exchanged numbers and it went from there. I just noticed he was getting money and honestly it was never supposed to go as far as it went and definitely not for 8 months.”
“So, why you never told me he was Tamar’s cousin?”
“What the fuck is you talking about?”
“Don’t play stupid.”
“Ain’t nobody playing stupid. I didn’t know that he was Tamar’s cousin. All that nigga told me was that he was a hustler and I knew that as facts because he kept that cheddar on him and I even went with him a few times when he pushed some weight back and forth. I mean, I kinda knew that he would be dealing with Tamar eventually, but I had no idea that it went as far as them being cousins.”
“You know how fucked up that is that I gotta sit in the same room as this nigga at least a couple of times a month knowing that he fucked my wife. Then this nigga sit there looking at me and laughing and shit like he know some shit I don’t know. And then you wonder why the fuck I keep asking if you still fucking him.”
“Well I’m not! I can’t help if he bitter because I left him alone and wanna be childish. I haven’t been with him since the last time and I’m not gonna keep saying that, Neek.”
Neek walked over to me and handed me the blunt. Before I knew it, he had gone into my purse and grabbed my cell phone out of it. I wasn't really worried about it though because he couldn’t get into it unless he knew my passcode or had my fingerprint to unlock it. I hit the blunt and watched as he scrunched his face all up in anger.
“Unlock this muthafucka’.”
“Tuh, you not about to go through my phone. I don’t go through yours and you damn sure not about to—”
Neek came at me and grabbed at my hand. I slapped his hand away and backed up away from him. He reached for me again, but this time, he gripped his hand around my throat and pushed me into the bed. My circulation was slowly cutting off. I had never seen Neek this angry before at least not with me.
“Unlock this muthafuckin’ phone now!” he yelled and I brought my hand up to push his hand away when he caught it, took my thumb and pressed down on the phone. Once it unlocked, he let me go and backed up away from me.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” I screamed as I got up and came towards him.
“Get the fuck back!” he pushed my little ass so hard that I went flying to the floor. Neek rushed out of his bedroom and closed the door behind him. By time I got up off the floor, and out of the room, he was nowhere to be found.
“Dominique go back to your room,” I told her when I noticed her standing at the bottom of the stairs. I went back into Neek’s room to grab my purse and keys so that I could leave when I noticed that I had left them downstairs on the couch. I took a deep breath and exited out of the room when I was grabbed from behind by my hair and dragged back inside. “Let me go! Neek, get your fuckin’ hands off of me! I swear if you put your hands on me again, I’m a kill you bitch!”
WHAM!
“You nasty ass bitch! You still fucking and sucking on this nigga man! Just fucking last night—and you had this nigga in my fuckin’ house! While my muthafucking daughter was there!”
WHAM!
Neek hit me again across the face and my lip swelled instantly. I broke free of his grasp and brought my hand up and punched him in the face. He went to hit me again when I kicked him in the knee and caused him to stagger backwards. He recovered quickly and punched me so hard in the face that I flew backwards and fell onto the carpeted floor. I rolled from side to side holding onto my nose, which felt broken.
“You’ll never see Dominique again, you lying ass bitch. Get the fuck up and get out of my house. Since you wanna be a hoe, I’mma treat you like one you fucking slut. Get the fuck up!” Neek snatched me up from the floor and dragged me out of his room, downstairs, and to the front door. He opened up the door and pushed me outside.
“You bitch! I swear to God I’mma kill you nigga! Gimme my shit!” I screamed.
“Mommy!” Dominique ran to the front door and Neek grabbed her and pulled her back. He tossed my cell phone outside which hit the ground and shattered followed by my keys. He knew what he was doing. He knew I never left home without my Nina and if I had gotten my hands on it, he was a fucking dead man. I grabbed my keys, then my phone, and jumped in my car and peeled off.
***
“It hurts! Shit!” I screamed at Dro as he rubbed Neosporin over the wounds on my face.
“Man, just be still.”
“Why didn’t you tell me that you and Tamar was cousins? Why wouldn’t you tell me something like that?”
Dro stopped what he was doing and looked at me. He then picked up the peroxide, poured some on a cotton ball and then rubbed it over my lip.
“I didn’t think you fuckin’ cared. And by time I realized who your was husband and that he worked for my fam, we had already been fucking for months.”
“You still should’ve told me! You made me look like a fucking fool. Shit, Dro, get away from me!”
“Why the fuck do it matter if Tamar is my cousin? Shit, I ain’t Neek’s cousin. Get the fuck outta here with that. That shit don’t matter and you know it.”
“Then he say you sit around rubbing shit in his face, letting him know that we still be fucking around. Man you promised me that you wouldn’t cause no problems if I gave you another chance. Damn, this shit just ruining my damn family.”
I went to get up to leave when I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. I got up and ran towards the bathroom, tossed the toilet seat up and threw up everything that I had eaten. I could feel Dro standing over me and he pulled my hair back to keep me from getting it wet.
“You pregnant, huh?”
“What-no—aghh.” I started throwing up again. Once I was sure I was done, I got up from the floor and walked over to the sink. I turned the water on and cupped my hand to put some water in my mouth. Swishing the water around, I spit it out in the sink and then grabbed my toothbrush that I had here at Dro’s place. I placed a dab of toothpaste on the bristles and began to brush my teeth.
Dro walked up behind me, and wrapped his arms around my waist. He kissed on my ear while rubbing on my stomach. I rolled my eyes at him through the mirror because I knew that I was pregnant. I had found out a couple of weeks ago, but refused to say anything to either of them because I didn't know whom the father was. I was so embarrassed because this was the second time that it had happened this way since I had been fooling around on my husband. The first time, I immediately took care of the problem by getting an abortion, but this time I couldn’t bring myself to do it agai
n.
“I hope it’s mine,” Dro whispered in my ear. “I knew you were pregnant by how wet that pussy be and how you run from my dick now when I’m deep up in it.”
“What am I gonna do, Dro? I can’t believe that this is my life,” I said as tears poured from my eyes.
“You know I got you. I’ve been telling you that for the longest. Get Dominique, get your shit, and move in with me.”
“No, no,” I shook my head and quickly pushed him away from me. Was he crazy? Get Dominique? Move in with him? Neek wasn’t about to let this shit happen. He was liable to kill us both. I had completely underestimated my husband and thought that he had gone to the army and lost his gangsta, but clearly I was wrong. No way in hell I was about to move my daughter up in here with this fool. He was asking for Neek to beat that ass again. I walked out of the bathroom and grabbed my phone and keys and prepared to leave when Dro grabbed me and started kissing all over me.
“Ughhhh! I can’t do this anymore, Dro, I just can’t!” I screamed pushing him away from me. “Please stop calling me, stop texting me, and don’t come looking for me. Man, I mean it this time! I’m done.”
“Man, that’s my baby you fuckin’ carrying the fuck you mean don’t call or text you?” Dro had the nerve to say like I had lost him.
“Just what the fuck I said, Dro! And this could be just as much as my husband’s baby as it is yours.”
“Baby come here,” Dro called out to me.
“I’m gone and I’m getting my number changed. If I have to Dro, I will get a restraining order on your ass to keep you away from me. Please just leave me alone. I will let you know if I decide to keep this baby or not.”
“What you mean if you decide to keep it? You keeping that damn baby.”
I threw my hand up and walked out of Dro’s house and out to the car. I was seriously done with him this time. I had gotten myself into some deep shit and had to find a way to get out. Damn, I hated that Rozalyn was going through so much right now. I really needed someone to talk to. I was straight fucking up and this wasn’t like me at all. How did I screw up so damn bad like this?
