by Dean, Ali
I pull my phone out of my pocket before I even realize I’m doing it. I’ve gotten into a terrible habit of checking for messages whenever I have a dull moment.
“Still no messages?”
“Nope.”
I haven’t heard from Beckett all week, making me think I’m legit going crazy. Even Griff hasn’t reached out to follow up about the offer, and I’m starting to wonder if I imagined everything. If it wasn’t for the texts from Naomi and Summer, I might just be checking into the student health center.
“It’s so weird. He seemed so into you Saturday night and then spent the entire freaking day with you on Sunday. I saw him kiss you goodbye.”
“I know,” I say on a sigh. I don’t want to go over it again.
The chime on the door rings and our first customer walks in. It’s Davis, the surfer who sat with me in the cafeteria last weekend.
“Hey Jordan. Lucy, right?” He approaches the counter. “I didn’t know you worked here.”
“It’s our first day,” I tell him. “So maybe start by ordering something simple?”
“I usually just get drip coffee. Can you handle that one?”
I glance at Lucy. “We didn’t screw up the pot we started earlier, did we?” It’s not exactly a pot, more like a massive cannister holding twenty gallons or something, so yeah, I hope we didn’t screw it up.
“Nope. I’ve been testing it all morning,” Lucy says, bouncing on her feet to demonstrate just how well that caffeine is working.
I put Davis’s order into the computer, which takes longer than it should, and swipe his card.
“I got it,” Lucy offers, pouring his cup.
“What are you up to tonight?” Davis asks.
“I’m going skateboarding as soon as I get done with this shift.”
Lucy hands Davis his cup. “I’m going out!” she exclaims. “Anything fun going on you know about?”
“Yeah, some friends are throwing a party. Let me get your number and I can text you about it.”
They exchange numbers, and Davis asks if I want his number too in case I change my mind later. “I can just check with Lucy, we’re roommates,” I explain.
He waves goodbye and Lucy turns to me for a high five. “Yes! He’s friends with that surfer crew who showed up at Stargaze last Saturday night!”
“Oh yeah, they seemed cool.” Actually, I don’t remember anything about the rest of them, probably wouldn’t even recognize those guys if I saw them on campus. But my friends were hanging out with them and excited about it, and Davis is cool, so I figure this is a good thing she got his number.
“Cool? Cool? Coby Dalton is so much more than cool.” Lucy sighs dreamily.
“Who’s Coby Dalton?”
She slaps my arm. “I sometimes forget you aren’t from around here. But Coby’s kind of a big deal in the surfing world. You’ve never heard of him?”
I shake my head. “I don’t really follow surfing.”
“I couldn’t believe he talked to me when we were roller skating. I mean, I wasn’t even really roller skating exactly, but Coby was so sweet and kind of held my elbow when I couldn’t keep my balance.”
Lucy gazes off, reliving her moment with her crush. “You sure you don’t want to come tonight? I got the feeling Davis might be into you. Could be a good distraction from Beck?”
I know she’s only trying to help but the last thing I need is another guy complicating things. Who knew there’d be so many options at college? I mean, it’s not that many, but for me it’s overwhelming. I can barely handle Beck, I don’t need any more distractions.
“Nah, I think I just need to skateboard for a few hours and I’ll feel better.”
By the time the shift ends at 3 PM, I’m dying to get out of here. Standing around making coffee during precious skateboarding time is brutal. It’s a gorgeous day outside, and as soon as we hang up our aprons, I’m waving goodbye to Lucy and riding to the bus stop.
Naomi and Summer have been texting all week about connecting this weekend, and I’m meeting them at another new-to-me park called The Ledge.
They texted me earlier in the week asking if Griff was messing with them when he said I was Beck’s girlfriend. I’d just responded with a vague, “If I am, it’s news to me too.” I’m guessing they’ll ask me more about it today, and I’ve got no clue what to tell them. The truth, or most of it, I guess.
Sure enough, as soon as we find each other at the park, they’re on me about Beck.
“Why would Griff say that?” Summer fires off.
Naomi asks, “Is something going on with you and my brother?”
“I don’t think so,” I tell them, doing a quick sweep of the park. It’s the farthest one from campus that I’ve had my eye on, but it’s huge. The features aren’t as big as Riptide but there’s more terrain. The place is filled with people of all ages.
“Okay, you’re not getting away with that answer,” Summer says, forcing my attention back to her. “We’ll let you skate in a second, but first tell us why Griff would say that.”
“I don’t know, maybe he was trying to get you off his back about hooking up with me?” I suggest, uncertain how to handle these two when it comes to their brothers.
“Wait, you hooked up with Griffin?” Naomi asks.
“No, but you guys lectured him about it, didn’t you, so maybe he was just making it clear that’s not an issue or something.” This should be the most awkward conversation ever, but somehow, it’s not that bad. Maybe because I’m just as lost about the situation, or because I really am only half paying attention. I’ve been cooped up all day and now an incredible park is dangling in front of me.
“So, you haven’t hooked up with Beck either?” Summer pushes.
“Um…” Crap. “Not really. I don’t know.” What does hook up mean, anyway? They’re staring, wide-eyed and waiting for me to elaborate. Sighing, I tell them, “We ran into your brothers on Saturday night and hung out with them and some of their friends. Then the next day, you know Beck gave me a ride back to campus from the park. We studied together and ate and that’s it. I haven’t heard from him since, so I don’t know what this is. Nothing, I guess.” I shrug, like I haven’t been obsessing about it all week.
“Huh,” Summer mutters.
“It’s my brother so I don’t know if I really want to know more details… but in order to figure this out I kind of need to.”
I cut her off. “You don’t need to figure anything out, Naomi. There’s nothing to figure out.”
Summer and Naomi exchange a look. “You know what? Never mind. I think we’re good.” Naomi is all smiles as she drops her board. “You coming?”
I shake my head. “Okay, whatever.” Summer and I skate into the park behind Naomi, who calls over her shoulder, “Oh, and he’s out of town this weekend, I’m sure that’s why you haven’t heard from him.”
Great, now I’m thinking about Beck again. Really thinking about him. Out of town where? I thought he said he had a heavy course load and was going to be full time on campus this semester. And that doesn’t really explain the rest of the week. Sure, he’s never actually used my phone number before, but he has it.
I’m only able to switch gears when I see there’s not only tons of ramps and verts and bowls, but a pump track too. It’s a paved path of rollers and banks in a circuit. I’ve seen these on videos before but never rode one myself. Usually they are gravel or dirt for mountain or BMX bikes, and only recently have they hit the skateboarding scene. I zoom forward, barely able to contain my excitement. I’m in heaven.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Beck
I get back from L.A. on Sunday with enough time to swing by my mom’s house before heading back to campus.
“Oh good! Does this mean you’re joining us for dinner?” she asks as I lean down to kiss her on the cheek. Mom’s wearing an apron and beaming. She loves being in the kitchen, feeding us and taking care of her family. A lot of my earliest memories are of just me and her
in the kitchen together. Dad was always away on business trips and they divorced when I was seven years old. Mom met my stepdad a year later, and a year after that they got married. When I was ten, they had Naomi. I’ve always felt grateful Mom could be appreciated by someone other than just me for her caretaking role. Being home helping family is where she thrives, and I’m glad she got a second chance to have the family she was hoping for.
“Yeah Mom, I’ll stay for dinner.”
“You look stressed. L.A. always stresses you out. Is it the traffic?”
“The traffic, sure, I don’t know. I haven’t really been on my skateboard in a week.”
“Oh dear. Maybe we don’t want you to stay for dinner then,” she teases.
“No! He has to stay.” Naomi slides into the kitchen on socked feet. “He’s going to tell us all about his new girlfriend.”
“New girlfriend!” Mom hands me a basket of rolls to bring to the table. Naomi took over setting the table when I moved out and she’s already going through those movements. I help her out with the water glasses even as I shoot her a glare.
“There’s no girlfriend, Mom. Naomi, how about you? Any boyfriends we should know about?”
“Nope. Jordan did some sick frontside inverts yesterday. Got it on video. But she still hasn’t started an Instagram account.”
“That’s because she doesn’t want one,” I tell her, ignoring the way my heart kickstarts visualizing Jordan doing frontside inverts. Those are dangerous moves, and I’m not sure she should be doing them with a recent concussion. I’m in no position to get on her case about it, and anyway, a little part of me loves that her passion for riding makes her lose common sense. I haven’t even spoken to her or seen her in a week, yet my mind keeps referring to her as ‘my girl’ in my head. I can’t stop thinking of her that way.
I didn’t go to the shoot in L.A. because Vienna wanted me to or because it would make me look bad if I didn’t show. I went to remind myself that I’m only in the college bubble for a couple months, and when that’s over, an entirely differently world is waiting to swallow me up. Nothing good could come of getting involved with Jordan Slattery, no matter how much I want to spend just one more day with her. One more minute in that storage closet.
“You know,” my sister is still talking, “Jordan’s probably not jumping at Griffin’s offer because she doesn’t want to end up like you.”
That snaps me out of it. My tone is harsher than I intend when I respond. “Like me?” I know exactly what she’s saying though.
“Doing shit you don’t really want to do because you became a famous skateboarder.”
“Language, Naomi!” Mom scolds.
“Naomi, I hate to break it to you, kid, but sometimes even adults have to do shit they don’t want to do. It’s part of having a job. Part of life.”
Naomi glances at our mom. “You aren’t going to scold him for language?”
Mom taps a finger on her chin. “I should, but I’m too busy contemplating what he just said.”
I pat Mom’s shoulder as I pass her to fill another water glass. “It was deep, I know. I’ve got a lot of wisdom in my twenty-five years.”
She gives me a “Hmmmm…,” her signature response when she doesn’t agree but doesn’t feel like elaborating.
Naomi goes back to grumbling about the reality TV show. You’d think most teenage girls would be pumped about an older brother going on reality TV, but not this one.
My stepdad walks in before I can start trying to justify how I got roped into Shred Live.
“Beck.” He opens his arms for a hug, and we pat each other’s backs before he asks if I want a beer.
“Yeah, sure.” I could use one right now.
“So what’s this talk about Shred Live? I thought you weren’t starting until next year.”
“I got guilt-tripped into going into L.A. for a promo shoot this weekend.”
“Guilt-tripped, huh?” Marco hands me a bottle of beer and I take a pull before answering him.
“I’m doing it for Griffin.”
“You say this,” Mom says, suddenly standing right beside me. “But aren’t there other ways to help him launch the company? After all, you’ll have your degree soon in business. He could use someone he trusts at his side.”
I hadn’t expected to be hounded when I showed up tonight, but as we settle into our seats at the dinner table and pass around dishes, I know it’s unavoidable. Apparently, Mom’s been worried about this reality TV show for months, ever since learning I signed the contract. I try to tell her that the most powerful thing I can do for Brazen is represent it on international television. It doesn’t take a business degree or experience to figure that much out. But Mom worries about the invasion of privacy, the long-term implications.
“Have you thought about what happens when you become a reality TV star? We’ll have paparazzi in our front yard!”
Placing my hand on my mom’s, I try not to sound patronizing. “Mom, this isn’t Real Housewives or Keeping Up with the Kardashians. Skateboarding might be mainstream in California, but it’s not going to launch me to Brad Pitt status.” I don’t tell her about the hype already building at the studio, the talk I heard about the anticipation brewing for this show. We haven’t even started filming yet and there’s already buzz. I should be just as hyped up for what that means to Griffin’s dream, but I’m not so sure I’ve fully grasped what this could mean for my own life. I didn’t really think much about it until just now.
“Well, you’re a good friend to Griffin,” Marco says. “I know some seek out that spotlight, but for you it’s making a sacrifice to step into it like this.”
Marco gets me in a way my own dad never has.
It’s quiet for a moment as we fill our plates and dig in, but I knew Naomi wouldn’t stay silent for much longer.
“So why haven’t you called Jordan all week? I know you like her.”
“Did she tell you that? And how would you know I like her?”
“We rode with her yesterday and asked her what was going on. She said you hung out Sunday but she hasn’t heard from you since.”
She doesn’t answer my other question, which is fine, because I don’t know if I want the answer. Naomi’s honesty can be brutal sometimes.
“She has my number too,” I point out before realizing just how pathetic that sounds. Naomi smirks at me before taking a bite of mashed potatoes.
“You’re waiting for her to call you?” Mom asks, not hiding her confusion.
“No,” I say on a sigh, though I’m not sure if that’s true. Maybe I’ve been secretly hoping she’ll force me to make a bad decision by showing up at my apartment. Naked. Yeah, I might have had a fantasy or two about that. Not something I should be thinking about at Mom’s dinner table. “Griff offered for her to rep Brazen. She needs some time to think about it. He really wants her, and I wanted to give her some space to decide.” That’s complete bullshit, mostly, and no one lets me get away with it.
Naomi scoffs. Mom “Hmmmm”s. And Marco says, “I know I was just praising your loyalty, but I’m not buying it.”
Marco doesn’t even know what we’re talking about really, so I must be more transparent than I thought.
“I’d like to meet this Jordan,” Mom declares, but she’s not looking at me. She’s looking at Naomi, who grins.
“Great. I’ll invite her over.”
There’s a pounding in my chest as I shake my head and stuff a roll in my mouth. Jordan Slattery is going to be in my life whether I want that or not. Hell, I want it, but I shouldn’t. But with everyone in my life apparently fixated on her, I don’t know how I’ll avoid pulling her closer. Every fiber in my being wants to make her mine, but some voice inside me screams to keep my guard up. I’m just not sure what the danger is anymore. I thought I avoided her all week for her own good, but now I’m wondering if it’s my own heart I’m protecting.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Jordan
“I’ll do it.”<
br />
I close my eyes and tap the arrow to send the text to Griffin.
The tightness in my chest is still there, but a thrill of energy pumps through me. I hop up from my bed. It’s Sunday night, and Lucy is sitting on her bed doing homework.
“What’s up?” she asks.
“I did it. I texted Griffin.”
She frowns and asks slowly, “You mean Beckett?”
The sound of his name alone makes my chest squeeze tighter but I ignore it, like I’ve been doing all week. “No, I told Griffin I’d be the rep for Brazen.”
Lucy sits up and her confusion clears. “Oh, nice! I’m proud of you, Jordan. I think as long as you hold on to the reasons you skateboard, you won’t regret it. I bet you’ll love competition and you know I’ll help with the social media stuff.” I told all the girls at dinner last Sunday about Griffin’s offer and why I didn’t jump on it.
“Thanks. I mean, I’ve always been curious what it would be like to do a contest, but I honestly don’t think I have much of a competitive streak.”
Lucy shoots me a doubtful look. “Anyone who spends hours upon hours practicing the same trick has a competitive streak. Maybe it’s only within yourself, against your own standards, but you have a drive to win.”
“Win against myself? I’m not sure that’s called competitive.”
She shrugs. “Whatever. All I’m saying is you will love competitions. I just know it.”
My phone rings and I’m expecting to see Griffin’s name on the screen, but it’s Beck’s. My heart jumps to my throat. Biting my lip, I hesitate before swiping to answer. I don’t want to admit to the possibility that I might have agreed to Griffin’s offer for a different reason. Sure, earning money to do what I love started to make more sense as the week went on. Maybe I’m being silly thinking it will somehow taint skateboarding for me. Phoebe and Wyatt didn’t totally discredit my concern when I mentioned this to them, but they thought I should at least give it a chance.
Besides, if I’m being really honest with myself, I’ve always wondered if I’d enjoy competing. But a tiny voice whispers that it’s my desire to get closer to Beckett that drove me to get past the baggage that will come with being a brand rep. Especially with the radio silence I’ve had from him all week.
