The Life After War Collection

by Angela White

  “Yes, you are. It’s ending and you loathe the idea of just being an Eagle or even Marc’s mate. You want more. He’s right. That’s why you’re upset.”

  “I want to do more.”

  “And you can’t with Marc here?”

  “Marc wouldn’t stop me.”

  “Unless you choose to stay in command, to share leadership. He’d never accept that, right?”

  Angela tossed the smoldering butt to the ground and put it out with her boot. She viewed Kyle, sometimes still amazed by how much had changed since her first day in this refugee camp. Why didn’t the mobster know what was coming, what she’d figured out a long time ago?

  Instead of anger or information, she put him to work. “Talk to people quietly and get a consensus, find out how they feel about us. I don’t want to lead, don’t want this burden, but I don’t think I can go back to being on the shelf until needed. I doubt you can, either. We’ve come too far for that.”

  Kyle left and Angela finished facing the ugly truth. I want to agree. I want to stand at Adrian’s side and keep learning to lead. There’s only one thing on this planet that I want more than that, and it isn’t my Brady.

  Angela’s hand dropped to her stomach.

  2

  Kenn stayed in the darkest part of the shadows as Adrian left, lingering to observe Angela and Kyle instead. What he saw made him grimace. It didn’t take long for him to understand what Adrian was doing and why.

  “Always protecting the herd,” Kenn muttered, following Adrian. “When do you get to be happy?”

  Kenn had accepted that Adrian didn’t want to take back over, and stopped openly pushing him on it. He thought he understood why now. Adrian was training her and giving himself a break. So far, it was working out well. Kenn didn’t think things would be much different if Adrian hadn’t been injured, except that he himself might have Marc’s job of slowing down the enemy.

  “And what have you seen that makes you lower yourself to these tactics?” Kenn mused, watching Adrian accept an offer of comfort from Nancy, the sailor from Hot Springs. “What’s coming for you, but not this camp?”

  “His past.”

  Kenn turned to find Samantha had been shadowing him. He scowled.

  “Hey, not like that,” she explained quickly. “I’m practicing and you’re better than most of the Eagles.”

  Kenn’s chest swelled, but he ducked mentally. Samantha was rarely nice to anyone. “What do you mean, his past?”

  Sam pointed out something that she assumed he’d missed. Most people here had. “Did you notice that all of us have been brought down, in one way or another? We’ve been knocked about as low as we can go, then Adrian built us back up. Now, we’re stronger than we’ve ever been.”

  Kenn hadn’t realized how many of Safe Haven’s members had gone through it until she said so. “Adrian? His fall came in little Rock, right?”

  “No,” Samantha snorted. “It started when Angie came here. Little Rock was a domino in that line. His payment, his punishment, hasn’t come yet.”

  Kenn got her point, worrying more than he already had been.

  Samantha, full of energy that needed a release, sent her hot gaze down Kenn’s big body. “Yours is probably over...”

  Kenn flushed, understanding what her problem was. Neil and Jeremy had been gone on a supply run for days, and they were busy when here, teaching and preparing. “They’ll be home soon.”

  “I wasn’t hitting on you,” Sam stated quickly. “I’m mixing energy and the easiest way to draw it from a man is to turn them on.”

  Kenn’s face went scarlet this time. His mouth opened. “Did you get anything?”

  Samantha shook her head, though she was tasting him. “May I?”

  Kenn gave a tense nod and had to clench his fists to stay still while she drew.

  Samantha let go all at once, unable to stand any more of that strong flavor.

  Kenn took deep breaths to keep from saying anything stupid. All the men were helping the descendants stay refilled so that they could heal the wounded who were coming in every few days, but this was the first time one of them had come to him for it. His own gifts were minor in comparison and didn’t need refilling.

  Samantha gave Kenn a leer, one friendlier than he’d ever gotten from her.

  “You’re not all dark and confused anymore. It makes your energy stronger. Try doing something with your gifts, instead of waiting for them to come to you.”

  Samantha turned away while he was shocked into speculative silence. She probably shouldn’t have told him that, but he was another weapon they could use for the fight.

  “Hey.”

  Samantha turned around, not sure what to expect. “Yes?”

  “What’s the easiest way to take it from a woman?”

  Sam knew what he meant, and flashed a healthy leer. “Piss us off, of course. We live on anger and love. Those are often the only two things that exist for a female.”

  Kenn suddenly didn’t envy Neil and Jeremy any of the three-way fantasies he’d had. If they were able to please this woman for long, he was Superman.

  Kenn quickly caught up with her, waiting to see if she glared or accepted him along for wherever she was going.

  “I was hoping you’d ask,” Samantha admitted. “I need Level Five in Kai. Neither of my men will punch.”

  Kenn tensed, but didn’t deny the request. She’d come to him because she knew he was capable of that and more. “The training tent is empty right now. It’s packed up for tomorrow.”

  Samantha changed directions and flashed a pointed glare to Jeff, her protection. “I asked for this. Make sure Angela knows.”

  Jeff wasn’t exactly okay with it (he’d also refused), but he didn’t interfere. Adrian and Angela insisted that none of their females would ask for more than they could handle and Jeff had to believe that. After the nights he’d been spending with Crista, the thought of losing her was paralyzing.

  They went into the tent to find Kyle and Jennifer doing much what they’d come to do. Both pairs stared at each other in uneasy concern.

  Samantha started to go out, but Kenn put a hand on her arm, which he withdrew as she stopped.

  “This is better,” he explained. “She’ll be able to tell Angela that I’m not hurting you any more than I have to. It will keep the men from hunting me. Your Eagles, you’ll still have to handle.”

  Samantha went toward the curious pair. Neil and Jeremy wouldn’t like this, but a large part of Angela’s plan for the women depended on her and she wouldn’t be able to do it if she couldn’t take a real hit. The soldiers who were coming would follow orders and they wouldn’t go easy because she was female. To do her duty, she had to know what to expect when the battle came to Safe Haven’s gates.

  Kenn stripped his shirt and boots, using Neil’s level five training instructions for the females, and watched Samantha’s expression flood with restless need. Neil had noted, like the males, women were easy to take down when they were distracted by a sexual spark.

  “Control that shit and pay attention!” Kenn snapped, moving toward her.

  Samantha’s anger flared to life and she met him in the middle of the tent, set to work off the ugly feeling of bad days being just over the horizon for all of them.

  3

  “I’ve noticed that you show a lot of attention to some women here–more than you do other females, even those you sleep with.”

  Adrian didn’t pause from shoveling out the livestock trailer, but inside, he cringed. He hadn’t expected this conversation yet. Time to be careful or tell the truth?

  “Some people deserve more attention.”

  “Like my mom?”

  Adrian understood the boy had planned it all. He’d been ambushed. “Yes.”

  Adrian heard Charlie’s silent frustration when he gave nothing more. The impatience of youth. I barely remember my own.

  “Why can’t you leave her alone?”

  Adrian stopped, wiping his brow with a sw
eaty sleeve before pinning the teenager with a cool look. “You don’t know?”

  Charlie flushed under the light scold, but held his ground. “I know the truth, no matter what the camp is told.”

  Adrian scowled at him. “The truth is only an illusion in any group of people, son. You’ll figure that out. In the meantime, swallow the snot that can’t wait to fly out of your mouth and ask what you want to know.”

  It was the roughest he’d ever been with Charlie. Most grown men would have withered beneath his tones.

  The sullen boy only turned a darker shade of red, face saying he didn’t want to keep going, but he was.

  “Why did you train her to take your place?” The child’s tone lowered, became pain-filled. “Is it really what was best for the camp…or is it personal?”

  It was demanded with so much genuine pain that Adrian didn’t hesitate. “Why does it have to be one or the other? Why not both?”

  There was a stunned silence where even the Eagles on duty around them forgot to breathe.

  The noises of the camp rolled on the wind as the two males stared at each other, one in shock and the other in complete control.

  Adrian waited until the boy was about to speak, expression saying it was ugly, and cut him off. “As her blood, it’s natural to question my personal interest in her, but as for your version of the truth, it doesn’t exist. She’s not betraying your dad.”

  Adrian stripped his gloves to fish for a smoke. “Though I wouldn’t fault her if she did and neither would most of the Eagles.”

  Charlie waited silently, stunned to have been given honesty.

  “We have rough roads ahead and not enough warriors,” Adrian stated, never doubting what came next or what his response should be. “You still see the timid mouse that my right hand man beat on. She no longer exists. Your mother is now a leader of men.”

  “And the personal?” Charlie forced out.

  Adrian tossed his butt into one of the empty cans and met the teenager’s wary gaze. “She’ll need someone to care for her if your dad doesn’t make it back.”

  Adrian’s blue eyes lit up with a deep hunger that the hormone-filled teenager recognized instantly.

  “And I want that job like I’ve never wanted another. I’ve searched for her my whole life and I have the ability to make her happier than any of the men who’ve had her light.”

  Adrian went back to shoveling; aware that he’d sped his plans up, but wasn’t overly concerned. It was about time everyone knew he wanted her. More changes were coming.

  “If your dad does return, I’ll step aside, like I’ve been doing since she got here.”

  Charlie took it all in as evenly as he could. He hadn’t considered what would happen if Marc died. His mom would fall apart.

  “Does…does she want you?”

  Adrian snorted in bitter amusement. “That, is another matter entirely. I am the wrong one to ask.”

  “She won’t give me an answer.”

  Adrian sighed miserably. “Because it’s hard for her to accept. Yes, she might eventually take my comfort, but she’d never forgive me or herself. If your dad dies, I’ll be there for her, but she’ll pretend I’m him.”

  Charlie opened his mouth to blast out the awful heaviness that thought brought. And went back to shoveling instead. If he’d lost Tracy to the water snake, he might have done the same thing. He already couldn’t imagine being without her.

  “How do you hold on when that’s all you have to look forward to?”

  Adrian couldn’t refuse to answer now and he found himself giving all of the truth, something he rarely did. “I love her. She’ll need me to put her back together. My life means nothing compared to hers.”

  That type of selflessness was something Charlie respected, but didn’t understand except in the smallest terms. He hadn’t been through Adrian’s decades of pain and hell. Hopefully, he never would.

  Adrian waited for the next rounds of questions.

  “Tracy isn’t going to service the Eagles anymore.”

  Adrian smirked at the quick topic change and the new warning. “Have you cleared that with her?”

  Charlie flushed.

  Adrian pushed, “Her choice, right?”

  “Our choice.”

  “You’d better clear that one with your mom, then. It’s still a couple months shy of your birthday.”

  Charlie waved a frustrated hand at the preparations going on around the camp. “We may not have months!”

  Adrian found it harder to pretend than he usually did. “Still, rules are important, even when it seems grim.” He glanced up. “If you do it, she has to let the others here who’ve been waiting to be legal couples. You’ll throw off all the balance we’ve made. You’re her son. If she makes an exception for just you, she loses respect. Be sure your choices won’t hurt the camp.”

  Charlie took the advice to heart and then continued on to his next issue. He’d asked to be put with Adrian.

  Kyle hadn’t argued. He’d known what was coming. The Eagles didn’t have a right to that series of conversations. As her son, Charlie did and they were eager to know the results.

  “Conner’s hiding something.”

  “Yeah,” Adrian grunted. “But what?”

  Charlie was glad Adrian had also noticed. “He blocks too well. You’ll have to have my mom do it.”

  “Why not tell her yourself?”

  Charlie shrugged. “I don’t want her to think I’m jealous or anything. I like Conner and it worries me. He’s not happy here.”

  “No, he’s not,” Adrian agreed. He didn’t tell Charlie that Conner wanted the same as what he had when his mom had first come–to be alone with his parents and for everyone else to go away. Conner also didn’t like it that his father wasn’t in charge of the herd. It wasn’t how he remembered things.

  “I got all that, but there’s something else,” Charlie pointed out lowly. “He has a dark spot.”

  Adrian knew. “I’ll handle it.”

  “Good.”

  Adrian looked over. “What else?”

  Charlie laughed, feeling better now. “I know what Becky’s gift is.”

  “What?”

  “She’s a tracker. She has a mental grid like my dad. She can tell us where the enemy is, if he’s close.”

  New plans began spinning, new threads twining around the complex ball that already existed. Adrian leaned the shovel against the truck. “Guess I’ll be talkin’ to your mom now, after all.”

  Charlie watched him go, noting the proud look around the camp, and realized Adrian’s good mood swing had come from knowing that he would spend a few minutes around Angela.

  “I won’t go through this with you, Tracy. Please don’t try to put me through the same shit,” Charlie muttered in annoyed resignation. “I’ll walk.”

  4

  Angela had listened to Samantha’s weather report without any change in expression, but in her heart, she’d placed the warning with the sense of doom that had been haunting her. That was why Adrian had them planning to leave the country, instead of going to ground here. He knew Yellowstone was going to blow, had probably seen it in his dreams. It was yet another foresight on his part that might save them all.

  As it was, the steady temperature drop was already making both of Safe Haven’s leaders nervous. How soon would winter be on them at this rate? With the trips and extra stops Angela had planned, water and fuel wouldn’t be a problem. They were almost full. The camp had voted for Lookout Mountain and she would take them, but not before gathering what they would need to live on and fight with. Adrian had taught her well.

  Angela forced her thoughts from that man’s actions, instead considering how happy it had to make him that they now had so many children. There were more than any of them had found in one place since the war, and it was impossible not to like them. Thanks to the den mothers and Eagles, these children filled areas of camp with laughter that was sorely needed to remind these people of what they were about t
o be fighting for. More than thirty kids now called Safe Haven home, leading to longer, more luxurious RVs to hold them all. There were now five of these shiny, old world reminders and double the security. Not that it mattered. Daryl’s team was always near them now, though not only to protect the kids from outsiders. The new age limit had given these men insights that the other males here didn’t have, plus, Daryl still had them observing one of their own for a possible violation. After handing out punishments to Seth and Kyle, Daryl’s team had become the camp enforcers. One of them–Billy–had found a girl he liked too much while they’d been doing duty over the kids in camp. His team had noticed.

  Angela didn’t think there was anything to worry about, unlike when they’d been watching Crone. In fact, she thought it was proof of what Adrian had told her after the last camp meeting. The Eagles would become protectors of their females and age wouldn’t make a difference. Their little girls would have happy childhoods and then be eased into breeding by caring, strong men who could love and protect them. Billy was likely to be the first one to fall that way. Others would follow, but all of them would be monitored. It had to be handled carefully, case-by-case, but it had to happen. They needed babies more than even bullets. Jennifer’s birth had resulted in a child, one of two, but another woman had lost hers since then. They were down to four coming births, with no new pregnancies that they were aware of. It was forcing the camp to accept that every little girl born now would help them continue to exist later.

  Angela looked to where Jennifer was enjoying a few minutes of peace. The other college kids from her first pickup were helping with weapons and classes where they could, as were many of the people who’d had the time to settle in. Even the Nuns were assisting, learning how to load weapons. They’d refused to take the defense or gun classes, though. Cesar’s former slaves, on the other hand, were excelling in those two areas. They were also causing trouble.

  Lilly and Grace hadn’t forgiven Jennifer anything. Having them in a tent together made for a tense class. There was more to come between those three, Angela was sure. To counter the danger, she’d placed Beth, the pregnant nun, under Jennifer’s care. That meant all of the pregnant females came around, because Beth had made friends. It wasn’t uncommon for the breeders in camp to do everything together, even eat. It gave Jennifer friends and protection when the Eagles couldn’t stay close to her, and allowed the mothers-to-be to get a view of what they were in for as she learned to care for little Autumn.