Pettikin

by Abby Smith

  I gasped.

  “What is it?” Pettikin asked.

  “The maze-that creepy maze we had to go through last time-where is it?” I scanned the horizon for the imposing landmark which should have been visible by now.

  “You’re right. It’s not here,” Pettikin said.

  I went and got Professor Theopolous’ map from Taos’ pack. Pettikin and I unfolded it, smoothing it down over the rough surface of our rock, turning it around a few times, trying to orient it correctly. Like before, neither of us could make much sense of it.

  “There’s this group of concentric circles here which could be the mountains…” I said.

  “Then this thick line in front of them could be the barrier we saw before, but it’s definitely not here now,” Pettikin replied.

  Taos hummed.

  “What does he say, Pettikin?”

  “He said that the maze is one of the protective measures put there by the Guardians to keep anyone who enters this dimension from reaching the Gateway to the higher worlds. Since you have the key to this dimension now, the maze no longer appears for you. It’s like the dimension trusts you.”

  From behind us, one of the knarren made a sound between a cat’s meow and a lion’s growl, causing Pettikin to stiffen momentarily, and then relax.

  “That’s the first time I could understand them. They agree with what I just said.”

  “So the dimension really does appear different for different people.” I rubbed my hands up and down my arms, trying to dispel the prickly energy that was building up again. I dumped a few cookies from the bag onto Professor Theopolous‘ map. Might as well use it as a placemat.

  Taos hummed again.

  “He says that anyone who comes through this dimension without you will encounter that maze and become lost, never reaching the Gateway. Even if they should make it through the maze somehow, the knarren and warriors will be waiting for them, ensuring they will never get through.”

  I remembered the terrifying, arctic gaze of the warriors and shivered.

  “Will we get through this time, Pettikin?”

  Pettikin didn’t reply.

  I watched the night sky and let my mind go blank. From the corner of my eye, I thought I saw a figure, a warrior? I turned, but the figure slipped away behind a large boulder. Had it disappeared because I hadn’t used my ‘other sight’? I felt uneasy. The warriors had always seemed ethereal. This seemed like something had physically been there and slithered away, like a snake.

  No one else was unsettled. Pettikin was quiet, and the alpacas stood with their eyes closed, chewing their cud and humming softly. The knarren were grooming themselves or sitting very still, like Egyptian statues.

  I don’t know how long we stayed like that before the alpacas stirred. I stretched and nudged Pettikin.

  “Should we go?”

  He crawled up to my shoulder. I hopped down, wadded up our placemat, and shoved it into Taos’ pack. Taos led us away, at a somewhat slower pace, the knarren still following behind.

  The path we followed eventually wound around the base of a large hill into the clearing in front of the red, diamond-shaped Gateway at the base of the mountain. Two warriors still stood on either side of it, solemn, dark, imposing. They didn’t acknowledge us, but echoes of an icy, howling wind in my mind made my stomach drop. One by one the alpacas stepped through the Gateway, but my legs started to tremble. I half considered going the long route just to avoid the warriors. With the knarren behind us, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. Of course, at the moment the knarren were busy grooming themselves and purring, so maybe my plan to turn them from terrifying killers into chubby house cats was backfiring.

  “What should we do, Pettikin?”

  Pettikin tightened his hold on my braids.

  I took a shaky step forward, heart pounding. The warriors didn’t move. I clenched my fists and walked forward until I was standing directly in front of the Gateway. The warriors towered over me, stone features and crescent moon headbands glowing in the eerie light of this world. I was suddenly petrified.

  One of the warriors stirred and I cringed, preparing for the worst. He lifted his sword, still in its sheath, and then—smack—whacked me from behind, pushing me, stumbling, through the Gateway.

  An unsettling feeling of dematerializing and being sucked straight up, then spit out and turning solid once more. Three bored alpacas, eyes half-closed, chewed their cud in front of the white diamond Gateway.

  “You did it Allie!” Pettikin said.

  Taos hummed, not nearly impressed enough with me, I thought.

  “So was that it?” I asked. “They’re going to let me through from now on?”

  Taos hummed again.

  “He says they will. They recognize you as the Gatekeeper now.”

  This journey was a million times easier than the one yesterday. Maybe this whole gatekeeping thing wouldn’t be so impossible after all.

  Taos hummed and pressed his nose to my face, an alpaca kiss, then stepped off to the side. Suzy and Sunshine stepped through the next Gateway, Pettikin and I following behind.

  Blue sky everywhere, shining with the warm light of a thousand invisible suns. Why had I ever left this place? I stretched and tried to let blue sky ooze into the nuclei of all of my cells. I closed my eyes and thought about taking a sixteen-hour nap.

  No, wait. I opened my eyes again. I wasn’t supposed to do this, right? There was something else I was supposed to do.

  A foot-long gnome drifted past me, spinning slowly.

  “Hi Allie!”

  “Hi Pettikin! Wow, what are you doing here?”

  Wait a minute—that was ridiculous. We had come here together, how in the world had I forgotten that?

  “I think I just got here, but I think we should stay here forever!”

  “No, no wait Pettikin, I remember. We can’t just stay here in this blue sky—we’ve got to go down to the bouncy-cloud, music world.” I should have asked someone if these dimensions had real names. Professor Theopolous would probably be offended. I wonder if he had written the names somewhere on the maps that we kept not using.

  An annoyed, light brown alpaca head poked through the sky. Sunshine honked at me, her ears pinned back, a sour expression on her face.

  “OK, OK, we’re coming this time, I promise.”

  I pressed my hands and feet down, willing the sky to coalesce around me in a soft, spongy surface.

  “Pettikin do you remember how…”

  “Wheeeee!” Pettikin shot past me, careening through the sky in what I assumed was a downward trajectory.

  I took off after him, knees slightly bent, slaloming through the sky until it became translucent and we could see the first hints of the world below. I felt the sky molecules becoming less dense around me until they dissolved, dropping us through the boundary between the worlds. We fell onto a cloud, bounced up and over onto rainbows, and finally down to the springy light blue ground. Suzy and Sunshine were waiting for us.

  Music swelled around us. Pastel trees waved and rustled their leaves, vibrant stringed gourds hummed, and flowers like irises whistled like pan flutes. Blue and green turtles bouncing balls of light on their shells kept time, and four roly-poly, pastel colored elephants, not much taller than Pettikin marched past us trumpeting the melody through their trunks. Truly, if I had to pick a world to stay in forever, this would be it, I thought.

  Suzy hummed, and I felt a sinking feeling, like my spirit had been zooming around overhead and was now descending to the ground.

  “She’s telling me that’s part of the trap, isn’t she?” I asked.

  Pettikin had been bouncing up and down in time to the music, but stopped when Suzy hummed.

  “Yes. The trap of this world is that it makes anyone who enters it so happy that they forget who they are and want to stay here forever instead. Unless they come with a Gatekeeper whose heart is strong enough to stay true in the face of the fleeting happiness, they will never find the Gateway in
to the higher realms. And even if they did, they couldn’t get through the barrier around it.”

  “So, we can’t ever stay here forever then,” I said a little wistfully.

  Suzy hummed a little more gently this time.

  “She said as long as you are always true to your heart, then you will be OK.”

  I wasn’t entirely sure what she meant by that, or how it answered my question, but also wasn’t sure what to ask to clarify further.

  “So should we just go directly to the Gateway?”

  Sunshine hummed and lead us into the forest, bouncing in time to the music. More tiny elephants joined us, whistling and trumpeting as they marched along with us.

  A small dissonance crept into the harmony and then quickly resolved. It was the first time I had heard something like that on this world. I didn’t think much of it until I heard it again, and this time I turned around. I thought I saw a shadow slip behind a tree, and as it disappeared, the dissonance resolved again into the harmony of the world.

  I felt uneasy and wondered if I should say something to Suzy or Sunshine, but neither of them seemed to have noticed, and the music soon washed away any anxiety I was feeling. I probably just imagined it.

  The music began to fade, and we arrived at the lake. Sunshine walked a few steps onto the sparkling sand, then stopped and hummed.

  “She said this is the last time she will help you through this dimension,” Pettikin said.

  I sighed and draped an arm over her neck. “Yes, yes, I get it. I’m on my own after this.”

  Suzy was already dragging a leaf from the nearby grove of pink and yellow trees, so I kissed Sunshine’s cheek and went to find one for Pettikin and myself. Pettikin climbed aboard and installed himself up in the narrow bow like before. I pushed us off from the shore and seated myself cross-legged in the stern, Suzy already floating ahead of us toward the shimmering diamond in the distance. Some of the elephants had joined Sunshine on the beach, humming and swaying softly as they watched us drift away.

  The music faded into the stillness of lapping water. I sighed and closed my eyes, feeling the warmth of the light of this dimension, soaking it up like I would the sun at home.

  We drifted like that for a timeless time when I felt a strange twinge in my stomach. I opened my eyes, but everything was still warm and peaceful. Pettikin and Suzy were dozing. A ripple in the water a few inches away from the boat expanded and drifted in uneven concentric circles away from its point of origin. I peered over the side of the leaf into the water and thought I saw a dark shadow swimming away.

  “Pettikin, are there fish here?”

  Pettikin’s eyes were closed, a peaceful smile on his face.

  “Probably,” he answered, without opening his eyes. “I can hear them singing the music of this dimension even from up here.”

  So the music hadn’t stopped, only I could no longer hear it, the same way I couldn’t understand the alpacas, I guess. Underneath the water, the shadow was gone, so I relaxed again. I closed my eyes and lost track of time.

  Suzy hummed, startling me out of my reverie. We were approaching the Gateway, and this time, no protective crystal dome surrounded it. As with the maze in the red dimension, it seemed that a barrier once dissolved remained dissolved.

  Suzy drifted through the Gateway ahead of us and disappeared.

  “This is getting easier, don’t you think, Pettikin?” I asked as our leaf approached the Gateway.

  He didn't answer but turned around and smiled at me, his eyes shining, and then everything went white.

  I felt like my soul was being tuned to a different frequency, stretched like a string so it would vibrate faster. I opened my eyes and was engulfed in the dazzling light and profound silence of the gold world. My body was in its lighter, almost transparent form. Suzy and Pettikin were shimmering apparitions in front of me, standing on the golden path that lead to the shining mesa in the distance. Curious ghosts floated by, but seemed less concerned about our presence than before, some ignoring us completely as they glided past, carrying their gourds of liquid light or bundles of golden flowers.

  Suzy began floating down the path, Pettikin following behind her. For a moment, like before, I couldn’t move, and it made me anxious. I closed my eyes and tried to relax. I reasoned with myself that, since nothing bad had happened in this dimension, I must be relatively safe here even if things seemed a little strange or scary. I felt my breathing slow, and after a few seconds, I opened my eyes and drifted, slowly and fitfully at first, but then more smoothly along the path behind Suzy and Pettikin.

  Despite my shaky start, it did feel a little less strange to be in this world than it had before. I felt a happy, peaceful feeling spreading through me, similar to being in the blue dimension, but quieter and deeper somehow, more inward than outward.

  Suzy and Pettikin stopped when they reached the diamond-shaped Gateway at the base of the mesa and waited for me. Ghost beings dissolved through and emerged from the shimmering web of light. One or two glanced at us as they passed, but most ignored us. Suzy waited until I joined them, and then we stepped, one by one, through the Gateway and zoomed up to the city on top of the mesa.

  Colorful ghosts drifted in and out of the crystalline buildings as we drifted toward the central dome. We passed a small park where a bright red being sat elegantly on a platform, a group of ghosts gathered in a semi-circle in front of the dais gazing up at him.

  “They are playing music,” Pettikin said.

  “Music?” I hadn’t heard anything since we arrived here. Like before, the silence of this dimension was deafening.

  “It’s not played out loud here—it’s composed and played telepathically. You can hear it the same way you can hear me if you concentrate.”

  I stopped and focused on the red ghost, trying to silence my mind, which I was starting to think might be the noisiest thing in this world.

  He turned his head toward me and grew brighter, as if he were smiling at me. I felt a strange, new presence in my mind, like a small thread or ribbon of light unravelling. As I focused on it, I suddenly felt, rather than heard, a beautiful, ethereal music, like a celestial choir holding and sustaining heavenly chords which shifted and resolved periodically, but never rested. It was less overtly joyful than the music of the blue world—deeper and more transcendent and completely mesmerizing. I stood transfixed and let the composition engulf me until I felt a gentle pressure in my head.

  “Suzy?” I surmised.

  “Yes. She says we need to go.”

  I smiled at the red being, trying to convey my thanks. He nodded at me once, almost imperceptibly, then returned his focus to the group in front of him.

  The two guards were still standing on either side of the ornate double-door Gateway entrance to the central dome, and even though, like before, they made no move to stop us from entering, I felt anxious. I wondered how my heart could be pounding faster when I was in this translucent, silent body. Did I even have a physical heart at the moment? Maybe my soul remembered that feeling from my regular body and was projecting it for my benefit. I was really going to need someone to explain the physics of all of this to me when I got home. I stepped through the soft curtain of light filaments into the dimly lit hall on the other side.

  Suzy and Pettikin were waiting for me just past the doorway. A universe turned slowly in the domed ceiling above us, and twelve golden beings, intense and powerful, watched us from their thrones.

  And now I was scared. Up until now, everything seemed much easier this time. But this was the part where I blew it before and blew it big time. The universe above us was already spinning, slowly at first, then faster and faster, zooming in on a planet and then on a Gateway. One by one a series of Gateways flashed by until only one remained, strands of light woven into dizzying patterns, filling the ceiling above us.

  This time I knew it was the right Gateway. I also knew that I wasn’t sure I could get us through it safely. This Gateway wanted me to dissolve completely to
go through it in a way the others didn’t. Whatever key Vala had given me for this dimension had utterly eluded me. I couldn’t go through this Gateway and still be me. How could Vala want this? How could any of them want this?

  Don’t be afraid.

  The voice in my head wasn’t Pettikin’s.

  The Guardian on the throne closest to me beckoned to me with a thin, arm-like appendage.

  I checked my immediate surroundings to make sure I wasn’t going to run into anything, and then willed myself toward her.

  She turned her head so I felt like she was looking into my eyes, even though she had no eyes. I felt waves of happiness and reassurance pouring into me. Part of me felt buoyed, like everything was going to be fine, but another part of me resisted that feeling—like a stubborn child in my mind who was determined to be terrified no matter what.

  I wondered inanely what my mom would think if she knew how many “mes” were running around in my head.

  The Guardian shifted her gaze lower, focusing on the area around my shoulders. I felt a sudden tightening in my throat and reached my hands for my neck. My mind flickered to the bat things, and I felt the grip of some invisible rope in my neck pulling tighter and tighter. Were they still in there? Had I been carrying them around all this time?

  The Guardian’s countenance shifted somehow so her gaze felt strong and fierce. The invisible cords binding my neck loosened somewhat and partially dissolved. I drew in a shaky breath and let my hands fall to my sides.

  The Guardian turned her gaze away, and, feeling that I had just stepped out of the beam of a lighthouse, I exhaled.

  “I have no idea what just happened.”

  Suzy snorted a telepathic huff in my mind.

  “What should we do, Allie?” Pettikin sounded as nervous as I was.