“I was fine with the kiss,” he confessed. “I just thought it kind of meant that maybe we were seeing each other as more than friends.”
“And I don’t want that,” I said a little too forcefully. Flinching, I continued.
“I didn’t mean it like that. I just think we’re better off stopping before someone gets hurt.”
“Someone like Chris?”
“Yes,” I answered, nodding. “I like him a lot, Evan. That was why I got into this whole mess to begin with. Now I think I should just let what’s going to happen, happen. Is that so wrong?”
“No,” he sighed. “I understand what you’re saying. I just don’t like it.”
“I’m sorry I can’t help distract you anymore,” I added quietly. “I hope you can deal with Steph on your own still.”
“It’s not that,” he laughed. “I liked kissing you Mara! I like you. That was why I brought up the whole deal in the first place. Yeah, we both needed a distraction from everything, but it was never just that for me.”
“Please don’t say that,” I gulped. “Don’t make this harder than it has to be.”
“You deserve to be with someone you can’t stop thinking about, not some guy you’re trying to stay away from because you think he’s going to mess up your career.”
He closed the fridge, walking towards me with a purpose in his eyes.
Trembling, I backed away, trying not to get caught up in what he was saying. This was not how I’d pictured this conversation going at all. I’d thought, at the most, he would be a little upset and we would talk about who else he could ask to hang out with him. But confessions of feelings? That had come out of left field.
Stumbling into the living room, I bumped into the couch and stopped cold, having nowhere to go short of running from the room and locking myself in the bathroom.
Evan crossed to me in two steps, his hands taking my face and holding me still. His body pressed against mine, almost pushing me over the arm of the sofa as he crushed me to him.
The kiss was unlike anything I’d felt before. His lips moved against mine with authority and passion, his tongue darting out to lick the inside of my mouth. My body shivered, giving me away, and I finally decided to just give in.
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I kissed him back, sighing as his hands slid from my face, down my neck, and onto my sides, brushing the sides of my breasts as he did so. His fingers dances around the hem of my shirt, tugging it up enough for his palms to slide under and rest on my belly. It felt so warm, his touch, like I’d been freezing to death and never knew until that moment.
Fingers tangling into his hair, I held onto him tighter, enjoying the rush of ecstasy coursing through my blood. Before I even realized what had happened, his hands had left my stomach and grabbed my thighs, pulling them up around his waist until I was sitting on the arm of the couch, pressed even closer to him than before. There was something about being open to him in that way that drove me mad, constantly telling me I needed more of him.
His teeth nipped at my bottom lip and I gasped, attacking his mouth all on my own, goose bumps flushing over my skin.
I wanted to feel him everywhere. Every inch of my skin called out to be touched by him, to be claimed by him and no one else. My heart hammered in my chest, feeling like it would explode from all the excitement.
Just when I thought I couldn’t get any more riled up, Evan hoisted me off the furniture like it was nothing, holding my legs around him as he carried me into my room, practically slamming me up against the wall as his mouth ravaged down my neck, teeth brushing over the skin on my collar bone.
I grabbed the back of his shirt, pulling it up so my hands could feel the muscles in his back. He was so perfect. Too perfect.
“Wait,” I gasped out, pushing on his shoulders.
“You deserve to be with someone who’s going to make you feel like that every day of your life,” he said, voice husky and eyes burning. “And I promise, it’s not Chris.”
“I can’t be with you,” I said breathlessly, half wishing he’d kiss me again instead of putting me down.
“Why not?” he asked, setting me down and taking a step back, his own breath labored.
“Lizzy—”
“Screw Lizzy!” he fumed.
“You don’t mean that,” I said sadly.
“I do if it’s going to keep me from you.”
“I promised I would talk to you. She’s worried about you and I think she has a right to be. I can’t mess up our friendship because of . . .”
“Because of me?”
I nodded, biting my lip as I felt the urge to cry. This was all so wrong and twisted from what I’d thought it really was.
He ran a hand through his hair, cursing under his breath as he turned his back on me. Just as quickly as he looked away, he moved back towards me again, a pleading look in his eyes.
“If you go with him I’ll never be able to touch you like this again.”
His fingers caressed the side of my face, eyes begging me not to say what he didn’t want to hear.
“I know,” I said quietly, lip trembling. “This isn’t what I want, though.”
“So now you need a distraction from me. Is that it?” he asked angrily.
“I can’t be with you,” I repeated again, not knowing what else to say. “I’m going to say yes to Chris.”
He nodded, fuming as he looked at the floor, hands on his hips.
“Have fun with that,” he finally said, turning and leaving just as suddenly as he’d come.
As soon as the front door slammed shut, I slid down the wall, tears streaming from my eyes. Everything that had just happened felt like a dream, no a nightmare, one that I desperately wished had never happened. It’d never even occurred to me that while I was starting to have feelings for Evan, he was starting to have them for me.
What if it wasn’t that at all? What if he’d just taken his distraction too far?
I didn’t feel like a distraction.
Wrapping my arms around my legs, I rested my chin on my knees, my now mangled hair falling into my face.
Why was I crying? Didn’t I want to break up with Evan? Chris was the one I wanted to be with. That was what got me in trouble in the first place.
Wiping my eyes, I took a few deep breaths and stood, walking to the bathroom. My phone was sitting on the sink, waiting for me to dial whoever I wanted.
Picking it up, I opened my contacts list, hovering over Lizzy’s name for a moment. She was out shopping and I didn’t want to bother her, especially if she was just going to tell me I’d done the right thing.
I called Chris instead, smiling softly as his voice greeted me from the other end of the line.
“You okay?” he asked, concern in his voice. “You sound upset.”
“I’m fine,” I lied. “I stubbed my toe.”
“That’s no fun. I’m assuming that’s not why you called, though?”
He chuckled and I smiled, waiting for the lump in my throat to clear before I answered.
“No. I was wondering if you wanted to get dinner tonight. Nothing fancy, just the two of us having some fun.”
“I would love that,” he answered. “I know the perfect spot. Are you sure you don’t want to get dressed up and hit the town?”
“I just need a night with you,” I said, frowning at my reflection in the mirror.
“Then that’s what you’ll get. Pick you up around eight?”
“Sounds wonderful,” I said lamely. “I’ll be ready.”
“Hey, are you sure you’re okay?” he asked again. “This sounds like a little more than a stubbed toe. I can come get you earlier. Now, if you’d like.”
“No, I have the lunch shift in about an hour,” I said, clearing my throat. “I’m fine, really.”
“Okay, I’ll see you in a few hours then.”
Chapter Sixteen
“Are you sure you have to go?”
Chris ran his hand down the length of my back, his skin whispering over
the silkiness of my dress.
“Yes,” I giggled, leaning in and stealing another kiss.
He quickly grabbed my face in his hands and held me there, drinking in what I had to offer. It felt like I could float away on a cloud, I was so happy.
“We don’t even have to do anything,” he insisted, his lips moving against mine. “We can just sleep. I want to know what it’s like to wake up to your face.”
“No!” I said, pushing myself up off his couch and walking over to the window. “I probably have bad morning breath and my makeup will be all runny. You’ll never see me the same way again.”
“I don’t care,” he said, joining me. His lips brushed over my bare shoulder as his arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me close.
“We have to leave some of the magic intact,” I laughed, leaning into him.
“You’re such a tease!” he moaned, rest his chin on the top of my head.
We’d gone out to dinner and a movie, followed by a walk back to his apartment. My heart soared to be with him and to know that he wanted me in that way, but something didn’t feel quite right. I wasn’t ready to give it all away, yet.
“Of course, I will take you home.” He sighed and kissed my shoulder again before releasing me. “Keep enjoying the view while I grab my coat.” He smiled and turned to walk into his room.
“Thank you,” I called after him. It was relieving to know I would never be pushed into anything I didn’t want to do.
Two weeks. That’s how long it had been since Evan kissed me and asked me to choose him. Every night had been spent either at work or with Chris, who was turning out to be a surprisingly good boyfriend. I didn’t have any regrets. I was perfectly happy the way I was.
At least that was what I kept telling myself.
Chris was back almost in an instant and grabbed my hand, kissing it as he led me to the door.
“When can I see you again?” he asked once we were in the elevator.
“I don’t know,” I said half teasing and half honestly.
“You do know how to make a man crazy,” he growled, pulling me up against him and crushing his mouth to mine.
Before I knew what was happening, my back was against the wall and I was lost in what had to be the second most passionate kiss I’d ever experienced. My heart raced as I held him tightly, moving against him in a way that could only be described as longing.
Chris’s lips pressed against mine hungrily as his hands slid down my sides, grabbing onto my hips and pulling them as close as possible to his. His breath was catching, and I could feel the tremble in his touch.
A bell sounded and we instantly parted, smoothing out clothes and wiping our mouths before the doors opened. He took my hand as we crossed the threshold, acting as if nothing had happened.
I felt thoroughly bothered, but in a good way. It was all I could do to keep from telling him to do it again. The thrumming in my chest scolded me for asking to be taken home in the first place. I liked this kind of distraction.
“Mr. Williams,” the man at the front desk said with a nod.
“Good evening, Michael,” Chris said with a smile.
We walked through the front doors and surveyed the line of waiting cabs. Among them was a black stretch limo. As soon as he smiled at me, I knew exactly what Chris was thinking.
“You don’t need to spend that much money,” I laughed.
It was no use, though. Within minutes we were comfortably seated in the back while the driver headed towards Harlem.
“Thank you,” Chris said again as he rolled up the privacy screen.
“I’ve never ridden in a limo before,” I giggled.
“I’m sorry that you won’t get to experience it fully,” he said seriously.
“What do you mean?”
He grabbed my hand and pulled me as close to him as he could get before attacking my mouth once more.
My breath caught as he rested his hand on my thigh, just under the hem of my skirt. My brain screamed at me to stop now, if I wasn’t ready to go right back to his place.
“Wait,” I said breathlessly, a laugh escaping me. “Calm down for a minute.”
“You’re going to kill me,” he laughed as well, breaking away as I asked, but still holding onto my hand.
“I’m sorry,” I said sympathetically. “I’m just not ready to go that far, yet.”
Unless it’s with Evan.
Whoa! Nope. Not going there.
“I understand,” he said with a smile. “One can hope, though.”
“Thanks,” I chuckled nervously, trying to banish the thought of his kiss once more.
“When can I see you again, really?”
“I’m actually not sure. I signed up for a couple of classes to stay on top of my performing stuff. It’s going to take up a lot of my evenings.”
“Well, that’s no fun,” he frowned.
“I’m sorry,” I grimaced. “I really need to stay in shape, though.”
“I’ll call you then. How does that sound?”
“It sounds wonderful.”
I smiled appreciatively at him as the car rolled to a stop.
“I’ll walk you up,” he said as the driver opened the door for us.
We walked into the building hand in hand, talking together as we climbed the stairs.
“So, I was wondering if you would like to attend a benefit dinner with me next month?” he asked casually as we reached my floor.
“Of course!”
“It’s a black tie event,” he added. “There will probably be some people there you could make good work connections with.”
“Thank you for thinking of me,” I beamed as we reached my door.
“I wouldn’t want to bring anyone else,” he said softly, pulling me gently against him.
He looked into my eyes as a hand wove its way into my hair. As he leaned in to kiss me, though, the door flew open and shocked us both apart.
“Mara!” Evan said in surprise. “It’s late. I thought you weren’t coming home tonight.”
He looked positively gleeful to see me on the doorstep. Chris, on the other hand, did not look so happy to be interrupted.
“Hi, Evan,” I said, embarrassed. “I didn’t know you were coming over tonight.”
“Liz got bored without you,” he replied with a huge grin. “I have to go now, though. It was good to see you.” He squeezed between the two of us and closed the door behind him. I knew he was thrilled to have interrupted my goodnight kiss.
“Have a good night,” he said, his arm brushing up against mine as he headed down the hall.
Goose bumps formed where he’d touched me, my skin remembering what it felt like to be scorched by him in a mere instant. I laughed uncomfortably, rubbing the spot as I turned back to my date.
“Okay.” Chris said once Evan was out of sight.
He pulled me to him and gently kissed me on the lips. We were both quickly lost in the moment.
“I’m sorry,” Evan’s voice said from behind us. “I forgot my phone.”
I jumped back from Chris in shock, and Evan wiggled between us and back into the apartment, closing the door once again. His mouth had been pressed into a grim line, like he’d just received bad news.
Chris laughed and grabbed me again, oblivious to the battle of emotions passing between Evan and I, and pressed his lips against my neck.
Unfortunately for Chris and totally expected by me, the door opened once again.
This time Evan only cleared his throat before pressing past us, looking downright pissed as he stared at me. Finally, he was out of sight for good—hopefully.
Just as Chris reached out to me once more, the door opened, again.
“Evan, wha—” Lizzy yelled after him, stopping when she saw the two of us standing there. “Sorry!” she squeaked, quickly shutting the door again.
“If I try to kiss you right now, is someone going to come and interrupt us?” Chris laughed.
Instead of answering, I kissed him
myself, wrapping my arms around his neck. Evan’s appearance had made me angry and I took it out on Chris’s mouth, something he didn’t seem to mind one bit.
“You’re still welcome to come back with me,” he flirted once our lips parted.
“Good night,” I laughed, doing my best to calm my bristled feelings as I opened the door and crossed the threshold.
“I’ll call you,” he said again.
“Looking forward to it.”
I smiled at him one more time and then closed the door, leaning against it and sighing contently once it was locked.
“I am soooo sorry!”
Lizzy was sitting on the couch, the most apologetic look I’d ever seen on her face.
“You’re fine,” I laughed, sliding my shoes off.
“Evan was acting down all night, and then when he came back to get his phone he was laughing. I have no idea what got into him.”
“What had him so down?” I asked, knowing that the laughter was caused from interrupting Chris and I.
“I have no idea,” she sighed. “He seemed okay when he came over. The later it got the more upset he got, though. It’s like he was waiting for something and it never happened. At least he left happy, I guess. Except he seemed upset again right there at the end.”
“I’m sure he’s fine,” I replied stonily. “He seemed fine when I saw him.”
I can’t believe he was here waiting to see if I was coming home! I told him we couldn’t be together. I expected him to respect that, not act like a kid who can’t have candy.
“I’m so sorry, Chris.”
I covered my eyes with my hand, resting my elbow on the table I sat at. I’d stopped for coffee at a cute little shop and decided to sit outside, even though the weather was steadily getting chillier with each day. It was a somewhat shocking change for my desert system. I was used to not having to wear a jacket until October, and even then it was more of a light sweater.
“You’re sure you can’t get out of it?” he asked from his end of the phone call.
“I’m sure. April said that this lady was the best thing that ever happened to her career. I can’t let something like that get by me.”
“I just miss you, that’s all,” he said with a short laugh. “We haven’t gotten to spend much time together this week.”
Taking Chances: A Sweet Contemporary Romance (Dreams) Page 13
