HOLLIS MCCALISTER SUMMER CAMP

by Keith McCloud

  I think I am finished getting all my camping gear together. Let me look at my checklist that I made for items that I would need. Okay, again I need my all-purpose knife, flashlight, bug spray, rope to keep in my backpack, and lighter, and everything else they should have at summer camp. I guess I should go and take my stuff now.

  Before we leave I need to put some snacks in my backpack so I will have extra things to eat besides what they have at camp. So let me open some of these kitchen cabinets. Oh yes, I see a box of wrapped peanut butter crackers, and let’s open another cabinet, and oh yes, a box full of Snickers. Now I just need to grab me several bags of lunch-size potato chips, and I will put all my snacks that I have collected into a separate backpack that I am bringing just for snacks. I am not starving this year like I did last year. The more snacks I can bring, the better.

  They only feed you three times a day: breakfast, lunch and dinner. It is up to you to bring any snacks that you want. It used to not be that way and they had plenty of snacks for you until last year. Of course I did not know this last year and was always hungry. That will not be the case this year.

  * * *

  CHAPTER 3: THE BUS

  * * *

  L et me pick up my backpacks so I can get ready to go outside. “Mom, I am ready to go, I am taking my stuff out to the car.”

  “Alright, I will be right out. The car is unlocked so just load up your stuff,” Mom says.

  “Okay, out the front door onto the porch I go,” I reply. I go to the car and put my backpack in along with my suitcase, which has all my clothes, and I put more batteries and my flashlights in there. “Mom, are you ready to go?”

  “I am on my way. Your sister Irene wants to go to a few yard sales this morning after I drop you off,” Mom says.

  “I don’t understand why you guys love those crazy yard sales. That’s all you do is go to yard sales.”

  “You are going to have a lot of fun: just enjoy your time while you are young. Irene, are you ready to go?” Mom yells.

  Irene yells out the front door, “I am on my way out in just a second, I need to get my purse.”

  “Okay, let’s go get in the car, Mom, and we will just wait on her. I hope she comes out soon, I don’t want to be late. That just adds more attention to me and I am not looking forward to this at all. I can see it now, I will be getting harassed by Jimmy Stewart the whole time we are there, from the time I get onto the bus until the time we arrive back and I get off the bus. Sometimes I wish he would just move away so I didn’t have to deal with him anymore. He is such a pain in the backside,” I say.

  “One day in life, believe it or not, you are going to miss old Jimmy Stewart,” Mom says. She is always trying to find the good in everyone. Whether they deserve it or not. They hear the front door shut and they hear Irene saying, “Dang it, I forgot to put my wallet in my purse.” She looks out to the car and says, “Let me get my wallet and I will be right there.” She goes back into the house, finds her wallet then puts it in her purse, and then heads back out the door. She shuts and locks the front door and then walks towards the car. She has her purse in one hand and another bag of snacks and a change of clothes in the other. She opens the back seat door behind the driver’s seat and puts her stuff in the car and then gets in and sits down.

  “Why do you always have so many bags with you?” I ask.

  Irene says, “I need snacks so we don’t have to buy any food while we are driving around to yard sales. Then I have a change of clothes in case it rains because it is supposed to rain today.”

  “Well, you are all set, then. Would you like to go to camp for me since I do not want to go? You would have a great time: you are more social than I am.”

  Irene says back, “No, I am okay, I have to work and what would I do if I couldn’t go to yard sales for two weeks?”

  Mom starts the car and starts backing it up and says, “Don’t forget to put your seat belts on.” We then start traveling down the street headed toward the church so that they can meet the bus.

  “Well, it’s 7:15 and we need to be there by 7:30, so I can’t believe we are going to be on time. That’s surprising for us because we are always late for stuff, or I should say you guys are always making me late.”

  Mom says, “Now, Hollis, we are not always making you late for things. I can’t help it if your sister Irene is never ready when we are and that we always have to wait on her.”

  Irene says, “What? That’s not true.” Mom looks back at her through the rear-view mirror and Hollis turns back and looks at her. “Okay, okay, most of the time I am still getting ready, but I just like to make sure I have everything I need before I go somewhere.”

  “It’s alright, you wouldn’t be you if you were ever on time. We have grown used to it and we plan our time around your tardiness,” I say.

  Irene says, “Okay, enough about me, let’s talk about you. Are you going to have fun at camp? You know you are most likely not going to have any internet: what are you going to do with no internet?”

  “Well, actually they do have wireless internet in the main hall. So I will be able to get on the internet when we have downtime. Also the wireless used to be pretty strong there and last year I could pick it up in my cabin. So I will get to go on my computer while I am there.”

  Mom says, “You better then e-mail me a couple of times to let me know how you are doing. I don’t want to have to call you because you said that you get embarrassed when I do that.” “That’s because they announce it over the speakers and say, ‘Hollis, your mom is on the phone’. No thanks: the guys have never let me live that down.”

  Irene says, “Now that is funny. Come on, Mom, call him, or maybe I will call him.”

  “Do not let her have the phone number.”

  All of a sudden we hear a loud bang. Mom says, “Hold on, I think we just had a blowout.” She pulls the car off to the side of the road.

  “You are kidding me, right? This cannot be happening. Why do I have such crappy luck? This is a sign for me not to go. Bad things are going to happen. Let’s fix the tire and just go back to the house.”

  Mom says, “Hollis, settle down, it’s just a flat. We must have picked up a nail in the tire when we went to that new Walmart the other day. You know how they don’t clean the parking lots that well after they build new places and they leave some nails in the parking lot. We will call AAA and see if they can come and help us.” Mom stops the car and then takes her cellphone out and calls AAA.

  “AAA will be here in about 15 minutes. I will call the preacher and let him know that we are running late and please hold the bus for you.”

  “No, you can tell them to leave, it’s okay, I don’t have to go.”

  Mom calls the preacher and then hangs up. Mom says, “Well, Hollis, everything is okay, they are going to come by here with the bus and pick you up. You see, you are meant to go on this trip.”

  “Great, now the harassment will start even earlier.” Irene looks over at Hollis and just starts to laugh at him.

  Irene says, “You do have some dumb luck, don’t you? I can’t wait till the bus pulls up and everyone starts laughing at you. This is going to be fun.”

  “Shut up. The longer it takes to get the tire fixed, the longer you have to wait until you get to go to the yard sales. That means you are not going to get to buy any junk.”

  * * *

  CHAPTER 4: THE BUS RIDE

  * * *

  W hile we are waiting for AAA to show up we can hear cheering coming from down the road. It sounds like singing and that it is coming from the church bus. The bus then pulls off the side of the road and the preacher hollers out, “Come on, Hollis!” Jimmy Stewart is hanging out the window yelling, “Loser, loser, loser!” He is trying to get other kids to join in his chant, but no one is.

  The preacher yells out the window to Mom and says, “AAA is coming around the corner: are you going to be alright?”

  Mom says, “Yes, we will be fine now, thank you.”

/>   “Let me get my stuff out of the car. And then I will be right over and get on the bus.”

  Jimmy yells out from the back of the bus, “Loser, sit upfront!”

  The preacher says, “Jimmy, settle down and be nice: you are a counselor this year, now act like one.” What? A counselor? This just keeps getting better and better.

  Jake says, “Hollis, you can sit next to me, it’s alright.” “Thanks, Jake. I can’t believe he is going to be a counselor this year. He is going to harass me the whole time we are gone.”

  Jake says, “Don’t worry about him. I will keep him from bothering you.”

  “Thanks, Jake, but he will find a way. You know if there is a will, there is a way, and his ambition in life right now is to harass me.”

  The bus is the church’s school bus. It looks like a regular school bus, big and yellow. It is a fairly big bus. It is also full of people going to camp. Wow, two hours on this bus: I am going to go crazy. Maybe I will take a nap. No, I had better not: I don’t trust Jimmy. Jake is sitting next to me so I am sure he wouldn’t let Jimmy mess with me, but no, I still don’t trust him. He would probably still throw something at me. Only a couple miles into the ride and Jimmy will not shut up: he just keeps on talking and talking so loud. He picks on everyone. I luck out by sitting by Jake because so far he is leaving me alone. I hope I don’t get sick on this bus. You know that motion sickness thing really puts a damper on things. I am wearing my wristband that puts little shocks into my wrist. I should be okay. I think I will take a little nap. I just can’t stay awake.

  Next thing I know, I hear Jake saying, “Hollis, wake up. Hollis, we are almost there. You took a good nap.”

  “Okay, I am up. I hope I wasn’t snoring, and who did Jimmy bother while I was asleep?”

  Jake says, “You didn’t snore at all, and Jimmy also went to sleep, so he wasn’t bothering anyone.”

  “Dang, I wish I had been awake: we could have bothered him so he could see how it feels.”

  The preacher, Mr Miller, yells out to everyone, “We are about 15 minutes out, so start gathering your items around you!” I really don’t have anything to gather since I never took anything out of my bag. I can’t believe Jimmy woke up and told

  us all we were being too loud on the bus. Oh, my back is killing me: these bus seats are so hard and they are not comfortable. Wow, I need to get off this bus and stretch.

  Preacher Miller says, “Okay, we are coming through the small town Wo’Brian and then we will be eventually turning onto a dirt road for a couple of miles and we will finally be at the camp.”

  I was thinking, I remember that dirt road and it’s a very bumpy road. When he said a small town, Wo’Brian is a very small town. I think we just passed it. Wo’Brian has a small, flashing light, a little grocery store and post office: just a nice little small town. We are now turning on that long, two-mile, bumpy, bumpy road. After bouncing and feeling like my fillings have bounced out of my teeth we are finally there.

  * * *

  CHAPTER 5: MADE IT TO CAMP

  * * *

  P reacher Miller stands up and says, “Okay, we are here. Now you will need to sign in and get your cabin assignments and then go to your cabins. You will have a couple hours to settle in before we meet at the lunch cabin. Meet at the lunch cabin at 1:00 and it is now 11:00 am.”

  I am hoping that they got my room request and it is without Jimmy in my cabin, please, please and more please: well, I didn’t really put in a room request since I really didn’t know I was actually going to have to come to camp this year. Okay, I am up to the table to sign in with my fingers crossed. Yes, I am not in Jimmy’s cabin. I am in with Jake and a couple other guys from other churches around the state and from other states. The cabins are set up with a common area which is like a living room with a couple of couches and chairs and a TV (but there is terrible reception out here in the woods), and then a small kitchen area with a refrigerator and sink and a microwave and a stove, but no gas in the stove. I guess they don’t want us to burn down the place. You then have four big bedrooms with two full-size beds in each room along with two dressers and two closets, and then in the center is a huge bathroom that has several shower areas along with sinks and private toilet areas. We luck out and get a brand new cabin and the new wood smells great. Each cabin is set up with central air and heat which is very good since it gets so hot and sometimes cold depending on what time of the year you are here. So at least if I have to be here, I can stay somewhat in comfort.

  Jake and I end up in the same cabin, which is good because I know him - well, somewhat. I can spend this time unpacking my stuff and just relax for a few minutes. I know how our first day goes. We will go eat lunch for an hour and then we are to go back to our cabins and we are supposed to get to know our cabin mates. We have to then go back for dinner and then we have to introduce each other - meaning I have to introduce one of my cabin mates and then they have to introduce me and I can’t like introduce Jake and him, me: we have to pick someone we don’t know. I hate doing this because I hate speaking in front of people. I am very shy and it makes me sick. Okay, it is lunchtime so we are going to the food cabin and I am hungry so I am trying to get Jake to walk a little faster.

  As we are walking I am thinking that I have forgotten how big the camp is. There are so many cabins here, but this is the camp that everyone uses. Lunches are usually some type of sandwich: sometimes they will have hamburgers, turkey burgers and hot dogs, but most of the time it is sandwiches and they are set up like little sandwiches so you can mix it up a little between peanut butter and jelly, ham, turkey or grilled cheese. Then of course potato chips, or macaroni salad, or potato salad. The food cabin is huge: it is where we come for breakfast, lunch and dinner. It is also the auditorium, and it has a stage area up at the front. I am not sure how many people it holds, but there are a lot of tables and a real big fireplace. This also is another new building, or big cabin. It looks great.

  Preacher Miller walks up to the stage and goes up the side steps and then walks across the stage to the microphone and says, “Don’t forget after you are all done you will go back to your cabins and then each one of you is to get to know one cabin mate. You will then at dinner come back and give a brief introduction about each other. I call it a great icebreaker.”

  Of course I am thinking: why do we have to get up and then talk in front of everyone? Why can’t we just get to know them? Now this is going to bother me all afternoon and I am going to worry about it, and not be able to concentrate on even asking anyone any questions. This is just crazy.

  “Hollis, are you okay? You look a little pale,” Jake asks.

  “I am okay, but I hate speaking in front of people.”

  “It will be okay, we will be fast at it and then it will be all done. Don’t worry about it,” he says.

  “I will try not to, but that’s easier said than done. I will be worrying all afternoon until we actually do it and get it done.” I am not going to tell him that, right now, just thinking about it, I want to go and throw up. This just stinks. I am getting very nervous and this food is making me want to throw up. I can’t eat any more so I think I will go back to the cabin. I get up from the table with my tray and Jake says, “Hey, where you going?”

  “I am going back to the cabin. I am not feeling well.” “Hey, it’s going to be okay, stop worrying,” Jake says. I leave and put my tray up after dumping all my trash. I walk back to our cabin and go to my room. I decide to pull out my laptop and start working on it. About 20 minutes later, I hear people coming in the door. I hear Jake say after everyone takes about a 30-minute break we will all meet in the living room. Then Jake comes into my room and says, “Hollis, are you sure you are okay? We are just going to get to know each other. We will ask a few questions and then when we go back over for dinner, we will just get up there and only say about three things about the other person. By the way, your cabin mate should be here any minute now. Their bus was broken down.”

 
“I am not worried about getting to know the other person, I am just worrying about getting up in front of all those people, and you know I hate getting in front of people, especially if I have to speak in front of them. I am worrying myself sick about this. I have already thrown up twice just thinking about it,” I say.

  Jake says, “Camp is not a place to come and be worried about things and especially getting sick over it. I promise you it will be okay. I will ask if we can go first and then you can hurry up and say three things about the person and you will be done and then you can relax.”

  “Why don’t you just speak for me and then I wouldn’t have to worry about it at all? I know you can’t do that for me and I trust you when you say not to worry about it, but I still do,” I say. Since Jake is one of the counselors, he calls us all into the living room. He has two different brown bags with names on them. For example, my name is on one bag, and then the other bag has Jake’s name on it. Each cabin mate from the same church name is in a different bag: this way, since each cabin has two people in it from the same church, you are guaranteed not to have two people’s names picked from the same bag.

  Jake says, “Hollis, why don’t you come up and pull out the first name?”

  I say, “Okay.” I walk over to the center of the room and Jake opens the bag and I put my hand down into the bag and I can feel a couple of pieces of paper and then I pull one out and hand it to Jake.

  He says, “Okay, let me open this and see who you picked. The name you picked is James Jones from Alabama, who just got here, he is also your roommate.”

  I say, “Cool. I have never met anyone from Alabama before so now I can get to know about that area.” I then walk over and sit down in one of the chairs. Jake keeps calling up people one by one until they have all picked names out of each bag. He then says, “Okay, now go and find a spot where you can meet your new cabin mates. You will need to ask them three questions. One, what is their name? Two, where are they from? The last question is in two parts - how many family members do they have, and what is their favorite hobby? Okay, go get to know each other and really get to find out about each other: you don’t have to tell everyone what you all find out about each other, you just need to talk about the three main questions.”