Azaleas Don't Bloom Here

by Frank Klus

  “Listen, the Piper woman is right at the door. You storm the room and you sign her death warrant. Got it?”

  Armstrong pulled the limping Piggy along back to the gurney, and then he gave a hand signal to Ray and Cassandra. He held up his two index fingers side by side. Then he moved one finger away from the other, to the back of the other hand. Ray understood, and separated from Cassandra, circling around behind Sandra’s car. Armstrong yelled over to Colderon. “Listen up. Let Pamela go, and then we’ll let you leave freely. If you don’t, we kill Piggy and your two men outside. Got it?”

  Colderon steamed, but didn’t answer. He looked at Moon and Murph, and figured they’d be no help. He needed Piggy, but it would mean trading Piper for him. Another option would be to wait for the motel manager to come and force the issue. A third option would be to call the police. It was the riskiest of all. The police might believe they’re on orders from Casimir and turn all of them over to him or arrest all of them.

  Armstrong called over to Colderon. “Let Pamela go now or I will take out the two guys outside. Make your decision in the next two minutes.”

  Colderon knew if he let Pamela go he’d have no bargaining power. The two outside were little help to him now. “I want Sulke!”

  “Foote, it’s Armstrong. Are you sure no one else is in the back?”

  “No, Chad. They’re all in front.”

  “Send Wrenn down at the other end of the building. I want three people on those two ground Hogs and you on the roof.”

  The three began closing in on the Hogs, who began to panic.

  “Hey, wait a minute,” one of them called out.

  “Come out of there,” yelled Armstrong, who stepped out of Ray’s room, next to Colderon. “Come out and you won’t be hurt.”

  The two came crawling out of the cargo van and surrendered. They were disarmed, handcuffed, and put in the same room with Piggy. Colderon saw what was going on, but figured they were expendable. He still had Pamela Piper, and she was his ticket out now.

  “Hey, Armstrong, you let us out with Pamela and give me Piggy, and the rest of you can go free. How ‘bout it Armstrong? Chad?”

  “Let me think about it.”

  With the outside Hogs, who he was calling ground Hogs, out of the picture Chad called Ray, Cassandra, and Wrenn over for a little pow wow. He still wanted Foote on the roof for extra security. They met in the parking lot behind the Suburban.

  A few minutes later Armstrong came near the room. “All right. We’ll get Piggy, but you surrender Pamela as soon as you’re free.”

  “Sure,” came the answer; both sides sure the other was lying.

  Armstrong went over to Schmidt’s room and gave the secret knock, but no one answered. He called for Schmidt, but there was still no answer. Suddenly three shots were fired from inside through the door, just missing Armstrong. Ray and Cassandra came running over to see what was going on. Wrenn watched for Colderon. They all looked at each other in bewilderment. Armstrong called Foote and let him know to watch that door too. At once Colderon came barreling out of his room, pushing Pamela in front. Moon and Murph followed and shot upwards toward Foote. Foote took cover, but Moon and Murph were shot at from the four on the ground. Moon panicked and dropped his weapon. Murph shot back and was killed. Colderon then sped out of the parking lot, but drove erratically and then stopped. Pamela came screaming out of the van. Colderon then jumped out and began shooting at Pamela. Pamela went down, and then Colderon went down in a hail of bullets. They all rushed to see what happened to Pamela, but she was all right.

  Pamela was breathing hard, but was calming down. “He put his gun away, and so I opened the door to jump out. He tried to grab me, and then pulled his gun out, but I jumped out when he hit the break.”

  “That’s why he was driving so erratically,” Wrenn said.

  “Yes. I knew I had to act fast. I figured I’d be as good as dead anyway, so I tried to jump out. Then he shot at me. I knew he would, so I ducked and just lay on the ground.”

  Ray and Cassandra went after Moon, but couldn’t find him. The weapon he dropped was gone too.

  Ray came back to report to Armstrong. “I don’t know where he is, but he’s armed. Should we go after him?”

  “We may have a bigger problem in Schmidt’s room. Be on the alert.”

  Chad called Foote. “I was shooting at Colderon,” Foote said. “When I looked back for the other guy, he was gone.”

  The five carefully made their way toward the room of their captives and found the door wide open. Inside, the two doctors were dead. Schmidt had his throat slashed and Grifton had been shot. The assassins and Piggy were gone.

  Armstrong went to Eugene’s room and gave the secret knock. “That you, Armstrong?” came a voice from someone, but not Eugene. “You gave away the secret knock. Here’s the new deal—ha ha—let us go and I don’t harm your friends; otherwise, I’ll kill them.”

  Armstrong recognized Piggy’s voice. It appeared they were in an even worse position than before. Now they had Eugene and Sandra, and an armed pointman on the loose.

  Armstrong needed to do something quickly. It was now five o’clock and the manager or owner would be coming in at six. There was no telling what he’d do when he found out what was going on. Armstrong had to make a quick decision, and conferred with his comrades. Pamela was sent to her room so as to be out of danger. Wrenn was sent to Colderon’s white van. Armstrong called Foote, and everyone understood what to do. Foote stood right over the door with his rifle trained on the area just outside.

  “All right, Piggy. We’ll do it your way. Come on out.”

  “It’s a trap,” yelled one of the ground Hogs.

  “Shut up!” Piggy yelled, but he was still wobbly from being shot, as well as the chemicals the doctors used on him.

  “Put your weapons down on the ground where I can see them,” Piggy demanded. The four did so. Sulke, with hands tied behind his back, emerged first, followed by Piggy, holding a piece to Eugene’s back. Then came Sandra, followed by the two ground Hogs.

  “Anybody tries anything, and Sulke dies. Understand?” Piggy yelled.

  “Everything’s cool,” Armstrong said, reassuringly.

  “You, on the roof,” one of them yelled. “Put your weapon down.”

  “Anyone shoots,” Piggy yelled, “and Sulke gets it. Get it?”

  There were shouts of “Okay.”

  While this was going on Ray slipped into Eugene’s room and came out a minute later, nodding affirmatively.

  Armstrong’s phone rang.

  “Chad, I just spotted that escapee. He’s armed with a revolver. He was hiding in the bushes next to the office. He’s sneaking around to the side of the building.”

  “Can you get a bead on him?” Armstrong said, speaking in a low voice.

  “Not yet.”

  “Keep your eye on him. Take him out when you can.”

  They got to the cargo van, but the doors were locked. They turned around and saw Armstrong smiling while twirling the keys around his finger. Piggy and the other two guys looked around but didn’t see anyone else.

  “It’s a trap,” one of them yelled. “I fucking knew it.”

  “Shut up,” Piggy yelled back.

  Then Piggy began yelling at Armstrong. “Give me those keys, Armstrong. Where are your friends? I told you I’d kill those two if you try anything.”

  “Relax, Piggy. I’ll give them to you.” Armstrong was calm as he walked toward the van, twirling the keys around his index finger a little faster now. Piggy gave the gun he was using to one of the ground Hogs, whispering instructions.

  Now Piggy was smiling. “Doesn’t matter what your game is, Armstrong. I’ve got orders to kill Sulke. It’ll just be plain ole fun to put a bullet in him.” Grinning, his white teeth shining against his dark lips, he held out his left hand to take the keys. Armstrong, still grinning and twirling, let the keys fly off his finger just as he approached Piggy.

  Piggy just grinned at A
rmstrong. He laughed, and looked over to one of his Hogs, “Do Sulke now.”

  Armstrong was unfazed as a shot from Wrenn rang out and Piggy collapsed to the ground. Moon got spooked and came running from the building to take dead aim on Armstrong, but missed. His revolver had poor range from that distance. Now exposed, Foote drew a bead on him, and took him out.

  Sandra screamed, and Eugene was frightened out of his mind. The guy with the gun aimed right at Eugene’s head and pulled the trigger. Nothing happened.

  Ray came over. “Need some help? This one works,” he said as he calmly shot the gunman. The last guy fled and headed to Pamela’s room. He figured his only chance now was to grab Pamela and make his escape. He pushed through the broken door and saw Pamela standing there. He smiled and moved to grab her but Pamela pulled the gun from her back and shot him dead.

  Ray came running over, saw what happened, and smiled.

  “He didn’t give the secret knock,” she said calmly. “They surprised me the first time, but this time I wasn’t taking any chances.”

  Eugene then bent over Sandra, who had fainted, and helped her up. Pamela came out, saw Sandra on the ground, and came running over to them. But everyone was okay.

  Eugene turned to Chad in astonishment. “You knew that gun wouldn’t fire.”

  Chad smiled. “It was the same gun I gave to Dr. Schmidt. I didn’t trust him with a loaded weapon so I removed the clip and put an empty one in instead. I left him with one bullet in the chamber. When we entered his room we saw the two dead doctors. Our three prisoners were disarmed, but I must have missed the knife one of them had. He probably cut himself free, surprised Schmidt, and slit his throat, taking his gun. He probably got Grifton to wake up Piggy, and then shot him with the only bullet he had.”

  “But Eugene had a gun too,” said Sandra. “He had the gun when I opened the door.”

  “Yeah, but I put it away.”

  Foote nodded. “I told him to keep it in the top drawer. I didn’t want him carrying it around.”

  “Exactly!” Armstrong said.

  “I confirmed the gun was still there,” Ray said.

  “Folks,” Armstrong said, “you were never ever in real danger, except for that pointman with the pea shooter. Foote already had him under cover.”

  “I hate to break up this happy ending, people,” Pamela said, “but we’ve got a bunch of dead bodies, bullet holes, a busted in door—and the manager will be here in ten minutes. We better…how’d you put it…oh yeah, skedaddle on out of here.”

  Cassandra just smiled. “I’ll explain it all to the manager when he comes in.”

  Pamela was astounded. “Are you crazy? We got to get out of here, now. This place will be crawling with cops. What if they’re on their way now?”

  Armstrong was more relaxed. “Point one. Unless one of us or them called the police, they aren’t on the way. The reason is that the other wing of the motel is closed down for the winter. We’re the only ones here.

  “Second, the manager knows our vehicles, can identify us, and we’d be caught as fugitives running from multiple murders.”

  “Cassandra is about as good as it gets at convincing someone of our good intentions,” Ray said.

  Sandy and Eugene wanted to know what her plan was.

  Cassandra explained. “A motorcycle gang was bent on rape, robbery, and murder. They came in the middle of the night, there was a shootout, and we killed them. Their bikes are still in the cargo van.”

  “He’s going to call the police and let them do their own investigation,” Pamela said.

  “You do have the doctors’ money, huh? And Sandy’s?” Cassandra said.

  “Yeah.”

  “We’ll need about ten grand of the money. It’ll be needed for repairs to the motel, and that manager will come out financially ahead. Sure, he’ll call the police after we leave, but we’ll be well out of their jurisdiction when they get here. We’ll get away.”

  Cassandra went to the office and waited for the motel guy to get there. Armstrong, Wrenn and Foote went to Bones’s body, and carried him into the SUV. Armstrong was quite distraught as he said his final goodbyes to his lifelong companion.

  Cassandra came out twenty minutes later with a smile on her face. “It’s all taken care of, fellas. He was pissed at first, but ten grand in the suitcase persuaded him to accept the story, and he promised he’d wait a couple hours before calling the police.”

  Armstrong called for everyone to pack up and meet in the center of the parking lot. Ten minutes later, Armstrong addressed the group. “Well, our job is done. Pamela, you are about the bravest lady I have ever known. I turn over your troupe to you and we’ll go back to our business.”

  Then Foote spoke up. “Me and Wrenn are going with them, Chad. In lieu of the money, we’ll tag along with Ray and Cassandra, provide extra security, and go to New America.”

  “Why don’t you come with us?” Wrenn said. “We could really use you.”

  “Yeah, come with us, Chad,” Foote said. “If that’s all right with Pamela.”

  Pamela smiled. “The more the merrier.”

  Chad wore a smirk. “Christ, man. What am I going to do without you guys? I lost Bones, and now you two as well. I got to admit one thing. I sure would like to know what’s on the other side of that border. Virtually no one goes in, no one comes out, and there’s almost a total blackout. Christ, you’d think it’s North Korea.”

  “Some people call it heaven,” Ray said.

  “I have a home there,” Pamela said. “It is like an escape from hell. Let’s all go there together. This time I’m staying over there.”

  “Shit,” Chad said, smiling. “Fine! We’ll be the newest pilgrims.”

  Then Wrenn yelled, “On to the New World.”

  Then everyone else chimed in. “On to the New World,” cheering.

  Part 3:

  To The New World

  Chapter 21:

  Kidnapped

  The group drove about a hundred more miles into northern South Dakota—neutral territory. Armstrong found a spot on the side of the road, in a wooded area near a mile marker. He buried Bones there, and carefully stepped off the distance from the mile marker. After the burial, everyone gathered around his grave while Chad gave the eulogy.

  “Today, April 12th, I say good-bye to my friend, Robert Shipley. I called him Bones because at 6-1 and all of 160 pounds he looked like he was all skin and bones. I think, if given a choice, he would have wanted to come with us. My wish is to bury him in the New World, but it’s uncertain how long it will take us to get there. Bones was more than a good soldier, he was my friend. He had all the skills one could want: smart, fearless, and strong. I will sorely miss him. I consider this innocuous place to be only a temporary resting spot. I’m going to come back for you, buddy. I don’t know when, and it may be a long time, but I’ll never forget to come back for you. We’ll give you a proper funeral and burial in the New World. After all, you died to make this happen for the rest of us. God bless you, my man. Rest in peace old faithful friend. Rest in peace.”

  The new pilgrims pulled into a motel and grabbed five rooms. Eugene went to Pamela’s room and found Sandy there. “Oh, is this a bad time?”

  “No, Gene, it’s all right,” Pamela said.

  “So, I’m Gene again?”

  “Oh, that’s right.”

  “What’s going on?” Sandy said.

  “I called him Phillip. That was what outsiders know him as. I couldn’t be sure at first, so I told you his name was Phillip.”

  “But it’s Eugene, or just Gene,” he said.

  It was a good opportunity for Eugene to get to know Sandy, of whom he remembered Fernando speaking so fondly. Sandy had no groceries, and Armstrong didn’t think it safe for anyone to be off on their own. Eugene found an old restaurant menu in his room that delivered and invited Sandy and Pamela over for pizza.

  “You two go. I have something here,” Pamela said.

  Sandy smiled an
d told Gene she’d come.

  “Tell me about Fernando. You didn’t get a chance to answer when I asked you that before because the Hogs showed up. He was in many of my dreams. I think I truly loved him.”

  Eugene relayed to Sandra everything he remembered from that time in Joliet, and then his experience in Hell House.

  Sandy just looked at him curiously. “So, why did they put you in there?”

  He then told her the story of his life up to Catherine’s death. Sandy listened sympathetically. They drank much of the last of the wine. Finally, Eugene just said, “I had a good life where I was. I had a well-paying job and a terrific wife, whom I miss very much.”

  “Tell me about her, Gene.”

  “She was quite beautiful and smart. She taught high school—mostly history and literature—but she could teach math below calculus in a pinch. Then she began drinking heavily. She’d be forgetful, and was always going out a lot. I learned that she was forced into an affair with…Jaydan Casimir, your husband. It was before he met you. When Catherine couldn’t handle it anymore, she killed herself on drugs and booze.”

  “Oh my God, Gene. What did you do?”

  “No sooner than she died I found myself fighting for my own freedom. That’s when they stuck me in Joliet. It was after Catherine died that Casimir came after you. He came after me too. He thought I’d go radical on him, blame him for Catherine’s death, so they stuck me in Hell House. It turns out that Dennis, Ray’s brother, was just using me. He’s the one who brought me there. I thought he was my friend.” Eugene looked downcast at this point.

  “My husband is such a bastard. They say he’s the second most powerful man in the country after this guy named Martinez.”

  “Imagine that. It used to be the President.”

  “How did this ever happen in the first place?”

  Eugene just shrugged. There was a knock at the door.

  “It must be the pizza man,” Gene said. He looked out the spy hole and then opened the door.

  Sandy smiled and ran to the door, and then shrieked. Eugene looked at Sandy, and then at the stunned pizza guy.