In Her Sights (The Thousand Words Series Book 2)

by Brooks, Tori

  “Cassie?” Kenny guessed.

  Jess paused, then nodded. “I still mostly avoid her when she’s home. Except, when she’s not looking, I sneak up on her, in the shadows and try to talk to her. Startle her, you know?”

  Kenny nodded.

  “But I can’t do it. I just walk off. She never knows I was even there.”

  “Testing yourself?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Dude, you need to get help. Real help. Talking to me doesn’t count.”

  Jess looked away. “I did.”

  “What?” Kenny asked. Jess heard his interest piqued and cringed.

  “I talked to Flynn. That shrink Paul hired for Dev? The one Flynn blackmailed him into going to?”

  “Yeah?”

  “I got her name and number from Flynn, Dr. Braithewait. She’s in Boston now. She teaches at Harvard and has a practice on the side. Only a few clients, she’s picky. Since she has Dev already, I talked her into picking me up. You know, my problem is Dev’s sister, I work with Dev, it’s all related. Fill in the big picture and all that.”

  “Makes sense as a sales pitch.”

  “The problem is, she didn’t tell me anything I didn’t know. She even told me that I knew she was going to tell me I already knew what my problem was, and how to fix it. I just wasn’t willing to do it. She said I needed to go through the motions to hear it officially, and now I had. Now I had a choice, either she could nag me, or I could ignore her.” Jess shrugged. “I chose ignore her and came home.”

  Kenny sighed and slumped back in his chair. “So you still physically can’t speak to Cassie?”

  “No.”

  “And you’re refusing the help of a well-respected psychologist?”

  Jess shrugged and nodded.

  “You’re an idiot,” Kenny said with a defeated shake of his head. And returned his attention to the papers on his desk.

  “Yeah. Now, onto other problems: Dev’s writing revenge rock.”

  “Huh?” Kenny looked up again. “Oh, yeah, I noticed.”

  “What’s up with that?” Jess asked.

  “I’m not sure. He says nothing. Bryan said don’t bug him about it then punctuated it by glaring and repeating it twice. Apparently we are not to ask Dev about it. He’ll be back next week.”

  “So something’s up.”

  “And Bryan’s handling it.” Kenny nodded, apparently willing to let Bryan handle it.

  “I know you’re thinking what I’m thinking,” Jess smiled, envisioning the loss of Dev’s pain-in-the-ass girlfriend.

  “I am,” Kenny agreed. “But we’re not talking to Dev about it.”

  “Fair enough.” Jess nodded. “Is that all we know?”

  “For now. I came home from Chicago early with the thoughts that Dev might return early as well. You know, try to talk to the source of all our woes? He’s skipping graduation; that means something. I want to be here when he gets back.

  “But not a word to him about it,” Kenny told Jess again, and returned to his book.

  Jess paused for a moment before nodding, then went back upstairs. Gunter was playing with crayons at the kitchen table as Jess walked by. He hesitated to call it coloring yet, but the kid was only two and at least matched colors reasonably well. His creations weren’t an eyesore. Now it was just a matter of those inconvenient lines. Jess gave Gunter a thumbs-up and tussled his baby-fine hair. Gunter laughed as Jess walked out the back door.

  Instead of going to his apartment over the garage, Jess got into his Jaguar. Maybe he should really move out, he thought. It was just being here was his tie to Cassie. Being able to sit down with Sophie and watch a movie after she got off a call with her big sister let him stay connected to Cassie. With Bryan filling in specifics from what he got from his wife when he asked, Jess could stay caught up with what Cassie was doing.

  So no to moving out, Jess decided as he drove through the residential area and slowed. He wasn’t familiar with these streets and checked the address in his phone again as he put Cassie on the back burner in his mind. Jess loved dwelling on her in his spare time, but at the moment he had to deal with her troublesome little brother.

  Finding the house he was looking for, he pulled up front just as a little bright blue compact pulled into the driveway and screeched to a halt. Jess casually got out of the car, a smile already on his face. He knew who that had to be. He walked around to the front of his Jag and sat on the hood to wait.

  Lindsay got out of the tiny car, blond hair framing her face and blowing gently in the warm breeze. She was fuming at his being here, her blue eyes caught the sun and sparkled and her lips were set in a determined way. She even had her little fists balled up, it was cute. Actually, if she’d been anyone else, Jess thought, she’d be absolutely gorgeous. But she was Lindsay. Pity.

  “What are you doing here?” she demanded.

  “Looking for you actually,” Jess answered. He looked over her tiny blue car. “Interesting. Where’s the Ferrari?”

  Lindsay had started to walk around the car toward him but stopped at his question, leaving her by the back bumper. She looked at her car, then at Jess. “What do you mean?”

  Jess considered her for a moment, she seemed genuinely confused by the question. If Dev lent her his Ferrari, and she didn’t have it, and wasn’t supposed to have it, what did that mean? Dev could have replaced it, but not with this little generic compact thing.

  So Lindsay didn’t have Dev’s car and he was writing revenge lyrics. Jess smiled, Christmas came early.

  “So what happened? He catch you cheating on him?” Jess decided to take a guess.

  Lindsay blushed. “Other way around. Erika Atlas happened. I found out. Dev didn’t tell you? Surprising. Actually, maybe not. He’s probably embarrassed.”

  Jess had to look away to hide his astonishment. The little bitch actually thought Dev was sleeping with Erika? Dev? Like he was capable of an affair. Erika would have to thaw him first.

  Of course Erika would happily thaw him out and climb on board. Jess doubted Dev had caught on to Erika’s interest. In his mind, they were associates. Maybe friends, although that would be a stretch. Erika hadn’t reached the level of desperation required for her to sit him down and spell it out yet. Although clearly Lindsay figured out Erika’s long game.

  He looked back at Lindsay fidgeting by her car. She pushed her hair out of her face and bit her bottom lip, to stop herself from crying it looked like. Jess hated it when they cried, it made them all soft and vulnerable and it brought something out in him that made him want to fix things. But she wasn’t crying yet, and he hated Lindsay. Thanks to her, Bryan’s wife kneed him and – Jess didn’t want to think about that. Lindsay was the enemy. She was a dividing factor in the band, they needed her gone.

  But Dev was innocent and Jess knew it. Fine, he’d throw the kid a bone. A small one.

  “Lindsay, you know I hate you, right?”

  Lindsay gave him a look of pure loathing. “Yeah, Jess, I think I’ve figured that one out.”

  “Good. Now that we have that out in the open, how long have you and Dev been together?”

  “We’re not together anymore.”

  “Right. Point to me. Yay.” Jess waved his hands in the air in the imitation of a small celebration. “How long were you together?” Jess grinned, returning his hands to his hips.

  Lindsay hesitated. “Just over four years. Why?”

  “Right. So you’ve known him for four years. Of course I’ve known him for eight. Then again, I’ve never fucked him. Does that make a difference? I’ve given him advice. On you no less. How to keep you, can you believe that? That was a long time ago. Maybe he should have kept coming to me. Whoever he’s asking now clearly isn’t cutting it.”

  “Your point?” Lindsay asked, glaring at him.

  Jess shot the look back at her, his playful smile fading as he held her eyes with his own. “The point is, sweetheart, four years is long enough and you should know better.” He pointed at he
r, then let the hand fall.

  He turned away. “I don’t like you, I never have. I’d love for you to realize your mistake then have Dev to come to his senses for a change and refuse to take you back. He won’t, but I’d love it if he did.

  “Dev’s a friend, but I wasn’t invited to this party so that’s all the help I’m going to give you.” Jess got in his car and left before Lindsay could cry and make him change his mind.

  ○ ○ ○

  Lindsay watched Jess drive off and stomped inside. Becky said something from the dining room, but she didn’t catch it and ignored her sister on her way to her room. She slammed the door out of habit, didn’t like the effect, opened it again, and slammed it harder.

  Becky opened the door again almost immediately. “I get it you’re upset, but don’t take it out on the infrastructure.”

  “Get out.”

  “Talk to me.”

  “Did you see –”

  “The billboards or the banner ads?” Becky asked.

  “Ads? Plural? I only saw the one when I went to check my email.”

  “I’d stay off your computer then.”

  “He can’t have littered the entire Internet with them,” Lindsay sighed, sitting at her desk.

  “Only everywhere you go. Nice rock. I’m going to assume you’ve seen it by now.”

  “Hard to avoid.”

  “I asked him – just couldn’t help it – and yes, it really is ever-so-slightly pink. It only shows in certain light. It was a custom job. He sat at Tiffany’s for what he said felt like forever, he even said it that way –forever –coming up with the design with their specialist. Didn’t volunteer how much it cost and I didn’t have the nerve to ask. I think I’d be afraid to know.” Becky sat on her bed, but Lindsay really just wanted her to go.

  “Jess came by. He didn’t know,” Lindsay said.

  “About the proposals all over town or that you gave his little friend the heave-ho?”

  “Either.”

  “Wow. Bryan knows but Jess doesn’t? I’ll venture Kenny doesn’t either then. I suppose that makes sense. Dev obviously wants to fix it and wouldn’t want to deal with their questions.”

  “He knows now,” Lindsay said, fishing her phone out of her purse.

  Becky didn’t say anything and Lindsay looked up, phone in hand to see what silenced her sister.

  “What?” Lindsay asked.

  “Are you sure this is really what you want?” Becky asked softly. “Dev’s a good guy. He –”

  “I’ve thought about it, Becky. Did I want this? No. Is it fair? No. Do I have doubts? Yes. But even if I turned around and said ‘never mind, let’s put it all behind us’ I’d still have doubts. Either way I’m screwed. We’re screwed.”

  “Dad will miss him,” Becky said, standing up and walking to the door.

  “Dad can keep him. He can still be Dev’s lawyer, I won’t get in the way.”

  “It doesn’t work like that.”

  “Dad wants a son, Dev wants a father. They’ll figure it out.” Lindsay turned her back on her sister as she left, staring at the phone in her hand instead. She should really do this in person. But she could barely hold it together for Jess. Facing Dev would be her undoing. Still, if it helped him to let go ...

  Not bothering to change or fix her hair or makeup, Lindsay rang Bryan’s doorbell a half-hour later. Brenda answered, her face pale as she quickly stepped out on the porch and pulled the door closed behind her.

  “Lindsay? What on earth?”

  “Have you seen what Dev’s doing?” Lindsay asked. Brenda shook her head. “Billboards all over with pictures of an engagement ring. Banner ads on sites I go to. It’s got to stop.”

  “Billboards?” Brenda squeaked.

  “He didn’t put his name on them, relax,” Lindsay reassured her.

  “I take it you’re not here to humor him.”

  “No, and Becky’s already given me a last-ditch reaming for it too, so just don’t. I’m thinking maybe if we just sat down, face to face ...”

  “That’s not going to make it easier,” Brenda shook her head.

  “No,” Lindsay dropped her eyes, preferring her sandals to the pain in Brenda’s face. She wasn’t just hurting Dev, a lot of people loved him and felt his pain. At least Jess’s unexpected arrival earlier answered the question as to why Flynn hadn’t shown up at her door yet.

  Brenda sighed. “All right. Come on in. I’ll grab Bryan and we’ll be out back getting a little gardening done.”

  Lindsay smiled gratefully at Brenda, knowing the effort was weak, but unable to offer anything more. Brenda led her back inside and Lindsay braced herself to confront Dev. He wasn’t in the living room, but Bryan was. He stared at Lindsay and gaped. Brenda shushed him almost immediately.

  “Get your shoes on, we’re going to go out back and garden,” she told him.

  “I weeded yesterday. There isn’t anything –”

  “We’ll find something to do.”

  “Right.” Bryan retreated to the kitchen and a minute later, the back door opened and closed. Brenda put a fresh box of tissues on the end table and took two cans of Coke from the refrigerator. She set them on the coffee table.

  “Are you ready for this?” Brenda asked.

  Lindsay wasn’t, but she didn’t have a choice. She nodded.

  “Dev!” Brenda called. “Lindsay’s here for you.”

  They both looked down the hall expectantly.

  “Just a minute,” Dev called back.

  “Thought that might get his attention,” Brenda said. “Well, I’m off. We’re just out back if you need us. Or Dev does after. Good luck and ... go easy on him. He loves you.” Brenda took Lindsay’s hand in her own and gave it a squeeze.

  Lindsay nodded. “Thanks. I wish I didn’t have to do this.”

  “Me too,” Brenda said. She turned and walked out through the kitchen, leaving Lindsay alone to face her ex.

  Dev wasn’t long. As soon as the back door closed, Dev appeared in the hallway.

  “Lin? I didn’t expect you. I mean, I’m glad you came, it’s just ...” Dev faltered.

  “You wanted to get my attention, I assume.” She nodded in understanding. “That billboard by the parking lot caused an accident, by the way.”

  The color drained from Dev’s face.

  “It wasn’t serious, just a couple of overpriced bumpers need to be replaced.” She hurried to alleviate his concern. Lindsay walked over to the couch and sat down.

  “I didn’t think about that,” he admitted. Dev’s eyes darted from Lindsay huddled at the far end of the couch to the two unopened cans of Coke on the table, and the new box of tissues on the end table closest to him. He was putting the pieces together.

  “People were talking at school,” Lindsay said, not sure how to begin now that she was here. “Some figured out Puggy was Pugmire the Purple and that sparked a whole new line of questions on how a hacker could afford a ring like that.”

  “Really?” Dev asked, taking a seat on the couch beside her. Lindsay noticed he didn’t sit as close as he used to.

  Lindsay nodded and told him the theories likening him to an evil villain or millionaire superhero, her anger returning as she did so.

  “I’d have to be more than a millionaire superhero to afford that ring,” Dev said casually. “And most villains wouldn’t put that much thought into personalizing an engagement ring. Did anyone notice it was tinted?”

  Lindsay paused.

  “Did you?” Dev asked softly. “The border diamonds are pale pink so the center one picks up their color. You can only tell in some light, it’s subtle.”

  “I thought it was the picture.”

  “Pink’s your favorite color, Lin. It’s a ring designed specifically with you in mind. Can I show you?”

  “No.”

  “You’re really that determined?” Dev’s eyes held hers. Lindsay used to spend hours thinking of poetic ways to describe Dev’s green eyes after their online video-dates
. Mossy; grassy; earthy; a deeper green than spring, but not as dark as the forest. Any way you cut it, at the moment Dev’s eyes held nothing but crushed hope.

  Lindsay looked away. “Dev, I’m sorry.”

  “Do you still love me?”

  “What?” She looked back to him in surprise.

  “This, what you’re doing is about trust. Setting your lack of trust in me aside, do you still love me?”

  Lindsay’s jaw fell open. That wasn’t fair. Of course what she was doing wasn’t fair. Pulling herself together quickly, and closing her gaping mouth, she nodded and turned away again. “The problem is, you can’t separate trust from the equation.”

  “I did.”

  Lindsay looked at him again, shocked. He didn’t trust her?

  “Maybe it’s more appropriate to say I trust you to behave a certain way. That’s beside the point. I shouldn’t have to ask for the same allowances I grant you because I don’t need them. You think I’m behaving in a way you understand more than in a way I’m likely to. That’s your experience talking, Lindsay, not my pattern of behavior. I think it’s called projection.”

  Lindsey gaped at him. Did he just tell her he knew she’d been cheating? And then implied she was accusing him of the same thing because she felt guilty? She didn’t know what to say to that. Of course she had cheated, but that was beside the point. Lindsay decided to let his other accusation slide simply because she didn’t know what else to do and she was already fighting the impulse to run.

  “I’m not going there,” she said. “I just came by because I thought you deserved to hear this in person.”

  “I’d rather not,” he said. “We had something, and you’re walking away. You already admitted it wasn’t fair, and you’re not willing to listen.” Dev sighed and Lindsay felt like her heart was breaking as well. He shook his head. “I don’t have anything left to fight this with, Lin. I don’t want to let you go. You know that, but I’m out of ideas on how to make you listen, make you believe me.

  “You helped me with a lot of problems I had. Thank you for that,” Dev continued. Lindsay felt a tightness in her throat that would have kept her from answering him even if she could have found the words.