by Nicola May
‘I wanted to discuss Eliska’s maintenance and how we are going to deal with this whole damn situation.’
‘I don’t want your money, Stephen, I said that before.’
‘But maybe now is the time for Eliska to know she has a father.’
‘Even if you despise her mother? I’m not sure how that’s going to work really.’
‘And also I want to shut down all communications as your PR agency.’
‘Hmm, that’s a shocker. So you don’t want to work with me or have anything to do with me, but you’d quite like my daughter to know she has a father. This is all too much for me to take in, Stephen. I really don’t think you’ve thought this through.’
‘Oh, come on, Lani. You’re as hard as nails, you are. If it’s like a business arrangement, you’ll work it out somehow.’
Hormones and emotions suddenly started to slush around her body, and big ploppy tears started to fall slowly down her cheeks.
‘You actually don’t know anything about me, do you, Stephen? The truth is I missed you. I missed you so bloody much, it literally hurt. Every time my phone rang I prayed it was you. I literally counted down the days when you would be back at work. I know I haven’t been the best parent or even the best person in the world, but if you were to just give me a chance...’
Stephen was startled by her reaction.
‘Give you a chance? What are you saying to me, Lani?’
Alana took a deep breath. ‘I think I’m saying that I love you, Stephen.’
‘Love! You wouldn’t know what love was if it bit you in the fucking arse!’ He stood up, furious once more. ‘I shall sort out terminating our contract with you and we shall talk again re. Eliska when things aren’t quite so raw. Goodbye, Alana.’
Feeling a rush of cold air as the door slammed shut, Alana ran to the toilet to be sick.
– Chapter Sixteen –
‘I wish we’d chosen to lose weight in the summer, Joan, it’s bloody Baltic tonight.’ Mo and Joan, head-torches blazing, were marching around the perimeter road of the park.
‘But what do exercise points mean, Mo?’
‘They mean pies, duckie – extra pies.’
Joan laughed. ‘I was thinking more like maybe an extra banana, but OK pies does sound a better option.’
‘I’ve been meaning to ask you how it’s going at home. Now the party is out of the way, has Colin Barrell upped his sexual prowess?’
‘Like a panther now, he is – waits to pounce on me every Friday. It was just a blip. I love my old man, you know that.’
‘I so wish I had what you have. I can’t even remember the last time I had sex with Ron, but to be honest I’d be horrified if he suggested it.’
‘So, you haven’t even done it since he’s been off the booze then?’
‘No, he’s still really agitated and has night sweats and I just don’t fancy him.’
‘Oh, Mo. What are we going to do with you?’
‘I really don’t know. He is being so good with Rosie at the moment. I got home from Weight Busters and he was even reading her a story and being really loving.’
‘Maybe you should just have a passionate affair with Charlie’s dad? You said how good he was in bed.’
‘Imagine! He’s probably married and we are both so fat at the moment it would be like elephants at it – vile. I have trouble getting naked in front of myself let alone anyone else. And anyway, you know I can’t have anything to do with him as I don’t want him to know about Charlie. It would be unfair on him and my boy, and if I got close to him, he would have to know.’
‘Sometimes to find happiness you have to reach out and grab it though, Mo. Life rarely comes to you. You have to find the right path to go down. It just takes some people longer than others, that’s all.’
‘I’ve come across too many dead-ends, that’s my problem,’ puffed Mo.
‘Well, you’re taking a step in the right direction now by exercising. Your skin is looking great now, and when Ffion does your hair you look a million dollars.’
‘Aw, listen to you. I’ll be marrying a Hollywood A-lister yet.’
‘Well, I hear Tom Cruise is on the market again.’
‘Too short,’ Mo snortled.
‘Yeah, and you’ll have to become religious,’ Joan added as they laughed their way to the park gate.
‘Hi, Inga.’ Emily Pritchard came running up to her outside the twins’ classroom. ‘Any chance of babysitting Friday night? Kenneth and I are going out for a meal.’
‘Er…’
‘We will get you home safe as usual.’
‘Let me just check with Gordon as I do not know his flights yet.’ This was a complete lie. Inga, despite the satisfying prospect of playing with Kenny’s huge appendage again, just wasn’t sure if she wanted to carry on having sex with a married man.
Dana power-walked up to the school gates. Mark had really upset her this morning but he had also given her a lot of food for thought. Maybe she had just got tied up in the whole second baby thing. Felt it was what she should do, rather than what she wanted. She nodded to Alana, who gave her a weak smile.
Eliska was such a handful as an only child, Dana thought, but that was probably because her mother was a single working parent. Tommy was such a lovely kid and he did have Sidney, who he was very close to and who quite often holidayed with them.
She realised how much she liked her job and the independence it brought her. It got her out of just being a glorified au-pair and if she was honest she had always hated housework anyway. Maybe she should just do as Mark said and get a cleaner. Do a bit more for herself.
But did she just like her job because of the lovely boys she worked for? She didn’t want to dwell on that thought as it could open up a further issues to do with her marriage.
‘Mummy!’ Tommy flew out of the classroom with Eliska hot on his heels. ‘Can Eliska stay for tea? Please say yes! She’s got a new Mario Carts game on her console – perleease.’
Alana overheard and wandered over. She noticed how tired Dana looked.
‘You OK with that?’ she asked Dana. ‘I’m happy for him to come back to mine instead, if you like. I’m not drinking so can bring him back after dinner.’
Dana smiled. ‘Do you know what, Alana? That would be lovely.’
‘And please let me give you a lift up the hill, you look shattered.’
‘Actually, a lift to the High Street would be great as I’ve got to get a few bits to get,’ Dana said gratefully. Thanks.’
The children excitedly piled into the back of Alana’s Audi.
‘Well done on the not drinking.’
‘It was time I stopped, eh? Look Dana, I’m so sorry for all the times I let you and myself down.’ Hormones to the fore again, she suddenly began to cry. The children were oblivious as they chattered away. Dana was quite taken aback by this rare display of emotion.
‘Hey, we all make mistakes.’
‘And I know I can tell you this as you have been nothing but discreet, but I’ve made another one. I’m pregnant.’
Dana took a deep intake of breath.
‘And I’m sorry, I know how much you want another child, but life goes on in mysterious ways. The most terrible thing is I don’t know who the father is.’
Dana thought back to the conversation she had had with Tony in the café. If she was in the same situation, which she quite easily could have been, she would want the reassurance.
‘OK. I may be completely out of turn and you don’t even have to respond to what I’m going to say, but if Bruno in the café was a contender, I know it’s not his. I work there, you see, and I put two and two together the night you were late coming here and then I overheard a conversation in the café between the brothers which confirmed it was you.’
She couldn’t put her through the pain of knowing Tony had discussed her indiscretion directly with her.
‘Anyway. After a mistake he made before, Bruno without fail uses condoms, so there’s no way
it would be his.’
Alana went completely quiet, until a few moment later, when she asked: ‘Where shall I drop you?’
‘By Fishers is fine, thank you.’
Alana leaned over to the passenger seat and kissed Dana on the cheek.
‘Thank you SO much. You have just helped me make a massive life decision. I’ll have Tommy back by eight-thirty.’
Dana told Tommy to be good and blew him a kiss. Alana wound down the window.
‘And Dana? It will happen for you too. I’m sure of it.’ She sped off up the road.
Dana enjoyed pottering around in Fishers. It was such a wonderful delicatessen and she delighted in treating herself to lots of goodies she didn’t really need. She even went to the chemist and bought herself a new lipstick. She loved having her own money. Mark was working late tonight, so she had until 8.30 p.m. to do exactly as she pleased.
She set off up the hill home. On walking past Rosco’s, she noticed Tony wiping down the tables. He ran to the door and unlocked it.
‘Bella ragazza, what brings you here?’
She kissed him on each cheek.
‘Tommy’s playing with a friend and Mark’s still at work so I’m free to be alone for a while. I was just walking home.’
‘Perfetto. Let me just get my coat and I will walk with you. If that is OK, of course?’
Dana suddenly felt her heart do a little skip.
‘Bet you wish your girlfriend was hot like me.’ Gordon turned up the radio and danced around the kitchen as he made breakfast for the twins.
‘Shut up, Daddy,’ Lola moaned. ‘And when are we going to meet your new boyfriend anyway?’
Miaowwww! Alfie shot into the kitchen. Kat limped behind with a little splint on her front leg.
‘Bless little Katty baby.’ Gordon swept the moggy gently into his arms.
‘See what happens, Daddy?’ Lily said solemnly. ‘We go away for one night and the kitten gets hurt. What happened to her anyway?’
‘Oh, I don’t know. You know what these two are like, they are always fighting.’
Inga appeared in the doorway half asleep.
‘Sorry I eez late up. I have head-ache. But will of course do the school run.’
‘It’s fine, darling, I’m off today so I will take the terrible two. Here, have some breakfast.’ He’d filled the toast rack with a selection of muffins & granary bread.
‘I was going to ask you, are you OK to babysit on Friday night?’
Inga sighed with relief. ‘Yes, yes of course. I won’t have to babysit Joshua then.’
‘Ooh, Daddy’s got a new boyfriend,’ Lily mocked. ‘So, will we get to meet him Friday then?’
‘Maybe. Now get on with your breakfast.’
Inga went to the sink to refill the kettle.
‘Just a one-off then, you and Kenny boy?’ Gordon asked quietly.
‘I think it has to be. He has a huge cock but then again he is a huge cock – but you can’t have it all, I suppose.’
Gordon laughed. ‘What are you like?’
‘And also what it is you say? You shouldn’t take a poo on your own front step or something like that? I need the babysitting money and can you imagine the scandal? Nobody would employ me if the word got out!’
‘Well, luckily that will never happen. Kenny boy is hardly going to announce it and if you keep working hard, then I promise I won’t either.’
She swiped him with a tea towel as the girls started fighting.
‘Right, that’s it. To your room go and get ready for school, NOW!’
The girls stomped off.
‘How’s it going with Robbie anyway?’
‘He’s not a keeper but by God I’m going to enjoy his young bod for now.’
‘Good, you bloody deserve some fun. Right, let me stuff a muffin in and I can get moving.’
‘Another one dear.’ They both laughed.
‘Oh, God, there he is.’ Mo tried to hide her ample frame behind Joan. ‘Shit, we are going to be next to him in the queue.’
‘Ssh. It’s fine. Let me just stay in front of you.’
Smashing Sally was in startling form.
‘Ooh Charlie, look at you. I can tell you’ve been a good boy this week.’
Mo nearly fainted when she heard his cockney twang. Last time she heard that, he was telling her how fit she was behind the potting shed at the care home.
‘Well, you did say that sex burned 180 calories every half hour, and that has helped.’
‘You saucy boy, you.’ Smashing Sally giggled like a schoolgirl.
‘My fiancée of course is delighted.’
‘See, see?’ hissed Mo. ‘I told you he’d be with someone.’
‘Mo, we are forty-something, not bloody teenagers; there was always a high chance of that.’
‘I know – and I also know that’s a good thing. I cannot even be tempted now.’
It was Mo’s turn; she took off her shoes, socks, jacket, cardigan and necklace and stood on the scales.
‘You have a weight loss of 4lbs! Wow, that’s smashing Mo, smashing. Well done you.’
‘Get in!’ Mo shouted far too loudly as she ran to sit down next to Joan, who had also lost a fantastic 5lbs in her first week.
The friends were so engrossed in talk about how much they were going to lose this week that they didn’t notice their neighbour until he spoke – causing Mo to nearly jump out of her skin.
‘Maureen bloody Stubbings. Well I never! Fancy seeing you ’ere after all these years. I mean, what must it be… at least twenty?’
Mo had lost the inability to speak and let out a slight squeak.
‘I’d like to say we ’aven’t changed a bit but we wouldn’t be ’ere if we ‘adn’t, eh?’ He laughed his big happy laugh. ‘You’ve still got that twinkle, gel, I’ll give you that.’
Mo blushed to her roots. ‘Charlie Lake. Still holding court with a room full of ladies, I see.’ She beamed and kissed him on the cheek. ‘It’s good to see you. This is my good friend and neighbour, Joan. We are fighting our bread and wine addiction – the foods of Satan, according to Sally.’
Charlie chuckled and shook Joan’s hand. ‘Pleased to meet you.’ Then: ‘So are both you lovely ladies married then?’
They held out their left hands in unison.
‘Kids?’
Mo shuffled in her seat.
‘I’ve got four and Mo has two,’ Joan intervened swiftly. ‘You?’
‘I’m on my third marriage. Well I say third, I’m getting married to Penny in June to make it number three. So I’ve got four months to shift this lot.’ He squeezed his fat tummy. ‘She’s twenty years younger, so I’d best do as I’m told I guess, and as for kids, I’ve got none that I know of.’ He winked at Mo, who squirmed again. Surely he couldn’t have heard about Charlie junior? She was just being paranoid.
‘I had no idea you lived in this area,’ Mo piped up.
‘Well, why would you?’ Charlie said nonchalantly. ‘I’ve just moved down south. Was in Liverpool for a good while. Met Penny on holiday in Corfu and this is where life has taken me. I’ve lain my hat in a few places but I like it round ’ere. Green and serene. The haves and the have lots.’ He laughed again.
‘Right, I’m not staying for the boring talk,’ he said then. ‘I’m off to the pub, me. Penny thinks I’m here till nine so that gives me a couple of hours’ grace.’
‘What are you like?’ Mo smiled.
‘Same as I ever was.’ He winked at her again and she felt a feeling she hadn’t felt for quite some time. ‘Fancy joining me, ladies?’
‘You’re all right, Charlie,’ Mo replied.
‘And make sure you mix it with a slimline,’ Joan added.
And then he was gone.
– Chapter Seventeen –
Dana shivered. Tony took off his scarf and wrapped it gently around her neck. ‘Mi tesoro, keep yourself warm. It is very cold today.’
They started walking up the big hill towards her house.
‘It would be wrong if anyone saw us together.’ Dana breathed out cold air into the darkness. ‘And I can’t invite you in.’
‘It is dark, my lovely. No one can see us and we are just work colleagues, that is all.’
‘Somehow I don’t think Mark would see it like that. He has always been incredibly jealous.’
‘Then we shall definitely make sure you don’t get in trouble.’ He herded her through the park gates to their left.
Dana giggled. ‘You make me feel twenty-five again, Tony
Rosco.’
‘But you are twenty-five, silly.’
‘I know. I know. But being with an older man makes you act older, do older things. I mean, I can’t remember the last time I went out and really let my hair down.’
‘Your husband, he is not that old.’
‘I know, I guess you just get into a rut.’
‘Well if you were mine I would make sure you were happy all the time and our hair would be forever let down.’ He shook out his pony tail and kissed her gently on the forehead.
‘Here, let’s go on the swings.’ Tony took her hand and began to drag her across the park.
‘I can’t see a thing,’ Dana screeched.
“It’s fine. I have a torch in my bag.’
He held a swing still for Dana to get on and sat on the one next to her.
‘And I also have a little warmer for us both.’ He handed her a miniature of Amaretto. ‘This is the drink of love in my eyes.’
‘Well, don’t look at me with Amaretto in your eyes, I am a happily married woman.’
‘Are you really, Dana?’
Dana loved the way he said her name. Not Dar-nar, the way it should be pronounced but Danna.
‘I thought I was – until this morning that was actually.’ She took a slurp and started to swing slowly. ‘I’m not sure what I want any more. Don’t get me wrong – I lead a blessed life. I have a beautiful son, a kind husband and lovely house, and I don’t have to work if I don’t want to. I have been yearning for a baby because I have struggled to have one, but now I’m not sure if that is what I am really yearning for at all.
‘My life hasn’t panned out as I wanted it to,’ she went on. ‘I never really achieved my dreams as Tommy came along when I was just so young.’
