by Nicola May
Joan and Ffion looked on at how caring he was being and a little piece of each of their hearts melted.
When Charlie got outside, he suddenly cracked up. He knew that Joan was travelling back with his mum and Rosie, so he gave her a kiss and said he would see her at the pub where the wake was being held, once he had pulled himself together.
However, once out of their sight, he walked out of the church gates and straight into a pub immediately opposite the church to get a badly needed drink.
‘A large JD and Coke, please, mate.’
‘And I’ll have the same,’ a young Welsh accent trilled behind him, whilst handing a twenty-pound note over the bar.
‘Ffion! What are you doing here?’
‘I was at the back of the church showing support to your mum. I’m so sorry, darling.’
Charlie downed his drink in one. ‘Shove another one in there, please, mate.’ He wiped his eyes and moved over to sit at a table in the corner.
Ffion joined him. ‘You were so brave. I can’t imagine losing either of my parents.’
‘I know my dad was a bastard at the end but we made our peace.’ He bit his lip to stop further tears. ‘And we had such a happy house when we were little. Oh, Ffi. This is so shit and poor Mum, she’s got no bloody money. I’m going to help her now and stop being such a bastard myself. And I did love him, deep down. I really did.’
‘That is just so lovely, considering he wasn’t even your real dad.’
Charlie felt as if he had just been shot in the heart.
‘What did you just say?’
‘Yeah, your mum told me that she was pregnant when she met your dad.’
Charlie wished he had been shot in the heart.
‘I guess I was lucky we all made it work then, eh? Right, let’s get to that wake. I mean, what would my dad think, me not drinking to his health?’
‘Mother! Mother! Where are you?’ Alana threw her keys on the side. The TV was on and the kettle had just boiled.
She could hear loud screeching in the garden. She went to the conservatory and there was her sixty-seven-year-old mother and her six-year-old daughter running though the sprinkler which was in full flow. She laughed out loud, keeping in the shadows so she could watch with joy for longer.
That was another thing: how could she take Eliska away from her granny now that they had just met and were getting on so well? Her daughter had never been happier – and was it her right to pull her away from all that she found familiar to start up a new life with Stephen?
She walked outside and the naughty twosome stopped still as if to prove they had been doing nothing, although the fact they were soaked to their pants somewhat gave the game away.
‘I don’t know what you’re stopping for,’ Alana said, turning up the hose on the side of the house so that she could join in the fun.
She hadn’t had such a laugh in years. In fact, she had forgotten what real happiness felt like, until lately.
‘Thank you,’ Alana said to her mother as they sat in dressing-gowns having a cup of tea at the kitchen table later. Eliska was up having a bath.
‘For what, dear?’
‘For coming back and loving us.’
‘Not exactly difficult to do, Lani,’ Isobel Murray replied in her usual no-nonsense manner. ‘Now I really must get bathed if the bairn has finished. I mean, look at the state of my hair!’
‘Have you got a sec before you go up, Mother?’
‘Sure, my darling. What’s the matter?’
‘It’s a dilemma, but shouldn’t be a dilemma.’
‘Go on, spit it out, girl.’
‘Stephen has asked if I will move to Cyprus with him – I mean me and Rosie, of course.’
‘And will you have to work?’
‘No. He’s semi-retiring and says I can help with his business over there, or if I want to find something for myself, of course.’
‘Good God, girl, book the tickets now. What the deuces are you waiting for?’
‘I’m worried about Eliska, uprooting her and also leaving you now that we are all getting on so well.’
‘Look, let’s break it down. The schools will have a lot of ex-pat kids. It is a holiday resort so there will be lots of English speakers to make friends with. And I’ve always thought that living in new countries rounds you as a person.’
‘Stephen said all of that and his wife’s sister lives there with her kids, so she can help me with schools, I guess.’
‘See? And I can manage the house here, if you like. Or even better, darling, you know that wherever I lay my hat is my home. I could even get a little villa in the sun near you to help babysit.’
‘Stephen’s business actually is villa rental.’
‘Well, there you go! What’s not to be excited about, I say.’
‘And what about my job?’
‘You were saying yourself how much you liked not working, the month you had off. Go, Lani – have some fun with a decent man who loves you. You’ve worked hard. You deserve it. And you mark my words, that little one will love it and love you for it when she’s older, I promise you.’
‘Oh, I don’t know.’
‘What’s really your concern, Lani?’
‘I think I’m a bit scared.’
‘Of what in particular?’
‘Of not being in control, of being cared for. Of Stephen never loving me as much as his wife. It all just seems a bit too much. I don’t think I can do it.’
‘Oh, love. You mustn’t throw away this chance of happiness because of your stubborn, single-minded nature. You can always come back if it’s not for you, but do you know what?
You don’t find many Stephen McNairs in this life, and if I were you, I would grab him with both hands and not let him go.’
– Chapter Twenty Five –
Ron Collins’ wake was over in an hour. Mo didn’t want it to be a boozy affair, considering that was what in effect had destroyed her marriage and killed her husband.
Charlie had told Ffion to her dismay that he didn’t want her to go with him and that in his eyes they were over for good. Well, sod him; he was a nasty piece of work anyway so why would she want him in her life? She let him go and went back to the bar to have one for the road.
‘Penny for ‘em?’
‘What?’ Ffion said to the rotund dark-haired man at the bar.
‘I said “a penny for ’em” – your thoughts, that is.’
‘Oh, sorry – I was miles away. I’ve just been to a funeral and my sort of ex has just been an arse. Didn’t I see you in the back of the church?’
‘Nah, it must have been someone who just looked like me. Let me get this for you – can’t see a pretty girl like you in distress. I’m Charlie, by the way.’
‘Not another one – that’s his name.’
‘Oh dear. So why’s this young Charlie being an arse then?’
‘I don’t know really. I just mentioned that he was coping so well, considering it wasn’t even his real dad, and he went all narked on me.’
‘He’s probably feeling very emotional and doesn’t know how to get it out, like most lads.’
‘It is a really sad but also romantic story, actually. His mum met someone whilst she was in care and felt he couldn’t provide for her and a baby. She really loved him too.’
‘Yeah, that is a sad tale. You give the lad a break, pet. He’ll be fine once today is over, I bet you.’
With that Charlie Lake went out to the smoking area lit a cigarette and grinned broadly.
When Dana picked Mark up from the train station, he seemed tired and agitated.
‘Nice day doing nothing in the sunshine?’ was his opening gambit.
‘Well, it was your choice to stop me working.’
‘Don’t even go there when I’m in this bad a mood. Where’s the boy anyway?’
‘He’s at Eliska’s.’
‘So you can’t even look after your son when you’re not working?’
They pulled onto th
eir drive.
‘Mark, what is wrong with you?’
‘Let’s just get in. I’ve had a bad day, that’s all.’
She handed him a beer from the fridge.
‘Thanks.’
Dana poured herself a Diet Coke and sat at the kitchen table. ‘I’ve got something to tell you.’
‘Go on, but be quick as I’ve got a conference call with the US at seven-thirty.’
‘I’m pregnant. The baby is due on Valentine’s Day too. See? All that sexy lovemaking did pay off.’
Mark went to the kitchen calendar and started flicking through the pages. He came back to her calmly.
‘So, you did sleep with him then?’
Dana squirmed on her seat. OK, so she had to deny it. She and Tony had used condoms every time. There was no way it could be his.
‘So did you?’ Mark shouted at the top of his voice.
‘No. No, I didn’t. It’s your baby, Mark. I promise it is.’
‘Dana Knight. I have loved you for so many years with all my heart. Please be honest with me – I have to know. You owe me that at least.’
She started to cry. ‘The baby is yours.’
‘Now, I am no doctor but I have lived with you for the past two years as a baby – maker and that is all. On this fucking calendar, every four weeks we have five O’s for ovulation and five P’s for period days. I know everything about your lying cheating sexual organs! So don’t you now be saying this is my baby because I know it is that dirty Italian’s. And don’t think you can get out of it by saying we slept together during your ovulation period, because I know that I was so damn angry with you, I didn’t touch you for at least a week.’
‘It is your baby.’ Dana repeated.
‘And I guess this isn’t your voice either then?’ He fiddled around with his phone until a recording of Tony and Dana could be heard quite obviously discussing the fact they had kissed in the back room of Rosco’s.
‘You’ve been spying on me!’
‘Well, not me personally – I paid someone to do it. I knew you were up to something, you conniving little cow. No wonder I didn’t want you to work.’
‘And maybe if you hadn’t have been so controlling, I wouldn’t have done it.’
‘Done what, Dana, a little kiss? No, you fucking shagged him that night I came to the café. I am not as stupid as you think I am. Brother Bruno and his cover story! As if I believed a second of it! I just thought I’d give us a little time. Make a baby together, us two – and be happy again. But no, you’ve spoiled it all. By going behind my back with a young boy who probably doesn’t care an ounce for you and just wanted the sexual buzz of fucking a married woman.’
‘No, it wasn’t like that, he really likes me. And I like him too. But not enough to leave our marriage, Mark. I have so much with you and I couldn’t upset Tommy or leave this beautiful house.’
‘But do you know what, Dana? You are going to have to, because in that little soliloquy you didn’t say that you loved me, and for you to do be able to do that so freely with another man, I don’t think you can.’ He smashed his beer bottle down on to the draining board. ‘You profess to not liking the spoils of my job and all that it brings, but you’re lying about that too. Go back to being an au-pair earning a pittance a week. Me and my boy will be just fine.’
‘As if you’d get custody,’ Dana jeered, but inside she was trembling.
‘I’ve already looked into it.’
‘Who’s lying now?’
‘Go to Lover Boy, tell him you’re having his child. You’ll see how much he likes you then.’
With that, Mark stormed upstairs with his laptop leaving Dana to go to the calendar and pray that he had got the dates wrong.
Mo had literally just said goodbye to Joan at the gate when Charlie arrived. Rosie had gone upstairs to change out of her smart funeral clothes. He looked ashen.
‘I’m so glad you’re home, son. I have something really important to tell you and I don’t think you’re going to like it.’
‘What – she rung ahead, has she?’
‘Sorry, I don’t you know what you mean.’
‘Ffion has rung ahead and told you that I know?’
Mo suddenly felt as if her already breaking world was now completely collapsing. She had been in such a bad place when she had told the young girl all those months ago, and since then she had completely forgotten about it.
‘Oh Charlie, love. No, she hasn’t rung ahead and no, I shouldn’t have confided in her.’
‘No, Mum, you should have fucking told me. You know – your son – the one this is all about. I’m just finding it so hard to even get my head a little bit around it all. The fact that the man who I have called “Dad” for my whole life, is not my real father. I mean, how does anyone ever take that in? It’s just like being told I’m adopted. And every other fucker knew about it but me!’ He punched an angry fist into the palm of his other hand.
‘Only one other person in the world knows, I promise you.’
‘Who’s that?’
‘Joan – and she would never tell anyone. She is the most honest and loyal person I know.’
‘Sometimes, Mother, I think you should really worry about who you trust.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Oh, it doesn’t matter. So, the million-dollar question, do you know who my dad is then?’
‘Of course I do!’ Mo was near to tears.
‘And does he know about me?’
‘Now, Charlie, I am going to be really honest with you. He doesn’t know about you, but he was at a Weight Busters meeting that me and Joan went to recently and has been trying to find out if he is your father. Hang on. Wait here.’
She ran upstairs to get the letter from Ron. ‘You must read this.’
Charlie digested every word slowly and carefully. Mo started to cry.
‘My God. What a pair, my parents. Poor Dad and poor you, having to both hold that secret for so long.’ Charlie went over to her, gave Mo a massive hug and started to cry too.
‘I didn’t want to hurt him or you, and he didn’t want to hurt any of us,’ Mo spluttered.
‘I don’t want to meet him – my real dad, that is. I don’t want to know anything about him. My dad in my eyes, although far from perfect, was Ron Collins. I may change my mind when I get older, who knows. But please can you tell Joan and Ffion to keep their mouths shut in future and that’s the end of it.’
‘I thought you would hate me.’ Mo was still sobbing.
‘How could I hate you, Mum? You have never done anything but right by me. It is only because you are my mum that you don’t hate me. I’m a bastard and have treated you so badly in the past, but I promise that I will make it up to you. I swear on my late father’s life.’
Joan was in her front garden, doing a bit of weeding, when Charlie clicked the gate and walked up the path.
‘Hi, love, what are you doing here?’
‘Are you alone?’
‘Colin will be back from work in twenty and the kids are
out the back – why, what’s up?’
‘I know about my dad not being my real dad but I don’t want to know anything about my real dad, if you get me. Mum will say all this to you so obviously pretend you don’t know.’
‘Oh love…’
‘Don’t say any more – I can’t even talk about it and that’s not why I’m here. I’m here because of what happened between us. Firstly, I wanted to apologise for my actions. I mean – what was I thinking of? It was just wrong.’
‘OK.’ Joan knew he was itching to carry on.
‘It’s just all these secrets – and look what happens when they come out. It’s going to take me forever to get my head round Dad, so I guess what I’m saying is that can we keep what happened between us, between ourselves, please? It’s nothing to do with me or you, just Mum. She’s suffered so much in her life, and the betrayal she would feel from us both if you eventually told her, would actually be too great for
her to bear, I think. You are without doubt too good a friend for her to lose, especially over me.’
‘Oh Charlie, I would never ever tell anyone, and I promise you that. I know we didn’t kill anyone, but yes, what we did was wrong. No, I will rephrase that. What I did was wrong. I’m the married one, for God’s sake. Colin is my soulmate, and your mother is indeed my best friend. I should never have jeopardised either of those relationships.’
Charlie hugged her. ‘Thanks, Joan.’ He walked towards the front gate, then turned around. ‘You old cougar, you.’
‘Not so much of the old!’ Joan giggled and carried on weeding.
– Chapter Twenty Six –
Lily would not stop whining the whole way up the drive about not wanting to go to After-school Club.
‘You love Running Club, Lily, now just stop moaning.’ Robbie raised his voice so much that Lily started to cry.
‘Daddy always lets me off clubs if I don’t want to go.’
‘He does actually,’ Lola piped up in her sensible voice.
‘Well, I’m sorry but today I have plans until four-thirty so you will both have to wait.’
‘I want my daddy,’ Lily carried on.
‘And so do I,’ Robbie replied. ‘He could sort you spoiled brats out. Now get into class please, and I’ll see you later.’
He caught sight of handsome Charlie holding Rosie’s hand as they walked up the drive and did a silent wolf-whistle.
Dana, wearing her dark sunglasses, walked slowly up with Tommy and saw Alana saying goodbye to Eliska.
‘Are you rushing off to work?’ she asked.
‘No, not today. I am working from home, but I’ve time for a coffee if you want one. We could stop off at Rosco’s.’
‘No, not there,’ Dana said quickly.
‘Meet me at mine then. I’ll have to chuck you out about ten if that’s OK?’
‘OK, great. See you in a minute.’
‘Kettle’s on, get yourself at the kitchen table, girl,’ Alana instructed her friend.
‘God, if this table could talk we’d have enough material for a blockbuster,’ Dana said, and attempted a smile. When she took off her glasses, Alana noticed her swollen eyes.
