The Faintest Spark: Roadmap to Your Heart, Book #1.5

by Christina Lee

  He yanked up the back of my T-shirt and his fingertips walked down the knobs of my spine forcing me to bend at the waist. In the mirror, I watched as he hungrily eyed my ass and my cock immediately swelled in response. He squeezed my cheeks and when his thumb dipped along my crease, my knees shook. “This is mine. I can’t let anybody else have it.”

  I whimpered. Holy fuck. The things he said ignited me like a firecracker.

  “Yeah?” I asked, my voice shaking with renewed determination. Yearning and sheer frustration careened like wayward trains inside of me. “You gonna show me how much you want it?”

  Without responding, I heard his fingers fumble on his belt buckle as he unzipped his jeans, almost certainly to release his aching cock if his moan was any indication. His hands back on my ass, he parted my cheeks open, exposing me to him. I trembled and attempted to pull away before I jizzed all over myself. But he held firm to my hips as he leaned forward and planted a wet kiss on the small of my back. Fuck.

  He lifted a hand to draw a digit between his lips as I squirmed beneath him. Finding my crease, he circled my pucker and nudged the tip inside. “Such a greedy little hole. Sucking on my finger like this.”

  Goddamn, he was going to make me come.

  “Uhhhgg,” I groaned at the slight burn as I thrust back forcing him all the way inside. “Don’t want your finger. Want your cock.”

  “Fuck. Such a slut for it.” He kissed my neck as his finger slid easily in and out of my ass. “Aren’t you, baby?”

  “I want it. Bad,” I gasped as I ground my ass against his hand and squeezed his digit to show him how much. “Just fuck me already.”

  “Holy hell.” He slid his finger from my hole and I heard more fumbling and crinkling as he speedily tore open a condom and rolled it down his length.

  His breaths heavy against my skin, he lined up his dick and slowly pressed inside. My chest felt tight, and my ass tingled, but when he drove in further with one breath-stealing thrust, I saw stars. An explosion of fireworks. A super-fucking-nova.

  “Nothing’s ever felt this good,” he gasped, his head bent back, his lips parted open as he railed me relentlessly. “Need you, Sawyer. Fuck, do I need you.”

  It was the perfect mix of fullness and burn, and all manner of coherent thought left my brain. Everything boiled down to the flawless sensation of his thick cock drilling me with overwhelming precision.

  A few pumps more and his thrusts faltered, his legs shook. His head swung forward and he met my gaze in the mirror. “Sawyer,” he rasped out and then he was shuddering and panting and coming inside me.

  He bent forward to rest his head between my shoulder blades as he got his breathing under control.

  Holy shit. I could feel my stiff and angry cock leaking on the floor and I grasped onto it with shaky fingers, ready to pump myself into oblivion.

  He gently pulled out of me, snapped off the condom and threw it in the trash. After yanking up his pants, he fell to his knees right there on the floor. Clutching at my thighs, he spun me away from the sink. He batted my fingers away, and his lips dove down on my cock.

  “Aaaaah.” I was enveloped in his wet and hot mouth and he sucked me with the perfect pressure as my balls instantly drew up tight. If he didn’t back up, I was going to spurt down his throat right this instant.

  Gripping his hair with my fingers, I attempted to push him away, but he only clutched my hips tighter and shook his head.

  “This time,” he muttered after he drew up toward the crown and suckled the head, “you’ll let me taste all of it.”

  His words sparked an electric current up my spine and with little preamble, I shot my load past his lips, gripping the sink behind me for leverage. He gagged a little but kept his throat working, swallowing as much as he could. Some trickled out the side of his mouth and hell, even that was hot. “Fuck, Mal.”

  Once I was spent, he released my cock and swiped at his mouth. “Damn.”

  Getting to his feet, he tugged me against him, his fingers burrowing in my hair.

  We stood there with our arms entwined, breathing into each other’s necks as reality came crashing down on us. I imagined stealing more of these kinds of moments with him in shitty bathrooms away from any prying eyes and having an even harder time getting over him.

  “Can’t keep doing this,” I said against his throat. “Always worrying about getting caught. Don’t want to keep secrets no more.”

  He drew his face away from me, his fingers clutching my jaw. “I know, baby. I know.”

  He stepped away, tucked himself in, and zipped up his pants as I struggled to do the same. As he opened the door, he turned back once more. “I’m sorry.”

  15

  Malachi

  My heart rose to my throat as I turned left into the parking lot of Fisher’s garage. I was dropping off my bike for a service call, but my skin felt so tight—the anticipation of seeing Sawyer again so high my heart was beating at a frenetic pace.

  I pulled into an empty space near the open garage door and looked over my shoulder to the street. Smoke had offered to give me a ride back using one of the Chrome trucks, so he was a couple of minutes behind. I knew he felt indebted to Sawyer, so he saw this as an opportunity to personally invite him to his birthday bash at the Hog’s Den next weekend.

  The service desk was packed with customers awaiting repairs or in line to cash out. Inside the garage, Sawyer was bent near the tire on a black Roadster with a wrench. His gray coveralls were rolled at the forearms, exposing his colorful tattoos, and his dark hair was mussed on top as if he’d been running his fingers through it. What I wouldn’t give to touch a stray curl or kiss that pouty lip he was fishing between his teeth as he worked the bolt loose on the frame.

  Seeing him again was almost too damn much. Overwhelming need coursed through me, my stomach tightening in anticipation. It felt like a gong ringing in my ears and signaling in my chest. Just being near him verified how much I wanted to make this work—to somehow make him mine.

  I couldn’t drag my eyes away even as Smoke pulled into the parking lot and slipped out of the truck to join me near my bike.

  “What the hell is your problem?” he smirked, throwing me a strange look.

  “Nothing,” I replied, finally hopping off my bike. “Just got shit on my mind. Let’s get this over with.”

  As we stepped inside the door, we were greeted with waves and fist bumps from a couple of the mechanics, one a club member I recognized from the party and another the Scorpions had recently hired. “Good to see ya.”

  As if startled by my voice, Sawyer glanced up and as his eyes met mine, they softened with affection, which made my chest feel tight and funny. But as he swiped his hands down his pants and noticed Smoke alongside me, they filled with hesitation. “What’s up?”

  “Hey, man,” Smoke remarked, reaching his hand out for a shake. “Giving Mal a ride back and while I’m here, thought I’d personally invite you to the Hog’s Den on Saturday. Just a little celebration with family and good friends.”

  “I’ll be there,” Sawyer replied, his eyes alight with gratitude and I blew out a breath of relief that these guys could land on solid ground.

  Sawyer turned to me, his hand outstretched, and when our palms connected, I felt a zing of electricity shoot through me.

  “Dropping off your bike?” he asked as he withdrew his fingers, but I still felt them there like a caress. I nodded and when his gaze momentarily snagged on my lips, I bit back a groan.

  “I’ll text you when it’s ready.” He walked the few steps to where my bike was parked and gripped it by the handlebars.

  “Sounds good.” I watched as he carefully wheeled my bike to an empty well. “Um, is Fish around?”

  “Yeah, sure,” he replied, only looking back briefly. “Inside.”

  We stepped into the waiting area, which had cleared a bit since we arrived and found Fish in the back office. He’d just gotten off the phone as he waved us in, already aware of my se
rvice appointment since I’d called to confirm a few days back. It was a lame attempt to convince him I was being aboveboard since he was sure to be suspicious had I showed up unannounced.

  We shot the breeze about the junkyard since Smoke also had a vested interest in the business given the unusual art he made on the side with scrap metal.

  Fish walked us out to the truck and as I slid onto the front seat I tried like hell to avert my gaze from Sawyer’s direction. I blew out a breath when I noticed in a quick sidelong glance the garage door had been lowered.

  As we waved our good-byes and I felt Smoke’s appraising gaze on me, I finally snapped, the pressure inside me having stretched as taut as a rubber band. “Why the hell you keep looking at me?”

  He cleared his throat, taking his sweet old time responding. “You know, back when Vaughn and I only had a mutual crush, we used to stare at each other a lot.”

  My shoulders stiffened. “What the fuck you talking about?”

  He shrugged like it was no big deal when he knew damn well it was absolutely everything. “All the eye-fucking going on between you and Sawyer.”

  I balled my fists as panic along with frustration punched a hole in my chest. If Smoke noticed, had anybody else? “Don’t know what the hell you’re getting at.”

  “Okay, whatever,” he replied in a wavering voice, throwing up his hands in exasperation at the same time. “I’m here if you need to talk.”

  The car ride back was tense and silent until I finally swallowed down my fear, which was lodged like a sharp-edged stone in my throat. “I’ve…never been attracted to a man before.”

  Smoke’s clenched jaw smoothed out, probably relieved he hadn’t fucked anything up between us. “Until Sawyer?”

  “I guess.” My voice sounded small and unsteady in my ears. “Maybe I just never recognized it or even considered it a possibility.”

  “I suppose it’s not that obvious for some people,” he replied and the tension drained out of me. Guess I always knew he’d understand. Maybe I should’ve shared this with Smoke or Vaughn at the onset of these feelings. But at the time, they’d felt so remote, and now they had become just another part of me.

  “You guys got close through all of this shit that went down?” he asked tentatively, as he stopped at a red light.

  “Yeah,” I replied, as I stared out the window at the empty grocery store parking lot. “At first I thought it was just my way of being protective over these men—sort of how I felt about you when I saw what condition you’d been in with the Asylum.”

  Smoke nodded, his eyes softening. “And?”

  “It started feeling like more. Way more.” I shrugged. “I mean there’s an age difference between us, so I don’t know why he’d be interested in an old geezer like me.”

  Smoke laughed. “Yeah, right. ’Bout time you started using a cane, old man.”

  I grinned and ran my fingers through the silver at my temples, considering the fact that Sawyer may have been younger, but he was braver than me in a lot of ways. Definitely an old soul. Maybe that was why every time I was near him I felt some profound connection.

  “Started looking forward to his calls and late night visits. We’d talk about tons of stupid shit and watch bad TV,” I said, now recalling my stomach performing a little flip over early texts from him. “I was only trying to get his mind off everything. He was struggling, you know, and I guess I…helped him through some stuff. All that shit with Jake was personal to him—not my story to tell, so that’s all I’ll say.”

  “Fuck, I didn’t know,” Smoke replied, thumping his fist against the steering wheel. “I’m sorry, man.”

  “S’okay. You were dealing with your own shit and he wasn’t supposed to let on how involved he was,” I replied, nudging his shoulder. “But the aftereffects are that he’s sleeping like shit and Jake’s been showing up in his nightmares.”

  “Goddamn.” He rushed his hand through his blond hair. “I get it, though. Maybe…I should reach out to him?”

  “I think he’d appreciate that.” Early on, Sawyer had feared Smoke and Vaughn would hate him for having to pretend he was loyal to Jake while undercover.

  After another beat of silence, Smoke quietly asked, “So what do you plan to do about it?”

  My chest squeezed painfully tight. “Ain’t nothing I can do.”

  He nodded. “I thought that too…at first.”

  “I’m the president of this club,” I muttered, staring out the window. “These guys wouldn’t…”

  “Or maybe they would,” he remarked, turning into the parking lot of Chrome.

  “Ask yourself if having someone in your life means a hell of a lot more than going on how you’ve been,” he said. “Not my place to say, but I know you’ve been lonely.”

  I sank against the seat, shutting my eyes, my pulse shallow and erratic. “I’d lose respect.”

  “Maybe even gain it in some cases,” he replied, putting the truck in park.

  My shoulders sagged. “I wouldn’t want to drag him into anything.”

  “How about letting him decide?”

  He patted my knee and stepped out of the truck, leaving me to my own stormy and confusing thoughts, trying like hell to find any ray of light.

  When I finally gripped the handle and pushed open the door, I knew exactly what I needed to do.

  16

  Sawyer

  Firing off a text to let Mal know his bike was ready for pickup, my blood thrummed through my veins. Even though Fish had given me the heads-up he was dropping off his hog this morning, my heart knocked hard against my chest when I first laid eyes on him across the grease-stained floor. The sexy scruff on his chin and the salt-and-pepper hair I just had my hands in a few days back. I felt the tension between us immediately and unless I was mistaken, he still wanted me as much as I wanted him.

  The last of the guys had already left for the night and the front office was closed. I liked staying late to finish jobs because it was quieter in the evenings but also because unless Fish had me patrolling or doing some type of club business, I had nowhere else to go but home to an empty shoebox apartment.

  Sometimes I’d head out for a beer with the guys or meet at the clubhouse for a video game or two, but lately I just wasn’t up for it. Besides, I didn’t need any more scrutiny from Fish about my friendship with Mal, and truth be told, I was grateful Mal had contacted him first to ask about me servicing his bike.

  Hearing the rumble of a truck, I glanced through the window at Mal being dropped off by Jonas, his second in command. What looked like terse words passed between them through the open door, and I bristled, suddenly envisioning our affection for each other being discovered and a mutiny being called by those under his charge.

  Fuck. I would never want to mess with his livelihood. With that thought clicked solidly into place, I hung up my coveralls and brushed off my sleeves telling myself this was all business. I was a mechanic who worked on bikes and Mal was not only a customer but a friend of the club. I probably should’ve had him pick up his bike in the morning when more people were around. Too late now. Besides, we were both adults, for Christ’s sake, and I had made myself perfectly clear in that bathroom last week.

  Goddamn, that bathroom. I was pretty much a wreck after he’d fucked me boneless. Craig thought it was hilarious I’d emerged from a hookup flushed and panting and could only sit in the corner and sip my drink the rest of the night.

  When Mal rapped on the door, I unlocked it to let him inside. One of his hands was tucked into the pocket of his tight faded jeans and the word Prez was stitched onto his black leather cut. If that didn’t reinforce my recent thoughts, I didn’t know what would. “You’re working late.”

  “Yeah, I like finishing what I started in the morning if it’s possible. Besides, don’t have many places to go,” I said and then turned away from his penetrating gaze before I professed too much. I walked over to his bike and patted the seat as he followed behind. “If it still rides hard for yo
u, let me know. Should be all set, though.”

  I continued rambling about the type of oil I used as I gripped the handlebars and rolled his bike toward the garage door. I could feel his gaze on me the entire time, and I swallowed down the boulder lodged in my throat.

  “I told Smoke and Jonas,” he blurted out. I turned to look back at him wondering if I had heard him properly. “Just wanted you to know…”

  “Told them what?” My pulse pounded in my ears as I stepped back from his bike.

  As he strode closer, I noticed his flushed cheeks, his softened eyes. “Started by confiding in Smoke and afterward I told Jonas…about you.”

  My shoulders stiffened. “What about me?”

  “That we’d gotten to be friends and well…that you make me feel things.”

  “What kind of things?” I asked as my heart battered against my ribcage.

  “Like maybe if given the chance…” His fingers reached out for mine. “I could be happy again.”

  My chest ached with intense longing as my brain clouded with his words, unable to wrap my head around what he was telling me.

  “Holy shit, Mal. What did they—”

  “They were actually cool,” he replied, a small smile crooking his lip. “And supportive. Guess Jonas surprised me most of all. Said he sort of wondered what was going on because I was acting strange. Told me to handle it sooner rather than later.”

  His hand trembled in mine. This was fucking huge for him. “I figured I could tell the guys in stages and—”

  “Take a breath; it’s okay.” I tugged on his fingers to pull him toward me. “It’s a lot to take in.”