Turned On_Take Me Private

by Emma Bryson

  I dragged my feet and picked up my gear. Chase was already antsy and a little agro about my being here—I could read him like a book; we’d been friends since kindergarten. And the long, concerned looks he kept giving me when he thought I wouldn’t notice were starting to play on my nerves, too.

  “Alright, dude, I’ll see you Sunday.” Chase slapped me on the back as I made my way out the door.

  “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. And for fuck’s sake, sort your shit out with the girl, huh?” Chase stared me down and I shifted uncomfortably. “I wouldn’t want Chlo to miss the next Wallis monthly brunch on account of your crappy decisions.”

  “Yeah, yeah,” I mumbled. “Spare me the lecture. See you at the gym.”

  * * *

  I locked my car and headed up to my apartment. Heath smiled and buzzed me in.

  “Negan and his guys left this morning—nice bunch. I’m sure you’ll be happy with what they did.”

  “Thanks, Heath.”

  I took the elevator up to the seventh floor and let myself into my apartment. It smelled like chemicals and fresh paint, but on the whole, it was pretty much the same. Cold. Sterile. Lonely.

  I thought of my little sister Maddy’s apartment, and even Chloe’s crappy digs with Liv. Despite all they went through as kids, somehow they made everywhere they went into homes—hell, they’d even made makeshift families—and all by themselves. My place felt almost cruel in comparison.

  My stomach hit the floor along with my sports bag. All this time I’d taken the safe option to try to support my family. I’d hustled to make things work and helped to pay off my sisters’ loans, my mom’s medical bills, only finally going to business school when I could afford it alongside all of the other expenses. Not only that, but I’d sacrificed time—while Chase was out partying and making the most of his lifestyle, I’d kept my head down and kept hustling to make sure that my sisters would have the opportunities they would have had if Dad was still alive.

  I sat down on the floor. And now they didn’t need me anymore. And if I was being brutally honest with myself...neither did Chase. Or at least, he didn’t need me to be so protective of his reputation. The realization struck me with such a force it almost knocked me off center. I felt kind of ashamed, like I’d let them down. They were all fine, and here I was still using them to hide away from a shot at happiness. I was still taking the safe route, when what I really needed to be doing was putting myself out there.

  I hadn’t manned up when Dad had died—I’d opted out. I’d put my life on hold.

  It was time to reclaim it.

  Olivia

  Nate was really killing my lady boner. Being balls-deep in a pint of ice cream was all I’d felt like lately, and I was back wearing my comfort clothes, or lack thereof—topless, in holey swearing-kitten pajama bottoms.

  The worst of it was that in place of my best friend, whom I’d been banished from talking to about this ever, I only had artificial intelligence.

  “Siri, what’s the best breakup movie of all time?”

  “The Princess Bride.”

  “Thanks, Siri.” I took another spoon of cookie dough ice cream. “Siri, why do guys have to be such juvenile douchebags?”

  “Looking up why do guys have to be—”

  “Never mind, Siri.”

  The most annoying part of breaking up with someone who you were never really dating in the first place was the happy face I was going to have to plaster on when Chloe came back from her induction. I sighed. There were only so many times I could rewatch Friends before I spontaneously combusted.

  Coffee. I needed coffee—the magical juice of getting my shit together.

  Just as I flicked the coffee pot on, there was a knock on the door.

  “Go away! There’s no one home!” I yelled, throwing a useless hand in the air in a noncommittal gesture. There was no way I was putting a top on just to lend Mildred a cup of sugar.

  For fuck’s sake. I was going to turn into a Mildred. Forever alone.

  Halfway to my room, I heard the key scratch at the lock.

  “What the hell?” I muttered, walking toward the door. Either some creep was trying to break in, or a day on my own had already driven me insane.

  The door flung open and Nate started, wide-eyed.

  “You really do have an interesting relationship with clothes, huh?”

  I scowled. “I could say the same thing about you and doors. Have you always hated them, or is it just this one in particular?”

  Nate turned and shut the door gently. “Liv, I’m sorry.”

  I snorted, turning toward the kitchen and my freshly brewed magic juice. “Tell that to the door,” I mumbled, as he pulled his phone from his pocket and strode over.

  “No, really—Liv, I mean it. I’m serious.” Nate followed me down the hallway as I surreptitiously picked a dirty shirt off the floor and pulled it over my head to hide my traitorous puckered nipples before Nate could see what effect he still had on me.

  Nate followed me into the kitchen.

  “I know, I’ve been really weird about things, but I hashed it out with Google and apparently I’m having something called a ‘quarter-life crisis.’”

  I stared at Nate incredulously. He shrugged. “It’s a real thing.

  “But I want to work on this. I’ll prove it.” Nate pushed a button on his phone.

  “Siri, call Chloe.” He put his phone on the counter before sitting at the breakfast bar. My mouth quirked. Looked like we had similar taste in friends.

  Chloe answered on the third ring. “Nate? What the hell? I’m at work—”

  “I know.”

  “Is everything okay? Is Mom all right?”

  “Yeah everything’s fine.” Nate looked straight into my eyes as he talked to his sister. “Chlo, I’m dating your flatmate. If she’ll still have me. I’m hoping she will. And I know that might be weird for you, and that sucks, but—”

  “Oh. Thank. God. Seriously, you two have made eyes at each other ever since I was sick with mono and you slept on our couch.”

  Nate looked a little put-out with Chloe’s abruptness. “Yeah, but—”

  “Look, I’m not going to lie, it’ll probably be a little weird for me that my brother and best friend are dating, and I have no idea what Liv sees in you, to be honest, but it’s about bloody time you put your own happiness before ours, Nate. And you of anyone should know that all family wants for family is for them to be happy.”

  My heart pounded and I felt tears start to prickle the corners of my eyes as Nate levelled me with his signature Wallis puppy-dogs. I pounced on the counter, Nate pulling me over to his side. “Hate to break up this mush fest, but I’m going to kiss your brother now.”

  “Ew, gross!” Chloe hung up, the smile in her voice unmistakable.

  “God, you’re so beautiful,” he mumbled as he reached for me and his mouth crashed into mine.

  My stomach flipped as he pulled me toward him, grinding me up against the side of the bench as his firm hands roved over my body.

  “I’m sorry about what I said about camming, I was being an idiot,” Nate said as he peppered my neck with open-mouthed kisses.

  I took his face in my hands and explored his lips. I’d opened my mouth to him, opened my body to him, and opened my heart to him—now, he was finally opening his heart to mine.

  “I know,” I said, taking him by the hand and leading him back to my room.

  “And I’m so willing to take a chance on this. Even if I have to give up PT clients. Or hire a new manager for the gym.”

  I growled. “Oooh, big game talk.”

  Nate stopped mid-step. “I mean it.”

  His eyes bored into mine as he picked me up and dropped me onto the bed.

  Finally, things were starting to make sense.

  Chapter Twelve<
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  Nate

  I bounded out to Liv’s car.

  “Easy, tiger!” Liv laughed as she threw me the keys. After two weeks of being together, Liv and I were starting to sync into each other’s rhythms—her, a night owl with an inclination towards making love all night, and me, figuring out how to fit in clients and the gym around a schedule that wasn’t so ball-breaking.

  Since getting together with Liv I’d dialed back on my client responsibilities, handing over most to my new gym manager. It was time for me to start handing over the reins and living life, opening myself to the possibilities the world had to offer.

  I unlocked the car. “We’ll be late if we don’t hurry.” I turned to find Liv grabbing my butt.

  “Is it so bad that I want us to make the most of our last minutes of freedom?” Liv said, kissing my neck. “You know how thin the walls are...it’s not that I’m not looking forward to having my best friend back, but we won’t have much privacy, either.”

  I pulled her sweet body up against mine. “There’s always my place.”

  Liv raised her eyebrows. “Meh, not as many toys.”

  I chuckled. “I’ll give you a drawer.”

  Liv smirked, murmuring under her breath, “Guess I won’t have room for my XXL anal probe, then...”

  * * *

  I rested my hand on Liv’s thigh as we travelled toward the airport. Even although we’d spent every moment we could together over the past couple of weeks, I still couldn’t help but touch her every chance I got.

  I never knew I could be this happy. The real, in-the-moment kind of happy.

  Liv spotted Chloe waiting for us as we rounded the corner. I pulled the car to a stop and Chloe fumbled her bags into the back of the car.

  Circling around to greet her, I pulled her into a bear hug.

  “Oh. My. God. Who are you, and what have you done with my brother?” Chloe laughed as she pulled me out to an arm’s distance away and looked me up and down.

  “You’re wearing pajama pants. In public. In the afternoon. Can you get any more embarrassing?” Chloe punched me on the arm as I ruffled her hair.

  A car honked at us. “Take a chill pill!” I yelled as I hustled around to the driver’s side.

  Chloe smushed herself into the back, winking at Liv as she slid into the car.

  “So, what have you been up to? Actually, no. Scratch that, I really, really don’t want to know, do I? Please tell me you didn’t have sex on my bed...”

  Liv chuckled as Chloe spun off into a detailed review of what she’d been up to for the last couple of weeks.

  As I turned the radio on quietly my heart sang as I thought about these girls—my family—in the car with me.

  Liv muttered something to Chloe and then Chloe turned to me.

  “Wait, what? You’re still staying at our place? Weren’t your renovations supposed to be finished, like, a week ago?”

  I shifted my hands on the steering wheel. “Well, yeah. What can I say? The renovation gods have been fickle.”

  Chloe narrowed her eyes at me. “I thought you were only getting a touch-up. It can’t take that long, surely.”

  I shrugged and flicked a glance at Liv. “There, um, there was a paint spillage, or something. I’m sure they’ve just about finished. Any day now.”

  Chloe shifted uneasily. “Well, if you’re sure, because, I mean, I’m fine with this whole...thing. But flatting with my brother...” Chloe made a face, then launched off into another story again.

  * * *

  A week later and my apartment renovations were finally done. Living with Liv and Chloe was awkward as fuck at times, and all three of us breathed a collective sigh of relief when the phone call finally came through.

  “Liv, want to come check the place out?” I nudged Liv with my foot under the breakfast table and waggled my eyebrows at her when Chloe turned around to pour cereal.

  “Um, sure. I can’t stay though, I have a show tonight.” Liv yawned. Between a more regular camming schedule and sharing a bed with me, it was no wonder she was feeling worn-out.

  I wolfed down the rest of my breakfast and packed my bags, eager to get back to my apartment.

  “Hey, wait up! Sheesh, I didn’t know you were that eager to leave.” Liv pecked me on the cheek as I made sure I’d packed everything.

  I looked at her pointedly. “You know as well as I do that things will be a damned sight easier once they get back to normal.”

  Liv raised an eyebrow. “Yeah. As long as ‘normal’ means I get to see you more than once a week, then I’m all in.” She swung her backpack over her shoulder.

  As we headed towards the car, my stomach filled with butterflies.

  Olivia

  I tried to take a breath as my insecurities started to resurface. Once he’d moved back into his own apartment, were things still going to work between us? Part of me felt like after the spontaneous combustion of our forced proximity, with time and space things might start to fizzle out.

  I bit my lip, thinking back to the evening I’d spent with Nate in his apartment. There was no doubt in my mind now that I wanted to be with him. But if things didn’t work out, it was possible I wouldn’t just lose the man I loved, I’d lose my best friend, too.

  The fear of the unknown was getting to me, so much so that I had to make a conscious effort to just enjoy this moment—the one that was happening right now, in this car, with Nate’s hand drawing effortless circles on my inner thigh as he drove us to his newly renovated apartment with a stupidly happy smile plastered on his face.

  Wait. There was something weird about this. Why was Nate so stupidly happy about a cream-colored apartment?

  * * *

  Walking into his building, we greeted Heath and waited for the elevator. As we made our way up to the seventh floor Nate pulled me close, kissing the sweet spot on my neck just under my ear.

  “Have I told you lately how adorable you look when you’re nervous?” Nate smiled as whispered into my ear, holding his cheek against mine.

  I scoffed. “I’m not nervous. Wait—what? Should I be nervous?” My heart started to pound as Nate unlocked the door. “I don’t know why I should be nervous. I’m not going to be the one living—”

  My breath caught as Nate flung the door open. My mouth fell open and my eyes bugged out.

  Nate chuckled as he walked into the middle of the room, gesturing to the walls and spinning around to look at me.

  “Do you like it?”

  My jaw still barely a few inches from the floor, I looked around the place. It was almost unrecognizable. The wall separating the kitchen and lounge was gone. A bright, graffiti-art mural wrapped around half the apartment, with a Banksy-style figure adorning the opposite wall. All the fittings were shiny chrome.

  I walked up to the mural, tracing my fingers along it. “This is...incredible. Who did this?” I said, turning to Nate.

  He shrugged. “Well, before he started his own painting business, my next-door neighbor’s son got into a bit of trouble for tagging. I asked him about it, he drew up some designs, and I told him to go wild.”

  Nate cleared his throat. “And—” He looked to the ceiling and switched the lights off. With the blinds closed, the apartment was just dark enough to see the pale glow of light-up stars scattered all over the roof.

  “I can’t believe...you did...wow. Just wow.” Nate wanted me here...he was making room for me. And my face was plastered with the stupidest grin.

  Nate switched the lights back on. “There’s one more thing...” He took my hand, leading me towards the bedrooms.

  I blushed. “Okay, but we’ll have to be quick—I have a show in a couple hours.”

  Nate didn’t say anything, but stopped outside the door of his spare room. I frowned, looking between him and the panel that had been installed on the door. “And this is?�
�

  Nate nodded towards the door handle. “Open it and take a look.”

  As I opened the door, my stomach dropped to the floor. Icicle fairy lights lined the walls. Pillows, cushions, and blankets were stacked in a huge pile, and a laptop and webcam were set up on a desk against the opposite wall.

  “Oh my god. Nate. I—”

  “The panel on the door has a switch on this side that you can turn on when you’re live. It’s what music artists use for home recording studios.” Nate cleared his throat and a flush rose in his cheeks. “I didn’t know what kind of costumes and props you needed, but if you want to keep a separate wardrobe over here, just say the word.”

  I wheeled around the room, touching the blankets, running my fingers along the desk. Nate massaged his neck with one hand. “I know you won’t be able to move in full-time, but I was thinking perhaps Chloe and I could share custody. Maybe I could have weekends. Or we could do week-on, week-off.”

  I smiled, running and jumping into his arms and kissing every part of him I could get my hands on between words. “This. Is. The. Best. Surprise. Ever.”

  Nate smiled. “Does this mean you’ll be my girlfriend, or...”

  I laughed, jumping down again, grabbing his hand, and pulling him down into the pile of blankets as I kissed him hard.

  “Fuck yes, Nate Wallis. I will girlfriend you so hard you won’t even know what’s hit you.”

  * * * * *

  Acknowledgments

  Thanks to you, for reading this book. Super-stupendous pumpkin-spice thanks if you take a second to help a newbie author out by leaving a review!

  Thanks to Kerri, for seeing the potential in this manuscript and plucking it out of the slushpile. Plus an extra helping of thanks for making this book so much better! It’s been a pleasure working with you.