Hard Like Water

by Yan Lianke

  I didn’t have any news from Hongmei.

  Every night, however, I was with Hongmei in my dreams.

  Suddenly, one day, they began interrogating me nonstop. By this point they had already posted the announcements of my and Hongmei’s scheduled execution along all of Chenggang’s streets and alleys. Our names and photographs even appeared over the well platform on Front Cheng Street and the millstone on Center Cheng Street, with red Xs over our names. Behind the village were the ruins of Cheng Temple, where the original columns of the Qixian Great Hall and the manuscript depository building were still standing. Flyers announcing my and Hongmei’s scheduled execution were posted on the columns and fluttered in the wind. Cheng Qinglin told me about this when he came to see me, and after he left they began to subject me to a nonstop interrogation.

  They made me recount my story over and over, beginning with my transition from the army to Chenggang; from the first day of the rural revolution to the day I demolished Cheng Temple; from the deaths of Cheng Guizhi and Cheng Qingdong, to Cheng Tianqing’s insanity and Cheng Tianmin’s fate of being buried alive under the demolished temple. For the sake of those comrades sitting in the interrogation room listening to my stories, I maintained my loyalty to and faith in the organization. I didn’t conceal anything, nor did I exaggerate anything. They said Hongmei and I were the most honest prisoners they had ever encountered (unfortunately, they didn’t call us revolutionaries). They said that our accounts of our crimes (which is to say, our revolutionary activities) were identical, and the only discrepancy involved our discussions of our sexual relationship, in that Hongmei apparently used euphemistic language, while I was more direct (revolutionary affection, comradely love, the extraordinary splendor of a prairie set ablaze by a single spark, telling the Party frankly, not concealing a single thing, the revolution will mend holes as large as the sky, and we’ll correct errors as large as the earth, the revolutionary cauldron can smelt things that seem impossible to smelt, and revolutionary sentiment can embrace all kinds of love).

  However, they still executed us.

  On that day—an early spring day following a long winter—the entire world was brimming with the tender smell of budding vegetation. The execution site was on the banks of Thirteen Li River, two li from Chenggang. At that location, the riverbank was wide, the flowing water could be heard clearly, and there were large red and white egg-shaped stones everywhere. There were countless slogans everywhere, such as Bring down the Gang of Four, the People must be liberated and Viciously criticize Gao Aijun’s and Xia Hongmei’s anti-revolutionary and adulterous murder, and stomp on their perpetually stained corpses. (The desolate autumn wind has returned and has changed the world.) On the embankment, on the willows, the stones, and the columns supporting the stage that had been erected for the public trial—those hyperexcited slogans were like autumn leaves, and the black ink of those words was like summer rain. The trial stage was a meter and a half high and had been erected on the embankment. People had gathered beneath the stage, their heads resembling goat droppings covering a mountainside. People filled every road leading to this site like pigs, horses, or oxen that had been released from their enclosures. On the stage there was a solemn and respectful atmsophere, but below it was a giant hubbub. The crowds gathered included members of Chenggang’s dozen or so production brigades, who had all come to watch the public hearing, and also outsiders who had come from all over for the spectacle. When the official used a megaphone to order me to be transported from a tent truck to the trial stage, I saw the people who had gathered below the stage were frothing like a river or ocean, as they shouted to one another, spittle flying in all directions. Their slogans collided in midair, as the tide ebbed and flowed, while on the ground voices jostled. Those shouting slogans raised their fists, such that the arena came to resemble a forest of arms, and the chattering of those who had come to watch the excitement sounded like a wild animal caught in a torrential rainstorm. The people in front craned their necks to look up at the stage, while the ones in back stomped their feet and cursed the people in front of them. One person stepped on another person’s foot, making him croak like a frog, while someone else bumped into another person’s head, making him howl like a wolf. Feeling distressed and agitated, I searched the crowd for my mother; my son, Hongsheng; and my daughter, Honghua; and Hongmei’s daughter, Tao’er, but in the seething mass I couldn’t find even a single person I recognized. The sun was blazing, and my mother and children were like blades of grass hidden in a vast field.

  The sky is vast and the earth is boundless

  when the wind blows and the grass moves, I see sheep grazing

  the earth is boundless and the sky is vast

  my family, where are you now?

  I look forward to the stars and to the moon

  I only look forward to the sun rising over the mountains

  I look forward to being able to see my family in the crowd assembled below the stage

  I only look forward to seeing Hongsheng grow big and strong

  I only look forward to seeing Honghua able to bloom in winter

  Like Hongmei, I only look forward to the possibility that after the revolution, each new generation will supercede those that preceded it

  I only hope that they’ll accept the revolutionary guns

  and carry the red banners on their shoulders

  and proceed with the Party into the storm, without looking back

  through rain and waves, their will won’t flag

  if we are going to do something, we should do this sort of thing

  and if we are going to be someone, we should be this sort of person

  my children, you are neither young nor old

  why can’t you help your father out?

  for example, your father is shouldering a load that weighs over a thousand jin

  while your own load weighs only about eight hundred

  the scene on the stage was solemn and dignified

  while below the stage there were vast crowds

  the thunderous sound of slogans rose and fell

  and the sound of talking flowed forward like a storm

  people bump into each other in a bloody state of military emergency

  fists pound each other as the noise of battle creates an urgent situation

  I see that across the land the four seas are rising and waters are surging

  I watch as around the world the five continents are shaking and storms are raging

  suddenly the wind and waves grew still

  and the voices fell silent …

  I didn’t know what had happened, I simply saw a loudspeaker’s piercing cries streaking across my muddled brain. The crowd standing below the stage fell silent, and I saw that under the loudspeakers’ cries, Hongmei—who, like me, was also tied up—was escorted from a truck and made to kneel down on the stage.

  This was the first time I had seen Hongmei (my soul and my flesh, my spirit and my marrow!) since the interrogation after we had blown up Cheng Temple. She was still wearing that same pink, small-collared shirt and the same low-heeled shoes with the square toes. The moment she knelt down, our gazes collided. I saw that she was much thinner now, though her face was much more delicate and beautiful than before. When she saw me, her pale face began to turn light red. At that moment, I very much wanted to ask her where they had been holding her this past half year, and what they had been doing to her in prison every day. However, the moment our gazes met, and before her tears had time to appear, two armed police soldiers placed themselves between us, and like a wall they blocked our vision of one another, while also cutting off my train of thought.

  I had originally assumed we would have to kneel down together for half a day, like in a revolutionary struggle session, and therefore was surprised to discover that this so-called public trial merely had us kneel for about ten minutes while a judge who had been sent from the county court declared, “Let the public trial begin!” Another judge then read a quote
from Chairman Mao, followed by our sentence, after which the public trial came to a close.

  The judge announced that we were counterrevolutionary adulterous murderers, and as punishment for our multiple crimes we were sentenced to death, and the sentence would be implemented immediately.

  The judge who sentenced us to death had a low and sonorous voice that sounded majestic, and when he read the words “implemented immediately,” it was as if these were bullets being shot at our bodies. As he was reading those words, I thought I was going to collapse on stage, but to my surprise, after those words were broadcast over the loudspeaker, my body initially trembled and my heart lurched, but then I suddenly felt very calm, like a hero who has just forded a river. I remembered Li Yuhe’s spirited appearance before he was executed.

  The prison guards howl like wolves as I step forward … (appear on stage, “strike a pose”) … out of my cell.

  (Two Japanese military police push their way forward, as Li Yuhe stands there, majestic and unyielding. “Two horizontal steps” becomes “a single step,” then stop; “turn on one leg,” “lean on one leg to strike a pose.” Fearlessly he proceeds forward and pushes back the two Japanese military police.)

  (Li Yuhe touches his wounded chest and rubs his knee. Scorning his shackles and chains, he displays his noble spirit.)

  (Back flip followed by forward flip.) Don’t look at me, wearing these iron shackles / you can bind my arms and legs / but you can’t bind my lofty aspirations! / (Sings yuan ban tune) / That villain Hatoyama used every torture imaginable to get the secret code / My bones are broken, my flesh is flayed / But my will is as firm as steel. / Walking boldly to the execution ground, I look afar; / The red flag of revolution is raised on high, / The flames of resistance spread far and wide. / Japanese bandits, let’s see how much longer you can rage! / Once the storm has passed (changes to man sanyan tune) flowers will bloom, / New China will shine like the morning sun, / red banners will fly all over the country. / This thought heightens my confidence / And my resolve is strengthened. (Changes back to yuan ban tune) I have done very little for the Party / as the indomitable soldiers bravely march forward …

  Hongmei was struck by the bullets of the words “implemented immediately.” She had still been kneeling at the feet of the military police, but after hearing that the order would be implemented immediately, I saw her fall like a toppled tree or a collapsed mountain, after which she lay immobile on the stage. It was as if it was only then that she realized that she was going to be executed. Standing on the other side of those military police, I shouted, “Hongmei, everyone dies in the end. While we are still alive, we should live like people, and when we die, we should die like people.”

  Through the uproar, Hongmei heard my shouts. She raised her head and looked at me, and when she saw that I was standing in front of the stage, with my chest out and my head held straight, heroic and high-spirited, she appeared enlivened and attempted to stand up. At this moment, the loudspeakers once again began playing music and revolutionary melodies (like a timely rain).

  In addition to the loudspeakers positioned at each corner of the trial stage, the loudspeaker on the vehicle that had brought us over also started up, as did the village and town loudspeakers. In the blink of an eye, all the loudspeakers in every village and town nearby began playing simultaneously, as though struck by a highly infectious disease. The loudspeakers on the public trial stage were playing “Victory Relies Entirely on the Direction of the Party”; the ones on the escort vehicle were playing “Advancing while Holding High the Banner of the Dictatorship of the Proletariat”; the ones in Chenggang were playing “Singing about National Unity”; the ones to the south of town were playing “A Brand New Sun and Moon Shine Down on the Rivers and Mountains,” from the Peking Opera Red Brigade of Woman; and the ones on the banks of Thirteen Li River were playing “Fighting for the Liberation of Humanity” from the movie Song of the Dragon River. Also, coming down from the sky was “A Surprise Air Attack on Shajiabang”; from the west there was “Let the Red Banners of Revolution Be Planted Everywhere”; and from the north there were the heroic and brave calls of “An Eye for an Eye, and a Tooth for a Tooth.” Music fell like snowflakes, lyrics gurgled forth like ropes and cables, and songs spilled forth like waves churned up by a storm. The public trial stage became completely soaked in music, and the commune members standing below the stage were blanketed by snow-like music. Thirteen Li River was flooded with songs, and Chenggang was completely inundated. Everyone, for some reason, began to shout, but it was unclear whether they were celebrating, or were cursing because the event was going to be so short. Some were complaining that it had not been worth it for them to have come ten, twenty li or more, just for this! Hongmei and I were completely surrounded by and soaked in music. I saw that someone had taken the shoe on which he was sitting and thrown it into the air; and I saw a large crowd of people surging toward the riverbank (where we were going to be executed). Someone who looked like Cheng Tianqing was getting trampled by the crowd, whereupon he suddenly lifted his fist and began hitting people. I saw that Hongmei, hearing that spring shower of music, had managed to stand up without any help, and that the pallor that had covered her face had begun to melt away, replaced by a blush of excitement. As the music grew louder, lyrics fell to her feet like ripe fruit, and the excitement on her face was replaced by a deep-red agitation. She turned and looked at me through the gap between the soldiers’ shoulders, her gaze as bright as a torch. I knew that her blood, like mine, was surging through her body, and that her forehead was feverish with agitation and fear.

  I took a step toward her.

  She took a step toward me.

  We suddenly rushed past the soldiers standing between us and began frantically kissing. Because we were both still tied up, we weren’t able to embrace or caress each other. Instead, she pressed her chest against mine, and I pressed my shoulders against hers. We looked up at the sky over the stage, her lips squeezing mine were cold as fire, while my tongue grabbing hers was hot as ice. Revolutionary passion can melt a thousand layers of snow, and comradely love can melt ten thousand meters of ice. The sun comes up in the east and shines down on the four seas, as countless sunflowers bloom in its direction. Seedlings sprout under the spring rain, and they’ll never change color until the end of time. My heart, my flesh, my soul, my love …

  Heaven, oh heaven, oh heaven! Earth, oh earth, oh earth! At this moment, amid the madly broadcasting red music and revolutionary songs, the people standing below the stage suddenly grew silent. The people jostling their way to the other bank also suddenly turned around and fixed their gaze on the scene unfolding on the stage, staring intently at me and Hongmei. They stared at our affection, at our love, and at our revolutionary lips and tongues. The armed soldiers on stage stared blankly. After announcing the sentence, the judge appeared to be in a trance as he left the stage. The crowds standing beneath the stage continued staring intently. Even the specks of dust floating in the air came to a standstill. Meanwhile, the stones on the riverbank kept hopping up and down to try to see us kissing. The fish and crabs in the river happily leapt out of the water. My tongue played with Hongmei’s, while her wet lips engaged mine in battle. My shoulders pressed into hers like floodwaters against a levy, while her breasts pushed against my chest like a house bearing down on its support columns. Our affection shone brilliantly, and our love sparkled brightly …

  And just at that moment, just for that instant, there was a stillness that lasted perhaps a minute, perhaps a night, a day, or perhaps for centuries—or perhaps it was just a few seconds—and then revolutionaries pulled the trigger against other revolutionaries.

  They executed us not in the sandpit they had dug on the other riverbank but right there on the stage, before the echoes of the sentencing pronouncement had even faded. However, as our sacrificial blood was falling, Hongmei and I remained tightly stuck together, our lips interlocked, until finally the bloody smell smothered us.

  Death
is a common occurrence. Some deaths are as weighty as Mount Tai, others are as light as a feather. The revolution has not yet succeeded. Comrades, you must continue to struggle.

  4. Coda (IV)

  Many, many days later, Hongmei and I were permitted to return to the Balou Mountains from that “tender land.” We noticed that people everywhere were reading a novel called Hard Like Water, while illiterate people were relating stories about us. When we reached the riverbank west of Chenggang, where we had been executed, we discovered that the stage was no longer there, but the spot where our bloody bodies had fallen was now green and flourishing. In a patch of green vegetation, a group of boys and girls were cutting grass and watching their cattle graze, as they playfully explored each other’s private parts. Afterward, the children proceeded to strip naked and engaged in couple games like adults. An old woman with a hunched back and gray hair called out to them from the village, telling them to come home to eat. Therefore, the children had no choice but to hurriedly get up, put their clothes back on, grab their baskets, and herd the cattle back to the village.