Hers to Heal

by Vonnie Davis

  Elroy beamed. “Thanks, boss.”

  Ashley had whirled around, her mouth agape. “Are you really going to name her after me?”

  “Are you going to help Elroy take care of her? You’ll have to follow his orders.”

  Her face expressed happiness for the first time since he’d opened the door to the truck for her hours ago. “Oh, I’d love to. Elroy, I’ll do whatever you say. I don’t know anything about ranch animals, so you’ll have to be patient with me.”

  “I can do that. You just show me you’re willin’ to work hard.” He waved an open hand around the stables. “You see how clean this place is kept. Any horse apples dropped are scooped up right away. The cement floor scrubbed and hosed down.”

  “Horse apples?”

  “That’s horse shit to a city dweller like you.” ZQ shoved his hands in the front pockets of his jeans. This might be a damn good thing for the girl. Taking care of the colt would get her mind off herself and give her a sense of purpose. Help her heal.

  “I’ve got a lot to learn.” She had her head leaning against little Vogel’s Moon’s side. “But I will. Don’t you worry.”

  —

  ZQ could tell things hadn’t gone well between Mom and Ashley Vogel when his mother stormed into the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. She placed some homemade cookies on a plate and set it between her and ZQ. She and her scowl flopped onto a chair.

  He reached for a snicker doodle. “Gee, my favorite cookies. How’d you guess?” He shoved one in his mouth and chewed.

  She slapped the air near his arm. “Huh, as if I don’t know my baby boy’s favorites.”

  “Did you get Ashley settled in okay?” ZQ grabbed another cookie.

  His mom stirred a spoonful of sugar into her coffee, then took a sip. “Yes. Why on God’s green earth is she making herself out to be a man?” She broke a cookie in half and bit into it. “I told her to shower and pretty herself up before she came down for supper.” Fine crumbs fell off the cookie half she shook at ZQ. “If looks could kill, you’d be on the phone with McDaniel’s Funeral Home right now.”

  “We’ll give her two or three days to settle in. If she’s still rude, I’ll lay down the law.”

  “I’ll give her some space. Do my part to make her feel welcome, but I won’t abide a snooty attitude.” His mom sipped her coffee and brushed her hair off her forehead. “She wants more locks on the bathroom door, by the way.”

  ZQ nodded. “I’ll take care of it. She’s hiding from men, Momma. Afraid she’ll be attacked again. I told you how ISIS raped her. Sodomized her. I don’t know if she can ever respond to another man, and poor JJ is crazy about her. Has been since the day she arrived on our team’s base as our new translator. We may have a bit of a lover’s spat on our hands when JJ sees what she’s done to herself.”

  “Don’t you think you ought to warn him? Fudge and buttermilk, she looks like one of them Goth kids and a unisex one, at that!” She spun her coffee cup around the way she always did when she was worried about someone. “JJ and Nance went for a walk. The man reminds me of a cheap watch wound too tight.”

  “You’re right. He needs to be told. I’ll hunt him down as soon as I register the new filly. I was just resting my eyes from all that driving before I sat in front of the computer screen to fill out the registration forms.”

  “Put your glasses on, son.” She shot him the mother look.

  He stood, leaned, and kissed her upturned face. “I don’t need my momma to order me around.”

  He’d just set one booted foot into the living room when the ultimate command slapped his ears. “No. You need me to tell you how to romance a girl and make me a grandma. And not with that no-account Wanda, either.” His mother was set on having a grandchild. Her demands were growing stronger all the time.

  Just what kind of father would he make when his black ops team traveled to God knew where for weeks or months on end? There were no guarantees he’d make it back. No, he couldn’t saddle a wife and child with an unstable life like that.

  The sight on the sofa surprised him. Piper was curled against Reece, her little arms banded around his waist as if she was afraid he’d leave her while she slept. Reece’s head was flopped to the side, gentle snoring filling the room. Three books and a doll lay on the sofa next to him.

  ZQ snapped a picture of the drowsing duo with his cellphone and smiled. If anyone could bring Steelhead out of his silent world, it would be this little magpie. The kid could outtalk the town’s gossips—and Warrior Falls had some doozies.

  Chapter 8

  Gina nosed her SUV onto the dirt lane leading to Eagle Ridge Ranch, her nerves still on edge from her earlier interaction with Reece. If she didn’t have to pick up Piper, there’d be no way she’d return to the ranch today with the possibility of coming face-to-face with him so soon. She needed time alone to process what had happened this morning.

  She had no one to blame but herself. Her instant attraction to Reece a month ago combined with his constant brooding had pushed her over some weird emotional ledge she couldn’t explain. His unexpected affectionate behavior earlier had set her off-kilter. Before she’d gotten control of her wayward tongue, she’d damn near told him her darkest secret—and wouldn’t you know he’d guessed it?

  Her eyes narrowed and her fingers tightened around the gray steering wheel. His kiss was the reason for her weakening, for allowing her attraction to him to temporarily erase her firm hold on past pain, and for exhibiting her desires for this man.

  Not the first powerful kiss that silently demanded she submit. It had brought back too many horrific memories. No, it was the second, gentler, more sensual kiss. Or was it the sexy way his deep voice rasped “baby” when he held her tight? Her hormones on simmer since she’d first met Reece rolled to a rapid boil in 2.9 seconds. Much longer and she’d have ripped his jeans off to get some long-overdue satisfaction. What the hell happened to her in the span of one kiss, a few whispered words, and being secure in his embrace? She’d lost her damn mind, that’s what.

  She’d been over it repeatedly all day, her brain dissecting every emotion and response to one tall, handsome, and silent Reece Browning. She parked the car and leaned her head against the steering wheel. With any luck he’d be with the horses or out riding the range with JJ or Elroy.

  The scent of cherries cooking, almond, and vanilla wafted through the air when Gina walked into the kitchen. Junebug stood at the stove patiently stirring the mixture with a wooden spoon. “Hi, Gina darlin’, I’m making cherry tarts for dessert. The day got away from me and I didn’t have enough time left to bake two pies.”

  Gina kissed Junebug’s cheek. “I hope my chatterbox wasn’t too much trouble.”

  “Heavens, no. She helped me mix meatloaf. For fun, I had her put the mixture in cupcake tins and spread with ketchup icing.” Junebug winked. “She thought that was something special. Look.” The older woman opened the oven door to display the meatloaf cupcake pans. “We had to make a lot. The men’ll eat ’em in two bites.”

  “Where is she at now?” Gina knew all too well how quickly Piper could get into things she shouldn’t.

  “In on the sofa, sound asleep, snuggled up to Reece.” Junebug tipped her head toward the doorway as she began stirring the cherry mixture on the stove again. “Go take a peek. It’s the cutest sight.”

  Gina stuck her head around the corner to the sofa, her heart breaking at what she saw—her baby hanging on to Reece for dear life. Piper really wanted a daddy. Now that she was in school hearing all the other kids talking about what they were doing with their fathers, she felt left out, perhaps even unloved. Gina had never sugarcoated the situation even as she’d tried her best to shield her daughter from the truth. Piper knew her dad left them before she was born and Gina had no idea where he went.

  Reece opened his eyes and twisted his head from side to side, no doubt to work out the kinks from the way he’d been sitting. He glanced at her daughter and a smile of tenderness s
oftened the hardened planes and angles of his features. “Precious little Piper,” he whispered, “may the world treat you and your momma gently.”

  Gina pivoted against the kitchen wall to catch her breath and blink away tears. Who was this man? He was remote a good ninety percent of the time and yet with animals and her daughter, he appeared deeply caring the other ten. This morning when she’d fallen apart, he’d held her together with both passion and tenderness. Reece was one battle-torn enigma.

  Junebug removed the pot of cherries from the stove to cool. “Those two have hung out together most of the afternoon. Reece came into the kitchen to make a sandwich for lunch and Piper insisted on doing it. When he saw how important it was to her to make it, he sat and watched.”

  The older woman chuffed a laugh. “Fudge and buttermilk, that sweet child used four slices of bread. Wheat, white, rye, and raisin. Somehow she got mayonnaise on her chin, probably because she kept talking as she piled on the lettuce, tomato, and onion slices. Reece sliced those for her, said he didn’t want her pretty little fingers to get cut.”

  Junebug glanced up from sprinkling flour on her pastry board and grinned at Gina before rolling out dough for the cherry tarts. “Well, that little girl of yours slapped on three kinds of cheese slices, ham, roast beef, and turkey. By now she had mustard on her forehead.” Another giggle rolled out. “Reece sat with his hand over his mouth and his shoulders shaking. I thought he was going to bust a gasket trying not to laugh at her. Then Piper got into the pickle jar and land sakes, one slice got stuck in her curls right here.” Junebug pointed to the top of her scalp. “The sandwich resembled the Leaning Tower of Pisa, but she was so proud of it. Piper sat and watched Reece eat every bite.”

  “Best damn sandwich I ever ate.”

  Both women’s heads swiveled to Reece as he snagged two bottles of water out of the refrigerator, passing one to Gina. “She’s a sweet treasure. You’ve raised her well.” He opened his bottle and guzzled.

  Gina tried not to stare at the neck muscles working over his Adam’s apple. God help her, she wanted to run the tip of her tongue over those rippling muscles. She’d better shift to mother mode and in a damn big hurry. “I don’t hear her. Is she still sleeping?”

  He nodded. “Covered her with Junebug’s afghan.”

  ZQ tiptoed into the kitchen. “Steelhead, Gina, could you both come into my office? I sent a text to JJ. He’ll be here soon, too. I need to talk some things over with the three of you.”

  Reece nodded and stepped back to allow Gina to go first. She hadn’t known he could be so polite. The kitchen door opened and JJ barreled in, Nance at his heels. Reece placed his index finger over his lips. “Step quietly. Piper’s sleeping on the sofa.”

  JJ’s eyebrows rose and he nodded before grabbing a bottle of water, too. Nance went to her bowl.

  Gina always felt at home in ZQ’s office. Just like the former SEAL commander, it was huge and heavily masculine. Three brown leather sofas created a large U around a massive stone fireplace. A heavy square table sat in the center of the couches. ZQ’s immense wooden desk, flanked by a bar and wooden filing cabinets, occupied the other end of the room. The walls were painted dark blue. Military commendations hung between the three windows. A large TV was centered over the mantel covered with pictures of his parents, champion horses, and steers.

  ZQ plopped in the middle sofa, his arms spread across the back. JJ and Nance took a sofa and both she and Reece sat in the one remaining.

  “Gina, I went for another patient this morning. I’m sure you recall my mentioning our translator, Ashley Vogel. She’d been captured and tortured by ISIS.”

  “Yes. Do I need to add her to my physical therapy schedule? What injuries did she sustain?” She reached into the pocket of her scrubs for a piece of paper and pen.

  ZQ stared at her for a beat. “Emotional. But she’s going to need your help just the same.”

  “How so?” To her surprise, Reece’s pinky finger slid over and hooked around hers. Her stomach did a twitchy thing. Was he flirting with her while she was discussing a patient? Gina was very serious about her profession. One glance at his concerned, pinched features alarmed her. “What?” she whispered.

  Oblivious to her question for Reece, ZQ kept talking. “Before I tell you, Gina, I need to apprise JJ of Ashley’s current condition.”

  JJ leaned forward, his dreadlocks falling over his muscled shoulders, and his forearms over his thighs. “God, I’m almost afraid to hear, knowing how hellacious bad she was the last time I saw her.”

  ZQ sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. “Her blond hair is gone. It’s cut high and tight and dyed black. Her breasts are bound so she appears damn near flat-chested. She looks more male than female.”

  JJ wrapped his arms around Nance’s neck and the dog crawled onto his lap while the man buried his face into her fur. “Fuck it all, man, we should have insisted she come sooner. She needed us. Dammit all to hell, Ash suffered so much before we rescued her.”

  Gina’s stomach cramped. Dear God, the girl had been raped just like her—repeatedly, brutally raped. What else would account for the radical changes in her appearance? Gina’s breathing hitched and her arms and legs trembled. She closed her eyes, aiming for calm. A futile effort since memories of dark, menacing figures surfaced—groping hands removing her clothing, and vile behavior that cheapened her femininity. Reece’s hand covered hers and gently squeezed.

  I have to hold it together. I cannot fall apart. I have to protect my little girl.

  ZQ and JJ kept talking about Ashley in the background while buzzing filled Gina’s mind. Black spots floated before her. She practiced deep breathing techniques to keep the panic attack at bay. Although ZQ hadn’t voiced his demands, she had a gut feeling he expected her to help Ashley. The fragile, damaged part of her wasn’t having any of it. The part of her who lived to help others was a conniving bitch, trying to talk her into giving support to whomever she could, including Ashley.

  Lips feathered her ear. “Relax. I’ve got your six.” A calloused thumb brushed over her knuckles in slow circles meant to calm her.

  Her eyes eased open. Reece had spread his muscled thighs wide so no one could see he was holding her hand. No one had her back. Ever. If there was one painful thing she’d learned, the world was a cold, brutal, and lonely place. Thank God for her daughter and the satisfaction Gina got from helping others. Those two things were her happy zones.

  ZQ looked her way. “Back to you, Gina. I don’t know who all Ashley’s had to talk to about what happened to her in Syria. For all I know, no one. She needs the counsel of a woman.” His fingers linked behind his neck. “A woman who’s served her country just like Ashley did. One who understands the risks of going into enemy territory. You have a firm, yet tender way about you. I think she’ll respond to that.”

  “Ashley would respond better to a shrink, ZQ.” Reece leaned forward, pressing Gina’s trembling hand against the warmth of his thigh at the same time. “Someone who can teach her coping mechanisms. I’m going to need one myself. Gina’s great at what she does, but we don’t talk about the visions I see or the nightmares I have. That’s out of her zone of expertise. You’ll do both her and Ashley a disservice by throwing them together and demanding results. Especially when they’re virtual strangers who haven’t had the chance to build any trust.”

  ZQ stared at him, and then looked at JJ before pinning Gina with a shocked expression. “Have either of you heard this silent sombitch talk this much before? Because damned if I have. Not since he got here, anyhow.”

  “Kiss my ass, you big feeling bastard,” Reece growled.

  They all laughed, except for Gina. “He’s right, ZQ. I’d be no help to her.” Hell, don’t I feel like the self-centered bitch?

  ZQ’s eyes narrowed. “Ashley was one of my squad. Granted, she wasn’t a SEAL, but she was Navy, just like you were Marine. I expected more cooperation.” The censure was evident in his voice and it scraped across her hear
t.

  She stood and shuffled to a window, the weight of her past on her shoulders. Hugging herself, she looked outside, seeing nothing, feeling everything, and wishing she and Piper were in the safety of their little house. Alone. Coloring. Giggling. The loving team of mother and daughter.

  “Gina doesn’t need to decide right this instant, does she? Give her time. We need to remember counseling someone with deeply seated wounds like Ashley’s will wear emotionally on Gina. She has an active little girl to care for at night. Piper’s needs have to come first. Sounds to me like Ashley won’t be ready to open up to anyone for weeks, maybe months. Hell, ZQ, what she went through can’t be healed with a magic conversation. No more than mine can and I wasn’t raped. You can’t expect Gina to drain herself emotionally performing miracles during the day when she has her hands full at night as a single mom.”

  A sigh of gratitude shuddered from her lungs. Since when did her sullen, silent patient morph into her verbose champion?

  —

  Reece had no clue how else to help Gina out of this situation without giving away a private secret she’d yet to completely share with him—and might never. He did recognize a full-blown panic attack ready to surface. Hell, he’d had plenty himself. If he could save her from having one, he’d gladly force himself to talk.

  Of course, ol’ never-miss-a-trick ZQ wouldn’t disregard Reece’s sudden entrance into the land of the talking and caring. Not without a smart-ass comment.

  “When did the cat bring back your fuckin’ tongue?” The commander stood, his hands on his hips.

  Reece stood, too, and shot a glance at Gina. “You’re the second person to ask me that very question today. I’ll tell you the same thing I told Gina. Try spending five minutes with that curly blond chatterbox and see if you can keep silent.” He shook his head once. “Man, you shoulda seen Piper’s expression once she found out we both have the same middle name. She latched onto me as if I were the last Popsicle in the freezer.”