Cast in Sorrow

by Michelle Sagara

  “Within reason.”

  “I do not choose to expose it.”

  Kaylin shrugged. “Suit yourself. I can’t pick it out of your thoughts.”

  “If you wished to assert sovereignty, if you wished to exert power, you could.”

  “No, I can’t. I’ve had one enraged Barrani Lord hammering away at the inside of my skull for days now, looking for weaknesses. If I knew how to forget a name completely, believe that I would. I don’t. I have the energy—or the sense of self-preservation—to resist. I have nothing left over—at all—to start playing games with you.”

  “Kill him.”

  She’d given it serious thought because she was fairly certain she could. Not in a fair fight, but she could probably force him to stand still long enough to slit his throat. “I can’t.”

  “You won’t; they are not the same. In any other case, I would not counsel such a killing; in yours, there is no advantage to his survival. You will not use him.”

  “I won’t use any of you.” But Ynpharion wasn’t like the others.

  “No. Not yet. Perhaps not ever. Ynpharion will be called—and questioned—by the Council of the Vale. Listen to him when he answers if you will not force truth from him. You will know when he lies.”

  She thought of Ynpharion and exhaled sharply. “Ynpharion was a forest Feral when I found him. I don’t know if he could shift shapes, but it’s my suspicion he could: he could appear to be Barrani, and he could be—whatever it is you call them. But I’m not sure he chose to become what he became. He’d kill Iberrienne slowly if he found him; Iberrienne is the only person he hates more than he hates me.

  “He had to have agreed to whatever was done to him; I don’t get the impression that he was kidnapped and dragged to Iberrienne kicking and screaming. He allowed whatever happened. He would never allow it again. There’s something laid on them, over them—something that changes not only what they can be, but what they want.

  “But I swear he’d cut off his own head before he’d serve Iberrienne again in any way.” She hesitated. “Iberrienne wasn’t one of the lost children.”

  “No.”

  “But he was the one who attempted to destroy Orbaranne.” She paced for a bit. “I don’t understand where the children are, what they are, or what they want. I don’t understand what they attempted to even do with Orbaranne—if we assume they didn’t intend to just destroy her.

  “And I think we need to know.”

  “You will find that the Imperial Hawk does not confer either privilege or responsibility in the West March.”

  “No.”

  “I will not agree to your conditions, Lord Kaylin; I have no reason to do so. Were I to tell you everything, were you to understand the whole of my part in this tale, it would change nothing. You will do what you do. If I am Nightshade, you are Kaylin Neya. You have my name. If you wish change in the fief, use it. Try.” His smile was cutting.

  “And if you will not, when you are a Hawk and everything I do is a crime, ask yourself why. I am one man. Those who suffer under the neglect of my rule are multiple. You spend a life attempting to apprehend those who break Imperial Law; it is your highest duty. You have risked your life—you will no doubt continue to do so—in pursuit of imperfect justice. You have the means.

  “You are merely squeamish, Kaylin. It is a weakness.”

  “Yes,” she said, facing the water. “But I’m human.”

  “Are you?” He offered her an unexpected bow, and left her by the side of the water that had fallen without pause throughout their conversation.

  * * *

  She was silent. The small dragon was not. He didn’t generally seem to care for Nightshade, but tonight, he had remained flopped across both of her shoulders and the back of her neck, as if the conversation was trivial. Or boring.

  “Is he right?” Kaylin asked.

  She didn’t expect an answer, but the small dragon lifted his delicate head and rubbed it against her cheek.

  “Is it just because I’m squeamish?” She lifted her hands; they hovered above the water’s rippling surface. She hesitated for one long minute, and then let them fall to her sides. The Tha’alani feared and distrusted Kaylin’s people because they felt they were all insane—the outcome of living a life in the isolation of fear, anger, and ignorance.

  Tonight she was afraid, angry, and ignorant, and the Tha’alani didn’t deserve to be stuck with her thoughts. Or with her.

  But she frowned as she looked at the fountain and its base, because it was so familiar. She couldn’t change fear or anger tonight. But ignorance? Ignorance could be, as the Arkon said, alleviated. She walked around the fountain’s perimeter, pausing to kneel on flat stone to look at the underside of the basin. She had no light; all she could see was the general shape, and it was pretty much what she’d expect of a normal fountain.

  Tomorrow, then. She rose, brushed off her skirt with way more care than she’d brush clothing she actually owned, and headed back to her rooms.

  * * *

  Sleep was a problem.

  By the time she’d removed the dress and taken the bath that seemed to be expected, she’d made a list of things she needed to understand. She didn’t number the points, because the number shifted; she couldn’t be objective.

  She needed to understand Iberrienne.

  She was certain that the Human Caste Court believed his experiments might pave the way to immortality for the chosen—murderous—few, but people often heard what they wanted to hear. She didn’t believe it herself.

  But the Arcanum—or at least three of its members—had been involved. She would bet her own money that the other two had no idea of what Iberrienne had intended to do with all of his kidnapped mortals. They thought he intended something. They’d aided him, inasmuch as they could. They knew about the paths to the outlands. What had they been offered?

  They were Barrani. Barrani were less likely to hear what they wanted to hear—or at least less likely to trust it. None of the Barrani expected the full story when they negotiated, not even from their allies. So...they had to have suspicions. The suspicions had been wrong. No matter how Barrani intended to gain power—and they always did—planning the Consort’s death was outside the parameters of acceptable risk.

  What had Iberrienne showed them?

  She could understand how Iberrienne could reach the rest of the Barrani he’d likely ensnared; he was a member of the High Court. He could walk in—and out—without comment. How did he choose? Was choice even necessary?

  Argh.

  Iberrienne might have gone entirely undetected if he hadn’t tried to level the city block Kaylin lived in with his Arcane bomb. His reaction to Bellusdeo—to a female dragon—implied that he was, at heart, Barrani, no matter how much he’d changed. Unless the Dragons somehow presented a threat to the lost children, and Kaylin couldn’t see how that could be true.

  She was certain that Iberrienne was involved with the lost children. The transformed. But how? The Hallionne Alsanis was forbidden. But Kaylin had seen with her own eyes that the lost children weren’t trapped in the Hallionne. They weren’t trapped in the outlands, either. Terrano had approached Teela on the forest path, on land that was technically outside of the green.

  And of course, the end point of her worries, and the start of them, which kept her mind running on a narrow, visceral track: Why had the lost boy approached Teela? He had been—he had sounded—delighted to see her. Delighted, surprised. If the lost children had freedom of movement—or enough freedom to somehow contact Iberrienne, couldn’t they have contacted Teela on their own?

  What did they want from Teela?

  Why had Teela been part of the nightmare?

  Why had she shattered?

  She rolled over, and the small dragon smacked her nose with his tail. He generally slept just above her head on a pillow, the back of her neck being unavailable. She might as well give up on sleep. It wouldn’t be the first time she’d gotten almost none. She rose, dr
agged herself back into the dress that was the best armor—against Barrani—she’d ever wear, and headed out of the darkened room.

  * * *

  She found servants. One man and one woman. They hadn’t, from the look of it, been conversing the way she was certain mortal servants would. But they were doing something. Her arms began to itch as she approached them. She was glad, then, that she’d chosen to wear the dress.

  She was too tired to care much about tact or appropriate behavior. She wasn’t too tired to worry that Teela would be pissed at her. She left the ruder words out, which meant High Barrani as her chosen language of communication. “What are you doing?”

  Their eyes were blue. It was a darker shade of blue than the usual; there hadn’t been a lot of green in these rooms. The man bowed. “We are securing the room. Mortals sleep.”

  She really was in a bad mood. Everything made her suspicious. Even the explanation, which on the surface made sense. “No one is going to try to kill me—”

  “You do not wear the dress in your sleep, Lord.”

  She let her arms fall to her side, glancing at the layout of the hall. It was too narrow for sword work; daggers would be fine. But daggers against at least one mage? One Barrani mage? Toss-up.

  Teela could—and occasionally did—use magic. She didn’t use it often. Kaylin couldn’t offhand think of another Barrani Hawk who could. She’d wondered about it at thirteen—and for several years after—because the mages who came to the Halls were pompous men who considered the ability to use magic a gift that set them above the rest of the people who had to work for a living.

  Teela, however, was the only Lord to work as a Hawk. The rest of the Hawks—according to Teela—hadn’t taken the test of name. Kaylin had assumed, when she’d discovered Teela’s patrician background, that that was the difference. Maybe it hadn’t been. Maybe it was the test of name that somehow conferred that ability.

  The test of name seemed to be a bit of a political sore spot for the denizens of the West March. Kaylin couldn’t believe that men and women who had survived it would work as servants.

  The small dragon was sitting on her left shoulder, watching the servants. Watching Kaylin, as well. He didn’t seem to be concerned. Kaylin forced her hands to relax. These were Lirienne’s people. She recognized both of them; they hadn’t switched between shifts.

  But they weren’t normally servants. She was now certain of it. She exhaled. “Were you both born in the West March?”

  This caused them to exchange a glance, although they kept all expression off their faces. It was the woman who answered. “Yes.”

  “Have you ever traveled to the High Court?”

  “We have both made that pilgrimage. If you mean to ascertain whether or not we are Lords, we are not.”

  “Actually, what I want to know is whether or not you’re normally servants.”

  The woman’s eyes lightened; the man’s darkened. “We serve the Lord of the West March,” she said. “Servant has connotations in the High Halls that it does not in the West March. We are in the service of Lord Lirienne. It is he who decides what form that service takes, and where our specific talents are most needed.” She glanced at her companion. His eyes had not gotten any greener.

  “You spent more time in Elantra than your friend.”

  “I spent a great deal of time in Elantra,” she replied—in Elantran. “I will not ask you to return to your room, but I must warn you, there is some difficulty in the halls at the moment.”

  Kaylin glanced at the small dragon; he was staring at the door farthest from where the three stood.

  “What difficulty?” she asked, reaching uneasily for the daggers she always carried with her, although they weren’t in the usual place.

  The drawing of the daggers caused the man’s eyes to go all the way to midnight-blue. The woman’s were the more traditional “this is bad” color with which Kaylin was most familiar.

  “You are not to fight in that dress,” he said. “Lord Kaylin.” The title was clearly afterthought.

  “I’m not going to stand here and do nothing if—”

  “When,” the woman said, as the itchiness of Kaylin’s arms became a burning that spread across her entire skin. “Lord Kaylin, please retreat.”

  But the back of Kaylin’s neck was burning as she turned to look down the small hall. “I don’t think that’s going to help,” she said in Elantran. She added a single Leontine phrase. The small dragon’s claws did their usual attempt to burrow. He hissed.

  Kaylin didn’t even tell him not to breathe, because she could now hear the sounds of fighting in the hall beyond her rooms. She was surprised when he lifted his wings, because he didn’t attempt to fly; instead, he spread one until it covered her face.

  In theory, his body was translucent, not transparent. In theory.

  But this wouldn’t be the first time she’d looked at the world through the veil of his wings.

  “Lord Kaylin?”

  “There’s magic here,” was her flat reply. The woman spoke to the man. The man didn’t speak at all for one held breath. When he did, Kaylin didn’t catch the word; it was almost—but not quite—inaudible. She was certain it was a useful word—and this was only the second time in her life she’d heard someone Barrani use one.

  “Lord Kaylin!” the man shouted.

  Kaylin didn’t need the warning. Black streaks appeared on the back wall, growing in number as she watched. They looked almost like the streaks fingers put on cold windows in the Halls, but there was something about their shape and the way they appeared that implied clumsy, hurried writing.

  She couldn’t tell if what she saw was visible to the Barrani; she didn’t look back to see their reaction. She didn’t have to. The man pushed past her, moving to stand directly in front. The woman stayed where she was.

  Lirienne, what’s happening?

  No answer, but Kaylin could sense his presence. She was afraid to push for more than that because she knew he was fighting.

  Nightshade—

  We are under attack, he replied. He had no trouble fighting and talking, at least not this way.

  Yes, I guessed that—by what? The Ferals?

  The black on the wall—or what she could see of the wall through Barrani back—had darkened and spread. It no longer looked like writing; it reached ceiling and spread from the wall to the surface above; she was certain it was doing the same thing on the floor.

  Kaylin, what is happening?

  Look.

  At the moment, it is not feasible.

  There’s a large, black patch on the wall I’m facing, and it’s spreading. There’s magic here, and it’s growing; it is not a small spell.

  You are wearing the blood of the green?

  Yes. But...I didn’t notice that stopping the forest Ferals. I don’t think—

  Evarrim is down.

  She was silent for a full beat; even her thoughts failed. She found them again, quickly. Where is Teela? Can you see Teela?

  She is with me, the Lord of the West March replied. We are fighting our way to you now.

  Kaylin shook her head, although he couldn’t see it. I don’t think you’re going to get here in time.

  What Nightshade found inadvisable, Lirienne now did. He looked. It was an odd sensation; Nightshade’s touch was so unobtrusive she was largely unaware of it. Lirienne’s was not; she had to fight the instinctive urge to push him back.

  He slid away again. Kaylin almost told his servants that he was on his way, but managed to shut her mouth before stupid words escaped them. They’d only wonder how she knew, and the answer was so not public information.

  She reached out, caught the Barrani man by the shoulder, and pulled him back; he allowed it. “What do you see?”

  He ignored the question. To the woman, he said, “We take the front door.” He lifted his arms, held them, palms out, in front of him as he continued to back down the hall.

  The small dragon squawked.

  “Yes,�
�� Kaylin told him. “Buy us whatever time you can.”

  He flew. He flew past the Barrani man who’d inserted himself as a shield between Kaylin and whatever was forming in her apartments. She turned toward the Barrani woman and headed away from the growing darkness. She stopped when she reached the door, and grabbed the woman, in much the same way she’d grabbed her partner.

  The woman froze instantly.

  “Not a good idea,” Kaylin said, her voice muted. It was true—she could hear the sounds of fighting. She could hear—and this was worse—the guttural roar of an angry beast, and in the depths of that rumble, syllables. But she could feel magic, and it was the wrong magic; it was too strong, too familiar.

  Lirienne! Don’t come down the hall—my door is trapped!

  “Is there any other way out of this apartment?” Kaylin demanded.

  The woman didn’t even hesitate. She nodded.

  “We need to leave. Someone’s sketched an Arcane rune on my door, and I think it’s going to go off if the Lord of the West March comes anywhere near it.” Her legs ached and the back of her neck felt rubbed raw.

  “Gaedin,” the woman said.

  Kaylin looked down the hall. The shadows had spread, inching their way across the floor as if—as if they were the shadows contained in the heart of the fiefs.

  He nodded. “We will not have much time,” he told her.

  The small dragon squawked.

  “We’re leaving,” Kaylin told him. She didn’t reach for him, because he was now flapping in front of Gaedin’s face. He was facing the back wall.

  “Leave him,” Kaylin told the Barrani servant as he reached—with some reluctance—for the small dragon’s hind legs. “There’s nothing here that can hurt him.”

  He didn’t argue. He did take the lead; the woman surrendered it without hesitation. Which was good; he didn’t attempt to head into the bedroom or out the arch that was diagonal from it, and those were the only two possible exits Kaylin could see.

  Instead, he began to descend through a patch of floor—without lifting it first.

  This did not, on the other hand, make Kaylin’s skin feel any worse, although considering the exit and the end of the hall, she might not have noticed anyway. There must be stairs, given his movements.