The Sunburnt Country

by Palmer, Fiona

  ‘I don’t know. I’m not sure what I want.’ Actually he was sure but she was too far out of reach. ‘What would I do?’

  ‘Whatever you want. Whatever makes you happy. What does make you happy?’ Cam asked curiously.

  ‘Jonelle,’ Dan replied.

  ‘That girl you couldn’t stop talking about from that town you were in?’

  Dan laughed. ‘Yeah, that one. I can’t stop thinking about her.’

  ‘Maybe it’s love. Maybe you should go and give it a try, otherwise you might regret it your whole life. You can always get another bank job if things don’t work out. It’s not the end of the world.’

  That made Dan grin. ‘But if I go back there what will I do?’

  ‘Does it matter? Dan, you can do whatever you want. Don’t pigeonhole yourself. Think outside the square. What things do you like doing? What gives you the greatest joy?’

  Dan’s chest had swelled with pride and love. Cam had turned out to be such a strong, reliable and caring man, and Dan wondered how different he might have been if he hadn’t gone with his father all those years ago and if he had been raised by Derek and Denise instead.

  ‘I don’t care what you do, big bro, as long as you stay in touch. It’s nice having a brother around again. I’ve missed you.’ Cam bumped his shoulder against Dan’s.

  Dan watched the next heat of cars drive out onto the track and slapped his hand on his leg. ‘Productions. These ones, these are what she races,’ he told Cam as the cars lined up. Dan enjoyed the racing but felt as if it was missing something and he knew exactly who that was.

  His body zinged with nerves. Was this a good idea? Dan rode the elevator to the top of the imposing building. As the doors rattled open, he stepped towards the lady behind the corner desk. ‘Hi, Lynette. How are you?’

  Lynette looked over the top of her black-rimmed glasses. Her silver-streaked hair was cut short, not a strand out of place. ‘Daniel. It’s been a while. Gosh, you look so brown.’

  Dan smiled. ‘A bit of the bush sun will do that to you. Is John free?’ he asked.

  Lynette glanced across to the large phone, lights lit across the top. ‘Sorry. He’s still on his call. Can I make you an appointment?’ Lynette had her fingers poised at the keyboard.

  ‘Um, no. I might just wait, if that’s okay.’ Dan turned and sat on one of the grey chairs against the wall. He felt like he was waiting for an interview instead of a quick visit with his dad.

  ‘He shouldn’t be much longer,’ said Lynette, before turning back to her typing.

  Dan clenched his hands together as his left foot began to bounce. He hadn’t been looking forward to this at all. Could he live back out there full-time? He already knew the answer to that. There was something alluring about the vast sunburnt country and wide-open skies of Bundara, and the people. Especially the people. One in particular. He’d made the decision late Saturday night after he’d got back from the motorplex with Cam. He’d realised he cared more for Jonelle than he cared for his job. He thought back to the last time he’d seen her, when she’d asked him to stay. His heart had wanted to but his mind had said he had a new job to get back to. But after being with his family and talking with Cam, Dan worked out what meant the most to him. Right now he needed to know if he and Jonelle could make it work. Cam was right, he would regret it if he didn’t. He was sure she was the one.

  ‘Dan,’ Lynette called, tearing him from his thoughts. ‘He’s free now.’

  Dan stood and headed to his father’s door. ‘Thanks, Lynette.’ He knew he must have looked a little panicked.

  Dan knocked, then opened the door. ‘John?’

  John dropped his pen and sat up. ‘Daniel. Come in, come in. Sit.’ Dan sat in the chair opposite his father’s oak desk. ‘To what do I owe this pleasure?’

  Dan cringed. It wasn’t going to be a pleasure for long. Clearing his throat and willing himself to stop wringing his hands, he sat forward. ‘Um, I just thought I’d let you know before you heard it from anyone else that I’ve handed in my resignation.’

  John didn’t move an inch. The lines on his face remained motionless. But his steel-grey eyes flickered with something that looked like disapproval, or was it confusion? Dan still couldn’t figure out his father.

  ‘When?’

  Dan expelled a deep breath. ‘This morning.’

  ‘I see,’ he said, leaning back in his chair. ‘There might be time to stop it still. Why would you do a thing like that, Daniel? Especially without consulting with me first.’

  Now the tirade came.

  ‘We’ve worked long and hard at this, building you up, all for what? For you to just throw it away on a whim? What the hell has got into you? You just got this job, for God’s sake!’

  Dan chose his words carefully, mindful of not making things worse, and decided the truth was his best option. ‘Well, I’ve come to realise that this job’s not really for me. Actually, sending me out to Bundara was the start of it all. I feel like I discovered my true self out there, and coming back here just doesn’t feel right. I’ve fallen in love with a girl —’

  ‘This is over a girl?’

  A long blink, a pulse of his jaw. Dan was struggling to read him.

  ‘Jesus Christ! A few months out in the bush and now this? You can’t be serious? Over a woman? I’ll ring and get your resignation letter cancelled before it’s even processed.’

  ‘No.’ Dan stood up, defying his father for the first time. He realised now that everything had been smooth between them because he’d always done whatever it was his father had asked of him, at home and at work. It had always been easier that way but now he didn’t want easy. Maybe this was what his mum had gone through, too.

  Here we go, thought Dan as he readied himself for what he had to say. ‘Listen, I’m doing this because it’s what I want. I need to see if we can make it work. Love is more important right now than a job. It’s time to make myself happy. Dad, there is more to life than work.’ Dan decided to throw it all on the line. ‘I’ve been back in touch with Mum.’

  John’s face flickered but he managed to keep his emotions hidden.

  ‘I spent all these years thinking my own mother didn’t want me, when really you told her to stay away.’ John opened his mouth but Dan continued, cutting him off. ‘No, I understand you were hurting and angry but it was wrong to deny me my mother and she’s not the only one to blame in this. You have been so focused on your job that it’s always been your priority. My childhood has more special memories of Uncle Darryl in it than you. I love you, Dad, but this,’ Dan gestured around him, ‘is not a life. Did you know Cameron is going to be a father?’ He was glad to see the surprise in John’s face. ‘He’s got all that, and now it’s my turn. I want that for me, not a life spent in an office and meetings. I want to push my kids around in their homemade racing car, I want to be there at their birthdays, and I’m going to be the best husband and father I can be. That is what I want more than this career. And my one chance of that is in Bundara.’ Dan sucked in a breath, trying to keep his shaking at bay.

  John hadn’t moved, and Dan wasn’t sure his dad had heard what he had said. Did it even penetrate? Did he not care about what Dan said?

  ‘So . . . what? You’re moving back to this town?’ John’s voice was steady.

  ‘Yes, that’s the plan.’

  John leaned forward, his arms crossed on his desk. ‘And nothing I say will change your mind?’

  ‘No. I’m sorry, John. I know you wanted me to move up the ranks to be like you, but I’m not you. I’m me. I need to do something for myself.’ John flinched as if his son had slapped him. ‘You’re welcome to come and visit,’ Dan continued. ‘You might actually enjoy it.’ It didn’t hurt to ask, right? Dan thought.

  Without warning, John stood and walked towards him. ‘I can get them to put you on leave for a few weeks until you’re certain, if you like?’

  ‘I won’t change my mind,’ he said.

  ‘I hope for your sake it
works out.’ John paused for a moment, his fingers twitching, which was unusual for his father. ‘How is . . . your mother?’ It was barely audible.

  ‘She’s great. Very happy and looking forward to being a grandmother.’

  John nodded and the look in his eyes was sad and regretful.

  ‘You can have that too, Dad. I hope you find it.’

  Dan headed to the door, pausing with his hand on the frame. ‘I’ll call you soon.’

  He saw John nod. ‘That would be nice.’

  They shared a glance in the quiet, full of hope and promise for the future of their relationship. It’s all Dan could have asked for.

  Chapter 39

  JONELLE flopped back on her bed, still in her bright work clothes, her heavy-booted legs hanging over the edge. Tucking her hands behind her head, she closed her eyes and tried to relax after a long day on her feet. Daniel was the first thing to come to mind. Had he forgotten about her already? She itched to text him, just something simple like ‘How are you settling in?’ or ‘How’s the new job?’ but what if he didn’t reply? She’d be gutted. Why torment herself trying to maintain contact? It would do nothing but bolster the feelings she was trying to quell.

  At least the crazy hours at the mine helped and she didn’t have the constant reminders of him that she had in Bundara. That was something to be thankful for. Work was pretty good and she didn’t mind the five-thirty to eighteen-hundred-hour shifts. Being a country mechanic she was used to long and weird hours. The amount of times she’d had farmers call up at midnight or three in the morning because their tractors had broken down during seeding or they’d staked a tyre on the seeder bar. It was part of the job. She did those hours because that’s what was needed and she knew just how important it was for the farmers, they had to make the most of their time. It was also why she had such loyal customers, ones she felt she was letting down by having to close her workshop. But they all said they’d manage without her. Actually, they were very supportive. Wayne, one of her regulars, had said he’d rather her save her workshop now so she was ready to start work once this drought broke. He was adamant it would be raining in a few weeks, he could tell because the ants at his place were going mad. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if he was right?

  But in the meantime, hanging out here was okay. She was pretty confident around the mine workshop now, and her boss, Jacko, was easygoing. He had a daughter her age so he treated her well. And Craig, one of the other mechanics who had just recently married and who she worked the most with, was a barrel of laughs. His only problem was barracking for a Victorian football team, which just didn’t cut it. Jonny teased him about being a traitor to his state and Jacko would weigh in if he was around. Then there was Jimmy, who’d come from over east to work and had never been to WA before. They would often talk about where they were from and the places they’d holidayed at or the pubs in the city they liked the most, and Jimmy would be totally clueless. Craig got him a map of WA so every time they were talking about a new place they could point it out to him. The map was pinned up on the wall and now had smears of grease all over it. Jonny often found herself looking at the tiny dot of Bundara and then following the path all the way to Perth. If she went to Perth she felt that she’d be changing who she was. Everything about her was built from the friends, family and community of Bundara. She felt like she wouldn’t be the same person if she moved, and that change scared her. Coming to the mine was bad enough; the only thing getting her through it was heading home at the end of each stint.

  But the workshop here was becoming familiar, even though it was so different to her small one back home. The large shed could often be filled with trucks, buses, graders, generators, pumps, compressors and other stationary engines, and it was a delight to work on such an array of machines and motors. Talk about getting the mind ticking over again.

  This week they’d been busy fixing up one of the buses, which had a problem with its ignition timing. All the buses had to have regular services due to constant problems like dust getting in fuel filters. The workshop had supplies for just about every diesel, petrol and gas-powered vehicle. Jonny wished she had the money to keep stock like this in her workshop, instead of waiting for things to be shipped down through the courier or by post.

  But they weren’t always confined to the shed, things could break down anywhere on the mine site. Jonny loved getting the call-outs, it gave her a chance to see the mine and hopefully catch a glimpse of Ryan.

  She was just starting to think about getting up and having a shower when there was a loud bang on her door.

  ‘Yeah?’

  The door opened and Ryan’s face peered in. ‘Hey, you. What’s happening?’

  She sat up. ‘Bugger all. You?’

  ‘Same, same.’ He came in and parked his backside on her bed. ‘Wanna come over to my room later and watch a movie?’

  ‘Nah, man, I’m just about movied out. Wanna play some cards instead? I won’t be long outta bed, I reckon.’

  ‘Yeah, me too. Thank God I’m going home in a few days.’

  Jonny frowned at him. ‘Tease. I wish I could go with you.’

  ‘Well, I’m working on that. I’m gonna see if I can take extra time off so we can come back together and share a ride.’

  ‘Really? That would be cool.’

  ‘So have you heard from Zac or Renae lately?’ Ryan asked, as he bent over to loosen his bootlaces.

  ‘Yeah, Nae called yesterday. You know, I don’t think they even miss us. Seriously, those two hooking up has just about made the rest of us non-existent. They get to spend all their precious time together without having to split it with us.’

  Ryan chuckled. ‘You feeling a bit left out, precious?’

  Jonny frowned. ‘Maybe.’ If she had her own boyfriend then she wouldn’t, but how could she think about moving on and trying to find someone else when she didn’t want anyone except the clean-shaven, cologne-scented man with the handsome face and the flirtatious smile that turned her insides into a quivering mess.

  Ryan must have seen her faraway look because he sighed and slapped her leg. ‘C’mon, get cleaned up and you’ll feel better.’ He smiled and his rugged features softened. It made him look less like a wild man from the bush, even with his hair full of dust and poking out like it had a tonne of hairspray holding it up at uncoordinated angles.

  ‘Thanks, Coop.’ At least she still had her best friend.

  Chapter 40

  ‘WHAT do you think she’ll say when she sees you after a month? Maybe she’s moved on,’ said Cam.

  ‘Cameron!’ Denise warned. ‘Don’t torment the poor guy.’ Denise rolled her eyes and stood next to her eldest son. ‘It’ll be fine, Daniel. I’m sure it’ll all work out. You’ll come back and visit?’

  Dan clutched her hand in his. ‘Of course, Mum. And will you guys come and visit me when I get settled in?’

  ‘Yep, any excuse for a road trip.’ Cam smiled. ‘I’d love to see this old workshop you keep talking about. Classic.’

  ‘But I’ll have to be back in February. Can’t miss all the fun of Valentine’s Day,’ Dan said, teasing his brother back.

  ‘Mum, would you stop telling everyone! It’s supposed to be a surprise,’ Cam said, throwing his arms up.

  ‘It’s only us that know,’ added Denise, looking forlorn as they stood saying their goodbyes.

  ‘I think it’s nice you’re making an honest woman of Myree,’ said Dan.

  ‘It will be your turn next.’

  Dan sighed, tucking his hands deep into his jeans pockets. He had his workboots on that he got from the Baxters and they felt good. He’d also bought some casual T-shirts like the plain grey one he wore now. ‘Who really knows? I can’t wait to surprise her. I was nearly going to tell Zac I was coming back but he can’t keep a secret this big. He’s shocking. So I’ll just surprise them both. I just hope that when I get there she’s still interested.’

  ‘Doesn’t matter if she’s not. You’ll be there long enough to c
hange her mind,’ said Cam.

  Dan threw his hand up, striking Cam on the head gently like he used to as a teenager. Dan laughed to hide his growing worry. What if Jonelle didn’t want him any more? What if she had found someone else? Could she? In a month? Come tomorrow, he’d know for sure.

  ‘Well, I’ll call you both lots. Say goodbye to Derek for me,’ he said, hugging his mum and then shaking Cam’s hand. Cam liked to pull him in and slap his shoulder, a manly hug. Dan liked his brother’s open affection.

  ‘And I’ll call you too, Dan. I promise.’ Denise had tears lining her lower lids and Dan knew then that nothing would stop, could stop, his mum from staying in contact. It touched him deeply.

  ‘All right, I’d better go. Talk to you later.’ With a wave he headed to his car.

  As he left the city suburbs his phone rang. He answered it through the car’s Bluetooth.

  ‘Daniel?’ His father’s voice echoed around the inside of the car. ‘Have you left yet?’

  ‘I’m just heading out of the city now,’ Dan replied. He hadn’t heard from his father since he’d left his office. He held his breath.

  ‘Oh, okay. Um . . .’ Dan had never heard John so unsure of what he wanted to say. This man stared down boardrooms full of men who wanted his job and yet here he was stumbling on the phone to his son. ‘I just wanted to say goodbye. And . . . and to wish you luck.’

  The road ahead went blurry as Dan’s eyes dampened. ‘Thanks, Dad,’ he almost squeaked. ‘That means a lot.’ Coming from his dad it meant more than a lot. It meant more than John would probably understand.

  ‘All right, um . . . safe trip. I’ll see you soon.’

  ‘Yep. I’ll see you soon,’ he repeated. Pressing the disconnect button Dan smiled to himself as he blinked rapidly. It was a great day. His grin grew at the thought of driving back to Bundara. He pictured the long straight road into town and that large blue sky. It felt like he was going home. And Jonelle would be there waiting for him.