Locked Away (Living With Lies Book 2)

by Riann C. Miller

  “Aunt sounds great to me,” Isabelle says before glancing over at me.

  “Have you guys decided on any names yet?” Kate asks.

  My eyes remain locked with Isabelle’s as she shakes her head. “Honestly, I haven’t thought that far ahead yet. I know I don’t have that long before he’s going to be here but everything has happened so fast.”

  Kate gives Isabelle a sad smile. “I’ll do anything you need me to, including babysitting.”

  “Hey now,” Gavin says, faking annoyance.

  “Me too,” Callie adds, causing everyone to laugh.

  I love my brother and I always will, but being here, surrounded by this group of people, is more family than I ever expected to have.

  Isabelle

  “You don’t have to babysit me,” I tell Alex. Kiran is currently at work—something the two never do at the same time.

  “I know I don’t have to,” he says, rolling his eyes. “Today, I’m multitasking...I asked a woman I’m...kind of seeing to come over.” My eyes widen with shock. I had no idea Alex was dating.

  “I’m such a shitty sister. All we do is talk about my problems.” I frown. “Not anymore. Tell me about this woman you’re dating.” I can’t help but smile.

  “For starters, calm down. It’s nothing...serious ...” he trails off with a shrug. He rubs his hands over his face. “She wasn’t thrilled when I first called her. I guess disappearing for over three weeks isn’t looked on too favorably, but she seems to have forgiven me.”

  My heart sinks. “God, Alex, I’m sorry.” I hate how my life bleeds into everyone around me.

  “Hey, you’re my sister. You mean the world to me, and if Brooke wants to hold a grudge, then so be it, but that doesn’t appear to be the case.” Alex glances down at his watch. “I’m going to take a shower before she gets here.”

  I smirk. “Thank goodness. I thought I smelled something.”

  Alex shakes his head with a smile. “Jerk,” he mumbles with a laugh on his way to the bathroom.

  I missed out...we both missed out on this kind of bond when we were kids, and I’m grateful we have the opportunity to make up for lost time.

  I grab the remote and start flipping through the channels as a knock comes from the door. I hit mute on the TV but I can still hear the shower running. I walk over to the door and look through the peephole to find a beautiful brunette standing on the other side.

  I open the door slightly. “Brooke?” I question.

  “Yes?” She tilts her head as her eyes narrow.

  I pull the door the rest of the way open. “Come in.” As she steps inside, she watches me closely. “I’m Isabelle. Alex’s sister.”

  She places her hand over her chest and chuckles. “Oh. Gosh. That would have been awkward.”

  “Yeah. Come sit down. Alex is in the shower,” I tell her as I take my usual seat. “So...how long have you been dating my brother?”

  Her nose scrunches. “I met Alex a couple of months ago. We see each other a lot, but we’re not officially dating,” she says, repeating practically the same thing Alex said.

  “When he went a few weeks without calling or texting me, I thought it was over, but I guess not,” she adds with a shrug.

  “That’s actually my fault. I don’t know if he said anything to you or not, but I had some problems and he unexpectedly left town to help me out.”

  “That’s what he said. Did his roommate leave, too? Because he quit calling my friend about the same time.”

  My heart drops as I swallow down the lump in my throat. “Yes, he did.” My voice is barely a whisper.

  “Oh good. I was wondering. Kiran quit answering Kami’s calls about the same time Alex stopped returning mine. Kami tried to convince me they were just users, but ...” She shrugs with a soft smile, having no idea she just turned my world upside down.

  “Are you okay? You look a little flushed.”

  I stand up, nodding my head as her eyes lock on my stomach. “I’m fine. Just pregnant and tired,” I say as Alex walks in the room.

  “You’re early.” He looks at Brooke with a huge smile on his face.

  “Sorry. I got off work early and I decided to surprise you,” Brooke explains.

  “I’m going to lie down,” I announce.

  “Okay. Brooke and I will wait until Kiran gets home to leave,” he says, telling me what I already know.

  I nod my head and walk to Kiran’s bedroom. Once the door is shut, tears start to fall.

  I left Kiran, and at the time, I had no intentions of returning. I can’t fault him for moving on, but he told me he hadn’t. He told me I was all he could think about, which clearly isn’t the case.

  I don’t doubt the fact that Kiran likes me, but I do doubt that he would be with me now if I wasn’t pregnant. If I allow him to stay with me because he feels obligated, then I’m setting him up to become his father, and that’s something I refuse to do.

  ****

  Exhaustion sets in but I never fall asleep. Sometime later, I hear the front door open when Kiran comes home. The three of them carry on a conversation I can’t quite hear. Then I hear the door open again. I’m assuming this time it is Alex and Brooke leaving.

  Kiran opens his door and slips inside his bedroom. I left the light off, leaving the room almost dark. Kiran strips off his clothing then slips into the bed, pulling me tight against his chest. Several long minutes pass before his breathing evens out and he drifts off to sleep.

  As the night passes, I barely sleep. All I can think about is Kiran and his friend Kami. I even roll my eyes when I realize how their names sound together. When the sun finally comes up, I give up on sleep and go to the kitchen. I desperately want a cup of coffee, even though my doctor told me to avoid caffeine. Instead, I pour a cup of juice and sit down at the kitchen table.

  I don’t want to be here—at least in this apartment—pretending life with Kiran is picture perfect. How did I let myself ever start believing that in the first place?

  “There you are,” Kiran says, rubbing his eyes and yawning as he walks into the kitchen. He kisses me on the cheek before walking over to the fridge and pouring himself a cup of juice. When I was given a list of foods to avoid, Kiran told me that he wouldn’t eat or drink them, either. At the time, I thought it sweet. Now, it feels like another thing he’s been forced to give up on my behalf.

  “Why are you up so early?” I sigh and shrug my shoulders. “Hey, none of that. Tell me what’s wrong. Are you feeling okay?”

  I can hear the concern in his voice and I hate it. I don’t hate Kiran, but I suddenly hate everything I’ve done to him. Everything I’ve forced him to give up, everything I’m forcing him to do.

  “I was thinking about seeing if Kate was okay with me staying with her.” I look down, refusing to look him in the eyes. “She has more room and that way the baby would have his own room. At least, until I figure something else out.”

  “What the fuck is going on, Isabelle?” Kiran growls, suddenly sounding very awake. I look up to find his angry eyes staring down at me.

  “I think it’s best we stop pretending,” I whisper.

  “Pretending?” he repeats, sounding shocked.

  “Yes. Pretending,” I challenge. “This isn’t a fairy tale, and even if it was, I’m not the kind of girl who gets a happy ending.” He stands there staring at me as his eyes narrow in disbelief.

  “Look,” I say as my voice cracks. “We don’t have to be a couple to raise our son.” A tear slips out as I try my best to push down the pain. “We’re adults. We can get along for the sake of our child.” Kiran shakes his head and drops his shoulders, looking rattled. Without saying a word, he walks back to his room then out the front door a few minutes later.

  I sit at the table for a few minutes, processing the last twelve hours. I love Kiran. I love him too much to trap him in a life he’s spent years avoiding.

  I grab my cell phone—the one Kiran bought for me after I returned to Denver—and send Kate a te
xt, asking if she’d come get me. I change my clothing and pack what little I have, and almost twenty minutes later, Kate and Gavin are at the door.

  “Where’s Kiran?” Gavin asks, but again I shrug in response.

  “Is it okay if I go back to your house?” I ask, looking at Gavin—who I expect is worried about Kate spending too much time with me.

  “Sure,” he says before glancing around our empty apartment.

  The ride to Kate’s is done in silence. When we get to their house, it dawns on me Callie’s not with them. “Where’s Callie?”

  “She stayed over with a friend.” Kate looks at me with concern. “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong?”

  I look between Kate and Gavin, and I force myself to smile. “I gave him the out he deserved,” I tell them.

  “What are you talking about?” Kate questions.

  “Did you know he was dating someone else before he left to find me?” Kate’s eyes flash as Gavin turns away, which tells me everything I need to know.

  “I’m not going to be that woman. The one who traps a guy into marriage and a family then gets mad when he hates the life he’s living.”

  Kate gives me a sad look. “Isabelle, I don’t think—”

  “Is it okay if I go upstairs and rest?” I ask, ending our conversation.

  “Yeah. Sure,” Kate says, looking over at Gavin.

  “Thank you.” I pause. “For everything,” I add before turning and walking up the stairs and into my old room. I rub my hands over my bump. “I guess for now, it’s just you and me, kid.” This isn’t the ending I was hoping for, but it’s the ending I originally expected.

  Kiran

  My phone continues to blow up as I sit in some hole in the wall bar, drinking at eleven in the morning. It’s not even noon, but after I left the apartment, I didn’t know where else to go. I desperately needed to calm down before I did or said something that caused whatever setback I have with Isabelle to become permanent.

  I drove around for a while, trying like hell to figure out what the hell went wrong, but I came up empty. When I spotted a bar with an open sign, I pulled in. The bar serves lunch, which is what most of the customers are ordering, but not me. I’m on my second beer.

  My phone buzzes again and this time I take a glance and see it’s Gavin. I scroll through the messages he’s left, asking me where the hell I am, except the last one.

  Gavin: She knows about Kami. She thinks you were dating her and that she screwed things up for you.

  My mouth drops open as I dial his number.

  “Where the fuck are you?” Gavin growls into my ear.

  “I’m...out,” I say, not willing to admit I’m drinking in a bar this early in the day. “What the hell do you mean she knows about Kami? There’s nothing to know,” I say as my voice continues to rise.

  “Dude, you know how women are. I didn’t ask a whole lot of questions. Kate tried and that’s what I heard her say. I knew you went out with this Kami chick and you never mention what did or didn’t happen, but I can tell you Isabelle thinks this woman meant something more than she did.”

  “I didn’t tell her about Kami because there was nothing to tell. How the hell did she find out about her in the first place?” I groan in frustration.

  “I don’t know, but not telling her wasn’t a great idea,” he snaps.

  “Okay. I’ll go home and talk to her,” I add, already walking to the door.

  “She’s here.” His comment causes me to stop. “Tell me you went and got her because if she took a cab, so help me—”

  “We picked her up,” Gavin answers, cutting me off.

  I breathe out a sigh. “I’m on my way,” I add before hanging up.

  I’m not going to let a woman I didn’t even like stand in between me and the woman I love. Shit, why does Isabelle have to be so damn polite? She wouldn’t even tell me why she was upset because she was positive I needed a damn out.

  I hop in my car with the urge to both strangle and kiss the hell out of her. When I pull out onto the street, I take my time driving to Gavin’s. I’m not drunk, but with two beers and no food in my system, I don’t want to take the risk of being pulled over. By the time I arrive at Gavin’s, almost thirty minutes have passed. After living here for months, this house still feels like home. For that reason, I put my code in the security system and walk in without knocking.

  Kate glances up from her schoolbooks in front of her with an annoyed expression. “I take it Gavin called you?” she says, shaking her head.

  “Yes, he did. I wish you would have.” I can’t hide my frustration.

  “Kiran, she’s upset and... pregnant. She wanted to lie down and rest so I gave her what she asked.” I can tell Kate is upset.

  “Kami means absolutely nothing to me,” I state as anger seeps into my words.

  Kate sighs. “Yet you went out with her...several times, right before you left for Mexico. To make matters worse...you didn’t tell Isabelle about it.” I swallow and do my best to push down my own feelings and think about how this must look to her.

  When we first came home to the apartment, she asked me if there had been anyone else. I told her no and that wasn’t a lie. “I’m going up to talk to her.”

  I turn and take the steps two at a time. I make it to the room Isabelle is in and pause. What I say or do next could very well change my life. She’s scared and pregnant by the first man she was with. She lived the last six months in hell, running from one place to the next only to have me sweep in, ready to play the hero and daddy all in one breath. I need Isabelle to know I’m with her because there’s no one else I’d rather be with.

  Without knocking, I slowly push the door open and find her curled up in a ball in the middle of the bed. She’s facing the door and her eyes lock with mine as I walk in and sit on the edge of the bed.

  I nervously run my hands through my hair and take a deep, calming breath as I glance at the wall. “I knew I used women. I didn’t even try to lie to myself. I’m sure if I tried a little harder, I could have found women who were okay with what I had to give, but I didn’t care. I planned to get what I wanted then I’d leave. To me, it didn’t matter if I hurt them because I wouldn’t be around afterward. But ...” I exhale another breath. “It started to bother me. I got a glimpse into the hurt I was dishing out and the guilt set in. I stopped going to bars and seeking out women a couple of months before we moved to Denver, and I promised myself if I didn’t have what it took to at least be completely honest with a woman, then I wouldn’t do anything else with them.” I pause to look over at her. I expect to see a disgusted look, but she appears concerned...concerned for me.

  “We barely got unpacked when you showed up at our door. My first thought was: God has to be punishing me, making me live in a house with a woman as gorgeous as you. I tried to make it my goal to be an ass to you. To make sure you knew the real me, but that kept backfiring because every time I was a jerk, I saw the look on your face and it gutted me. I didn’t want to be that man, either. The more I was around you...the more my guard went down, and I started seeing the real you.” Her eyes flash as she sits up. I can see her out of the corner of my eye. She’s watching me without saying a word.

  “You ended up being nothing like the woman I imagined, and every time you stood up to me, I found myself liking you even more.” I turn and lock my eyes with her beautiful but sad brown ones. “I didn’t know it at the time, but I fell in love with you.” I clear my throat and loudly swallow. “In a matter of weeks, I went from avoiding relationships to wondering if I could make one work with you.” I move a little closer and she makes no attempt to stop me.

  “I was nervous, mainly because you were positive you had to leave, but I also wondered if I had what it took to be the man you deserved. Then you left.” My voice unwillingly cracks. I hear Isabelle sniffle as her eyes glass over.

  “I knew I was falling for you, but I discovered I was in love with you after you left. I convinced myself you returned
to the only life you knew how to live because, right or wrong, that made the pain a little more bearable.” I wait, hoping she’ll say something but she doesn’t. “I moved out of here and into an apartment with Alex. Life continued, but my mind and heart were stuck on you.” I reach out and place my hand on top of hers.

  “Alex started seeing this woman, Brooke, and they pushed for me to go out with her friend, Kami. To move on,” I slowly add. “I gave in and went out on a double date. She seemed like a nice chick so I agreed to see her again. We didn’t go out more than a handful of times.”

  She doesn’t pull her hand back, but I see the hurt in her eyes. I took Kami out while she was in a shithole, pregnant with my child, fighting to stay alive. “I hated every moment I was with her. I...I wanted you,” I add as a tear falls from her eye.

  “I didn’t even kiss her, Isabelle. That’s why I didn’t say anything about her when you asked because there was nothing to tell.”

  She pulls her hand back to wipe her tears away. She blows out a sigh and smiles. “When I found out I was pregnant, I thought Damian was going to kill me. Then...then I thought he might kill you if he ever saw you,” she says with a laugh. “I didn’t want to keep your child from you, but I didn’t know if I could come back. I stopped myself from thinking too much about the future and about things I couldn’t control but ...” She pauses as her eyes water again. “But I hoped you were happy. I’m not mad that you moved on, but I refuse to be the person who holds you back.” She’s looking at me with a sad smile that breaks my heart.

  “God, Isabelle,” I breathe out before grabbing her face in my hands, forcing her to look at me.

  “I didn’t plan for you. I didn’t plan for this baby. But now that I have you...I can’t picture my life without you.” Her eyes widen before she sniffles then slowly smiles, causing everything inside of me to relax.

  “I love you, Isabelle Paasch, and if I didn’t think you’d knee me in the balls right now, I’d ask you to marry me.” I chuckle as she wraps her arms around my waist and nuzzles into my chest.