All Amity Allows (Fall for You Book 2)

by Irwin, Michelle

She offered him a smile. “Just earning the roof over my head.”

  “You don’t really need—”

  She cut him off by pressing two fingers against his lips. It was a natural reaction, but it sent the familiar jolt of pain racing through her and she leapt away from him. She yanked her hand away and rubbed her fingers together absently at her side. “I really don’t mind. In fact, I quite enjoyed it.”

  Her gaze trailed over his body without her permission. When she lifted her eyes back up to meet his, she saw amusement dancing in the depths of his hazel-blue irises and realized he’d caught her wandering gaze.

  He practically puffed his chest as she fought back the blush that her human shell caused to rise on her cheeks.

  To Drew’s credit, he didn’t call her out on her obvious ogling. Instead, he gave her a genuine smile. “I’m starved now though. Why don’t we have showers and head out for some dinner? My treat. It’ll be my thank you for everything you’ve done for me so far.”

  She stepped away from him a little, fixing her ponytail even though it was fine. He was heaping far more praise on her than she really deserved—she was just trying to fix the things that she’d destroyed in the first place.

  “I’m not sure I’ve really done that much,” she said.

  “Please? Have dinner with me. It’s the least I can do.”

  She didn’t really need food, but she couldn’t explain that to Drew without raising more questions. Then again, she really couldn’t think of one good reason to say no.

  Besides, she thought. What harm can come from having dinner?

  Chapter Ten

  Drew had no idea what had possessed him to ask Amity out for dinner. He was standing there recovering from her hard-ass training session when the desire to take her out, to treat her the way a lady should be treated, washed over him. He supposed it was better than another night moping around the house over the things that he’d lost.

  Maybe Dad’s right. Maybe I am rebounding.

  He supposed that it wasn’t really fair to Amity to use her as a filler in his life, but he didn’t think he could help it either. It had felt good when her eyes trailed over his body; he would have been lying to deny it. It had sent the blood pumping around his body to an entirely different muscle than the ones he’d just been working out. She was an attractive woman, and the fact she was taking an interest in his health and well-being, made it hard not to feel some sort of desire for her.

  Knowing that women typically took longer to get ready, he decided to take his time in the shower, ensuring he worked out every ounce of tension that she’d elicited in him with her smoldering gazes and gentle, coaxing touches.

  When he’d finished, he picked out an outfit, which was probably a little more formal than he needed to wear for the places available for them to dine, but he wanted to impress her. He shouldn’t have wanted to, but he did.

  Surprisingly, she was already ready when he’d finished getting dressed. He’d been ready to wait patiently, expecting her to take forever like most of the other women he’d dated.

  “Look who’s finally ready to go,” she teased.

  He thought about what he’d been spending his time doing while she’d been out here waiting patiently for him and embarrassment burned through him. “I would have been quicker, but I’m already sore from the workout you put me through,” he said to justify his delay. “It’s been a long time since anyone has worked me so hard—outside of the bedroom at least.” He frowned when he realized that he was doing the whole truth telling at the expense of his dignity thing again. “I mean . . .” When he couldn’t think of any way to change or explain away what he’d just said, he decided to just run with it. He offered her an embarrassed smile. “Wow, did I really just say that?”

  Amity laughed, and once more, he was struck by how melodious the sound was. He wanted to make her laugh over and over again.

  “It’s okay. Your secret is safe with me. Let me know if you want me to go easier on you next time though.”

  “Definitely not. It’s the best workout I’ve had in ages—even though I know I’ll ache tomorrow.”

  “Maybe we’ll try some stretching tomorrow then. Yoga, perhaps?”

  He scrunched his nose up. “I’m not sure about that. I’ve never rea—” He cut himself off before he could say that he’d never really been into yoga because an image of what yoga with Amity might entail popped into his mind. He could almost see her bending and stretching to show him how to get into all of the right positions. He might have been recovering from heartache, but he was a man, and the thought of watching a beautiful woman stretch and contort herself into a variety of poses in front of him was more than he could resist. He wasn’t a saint after all. Perhaps a few yoga sessions with Amity were exactly what the doctor ordered to get over Becca. “Actually, you know what? That sounds like a great idea.”

  He offered her his arm before leading her out to his car. He didn’t really have a plan for where he was going to take her, only for where he wouldn’t. Any place that had been a scene of a date with Becca was strictly off limits. Partly because he wanted to start his friendship with Amity off with a clean slate and no lingering reminders of Becca, but also because he wasn’t sure he could keep his mouth from running off with every little fact of his relationship if he was close to reminders of it. It seemed that highly emotional situations were the ones that caused that issue to rear its ugly head the most.

  Then he decided where they would go. There was a small Thai restaurant down the road from his house that he’d eyed as he’d moved his belongings from his father’s house. True, it wasn’t entirely suited to his needs—he’d thought that his first time dining there would be with Becca, but he hoped that the potential setting for a possible date wouldn’t give him the same emotional baggage as the actual location of a real date.

  The restaurant was small; there were only ten tables, most with only two seats, but even still, the place was empty. Maybe it was because it was the middle of the week, but regardless, they didn’t have any trouble finding a table.

  Drew led Amity toward her seat and when the waiter arrived, ordered three dishes for the two of them to share.

  “Do you do that a lot?” Amity asked. Her tone was more amused than annoyed, but there was an edge to it, which Drew didn’t understand.

  “Do what?”

  “Order food for everyone at the table.”

  “I—uh, I don’t know.” He’d never really thought about it. It was something he’d always seen his Dad do when he was younger. He’d just fallen into the habit too when he’d started dating. “I guess so.”

  “You know, there are some who would consider that rude.”

  He blinked at her. He’d never even thought about it. No one had ever mentioned it before. Even Becca, who’d been willing to push back on so many things, had never mentioned it. Not really. At least, not outside of complaining about always having to eat so healthily. “Really? Are you sure?”

  Amity laughed. “I’m sure.”

  “I’m sorry,” he said. The last thing he’d wanted to do was offend his houseguest.

  She just smiled in a way that assured him she wasn’t really upset, but it had given him a cause to stop and think about the way he’d been in the past.

  For a moment, he let a frown cross his face as he wondered why no one had ever just come out and told him if they had an issue. Maybe it was just Amity, maybe she just had some strange customs coming from Canada—or something like that. After a moment, he decided to push it out of his mind and enjoy the rest of the evening. He’d had a decent day so there was no point in ruining it over something as trivial as ordering food.

  He leaned forward against the table and gave Amity as warm a smile as he could muster while his mind continued to work on the ordering food conundrum without his consent. “I guess if we’re going to live together, we should get to know each other a little better.”

  “Now that you’re sober enough to remember it you mean?
”

  “Funny.”

  “Well, I’m just saying. You were too drunk to even remember who I was, or anything about our arrangement last night. It’ll be nice to have a conversation that I know won’t be forgotten in twelve hours’ time.”

  “Let me guess. You’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”

  “Maybe one day.” Her smile turned wicked. “Once you’ve given me something else to remember you for, that is.”

  Her statement made his mouth dry and his pants tight. There was so much he could do for her that she’d remember. He closed his eyes and reminded himself of his decision to keep her at arms-length so he didn’t end up with another disastrous relationship so soon after Becca had broken his heart. Especially not a disaster that he then needed to room with, at least until she found somewhere else to live. He didn’t need a rebound—didn’t want one. What he needed, and what Amity offered, was friendship. Just friendship. “I guess I’ve some work to do to repair my reputation.”

  Amity waved her arm around the restaurant. “This is a good start.”

  Minutes later, the food was placed in front of them and Drew found the perfect segue into normal conversation. He asked a little more about her family, and soon realized it was a topic Amity was a little coy about. He was willing to let it go and move on to a different subject to avoid making the dinner uncomfortable.

  “So what are your plans here in Flint? Or at least, what brought you here before I waylaid you with my sad tales?”

  “My brother actually asked me to stop by. Said I might find a meaningful position.”

  “Have you checked it out?”

  She laughed at something, but shook her head when he gave her a questioning look. “I have. I’m not sure it’s quite right for me though.”

  Something akin to sorrow swept through him—would she be moving on just when he thought he’d found someone to help him shed his misery. You’ve known her all of a day, he berated himself, you should not be this attached already.

  “Are you going to be leaving soon then?” he dared to ask, hoping he could keep the extent of the misery that statement caused him hidden.

  “Maybe. Probably. I don’t know. Honestly, I haven’t thought further ahead than what we’ve got going on here.” She waved her hand between them. “I’m happy with that for a while.”

  “So this, between us, you’re happy for it to go on?” he asked. “It’s something you want to do, I mean?”

  Amity wondered the best way to answer Drew’s question. She knew that he was talking about something completely different to what she was talking about, but she wanted to answer him without lying. She’d learned it was far easier to skate around the truth than to lie outright. “It’s been a while since I’ve been so directly hands-on with anyone, but I am enjoying it so far.”

  “What have you been doing up until you arrived in Flint then?”

  “Lately, I’ve been on something of a sabbatical.”

  “Why?” Drew looked honestly confused by her statement.

  She knew why the concept was foreign to him of course. He was career driven to the extreme. It had been instilled in him at such an early age; he probably didn’t even realize that there was any other way to be. Even if she hadn’t learned that from him the instant she’d touched his soul, blind Freddy could have seen it. It was obvious in every aspect of his life. There was little he did that wasn’t to improve himself somehow—either personally or professionally.

  Amity looked deep within herself for the answer to Drew’s question. The answer was actually simpler than she cared to admit. “Because I started to question the point of it all.”

  “The point of what?”

  It was impossible for her to articulate every issue she had, especially while keeping her true nature hidden. “Of working hard. Of pleasing everyone else first and foremost. Of having to put up with other people’s crap just to get a little bit further ahead. I mean I get it. There’s a certain satisfaction that comes from hard work, but I had the world at my feet. There was a time when thousands worshipped me, but it didn’t matter. After a while, I stopped caring and then I started to make mistakes.”

  “Thousands worshipped you? You couldn’t have had that many clients, surely? Or did you do workout DVDs?” Drew moved from side to side, as if trying to get a better look at her. Perhaps trying to work out whether he’d seen her on the cover of some fitness DVD or in a magazine.

  “Something like that.” Amity couldn’t believe how much she’d revealed unwittingly. She wondered whether the wound she’d torn in Drew’s soul was working in reverse. She needed to change the subject before she spilled secrets that she shouldn’t. “What about you? Why medicine?”

  He gave her a wry smile. “I’m not sure I really ever had much of a say in it. It was medicine or medicine as far as both of my parents were concerned. My only choice was what I’d specialize in.”

  “So why did you choose the heart?” It had come out before Amity had considered the fact that it was knowledge she probably shouldn’t have. Knowledge gleaned from the moment she’d brushed his soul and not something he’d told her aloud. For a second, she held her breath, waiting for Drew to question the source of her information.

  Instead, he just smiled. “Call me a hopeless romantic, but I hoped to help mend people’s broken hearts.”

  “You say ‘hopeless romantic’ like it’s a bad thing.”

  He snorted. “Isn’t it? I mean it hasn’t exactly helped me at all.”

  “You mean the Becca thing?” Amity didn’t really want to mention his ex-girlfriend’s name, not while they were having such a good time, but she was certain that was what he was alluding to.

  He clenched his teeth. “Yeah. The Becca thing. It’s just hard to accept that I lost her. That I lost in general really. I never lose. Not since I stopped being a middle school loser. It’s hard to explain, but she was my end game in so many ways. She was the one I saw myself with whenever I thought about the future. There was a time when I thought I was so madly in love with her that I couldn’t even think straight. Back in middle school, she was the subject of every boyhood fantasy. I lost count of the number of times I jerked off to thoughts of her. And I thought finally, finally, that the plan was working out the way it was supposed to. Only then, that asshole started to get more and more friendly and everything started to go wrong. I don’t know what I did or didn’t do that ruined it, or whether the whole thing was doomed before it began, but I can guarantee we would have had more of a chance without him on the scene. I could have tried again to win her heart and maybe I would have, and God-fucking-dammit, I’m doing it again!”

  Amity tried not to laugh at Drew’s exasperation. She could feel the pain and frustration bleeding from him, and she truly did feel sorry for him, but his blustering expression was almost comical.

  Drew took a deep breath. “Could you just forget I ever said anything?”

  “I can if that would make things easier.” Amity assessed him for a moment. The corners of his eyes were pinched with stress and the post-exercise glow had faded. Knowing the personal cost would be high, but not really caring, she reached out her hand and placed it on his arm. She barely flinched as the ache of his broken heart and torn soul stung her fingers and echoed throughout her body. “Or you can keep talking. I’m a good listener.”

  She drew her hand back and placed it in her lap, trying not to be obvious as she tried to shake away the pain.

  “I don’t want to burden you with my bullshit.”

  “It’s no burden. And it’s not bullshit. You loved and lost. That hurts.”

  “You’ve experienced heartbreak too?”

  Her statement had obviously come out with such sorrow he could tell she’d been hurt. If only he knew the truth—that her hurt was from the very mistakes that had led him to experience the heartache he was going through.

  “You could say that.” She was worried he might ask the next, inevitable question. One which she wouldn
’t be able to answer in any way that could satisfy him—who broke her heart and how? She pleaded with him silently not to.

  As if reading her cues, he snorted and held up his wine glass. “Here’s to us, a couple of heartbroken saps.”

  She gave him a grin, willing to move on and change the subject. “Cheers.”

  The conversation ebbed and flowed with a natural ease after that. At least until Drew waxed lyrical for five minutes on why it was so important to maintain a good career trajectory. That the only way to be truly successful in life was to have a great job and constantly strive for the next level.

  “Bullshit,” Amity said, not willing to allow him the concession of her pandering to his beliefs.

  “What do you mean bullshit?”

  “I mean it doesn’t matter if you are the chief of staff at a hospital or a homeless person left destitute by your own choices.”

  “Of course it does.”

  “No. It really doesn’t. What matters is whether you are a good person. Whether you do what you can to help your fellow man. Whether you support the dreams and interests of those you love. That’s what matters.”

  “But why can’t you do both?”

  “I’m not saying that you can’t. I’m just saying that at the end of it all, it doesn’t really matter. When you die, it’s how you were as a person, and not what your career was, that matters. That’s what determines whether your soul moves up or down.”

  Drew looked at her in shock. “You mean Heaven or Hell?”

  He frowned, no doubt at the turn the conversation had taken. Amity instantly regretted saying anything. Faith was always a touchy topic with humans—she could never know whether they would be offended or not or which particular strain of religion they had chosen to follow.

  “I didn’t take you for a religious person,” he added.

  It was Amity’s turn to snort. “Heaven and Hell have nothing to do with religion. They are to do with faith.”

  “Same thing.”

  She shook her head sadly. “No. They’re really not.”