Gabriel's Light (Doms of Chicago)

by Trace, Dakota

“You been trying to bribe Micah into spilling my special blend again, Gabe?” Folding his arms over his massive chest, Jude glared down at him.

  “So what if I was?” Gabe shot back, not really worried about the bluster coming from the other man. As long as it wasn’t his family being threatened, or something to do with his security company, the man was all bark and no bite. The atrium went quiet as Josh, Caelan, and Dominic, who’d just arrived, went on alert.

  Jude reached out in a sudden burst of speed and grabbed him by the shirt collar, yanking him closer. “Then I say…” He leaned in until his face was mere inches from Gabriel’s. “…it’s about damned time.”

  Laughter erupted around them, as Jude gave him a good-natured shove when he released him. “It’s hard to believe but I’ve actually missed your constant whining about how you need a recipe that’s been handed down in my family for generations….”

  Gabriel rolled his eyes. “You make it sound like it’s some priceless secret.”

  Jude nodded solemnly. “It is. Only people with the last name Larson are privileged to it.”

  Gabriel tapped his chin thoughtfully. “Fine, I’ll just wait ‘til Deborah is old enough to tell me.”

  Jude gave a loud growl at the mention of his daughter’s name, just before lunging at Gabriel again. This time Gabriel was prepared and feigned to the left, laughing as Jude nearly ended up in the koi pond. Friendly bets hit the air, as the rest of the men urged them on. As they tussled good-naturedly, Gabriel relaxed even more. It’d been so long since he’d cut loose like this.

  That was until a sharp feminine voice broke through their play. “What the hell is going on here? It sounds like there’s a stampede of elephants are getting ready to come through the ceiling of my office.”

  Jude froze in place, but he still had Gabriel in a headlock. “Mistress.”

  Standing less than twenty feet away, Olivia, who was dressed in her normal club clothing: a tightly laced corset and black leggings, glared at them with one hand on her hip. A slight frown creased her brow before she walked up to the two men. “What exactly are you doing to Gabriel, pet?”

  Jude shrugged, taking Gabriel’s head up in the motion. Squirming, Gabriel tapped his arm. “Hey, you behemoth…let go before you rip my fucking head off.”

  “Oh, sorry.” He let go of Gabriel with a casual ease that had Gabe shaking his head. Damn, if the man was ever serious about hurting a guy, there would be no playing around. Limping or not, he was lethal.

  “I’m waiting, pet.” Olivia’s reminder grabbed Gabriel’s attention. He didn’t want Jude in trouble…they were just fucking around. But before he could open his mouth, Jude did.

  “I thought you said it was just us guys tonight, Mistress.” He darted a look at Caelan.

  “Don’t look at him to protect you. I did say you and Micah deserved a night to blow off some steam, but I didn’t say you were to choke the living shit out Gabriel when we just got him to step foot back into the club.”

  Gabriel watched in amazement as Jude actually flushed. “He said he was going to ask Deborah for my family’s secret blend…”

  She studied Jude for a moment, her expression perplexed. “And your idea of an appropriate response is to choke him?”

  Gabriel had seen enough. “We were screwing around, Liv. Cut the man some slack.”

  “Men.” She shook her head. “Unbelievable. Give them good food and a few beers and they revert back to the caveman days.”

  “Sorry, Mistress.” Jude gave her a small, hopeful smile.

  She softened a bit, and cupped Jude’s cheek. “You’re forgiven as long as you didn’t tear up your knee again.” When he shook his head, she sighed. “Fine. All’s forgiven as long as there’s no more horsing around up here…and you bring me down a steak.”

  Jude nodded. “Of course.”

  * * * *

  Leaning back in his chair, Gabriel was tempted to undo the top button on his jeans. Damned if the steaks hadn’t been as delicious as he’d remembered. He was more relaxed than he could remember being in a long time. “Damn that was one of the best steaks I’ve had in a long time. You sure you won’t cough it up, Jude?”

  Across the table, Jude laughed as he tossed his wadded-up paper towel on the table. There was no fine linen or china here tonight. Just heavy-duty paper plates, plastic solo cups and a roll of paper towels. “Nope, I don’t care how many times you ask. The recipe is gonna stay mine.”

  “But it won’t keep me from asking. One of these days you’ll give it up.” Gabriel reached for his beer. “Yep…one of these days…”

  Jude snorted, before leaning forward to point his finger at Gabriel. “Kinda like you’re going to give up living in the past? Now there’s something I might actually give it up for.”

  “Way to go, you asshole,” Micah growled throwing his empty cup at Jude. “We’re supposed to ease him into it. Not just lambaste him with it.”

  Jude scowled, knocking the cup away from him. “Why pussyfoot around it? Sara’s dead, and he needs to move on.”

  Gabriel’s relaxation flew out the window at the mention of Sara’s name. “Is that why you asked me out tonight because you think I’m trying to crawl into the grave with Sara?”

  “Well, I wouldn’t say that…” Caelan was trying to be diplomatic. “…but we’re concerned about you…”

  “Concerned.” Jude shook his head. “You haven’t been the same since her death. You never come to the club anymore. You just started hosting the munches again at the restaurant, but other than a brief hello to everyone, you disappear into your office until it’s over. That’s not the Gabriel the community knows. Then you get pissed because we worry about you.”

  Anger rose in Gabriel. If it weren’t for the table between him and the other man, he’d have decked the asshole. “I’m not going to sit here and discuss what you think is a proper mourning time and what isn’t.”

  “We’re not trying to do that, Gabe,” Caelan reassured him as he placed his hand on Gabriel’s arm.

  Shrugging it off, he stood. “I think it’s time for me to go home.”

  “Don’t.” For the first time since the subject had been brought up, Dominic spoke up from the end of the table. “If anyone here knows what you’re going through here, it’s me. Don’t shut us out. Don’t take the route I took.”

  The melancholy in Dominic’s voice wasn’t a surprise. During Katrina, the Cajun had lost his submissive because he hadn’t wanted to abandon his property. Gabriel softened a bit, the man did know what he was going through - at least the part about losing a submissive. None of the men present knew about the baby and he was going to keep it that way.

  “So what is this? An intervention?” He sank back into his chair.

  Josh nodded. “In a way. Jude just wanted to beat you over the head with a two-by-four until you figured it out, but we convinced him this way was better.”

  Gabriel drew a ragged breath and looked around the atrium at his friends. In truth they were more than friends, even if he wanted to kill each and every one of them at the moment. “Well, my head thanks you, but I still don’t want to talk about her.” He glared at Jude. “What would your Mistress say if she knew what you were up to?”

  “That it’s been over a year, it’s time to let her go. Sara wouldn’t want this for you.” Olivia joined the men.

  “You’re in on this too?” His voice came out sharp as he realized the lengths his friends were willing to go. The sinking feeling in his stomach intensified as he wondered how many of the counterparts of those present knew this was going on. Fuck, that’s all I need, Nisey and Kalinda worrying about me along with Olivia.

  “Of course. Don’t think for a minute I’d have let Jude and Micah do this if I didn’t whole-heartedly agree with them.”

  Gabriel squeezed the bridge of his nose. “So you all want me to just forget she ever existed? Is that it? Like she never gave me her submission…that we were happy…that we weren’t expecting a child…” Hi
s voice cracked, but he forced himself to keep it together. Horror washed over him, as Olivia’s eyes widened and the sudden inhale from the every one of the men made him realize what he’d just said.

  “Fuck.” He let the first tear fall. This was exactly what he hadn’t wanted.

  Chapter Six

  Pulling up in front of his home, Gabriel was surprised Caelan had even brought him. After his breakdown at the club, he’d lashed out at his friends, taking his anger and despair out on all of them. He wasn’t proud of the way he’d acted, but the wound festering since Sara’s death was now clean. It had been exposed until he felt like nothing more than one large aching mass, but one that could now heal.

  “I…” He turned to face Caelan. “I don’t know what to say…”

  Caelan, who also looked a little rough around the edges, sighed. Gabriel really put his best friends through the wringer tonight, spewing obscenities as the men poked and prodded until they’d gotten the whole sordid tale out of him. Of how he’d thought he’d failed not only Sara but their unborn child as well, even how he’d planned to marry his little blonde sub.

  “Don’t say anything. We knew going into this it was going to be rough.” Caelan shut off the SUV “You’re a proud man, Gabe. You play your cards close to your chest and the only person I’ve ever seen you truly open up with was Sara. I can only imagine how it would be to lose that closeness. But as your friends, we couldn’t let you continue to live like this - numb to the world, or keeping yourself so busy you can’t feel the pain. It’s not good. Christ, the only time I’ve seen any honest to God emotion from you was the day Sophia was born.”

  Gabriel tipped his head back to stare at the ceiling. “Well it was a pretty intense situation. It’s not every day a man is asked to deliver a baby.” He rubbed his hand over his face. “But dammit, did you have to be so brutal with your intervention? I was just healing when you had to tear me back open. Man, you just didn’t rip the bandage off, you poured fucking salt into the wound.”

  “And you’d do the same if it was me.” Caelan drummed his fingers on the wheel. “But it wasn’t healing, Gabe, it was festering. So, hell yes, I’d do it again. Chew us out for sticking our noses where they didn’t belong, but it won’t change anything. At least you can heal now.”

  Gabriel threw his arm over his eyes. “I don’t know whether to be pissed off at you or be thankful right now, Caelan. I’m not even sure where to go from here. I realize it’s been a year since her death, but there are times I expect her to walk around the corner, to smile at me in the special way she had.”

  “And hopefully that’ll ease in time. I have faith in you. You’ll figure it out. We’re not saying you have to go out and find a submissive right now. Hell, it’s probably the worst thing in the world for you to do at this moment. We just want our Gabe back. The one who dropped into the club, the one who smiled all the time.”

  He dropped his arm. “I don’t know if I can go back to being that man, Caelan. Her death ripped something out of me. Something I can’t get back.”

  Caelan nodded. “I imagine it did. But now you have a chance to heal. Maybe once that’s happened, you’ll find out you’re a better man for it.”

  “Maybe.” He looked up at the dark house. “I don’t know if I want to go in there right now, Caelan. She’s everywhere. She helped me pick out the furniture, she made her mark on every room.”

  For the first time since the intervention, Caelan actually took mercy on him. “Then don’t. Come home with me tonight. You can spend the night with Nisey and I. Tomorrow is soon enough to face your demons. You’ll probably do better on a good night’s sleep anyway.”

  “Are you sure?” Gabriel hated the idea of acting like a needy child.

  Caelan chuckled. “What do you think? Nisey has texted me at least three times tonight. She’s worried about you just as much as us guys were. So why don’t you come to my place? You can use the spare room, and let Nisey give you some good ‘ole fashion loving.”

  “All right.” Even though he was raw and still wanted to pound Caelan for putting him through hell, he didn’t want to be alone tonight.

  “Good then, we’re agreed.” He pulled his cell out and punched a few buttons. “I’m heading home, grá, and we’re having a guest tonight. Make up the guest room for him.” Caelan chuckled softly. “Yes, it’s him. Now quit worrying and have his room ready, or you’ll be over the spanking bench when I get home.”

  Gabriel couldn’t hear what Nisey said in return, but it must’ve amused Caelan because he outright laughed at her. “I mean it, little subbie. It better be ready when we get there.” Then he closed the cell and grinned at Gabriel. “She’s absolutely incorrigible.”

  Even though witnessing the interaction between Caelan and his sub was difficult, Gabriel loved both of them like the family he’d never had. “You’re the one who wanted her,” Gabriel reminded him.

  “Of course I do. But that doesn’t mean I can’t keep her on her toes.” After checking the mirrors, Caelan shifted into gear, before easing back into traffic. “Something has been a bit off with her as of late, and I’m pretty sure I know what it is. If she doesn’t come clean soon about it, there’ll be a trip to the playroom she won’t like.”

  Eager for a change of subject to a topic which didn’t focus on him, Sara, or their unborn child, Gabriel latched on to it. “So what is it?”

  As Caelan drove towards Evanston, he explained Nisey’s recent behavior, her absent-mindedness, from her trying to fill every moment of the day with activity, to her physical changes, tender breasts, and missed cycles. The short and sweet of it was, Caelan thought his sub was either pregnant, or trying to hide something more serious from him.

  Gabriel mused as the SUV headed north. For Caelan’s sake, he hoped it was because Nisey was expecting, because if not, there was a very real chance Caelan could end up in the same situation he was in himself, and he wouldn’t wish that on anyone, even his worst enemy.

  * * * *

  Zhenya was just finishing up Sophia’s feeding when she heard Caelan’s SUV pull into the drive. She idly wondered how the intervention Nisey had spoken about earlier had gone. Her heart went out to Gabriel. She wouldn’t have wanted to be in his shoes after experiencing her own semi-intervention with Kalinda, Nisey and Olivia. They had peeled away her layers until she’d felt exposed, then found a support group for abused subs for her to join. She still attended their meetings, but she just wasn’t sure if the stuff she’d been told was true or not. There were still times, logical or not, she doubted her own self-worth as a sub. The five years under Ossie’s thumb was going to take time to overcome.

  The sound of male voices entering the foyer below her apartment had her pausing. Caelan wasn’t alone? It was probably one of the other Doms from the club. She was tempted to peak out of the door, but decided it was none of her business whom Caelan brought home with him. In the time she’d lived above him, he’d always been respectful of her privacy and kept the noise level to a minimum, so she could do no less for him in return.

  After burping her daughter, she stripped the little one down to her diaper. Sophia cooed and kicked her legs, always happy to be free of her sleeper. A smile crossed Zhenya’s face. Her little girl was such a sweetheart, and so much like her father in looks, it sometimes broke Zhenya’s heart.

  “Come on, mikró pontíki, it’s time for Momma’s little girl to have her bath.” Swinging Sophia up in her arms, she carried her down the hall. Once Sophia was bathed and settled in bed, she’d consider going to bed herself. Being a new mother was tiring work, and their little outing today had really taken it out of her. Starting the water, she was just getting ready to remove Sophia’s diaper when she thought she heard something. Was someone knocking on her door? It couldn’t be the phone, the cordless handset was sitting on the bathroom counter.

  Frowning, she turned off the water and listened intently. When it came again, she stood and carried Sophia back out to the living room. Grabbing t
he receiving blanket off the back of the couch she bundled Sophia up, all the while wondering who could be calling at eight o’clock at night. Opening the door, she was shocked to her toes when she saw Caelan and Gabriel standing in the tiny landing. As big as the men were, they filled the hall to overflowing.

  “Yes?” Concern laced her voice as she took in their appearances. Both men looked like they’d gone through hell tonight, which she could only assume they had.

  “Can we come in? We didn’t wake Sophia, did we?” Caelan requested, ever the considerate landlord.

  “No, I was just getting ready to give Sophia her bath, but you can come in.” Stepping back, she ushered both men into the tiny apartment, which suddenly felt even smaller with the men inside of it.

  “I’m sorry to come up so late, but Nisey just told me about what happened today.” Caelan sank down on the futon while Gabriel leaned up against the breakfast bar separating the kitchen from the living room.

  She gave him a tight smile as she gently bounced her squirming daughter. Sophia would getting fussy soon. She needed to get through this quickly as possible so she could put her daughter down. “Yes it was a rather unpleasant surprise. I thought I’d left all the drama behind in Greece.”

  “When it comes to family there’s never such a thing as no drama when you’re dealing with a Greek male.” Gabriel drummed his fingers on the counter behind him.

  She snorted. “When it comes to the half-American wife of his son, there is nothing but, Master Gabriel. Not only wasn’t I good enough for his precious son, Sebastene Sikkenga believes women to be second class citizens, only good for fucking or making babies. You probably can guess which he labeled me as. His hatred of Americans left little room for affection. Even if he knew I’d had Ossie’s daughter, he might be concerned, but I doubt it’ll be enough for him to leave his little kingdom to fly over here.”

  As if sensing her mother’s agitation, Sophia started to squirm, then whimper. “Shhh, mikró pontíki, Momma’s here.” Rubbing circles over her daughter’s back, she tried to soothe her, but obviously from her position against her shoulder, Sophia could not only see the two strange men in her environment, but could also feel her mother’s tension. Her face crumpled up as the whimpers turned into a scream.