‘But you will.’ Confused, she locked stares with eyes as hard as blue slate. ‘Why wouldn’t you?’
‘You know as well as I do there isn’t a museum in Australia, not even Museum Australasia, with a budget large enough to pay for something as unique as my fossil.’ From the uneasy way he held his broad shoulders, the words appeared to cause discomfort. But the resolve in his tone matched the steely expression on his face; angular jaw pushed forward and mouth turned sharply down.
‘Did you just say what I think you said?’ She stared at him in shocked uncertainty.
‘I told you, Gem, the skeleton is worth far more broken up and traded as individual opals than it is in one piece and sold as an exhibit,’ he explained again, his tone regretful but matter-of-fact.
‘I can’t believe I’m hearing this!’ Frustrated anger burned in her cheeks, and her hands balled themselves into fists. ‘You—you’re nothing like the man you used to be.’
His silence and the searing look he gave her may have been a warning to leave it at that but she refused to back off. She’d spent too many years caving in to Roger. No more.
‘Back at uni, that protest you organised against the damming of the Robson River because the area was rich in fossils, remember?’ She fired him a reproachful scowl. ‘I was so proud of you when they decided not to construct it because of the publicity created.’ She shook her head in disgust. ‘You used to be passionate about preserving the past. You used to have some integrity. What’s happened to you?’
Nostrils flaring, he flung her a hard glare of impatience. ‘I grew up and started living in the real world.’ His stormy eyes bored into hers. ‘And in the real world you need money to get anywhere.’
‘Money? That’s what it boils down to?’ Contempt didn’t even begin to describe her feelings. ‘You’re pathetic, Jamie.’ Disgusted, she turned to leave.
His reaction was explosive. ‘You know nothing about my situation! Or me!’
He reached out, grabbed her forearm and spun her back to face him. Startled, she refused to look up at him, fixing her gaze instead on the strong, square-tipped fingers almost encircling her arm, undeniable heat pulsing between them at the point of contact. The raw physicality shocked her. She wrenched away.
‘Come on now, Jamie.’ Lou put out a steadying hand.
‘Stay out of this, Lou. Gem, you’ve got no right to judge me,’ he continued, a muscle twitching on his jawline. ‘Everything was always easy for you. Well-off parents. Good schools. Falling into a cushy job.’
Easy for me? Gemma almost laughed out loud. Jamie couldn’t have even the slightest comprehension of what she’d been through since they’d parted ways. The humiliation, the threats, the complete erosion of self-esteem that had left her neck-deep in self-blame. The turmoil her marriage had descended into still haunted her, an old wound she preferred not to have reopened.
Jamie’s tirade continued. ‘You’ve never had to struggle for anything in your life, Gem, so don’t you dare condemn me for wanting something better for myself.’
Her disillusionment with him now transcended her anger. ‘Wanting something better for yourself at the expense of the rest of the world is the ultimate in selfishness.’ Her finger stabbed the air between them. ‘I don’t know you anymore.’ She paused, carried away with the emotion of the moment. ‘And I can’t believe I once cared for you,’ she ended, a catch in her voice.
‘Yeah, well, you’re not the person you once were, either.’ He glared down at her, exuding a hostile virility, and the bitterness in his tone appalled her.
‘What do you mean?’ she demanded, knowing it was a mistake but unable to stop herself.
‘You used to be warm. Giving.’ His eyes reflected his disappointment. ‘Now you’re cold and hard and your nose is stuck so high in the air you want to watch out a bird doesn’t nest up there.’
The hurt from his words spread through her. ‘Enough!’
But he hadn’t finished, continuing on with a renewed harshness. ‘Be honest, Gem, are you really here for the benefit of the museum, or for your own gain? To get that grant?’
His words hit home. The irony that she was here to win a grant that would enable her to earn more money wasn’t lost on her, but at least her need was justifiable—to secure a better future for her child.
They stood close, Jamie towering over her with eyes blazing blue fire, but she refused to let him intimidate her. Hands lodged on her hips, she let her gaze rove over him in icy contempt. ‘I won’t even bother with an answer. It’s no use talking to you when you’re like this. I’m going to bed.’
He met her glare for glare. ‘Suit yourself.’
She turned for the exit, warning herself to leave it alone, to just walk out, but suddenly the anger overflowed and she wheeled on him, fighting an incredible childish temptation to attack him with her fists. His hands went up in a warding-off gesture.
Lou gasped and they both glanced at her. In the heat of their exchange she’d been forgotten.
Gemma flashed her an apologetic glance then growled at Jamie, ‘Thanks for dinner!’
‘My pleasure.’ From his tone he meant the opposite.
She stalked towards the exit. ‘Put it on my tab. No doubt you need the money,’ she spat back over her shoulder.
‘It’s on me!’ he yelled after her.
If not for Lou’s presence she would’ve shown him a finger and given specific instructions as to what he could do with it.
Back in the haven of her room she pulled at the pins in the too-tight knot at her neck. The quick, angry dragging of a brush through her hair helped vent her frustrations. Jamie’s comments stung. She might well be those things he denounced her for—cold, hard—but who was to blame for that?
He was!
If he hadn’t abandoned her she would never have become involved with Roger. Certainly never have married him. And what about that accusation that she’d never had to struggle? How dare he? Life with an emotionally and verbally abusive husband was no picnic. If she wasn’t so ashamed of herself for putting up with Roger’s pervasive belittlements for so long she’d tell Jamie a thing or two about struggle.
Her resentful thoughts were interrupted by a knock. She moved to the door, squaring her shoulders, bracing for another onslaught of her ex-lover’s imposing presence.
‘I presume you’ve come to apologise,’ she said, pulling on the handle.
A bemused-looking Lou stood in the hallway. ‘Er, no, love. I’ve done all the apologising I can handle in one night. Can I come in anyway?’
With a self-conscious grimace Gemma held open the door. ‘Please.’
Lou settled into one of the padded armchairs. Gemma threw herself into the other.
‘Actually, I should apologise to you, too, love. I’m sorry you’ve come all this way for nothing. Although, in my defence, I only mentioned the fossil to Angela in passing, and she made no mention of wanting to buy it.’
‘It’s all been pretty hush-hush. We intended to keep the purchase under wraps until it was secured,’ Gemma explained, ruefully regarding her boss’s friend. ‘As far as apologies go, I’m sorry you had to witness all that.’
‘I wouldn’t have missed it for quids. It was very revealing.’ Lou’s laughter was the last thing she expected but the deep-throated chuckle forced a return smile.
‘I don’t usually allow myself to get so carried away, but that man—’ Gemma stopped, unable to express the things that man did to her without the prospect of losing control again.
The shrewd hazel eyes of the older woman fixed on her. ‘You know, I’ve known Jamie for something like three years now and I must tell you I’ve never seen him lose his cool like he just did. Ever. Obviously there are some deep feelings involved.’
‘Used to be,’ Gemma conceded. ‘Not anymore.’
‘Right.’ Lou nodded but the tone was disbelieving.
‘No. Really,’ Gemma insisted, annoyed at the heat suffusing her cheeks.
‘Love, I�
�ve been a district nurse for more years than I’d like to admit,’ Lou sighed, ‘and over that time I’ve observed a great deal of human nature. Jamie has clued me up on your relationship. Believe me, there’s more than past regrets happening between you two.’ Absolute certainty rang in her voice.
‘I can assure you I got over Jamie a long time ago. As he did me.’ She willed the other woman to understand, to accept the truth of the situation. ‘But even if he still had feelings for me, what difference would that make? He’s already made up his mind about the skeleton.’
‘Has he?’
‘You heard him.’
‘What I heard was the impulsive response of a man who believes he’s been betrayed.’
‘I didn’t betray him! He left me and he’d been gone for months before I married Roger,’ Gemma blurted out, surprised at the vehemence of the denial.
The older woman wrinkled her forehead. ‘Umm ... I meant me.’
‘You! But—’ Realising how sharp her voice had become, Gemma softened it. ‘I don’t understand.’
‘I didn’t stop to think about the implications when I mentioned the fossil to Angela. Jamie’s dad didn’t tell me it was a secret.’ She sounded profoundly embarrassed.
‘Jamie’s dad told you?’
‘Harry and I are ... friends, good friends,’ she said, affection in her tone. ‘I’ve come to care for that man, and his son, and I feel very badly about letting the secret out. I’ve just explained to Jamie my mistake and he’s forgiven me, thank goodness. Now we just need to sort out this problem between you two.’
‘There’s nothing to sort out. He wants money, way more than the museum could ever pay. He knows the sort of budget we’re limited by. End of story.’
Lou lifted an eyebrow and gave a shrug. ‘I won’t even pretend to know what’s going on in that darling young man’s head, although he has been making hints lately about a possible move away from here.’ She sighed resignedly. ‘If that’s the case, Harry will probably go with him. Those two are inseparable, you know.’
Yes, Gemma knew. She’d come to that same understanding one morning seven years earlier. Her helplessness at being unable to persuade Jamie not to go off with his father was reflected in the deep-set eyes of the woman opposite her. It seemed the closeness of father and son might yet again take precedence over any other relationship.
Her heart went out to Lou. ‘Maybe Jamie’s dad will decide to stay here.’
‘Maybe ... ’ The middle-aged woman’s eyes crinkled up in thought. ‘But if you were to talk Jamie into selling the fossil to your museum, they’d have to reconsider their options.’
‘You’re talking realms of fantasy there, I’m afraid. No way is Jamie going to settle for less than what he believes the skeleton’s worth.’
Lou waved an arm in dismissal. ‘Don’t be too sure. You’ve got something very powerful at your disposal to make him change his mind.’
‘I do?’ Though doubtful, her interest was piqued.
‘You do. Jamie’s feelings for you.’
She almost guffawed. ‘We haven’t seen each other for seven years and in the few hours I’ve been here we haven’t exactly ... reconnected. On any level. He’s no more in love with me than ... than I am with him.’
‘You think so? You seemed familiar when I met you earlier. Jamie once showed me a photo of you.’
‘Riddled with dart holes?’
Lou laughed out loud. ‘No. He looked at it with genuine care. And regret, I might add.’
Not knowing what to make of this unexpected insight into the man she now had no option but to regard as her nemesis, Gemma shook her head. ‘After our little scene tonight I’m guessing he’ll be relegating it to the circular file.’
‘I don’t think so. I’ve known that young man to be quite susceptible to feminine charms at times. I’d use mine but they’re past their use-by date.’ The older woman chuckled as she rose. ‘Yours aren’t.’
After Lou left, Gemma collapsed back into the armchair. The thought of losing out on the grant was untenable. Earning it would not only ultimately result in a higher-paying job and a better life for her and Drew, but it would also prove to Roger that she was a successful woman, no longer the pathetic girl who’d allowed his abuse to go on for too long. The horror their marriage had disintegrated into had left its mark, but in taking back control of her life, making herself a winner, she’d prove she was made of strong stuff. Her son needed to witness that side of her, too; to see his mum as a capable, working single mother.
She sighed, missing her little man with his smoochy kisses and little-boy giggles. Hopefully he was having a good time staying with Angela. Not only was the woman her boss, she was also a good friend, and the only person Gemma trusted her son with.
Of more immediate concern was finding some way to change Jamie’s mind about the skeleton. Did she have it in her to use him, to play up to him in order to get her hands on the fossil? From what Lou intimated, other women had successfully used their feminine wiles on him—how many other women she didn’t care to know.
Oh, who am I trying to kid? Playing up to him was never going to happen. All too aware of how degrading it felt to be used, she’d never take advantage of someone else’s weakness like that.
Sleeping on the problem might help. The prospect of oblivion was welcoming—today had been a long, long day—but while her body felt drained, her brain refused to rest. A walk around the motel’s intriguing interior might tire her enough for sleep to take hold. The place appeared to be a rabbit warren of corridors, much bigger than it looked from the outside. She unhooked the Evacuation Plan map from the back of the door and, laminated card in hand, wandered into the silence of the earth-carved hallway.
In the foyer, the sight of the phone on the reception desk stopped her for a moment. It was way too late to call and speak to Drew now but, with her mobile out of action, she’d definitely take advantage tomorrow of Jamie’s offer to use it.
A plastic rack of tourist brochures caught her eye and she stopped for a browse. The cool quiet of the reception area had a wonderful calming effect and soon she found herself yawning. Further exploration could wait until tomorrow.
Rounding a corner on her way back to her room, she caught sight of Jamie’s easily identifiable form disappearing through a doorway. He hadn’t seen her. Was it her imagination or had he seemed furtive? She checked the map. Apparently the room he’d entered didn’t exist. Maybe a storage room?
What better place to keep a skeleton?
On instinct she knocked then entered without waiting. Inside she stopped dead, transfixed.
Chapter 4
‘What are you doing here?’ Jamie’s words reverberated off the rough-hewn walls of the massive chamber in which Gemma found herself.
Almost indistinguishable from the dark shadows surrounding him he emerged, hands planted aggressively on his hips, into the light of the single bulb hanging from a piece of shoring timber against one wall. He wore only a pair of hip-hugging jeans, well-worn victims of time that clung to every outline of his lower torso. Her gaze slid up, taking in the broad shoulders, the musculature of his sun-bronzed chest, then wandered back down over hard stomach muscles to rest for a moment on the line of black hair arrowing into the top of his jeans.
He looked like some primitive Neanderthal—savagely uncivilised, reeking of virility.
Emotions she’d spent years denying rocketed through her, bringing images of a younger version of this beautiful body. Back then his shoulders had been less muscular, his chest not quite as broad. She struggled to feel nothing as nostalgia swept over her but the power of the memories was formidable.
‘Well?’ The anger in his stance reflected in his voice.
‘I … I—’
She couldn’t drag her eyes off him, let alone string enough words together to answer his question. Her heart thumped so hard at the base of her throat it felt like it was about to implode; she fought to regain a grip. She was here for a reason
... what was it again?
Pushing everything but the need to remember why she’d come in here from her mind, she finally spoke. ‘I’ve been looking for you.’ No reason to mention she’d hoped to find the skeleton in here.
He moved closer so they were almost touching and her nostrils widened in response to the manly smell. A potent combination of spicy aftershave mixed with musky sweat. Intoxicating. The map dropped from her hands.
‘I thought we agreed to stay away from each other.’ Jamie’s look was hostile.
This was not going well. Being at odds with him was definitely not the way to woo him into selling her the fossil. Reparation needed to be made.
Forcing a small smile, she bit at her lower lip, giving her best impression of contrition. ‘I shouldn’t have said some of the things I did.’
She broke away from his hard-eyed stare hoping the lie that she may not have been able to keep from her eyes at least sounded convincing. She felt like a hypocrite but the benefits of acquiring the skeleton had to be worth a little deceit. Didn’t they?
Dammit, why did she find lying so difficult?
‘You’re admitting you were wrong?’ He raised a cynical eyebrow.
She renewed contact with his dark-blue eyes and nodded. ‘I’ve been thinking things over and I want you to know… ’ she took a deep breath—this was harder than she thought— ‘… what you decide to do with the fossil is your own business.’
* * *
Jamie stared at her, trying to determine whether Gem meant the words. She appeared a model of remorse but the change in attitude was a little too radical. He didn’t know what to make of her.
All he could be sure of was this desire he still felt for her. He breathed in the scent of roses that drifted over him. The light from the bare globe cast her face into strong relief, accentuating the hollows and high planes of her cheeks, the fullness of those luscious lips, the pools of ice-blue that were her eyes. She looked unbearably sexy.
His anger over her earlier reactions to his plans for the skeleton abated. She seemed genuinely apologetic and continuing to argue would get them nowhere. Clearly she’d come to the same conclusion.
Falling In Love Again Page 4
