Dearest Cowboys Box Set

by Mia Brown

  I lost track of orgasms. I wasn’t sure if I was still orgasming or if it was on to the next one. Either way, it was delicious.

  We changed positions, and we fucked. We worked out the tension between us with orgasms and cries and finally, after what felt like forever, Ace came inside me. He slammed into me and jerked and spasmed, emptying himself as I fell apart another time, coming undone at the seams.

  When it was all over, we lay together, panting.

  “I want to be with you,” Ace said through his heavy breathing. “I know we’re going to get stuck. We’re both stubborn. But I want you. So, you need to decide if you want me or not.”

  I looked at Ace. I was sweaty, my hairline wet, and I was spent. I could still feel him throbbing between my legs. I was going to feel it in the morning, I knew it.

  “I want you, too,” I said. He was right, of course. We would get stuck often. But I didn’t want to be away from him.

  “Good, then,” he said. “That’s settled. For God’s sake, stop taking it out on the workers.”

  I smiled. “Don’t tell me what to do.”

  He looked at me, and we grinned at each other.

  Thirty-Seven

  Ace

  On Sunday night, I asked Vanessa to help me cook dinner for everyone. We worked together, and it was great to see how well we did. Now that we had the tension out of the way and she’d forgiven me, we were a great team.

  We made roast chicken and vegetables and a salad. And we made out in between dishes.

  Lily had come in toward the end of it, and she’d helped set the table. Lance had poured drinks, and Alana had baked bread earlier that she was slicing now. Andrew, being the oldest, would carve the chicken. We were a team, and we acted like one.

  When everything was done, we sat down together. Andrew, Alana, Lance, Lily, Vanessa, and me. Slowly, our little family was growing. I looked around the table, and I felt a swell of warmth for the people that had become my own. We lost people, sometimes, and it was sad, but we were growing faster, and love and connection drew us together.

  “When Andrew and I were kids,” I said. “We used to have dinner together on Sunday as a family tradition. My parents used to cook together, and we would sit down and talk about our week, strengthening the relationships between the little core of this ranch. Only two of us are blood-related here, but this is our family now, and I want to keep up that tradition.”

  Andrew nodded, and I knew he felt as nostalgic about it all as I did.

  “I think it’s a great idea,” he said. “We’re a big community here at the ranch, as it were,” he said. “But we need to keep the bond between the six of us in here as strong as we can.”

  It was exactly how I felt about it. I glanced at Vanessa, who was smiling. She was so much a part of this life, now, it was hard to think that’s she’d only been with us the past couple of months. In a way, it felt like she had been here forever.

  “How far are the renovation plans for the kitchenette at the bunkhouse?” I asked Lance.

  “They’re done. We can start building as soon as you’re ready and then it will take about a month.”

  I nodded. “Right. We’ll instate this in a month’s time, then. When it’s just the six of us, and the other employees can take care of themselves at the bunkhouse.”

  Everyone nodded.

  “With that taken care of,” I said. “I want to propose a toast.” I lifted my glass. “To our family and our future together.”

  They all raised their glasses, and we drank to the good times that lay ahead. We dug into the food, and we chatted and joked around the table. This was how I wanted it. I wanted us to be together, to be there for each other, to support and love each other. Hard times were going to come along with the good times, and we needed to support each other. But I had a feeling we could get through them.

  We had already weathered the first storm.

  I looked at Lily. She wasn’t coping as well with ranch life, but she had a lot on her plate, and no one could say she wasn’t trying. Seeing her here, though, she looked happy. She could be a part of this place, I decided. Everyone needed somewhere to belong.

  I felt Vanessa’s eyes on me, and when I looked at her, she was smiling. We were okay again, and because of it, everything else would be fine, too.

  “How are things going with the calves?” I asked. I looked at Lily. Vanessa had been showing her the ropes, teaching her how to bottle feed.

  “It’s going okay,” Lily answered. “I don’t think I’m very good at it.”

  “You’ll get there,” Lance said.

  Lily nodded. She stared at her plate, pushing her food around. “I wish I fit in here,” she said. “I feel like you’re all so comfortable, and I’m like a toddler, learning how to walk when you’re all running.”

  “It takes time,” Vanessa said. “You’re doing great, and we’re all here to help.”

  Lily nodded, smiling but she started tearing up. This happened a lot.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, furiously wiping at her eyes. “I’m such a mess. I’m struggling a bit about my parents, that I’ll never be able to go home. You guys have been so good to me.”

  Lance put his arm around Lily, pulling her in for a side hug.

  “It’s hard, I know,” he said. “But this is your home now. Stick with the people that build you up and accept you. Here, we don’t judge, and we don’t reject.”

  She nodded and leaned her head on his shoulder, accepting his consolation. I watched the two of them. He was so caring, and she seemed to need it. I wondered if the two of them would make a good couple. Lance had been with women on and off when we were teenagers. I had no idea what his love life had been like in California when he’d worked there, but right now, I knew that his life revolved around work and work alone. Taking on a woman with a baby was a different story, of course, but he seemed to be very accepting of her.

  Maybe there was potential for something.

  If they did get together, we would be a full set of couples, with Alana and Andrew, and me and Vanessa already together. It could work well, in fact. Lance was a sucker for someone in need, a nurturer, as they called them.

  And Lily had a lot of need.

  It remained to be seen, of course, but it was something that could possibly work.

  When we were done with dinner, we cleared the table and cleaned up. We were a team, working together, and the feeling of family was in the air. We poured more drinks and headed out to the porch. Lance had built a swinging bench that he and Lily sat on. Andrew had Alana on his lap in one of the chairs, and Vanessa and I sat next to each other on another bench.

  The Mexicats had come out to join us. They were getting big. Lily had taken to Christopher, the little ginger, and she picked it up, stroking it. Lance scratched the cat behind its ear.

  I watched Andrew and Alana, who were cuddling Maria, the gray cat. Vanessa was playing with Guadalupe, and I noticed that there was one kitten for each couple. I tried to ignore the symbolism.

  Andrew and Alana looked happy. I had never seen my brother in such a good place. He was serious about Alana even though it was a very new relationship, and judging by how she looked at him, she felt the same. I wouldn’t be surprised if they ended up getting married. We had all grown up together, so they knew what they had in each other.

  I was serious about Vanessa, too. I didn’t know what the far future held for us, but I knew that right now, I wanted to hold onto her as tightly as I could.

  The night was beautiful—the sky an inky black with a vast expanse of stars stretching from one horizon to the other. I could taste the night on my tongue: it was that crisp. I could suck on it like a piece of candy, roll it around in my mouth. And I was happy.

  But I missed my mom terribly tonight. I wished she could have seen the lot of us together like this, making it work, living life the way she would have wanted us to do. I wanted her to see that Andrew had finally found love and that he was happy. I wanted her to kno
w that Vanessa and I had worked it out and that I was holding onto her like my mom had told me to because Vanessa was a good one.

  I knew my mom would have been happy that we had both settled down, that we had grown up and that we were taking life seriously, now. I wanted her to see it.

  Maybe it was because of her passing that Andrew and I had grown up. Circumstances had pushed us to do it. Maybe, if my mom had been alive, still, this wouldn’t have happened. Maybe it was because she had left us in charge of it all that we had risen to it and grown up enough to settle.

  I thought about it a lot. Sometimes, I wondered if my mom was up there somewhere, looking down at us, smiling and proud. Sometimes I hoped she was, that she knew what we were doing, how much of it was in memory of her and how much we were accomplishing.

  But no matter how much I missed her, I knew that she was in a better place. The suffering was over, there was no more pain, and she was with my dad again. When he’d died, it had been as hard on her as on the rest of us, but she had been strong for everyone else instead of giving up and mourning, too. Now she didn’t have to be strong.

  She was with my dad, and I was glad about that.

  When it got late, Lily announced she was going to the bunkhouse. Lance offered to walk her, and after bidding us goodnight, they left.

  “I think I have to get going,” Alana said, who still had to drive to town. She took her leave, and Andrew walked with her to her car, leaving me on the porch alone with Vanessa. We sat in the darkness together, side by side on the bench.

  “It’s nights like this that I wish your mom were here,” Vanessa said. So, she felt it, too.

  “You were close to my mom,” I said.

  She nodded, looking at me with those stunning eyes of her.

  “I was. It was so easy to like her.”

  I nodded. My mom had been that kind of person.

  “And the relationship with my mother was practically nonexistent, so she had sort of filled that role for me. I know it wasn’t a very long time that I’d known her, but she really impacted my life.”

  I nodded. I knew what she meant. My mom was the kind of person that everyone grew incredibly fond of. It was one of the things that had made her beloved by all. I wanted that in my life again. Vanessa was like her. Since the moment I had seen her, I had fallen for her in a way I had never felt about anyone else.

  I put my arm around her and nuzzled her neck.

  “Come to bed with me,” I said.

  Vanessa nodded, and I took her hand, leading her through the house. In the bedroom, I closed the door, and we got undressed. We lay under the covers together, wrapped in nostalgia and other emotions.

  “I love you, you know,” I said to Vanessa. In the darkness, it was suddenly so important to me that she knew that.

  She was quiet when I said it, but I didn’t mind. I just wanted her to know that. I pulled her against me, tightly. I wasn’t going to let her go. Not only because it was my mom’s last words to me, but because she was the type of person you held onto, no matter what.

  Thirty-Eight

  Vanessa

  On Monday morning, I was flustered. I had overslept—being in Ace’s arms with everything being alright again had caused me to sleep through my alarms. Even though I wasn’t late yet, I was damn close to it.

  I regretted the decision to get the job at the bank. I was grateful to Alana for suggesting it and putting in a good word for me, but now that we had come this far, I felt like I would be of more use at the ranch. There was so much to do, and everything here felt so cozy and close-knit now with everyone getting along as well as they did that I didn’t want to walk away.

  Even though Alana did it almost every day.

  “What’s wrong?” he asked me when I swore after pulling my hair with the hairbrush. It was tangled, and I was irritated with the whole thing.

  “I think it would be better for me to stay here,” I said.

  Ace watched me pull my hair into a bun. It looked very professional, very much like the person I used to be when I was still studying. The person I used to be when I was still living in Cleveland.

  “You know, you can stay,” Ace said. “We can deal with your financial stuff.”

  I shook my head. I had to do this. When I had taken the job, I had done it to be independent, to be responsible, to take care of my life. I had to remember that.

  “I have to do this,” I said. “Besides, it wouldn’t look very good if I get a job and quit right away. I don’t want to make a bad name around town when I plan on sticking around.”

  Ace grinned at that. “I like that you’re planning on sticking around,” he said.

  I glanced at him in the mirror I was using to put on my makeup and smiled.

  “I can run the ranch without you,” Ace added. “I know you’ve been around for a while now, but we’ll be okay.”

  I knew he was a right, but I was so conflicted and torn. The ranch had become my home in a way I hadn’t expected to ever have, and I didn’t want to leave it and invest my energy somewhere else. It sounded silly—it was just a job in town—but it was how I felt.

  I stepped back after doing my makeup and looked at the completed picture. I wore a dress suit, and my hair was up with more makeup that I’d worn in months. I wore heels, and the whole getup felt out of place and way too much.

  “You look hot,” Ace said behind me.

  “I feel like a trussed-up chicken,” I said.

  “I can help you get it off if you want,” Ace said and flashed me a devilish grin. I laughed.

  “You know how to break the tension.”

  Ace wiggled his eyebrows at me, and I laughed again. I walked to the bed, where Ace was still stretched out in only his boxers, and kissed him before sitting down. My mind was running through everything I was leaving behind, everything I would have done if I was here.

  “I’m worried about Lily,” I said. “She’s not coping.”

  Ace nodded. “I noticed she seems a little out of place. I think she’s doing okay, though.”

  “Yeah. But I’m worried about how she’s going to cope with everything with me not being here. Usually, when she gets stuck, I help her.”

  “Don’t you worry about that,” Ace said. I think she’ll be OK. Lance is looking out for her.”

  He was right, of course. Lance was the foreman, and he made a point of making sure everyone did their jobs well and knew what they needed to be doing. I was sure something was up between Lance and Lily as well. They were different toward each other than I’d expected of a working relationship. It was almost like Lance had taken it upon him to take care of Lily and make sure she was settled on the ranch. And she had accepted him as someone that would protect her and watch over her. The dynamic worked beautifully.

  But I couldn’t help worrying because I felt like I was going to miss out when I was gone.

  I checked myself in the mirror again. Nothing was out of place, and I felt ridiculously uncomfortable. I took off my shoes.

  “Do you think I should put on different shoes?” I asked. “Do you think heels are too much?”

  Ace shook his head. “You’re going to work at a bank. You look fine,” he said.

  I shook my head and exchanged the heels for flats. I looked in the mirror again, but with the pencil skirt, it looked wrong. I sighed and put my heels back on.

  “Stop fussing. You look fine,” Ace said.

  I shook my head. Nothing felt fine. I was irritated and frustrated, and I felt uncomfortable. I was going to a new job that I would probably be late for, that I didn’t want to do anymore, and I was leaving the place behind where I was really invested.

  When I looked in the mirror again, Ace laughed. I turned around and glared at him.

  “What’s so funny?” I asked.

  Ace shook his head. “You’re cute when you’re all worked up.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, thanks for that,” I said. “Your support is amazing.” My voice was thick with sarcasm.
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  Ace shook his head, still smiling. “Calm down, babe. It’s all going to work out. You’re too worked up.”

  “I’m worked up just the right amount,” I snapped. “It’s a new job.”

  “Yeah, a job. You don’t have to get your panties twisted about it.”

  I gasped, surprised that he would say something like that to me. I bent and picked up one of the flats I had considered wearing and threw it at him. Ace ducked, and I narrowly missed his head. It hadn’t been a very hard throw, but I was glad I’d missed him.

  “Don’t enjoy this so much,” I said when Ace sat up, laughing. He was having fun with this. We were playing. It was great that he was in a good mood, and it lifted my spirits a little as well.

  When Ace shifted, I noticed he was hard. His erection pushed his boxers up, and it was plain to see what was on his mind. I stared, my lips parted, and Ace glanced down before chuckling.

  “You’re all worked up,” I said.

  He nodded. “Yeah. You do that to me. You’re feisty and full of shit, and I like that.”

  I wasn’t sure if it was a compliment or an insult. Either way, I was turned on. And it was the worst timing. I shook my head, trying to get rid of the thoughts. I couldn’t afford to do anything now. I was running late.

  “I’m going,” I said. “I’ll be late if we carry on like this.”

  “Oh, come on. A quick one,” he said.

  “No,” I said. “I have to go. I love you.”

  I walked out of the door before he could stop me. I was on my way to the kitchen when Ace ran up behind. He caught up to me in the doorway to the kitchen, pulling me against him.

  “Say it again,” he said. He was grinding his cock against me, his eyes deep.

  “What?” I asked, breathless.

  “What you said just before you left. Say it again.”

  I smiled. “I love you,” I said. When he’d told me last night, I hadn’t said it back. But I said it now, and I meant it.