Shielding Aspen

by Susan Stoker

  She’d been looking into becoming an EMT when she’d happened to meet an Army veteran. He’d been a combat medic in Vietnam and, after hearing his stories, she’d decided to enlist in the Army herself and follow in his footsteps.

  “That couldn’t have been an easy decision,” Kane said between bites.

  Aspen shrugged. “It wasn’t a walk in the park, especially the special operations combat medic course. There were several times I didn’t think I was going to make it, and not just because of the physical requirements.”

  “Let me guess…the good-ol’-boy network?”

  Aspen nodded. “I know the Army has tried very hard to cut down on that kind of shit, but it’s just more hidden now. The other women in my class and I went through hell trying to gain the respect of both our instructors and our fellow medics.”

  “And now look at you,” Kane praised.

  Aspen smiled. “I’ve worked my ass off,” she admitted. “I know more than the average paramedic working on the streets does. I know the basics of dental medicine, I can perform extractions, studied large animal veterinary care, as well as the fundamentals of herbal medicine. Not only that, but I’m just as proficient with my weapon as anyone on the Ranger teams.”

  “And every day, you still have to prove yourself worthy of being there simply because you’re female, don’t you?”

  Aspen had no idea how Kane had such uncanny insight. She nodded. “It’s maddening and it pisses me off. I’m coming up on my reenlistment date, and I’m seriously wondering if I want to stay in, or if I want to get out and put my skills to use some other way. Somewhere they’d be appreciated more.”

  One thing Aspen really liked about Kane was how, when she spoke, he paid attention. He wasn’t fiddling with his phone or looking around like he was bored. He studied her and was completely dialed into their conversation.

  “You’d really get out?” he asked.

  Aspen shrugged. “Honestly? I don’t know. I really do like the Army. I like serving my country. But when soldiers with their shiny new Ranger tab find out that they have to serve alongside a woman, and they look down their noses at me, it gets old really fast.”

  Kane put his hand on her thigh. He didn’t grope her, simply lay his heavy hand just above her knee, lending his support. “I’m sorry you have to go through that. It sucks.”

  She also appreciated that he didn’t give excuses for the men she worked with.

  “Thanks. But…what about you? I already know you graduated high school early and got your degree young too. Where’d you grow up? Do you have any siblings? Where are your parents?”

  Aspen watched as his expression immediately closed off.

  Her stomach clenched. She hadn’t meant to ask anything that would upset him, but he obviously wasn’t all fired up to talk about himself.

  To his credit, he didn’t blow her off completely.

  “I’m an only child too. My parents were older when they had me. My mom was forty-two and my dad was forty-eight. I guess they thought she couldn’t get pregnant, then…surprise! They were both professors at Stanford and were thrilled beyond measure when I exceeded their expectations as far as being smart went. They hired private tutors for me when I was three or four, and from there, my entire life was about school.”

  “I bet they were proud of you,” Aspen offered uncertainly.

  “Oh, they were. Bragged about me to all their buddies. But when they pushed me to get my second master’s degree after I got my first, I was done. I was a skinny, uncoordinated kid with no friends. I’d spent my entire life studying. I wanted to get outside and have some fun. They weren’t happy when I told them I was done with school. That I was going to join the Army. They didn’t talk to me for years after that.”

  “I’m sorry,” Aspen said softly.

  Kane shrugged. “It wasn’t easy. I worked my ass off in basic and AIT. Even though I had a college degree, I wanted to be enlisted. I didn’t want to be an officer. I wanted to get in the dirt with everyone else. I got a lot of crap, but I didn’t care. For the first time in my life, I was doing what I wanted to do. I was happy. Tired as fuck, but happy.”

  “Did your parents forgive you?” Aspen asked.

  “Forgive?” Kane shook his head. “I don’t think so. But they’re resigned to the fact that their genius kid wants nothing to do with academia. The funny thing is, I’m using what they taught me and what I learned while living under their roof far more now than I ever would have if I’d taken the path they’d wanted for me.”

  Aspen was fascinated. “Like?”

  “Like the time we were in Africa. We were in the middle of the fucking jungle…lost, if you can believe that. And we stumbled into this village, and let’s just say the natives weren’t happy to see us at all. It took two days of me listening and watching, but I learned enough of their language to communicate. I reassured them that we were friends and weren’t there to hurt them in any way. By the end of day three, we were all sitting around a fire in our underwear, participating in some damn traditional friendship ritual.”

  Aspen giggled. She was thrilled when Kane returned her smile.

  “My friends weren’t kidding last night when they said I know over two dozen languages. Something in my brain just picks them up really fast. I can’t read all the languages that well, but I can speak and understand them. It’s come in very handy over the years.”

  “I can imagine,” Aspen told him.

  The rest of the evening was spent talking about less intense topics. What genres of books they liked to read, favorite music, their latest choices in cars, and what they’d drive if money was no object. They talked so long, the manager of the restaurant eventually came over and informed them they were closing.

  Aspen was shocked. Typically, she hated lingering over the table after eating. But she and Kane had talked for hours, yet it seemed as if she was just scratching the surface of getting to know him.

  And one thing she really liked was that they hadn’t talked about the Army the entire night. All Derek had seemed able to talk about was their jobs and politics.

  Kane handed his credit card to the relieved waiter and within a minute, the man was back with the bill. Not ashamed to watch as he signed the check, Aspen noted that Kane gave their patient waiter a generous tip. That was just one more thing to like about him.

  He stood and helped her up from the booth. When she was standing, he kept hold of her hand and walked her to the door. He stopped just outside to look around the parking lot. The restaurant was in a strip mall, so there wasn’t a huge parking area, but he still took the time to survey it for any hidden dangers before heading toward his car.

  Aspen didn’t complain. She knew exactly what he was doing; she was trained to do the same thing herself. She may not have worked with a Delta Force team before—they didn’t use combat medics, they relied on their own skills and training if the shit hit the fan—but she was trained to be observant.

  Aspen rested her head on the seat, and they were both silent as Kane took her back to her apartment. He parked and turned off his engine when he arrived.

  “Where do you live?” Aspen asked. She didn’t want the evening to end, but she knew no matter how many questions she asked, it eventually would.

  “I have a small house not too far from here.”

  “A house?” Aspen asked in surprise. “Not an apartment?”

  “Nope. I wanted to feel settled. I’ve got a ninety-one-year-old widowed woman who lives on one side of me, and a family with three kids on the other. There are kids playing outside all the time, as well as older couples sitting on their porches when the heat of the day dissipates. It’s…nice.”

  “It sounds like it,” Aspen said, somewhat jealous. She’d always wanted a home. A real home. But her life in the Army hadn’t really been conducive to that. Wracking her brain for something else to talk about, she gazed down at Kane’s arm. It was on the armrest between them, and she blurted, “You have great veins.”

/>   He blinked, then chuckled. “Uh…thanks?”

  Knowing she was blushing, Aspen ran a finger over the very prominent vein on his forearm. “It’s just something I notice now. It’s really hard to get an IV in some people, and when I see someone who has veins like yours, prominent, I can’t help but think about how easy it would be to stick you.”

  At his choked laugh, she looked up and realized what she’d just said. “Stick with an IV. Like, get a needle in your veins. Shit…I’m shutting up now.”

  Kane smiled bigger. “You’re fucking cute, cha-gee.”

  She wasn’t sure how to respond to that. She’d never been called cute in her life. She was too tall. Too muscular. But somehow, when Kane called her cute in the same sentence he called her darling, it seemed like the best endearment ever.

  “Can I call you tomorrow?” he asked.

  “I’d like that,” she told him.

  “Good. Me too. Come on. It’s late, and I’m sure you have to get up early for PT.”

  Feeling disappointed, but knowing their date had to end sometime, she nodded and got out of the car. Kane was there to meet her, and he took her hand and started walking toward her building.

  “You don’t have to walk me to my door.”

  “I know.”

  Aspen couldn’t help but smile. She liked the feel of his hand in hers. A lot. Nervous about what would happen at her door, she kept quiet as they headed to her apartment. Once there, she unlocked it and then turned, staring awkwardly at Kane.

  He smiled gently and brought his hand up to her face. He brushed her hair back behind her ear and his thumb caressed her cheek for a second before he dropped his hand. “I had a good time tonight, querida.”

  “Let me guess, Spanish?”

  He smiled. “Yup.”

  “I did too,” Aspen said.

  “I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Don’t let the assholes get you down,” he told her before taking a step away.

  “No kiss?” Aspen blurted.

  Kane shook his head. “If I touch those lips I’ve been staring at all night, I’ll never leave.”

  His words were matter-of-fact. He wasn’t flirting. Wasn’t trying to get her to smile.

  Aspen licked her lips and saw his pupils dilate as he watched. “But you are going to kiss me at some point, right?” she sassed.

  “Oh, yeah,” Kane breathed. “Count on it. Sleep well.”

  “You too,” she told him.

  “Go on. Get inside and lock the door. I’ll head out when I know you’re safely inside.”

  Aspen nodded and kept eye contact with him until the last second. She turned the deadbolt and latched the chain.

  “Good night, Aspen,” she heard him say, then his footsteps sounded as he headed back down the hall.

  Taking a deep breath, she put her back to the door and slid down until she was sitting on her butt with her knees drawn up. For just a second, she held her breath—then she smiled, huge, and squealed like she was a teenager again.

  Evidence was pointing to the fact that Kane was feeling the same chemistry she was. Thank God.

  Chapter Three

  The next week and a half were crazy busy for both Brain and Aspen. They hadn’t managed to get together again, but they had spoken on the phone at least once a day. One night they’d talked for over two hours, and another they’d only chatted for about ten minutes. And with every call, Brain felt even more comfortable with Aspen.

  They’d finally been able to make plans to get together two nights from now, a full two weeks after their last date, and he couldn’t wait. He was jittery and filled with anticipation about seeing her. Brain hadn’t felt like this about a woman before, and it both thrilled and scared him to death at the same time.

  The team had just gotten out of a morning-long meeting about the increasingly unstable situation in Afghanistan and were headed to lunch before returning to continue the discussion. Army brass were talking about the possibility of sending in troops to try to stabilize the area, and so far the Deltas weren’t on the list of special forces teams to be sent, but that could change at any minute.

  “Trigger?” Brain called as they all headed to the cafeteria on post.

  “What’s up?” his friend asked.

  “Can I talk to you for a sec?”

  “Of course. What’s wrong?” Trigger asked.

  “Nothing’s wrong,” he quickly assured him. “I just…I’ve been thinking about something a lot lately. How did you know Gillian was more than just another girlfriend?”

  Trigger’s shoulders relaxed as he realized Brain didn’t want to talk about a matter of national security. He waved to the others, letting them know they’d catch up soon. Then he turned back to Brain with a shrug. “There was just something about her. It was impossible for me to not think about her constantly. When we went down to Venezuela to take out those plane hijackers, and Gillian was forced to be their negotiator, she was so calm. Capable. There was no doubt she was scared out of her mind, but she was doing her best not to let it show. I was intrigued from the start. It was actually painful to leave her behind when the job was done, and I thought about her every day after.”

  Brain nodded.

  “Aspen?” Trigger asked.

  “Yeah. I admire her. Not only for being a badass combat medic who can keep up with a Ranger team, but for doing it despite how much harder it is because of her gender. Not physically, but because of all the shit she has to go through to prove she’s capable.”

  “And?”

  “And what?” Brain asked.

  “There has to be more to it. I mean, we’ve met a lot of women in male-dominated fields who are more than capable. What makes her different?”

  Instead of answering right away, Brain thought about his friend’s question for a moment. Why was Aspen different from other women he’d met? “She listens. I mean, really listens, and isn’t just waiting for her chance to take over the conversation. She’s also very nonjudgmental. I told her about my parents and how I grew up, and she didn’t even blink.”

  “If we go back this afternoon and are told we’re being sent on a mission in two hours, what would your first thought be?” Trigger asked.

  Brain inhaled sharply.

  “That,” Trigger pounced. “What was that thought?”

  “I’d want to call her. Tell her in person what was going on. Tell her that if she didn’t hear from me for a while, it’s not because I’m blowing her off.”

  Trigger nodded. “You’re not thinking about calling your neighbor to take care of your plants and gather your mail. You’re not running through scenarios that we could encounter on the mission. Your first thought is Aspen and making sure she’s all right, and that she understands why you’ll be out of pocket.”

  Brain nodded.

  “That’s how she’s different from other women,” Trigger told him firmly. “When your first thought is for her, whether she’ll be all right while you’re gone.”

  “I haven’t known her very long,” Brain argued.

  “Doesn’t matter. Just because you’re thinking she’s special doesn’t mean you’re going to get married tomorrow and have a dozen babies. My advice? Just go with it. Don’t overanalyze it. You want to talk to her? Call. You want to see her? Make it happen. Don’t pull the bullshit that us guys sometimes do in waiting a certain number of days before you call just so you don’t look so eager.”

  “Yeah, that’s not an issue,” Brain muttered.

  Trigger chuckled and clapped a hand on his friend’s back.

  “We’ve talked every night since we met,” Brain admitted.

  “Good. The best way to win a woman’s heart is by being her friend first. Let her bitch about her day, don’t offer to fix all her problems; generally, they just want someone to listen. But when it counts, stand up for her, and don’t let anyone give her shit. She might be strong and tough, but it always feels good to have someone in your corner when shit hits the fan.”

  Brain nodded. He
knew that better than anyone. He’d spent most of his childhood being alone. Kids his own age never wanted to play with him, and when he started high school and college, he was too young to have any true friends among his classmates. And while he didn’t know if Aspen needed someone at her back, he’d be there if he could. “Thanks.”

  “Anytime. Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m starving. Let’s go eat,” Trigger said.

  “I’ll be there in a second. Need to make a call first.”

  Trigger grinned. “I’m sure Gilly wouldn’t mind getting to know Aspen better at some point.”

  Brain gave his friend a chin lift in response. He wanted Aspen to get to know both Gillian and Kinley better, as well, but at the moment, he was feeling a bit selfish. He wanted to learn what made her tick before his friends did.

  He clicked on Aspen’s number and brought his phone up to his ear. He wasn’t sure if she’d answer or not, though he hoped she was able to get some lunch today and maybe was taking a break.

  But the phone rang four times and went to voice mail. He hesitated, wondering if he was being stupid. If he should hang up and just talk to her tonight. But before he’d decided, the beep sounded in his ear. “Hi. It’s me. Brain…er…Kane. We had a break for lunch and I thought I’d see if I could catch you. I don’t really have a reason for calling…other than to let you know that I was thinking about you.”

  He winced. God, he sounded like the nerd he was. “Anyway, I hope today’s going better than the past few. I’ll call later tonight. Bye.”

  He clicked off the phone and closed his eyes in disgust. He’d sounded like a complete dweeb. Sighing, he pocketed his phone and started across the parking lot toward the chow hall. He liked Aspen. A lot. But he didn’t have much experience when it came to relationships, and the last thing he wanted was to scare her away by hovering and seeming too desperate.

  But that was the thing, he felt desperate to talk to her. To find out how she was doing. If she’d found out any more information about her team deploying. He wanted to know what she was planning on having for dinner and what kind of television shows she might watch this evening.