Fate mba-2

by Аманда Хокинг

  By now, I knew it wasn’t her, but I wanted to play along with the game. Someone was in my room, and I wanted to alert Jack without letting anyone know I was alerting him. My heart had started panic, but I wasn’t sure if he would pick up on that if he was asleep.

  “Mattie?” I repeated.

  This time, I sat up, my eyes searching the darkness. I hoped to see her massive white shape lurking somewhere, but it was too dark for me to really make out anything. The night light from the bathroom cast very little light, but when it moved this time, I saw a glimpse of a shadow rush in front of it.

  Before I could yell for anyone, the bed moved, and whoever it was had gotten on the bed with me. I could scream, but by the time anyone heard, it would be too late for them to do anything. So I just sat in the darkness and waited for whatever came next.

  “Jeez, Alice, settle down,” a voice chuckled in the dark, only a few inches from my face. “You’re gonna give yourself a heart attack.”

  “What? Who’s there?” I demanded nervously, feeling around in the dark like a blind person. The voice sounded familiar and he seemed to know who I was, but I couldn’t place it, so it did little ease my fears.

  “Shame on you,” he said with a mock disapproval. “You don’t even recognize your own brother?”

  “Milo?” I asked incredulously, and then scrambled to turn on the bedside lamp.

  As soon as I saw him, I gasped. He looked like my brother, but not. The baby fat had been chiseled away to cheek bones and a strong jaw. His skin, while it had never been scarred by acne, was even smoother and more flawless. The changed had aged him, too, but in a good way.

  He no longer looked like a boy teetering on puberty but rather a man in his late teens who had never struggled through anything. His massive, beautiful brown eyes had some gotten even more amazing, but his crooked, unsure grin remained the same.

  “Milo?” I repeated, trying to decipher how my little brother had become this rather stunning young man before me.

  “The one and only,” Milo tried to keep his tone playful, but I knew my reaction made him nervous.

  His voice still sounded much like his own, but it was deeper and more velvet. It lacked the squeaky insecure quality that had once been so distinctly him.

  Before I could think to stop myself, I reached out and touched his face. His skin felt soft and temperate, but before I could register anything more, something flicked across his face and he jumped back from my touch.

  “What? Did I do something?”

  “I’m just not strong enough yet.” Milo shook his head and back closer to the wall, but stayed in my room, bathed in the soft lamp glow that I’m sure didn’t do his new features justice.

  “For what?” I asked quizzically.

  “You’re the first… human I’ve been around.” His face contorted, looking confused and torn. “I could smell you when I was in my room, and I thought I had a handle on that. But I wasn’t prepared for how your pulse would feel on my skin…” He looked guilty at finding me tasty, so I hurried to erase it.

  “I’m sorry. I should’ve known better. I’m always doing the same things to Jack, and you think I would’ve learned by now.” I forced a smile at him, but his expression only got more sour. “What?”

  “So… you know?” Milo asked quietly, and I wasn’t sure how to answer it.

  “You mean… that they’re vampires?” I replied carefully.

  “I knew that you must.” He looked passed me, staring into the darkness as he tried to figure things out.

  “As soon as I could start to understand what was happening, and Mae started to explain to me…

  She told me that you knew, and I knew that you must. But still, I guess I didn’t really believe until I heard you say it.”

  “Why wouldn’t you believe it?” I furrowed my brow, trying to understand what he was getting at. If he could believe that he was becoming a vampire, how would it be a stretch to believe that I had known about them?

  “How could you not tell me about this?” Milo sounded more angry and hurt that I had ever heard him before, and I flinched. At first, I didn’t understand, but then I remembered what Jack had said and what I had just read in Peter’s book.

  When vampires first turn, all their emotions are right at the surface. Everything is so much intense then it used to be before, making it harder to control. Admittedly, self-control had always been Milo’s strong suit, but that’s probably how he was able to even be in the same room with me after being so newly turned. It had been less than 72-hours since he drank Jack’s blood, and Ezra had claimed the change would take several days. Everything was really moving so quickly.

  “I-I didn’t know how to tell you,” I stuttered. “I even tried to once. But… you would’ve just thought I was crazy.”

  “You should’ve tried harder!” Milo snapped, his voice harder than I had even known it was capable of being.

  I stared at my brother, at the new exquisite hard contours of his face, and I couldn’t distinguish how I felt about him. There was an immense sense of relief and love, but there was this feeling that I didn’t really recognize the boy - man, really - who was glowering at me from the shadows of the room. I imagined this was how the dad felt when that creepy little boy came back from the Pet Semetary. As soon as the thought popped in my head, it was followed by the thick Maine drawl saying, “Sometimes, dead is better,” but I did my best to stifle the chill running over me.

  “I’m sorry,” I apologized earnestly. “I should’ve. You’re right. But believe me, it was so hard to keep this all from you. I never wanted to keep anything from you. I just…” I sighed and shook my head. “It was a hard decision. Just like this one.”

  “What one?” Milo’s eyes flashed with confusion, and I wondered nervously how much Mae had told him. Maybe he didn’t know that it had been my choice to turn him, and maybe he would hate me for it.

  “The one… to turn you,” I swallowed hard and studied his face for his reaction. His eyes were hard, then dropped from mine, and he softened. “Did they tell you what happened?”

  “Jack did,” Milo nodded grimly. “He said it was his fault, and I was dying. So you asked him to turn me. To save me.”

  “I didn’t know what else to do.” Tears stung my eyes, but I didn’t know why. Milo was alive and he was fine, or something close to it, but just remembering how close I had come to losing him made me want to sob.

  “I’m not angry with you,” Milo absolved me gently. “I’m sure I would’ve done the same thing in your situation. I just wish there had been some kind of heads up about what was going on around here.”

  “I’m sorry,” I repeated, blinking back tears.

  Milo shifted against the wall, and I noticed for the first time the way his clothes fit against his body. Even in that simple movement, I could see the way the muscles moved subtly underneath his shirt. He had never been fat before, but he’d never been trim either. Soft would be a good way to describe him, but now he looked a like jungle cat recoiled before an attack.

  “You’re a vampire,” I announced breathlessly. To know something is entirely different than to see it so obviously in front of me. Everything about him had changed, and only time could tell how much of him was still my brother.

  “I am,” Milo agreed with a wry smile.

  “How do you feel?”

  “Pretty amazing actually.” His smile widened and his stance broadened, making him look proud of this achievement. “At first, it hurt like hell and I was sure I was going to die. Or at least I hoped I would. But now… it feels better than I’ve ever felt.”

  “Really?” I asked hopefully.

  Naturally, I wanted him to feel good and be happy. But more than that, I wanted to know what was in store for me. With him turning, my own change had to be in the very near future. There was nothing holding me back anymore. I had been waiting through his turn to make sure that he got through it okay, and he had. So it was my turn next.

  “Yeah.�
�� Milo nodded, but his smile faltered. “Well, except for the hunger. It’s hard to get used to, but eating… Wow. There aren’t even words for it.”

  “So… you’re eating?” I felt cautious, even though I knew the answer. It was still too weird of a thought to completely reconcile, though.

  “If I wasn’t, I couldn’t be here with you.” There was a strange threatening sound to his voice, and I involuntarily shrunk back in the bed. “I’m not even supposed to be out of my room now. But I woke up hungry, and there were some blood bags in the room. Mae was completely passed out in the chair, and I was sick of being locked up.”

  “Why aren’t you supposed to be out?” I’d been scrutinizing him as soon as I could see him, and as far as I could tell, he looked perfectly fine. Better then fine, actually.

  “Because.” Milo shifted again, looking pained, but I waited for him to explain. He looked at me like I was an idiot, and shame washed over him. “They think I’m going to eat you.”

  “Oh.” I tucked a tangle of my hair behind my ear and hoped my voice stayed even. “Do… do you want to?”

  “I’m not going to!” Milo insisted, hurt. But he dropped his eyes guiltily to the floor. “I want to. It’s impossible not to.” Then he looked back up at him, his russet eyes full of warning. “Don’t kid yourself, Alice.

  They’re all thinking about it.” The idea seemed to be fresh to him, and he straightened up and looked warily at the door, as if he expected one of them to come running into the room at just that second to kill me. “It’s really not safe for you here.”

  “I think I’m pretty safe here,” I reassured him.

  “You have no idea.” His eyes widened a little bit, then narrowed. “Do you let them bite you?”

  “No.” I floundered uncomfortably under his judgmental gaze. “Well… it’s complicated.”

  “Not Jack.” Milo’s voice had gotten small and plaintive and… jealous. Definitely jealous. His crush on Jack was even more intense than it had been before. Milo had gone from defensive to protective, but it was hard to deny how much more powerful he was. Before when he tired to protect me, it was something of a joke, but just standing there talking to me, there was something menacing about him. He would do real damage to someone if he wanted to.

  “Not Jack,” I answered quickly, and I knew that I could never explain how Jack had tasted my blood once. There was a certain possessiveness to him, and I doubted that Milo wanted to share either of us with anyone, let alone each other. “It was once with Peter, but it was… a very difficult situation.”

  “What’s going on?” He stood up straighter, and he appeared to almost be sniffing the air.

  “Something just happened.”

  “What are you talking about?” I looked around the room, trying to figure out what he was freaking out about.

  “You. Something happened to you. You’re…” His eyes changed, and I recognized that burning hunger behind them. “Everything about you… It’s like… You want me to bite you?”

  “No!” I shouted, alarmed.

  Admittedly, since he was so new to this, there was a good chance that he could accidentally kill me if he bit me, but that’s not what had me so concerned. I remembered the way I had felt when Peter bit me, and while it was incredible, I definitely did not want my brother to make me feel that way. There was something tremendously incestuous about the idea.

  “I don’t understand.” His face betrayed the internal struggle going on within him, and when he took a step closer to me, it finally dawned on me that I could actually be in danger. “What did you do?”

  “I didn’t do-” But then I realized exactly what I’d done. I’d thought of Peter, and for some reason, my body turned itself into the most delectable thing a vampire could imagine every time I thought of him. It usually effected Jack the hardest, but since Milo was so new, he had no defense for it.

  “Milo!” Jack shouted, appearing in the doorway to his room.

  With a great effort, Milo pulled his eyes away from me, and he exchanged a look with Jack that I couldn’t read. They both looked rather intensely at each other, and there seemed to be some kind of conversation going on between them that I wasn’t privy to. Milo swallowed hard and his breathing had grown more labored, but he managed to keep his focus on Jack.

  “Go back to your room,” Jack told him calmly.

  He stepped off to the side so Milo could get by, and Milo complied reluctantly. When he went to pass him, Milo looked up at Jack, almost pleading with him for something, but Jack kept his gaze hard. Eventually, Milo shivered, and walked past him. Jack stayed frozen in the doorway until I heard the bedroom door shut as Milo went back into his room.

  “What the hell were you doing?” Jack turned back me, his voice suddenly full of venom.

  “I didn’t do anything!” I protested. “He came into my room while I was sleeping!”

  “You should’ve yelled for me or Mae!” Jack crossed his arms over his chest, but he wasn’t really angry with me. He was jus worried that Milo had been about to finish the job that Peter had started. “And you’ve got to stop thinking about Peter! Do you want get yourself killed?”

  “It’s so impossible!” I groaned and flopped back onto the bed. “You know, in the real world, it’s okay to just think about people! There’s not little mind police checking to make sure that your pulse hasn’t quickened or whatever stupid thing it is that I do!”

  “I know,” Jack sighed apologetically. “We’re just a little more sensitive then everyone else.”

  “What was that, by the way?” I looked back over at him.

  “What?”

  “That look you had with Milo. You were like… I don’t know. Really intense and… connected.”

  There was a weird pang of envy stabbing at me that I tried to ignore. “You guys aren’t like… lovers or something?”

  “No, no, of course not!” Jack laughed, and the clear sound of it made everything about me lighten and relax. “But we are more ‘connected,’ I guess. Because I turned him. It makes us a little closer.”

  “Oh.” I wasn’t sure exactly how I felt about that, but I knew that I’d better hurry up and get used to it because there’d be nothing I could do about. The one thing I knew for sure about vampirism is that it was permanent.

  “Are you okay?” Jack asked earnestly and walked closer to the bed to check on me.

  “If I said no, would you stay here with me longer?” I looked up at him hopefully.

  Seeing Milo, and then having him want to kill me, had shaken me, but I was mostly okay. But knowing that Milo was okay had taken this giant weight off my shoulders, and it made aware of how little time I’d really spent with Jack lately. Suddenly, I missed him terribly.

  “I shouldn’t…” Jack trailed off, but I already knew that I’d won.

  Lifting up the covers, Jack crawled into bed with me. Regrettably, he was wearing a tee shirt and pajama pants, but at least he was here with me, so I decided not to look a gift in horse in the mouth. I snuggled up next to him and relished the feel of his strong arms around me. Despite Milo’s earlier proclamation, I knew there was no where in the world I was safer than in Jack’s arms.

  “Everything’s gonna be okay,” Jack assured me, but that was his mantra anymore. He stroked my hair gently, and I rested my head on his chest, letting his heart thud slowly in my ear. “Milo’s going to be just fine.

  “He just has to adjust to everything.”

  “I don’t want to talk about adjusting or how everything is going be fine or okay or great in the future,” I grumbled tiredly. “I just want to lay here with you. And that be it.”

  “That’s a really good idea.”

  Jack finally settled into bed and I felt him relax with me. I fell asleep around him constantly. He made me feel safe and calm and I think I tired more easily than he did. But Jack and I very rarely got to fall asleep together, let alone curled up together in bed. The moments were few and far between, and I wanted to hang onto t
his one as long as I could.

  Unfortunately, it didn’t last as long as I would’ve liked. I fell asleep in the middle of enjoying it, and we were woken up much too soon. I had been in the middle of a dream, and then I heard someone clearing their throat loudly in the hallway. As I started coming to, I felt Jack’s arms start to pull away from me, and I clung onto them to tightly. He laughed quietly into my hair, but that only annoyed the interloper in the hall.

  “Ahem!” Mae coughed loudly.

  “What?” Jack groaned.

  “It’s time to get up,” Mae announced firmly.

  “But I’m still sleeping,” Jack yawned.

  “Too bad.” To enunciate her point, she clapped her hands loudly. “Get up!”

  “I’m up!” Jack insisted, and finally managed to free himself from me so he could sit up.

  “What do you think your doing?” Mae asked wearily.

  When Jack sat up, he cleared my view so I could see her standing in the hallway. She was wearing a rather fancy housecoat and she had her hands on her hips. She was tired and irritated, and just the way she looked at Jack made me feel guilty.

  “Getting up, like you asked.” Jack leaned back and stretched, and I watched the wonderful muscles of his back ripple underneath his tee shirt.

  “I meant, what do you do you think you’re doing in that bed, with her?” Mae nodded at me, but she never took her eyes of him. “Did you think that since you left the bedside lamp on it would make it okay?”

  “Kinda.” He smiled wickedly at her, but she was in no mood for it.

  “Get up. We all need to talk to downstairs.” Mae took a step away, but Jack stopped her.

  “Hey, hey. Did Milo tell you about his little exertion last night?” Jack asked, then his voice took a more accusing tone. “When he was on your watch?”

  “We’ll talk about that all when you get downstairs.” Mae turned sharply, her housecoat billowing behind her, and disappeared down the hall.

  “It’s way too early for a lecture,” I muttered into the pillow.

  “You’re telling me.”

  Jack looked back at me, and his expression softened with fondness. His smile deepened, growing more genuine, and gently, he reached over and brushed a hair back from my eyes. I’m sure my eyes were sleep clogged and red, but he looked into them like they were magical. His hand rested on my cheek for a moment, and it started growing warmer, but he let it linger.