Ashes and Ecstasy

by Catherine Hart

  “Let’s just hope we stay on the edge of it,” Kathleen said. “The Kat-Ann is carrying too much weight to withstand a major storm.” .

  “We may have to jettison some of the cargo,” Reed told her.

  Kathleen considered this a moment and nodded her assent. A smile found its way to her curved lips. “I suppose we could start with Uncle Haviland’s portrait. He always seemed such a stern, forbidding character. Besides, he was some distant relation on the Haley English side of the family, and therefore not in my favor at the moment.”

  Reed laughed and shook his head. “I doubt that throwing old Haviland overboard will lighten the load much.”

  “No, but we could start there and work up. If nothing else, it gives me a good excuse to get rid of the oppressive thing!”

  Luck was with them after all. Though the Kat-Ann was tossed about like a matchstick on a pond, they stayed on the edge of the storm. The rain came down in torrents, creating a thick curtain that made visibility impossible beyond a few feet. Throughout the hours it took to weather the storm, Kathleen and Reed stayed on the bridge. Rain and waves drenched them as they stood together at the helm. They’d taken the precaution of lashing themselves to the wheel, and Kathleen stood in the shelter of Reed’s arms as together they rode out the storm. Rather than being frightened, Kathleen was exhilarated. As the wind and waves rose, so did her spirit, until she felt at one with the sea and the elements. Her face shone as if she’d just been handed the most precious of gifts. She glowed with a sort of peaceful tranquility and joy, like a captive bird suddenly set free. As the Kat-Ann fought her way through deep troughs and over mighty crests, Kathleen rode her own high wave of exultation, transported for a time into a world consisting only of herself, Reed, and her beloved sea.

  As Reed stood behind her, his arms straining with hers to keep the wheel steady, he was reminded of another time he and Kathleen had ridden out a hurricane together. Then she had been disguised as the piratess Emerald, bold as brass, with hair dyed black as midnight. Then, as now, she had been energized and enthralled by the storm; vibrantly alive, yet at the same time somehow peacefully mesmerized.

  “We’re crazy to be enjoying this!” he shouted over the noise of the storm.

  Tilting her head back to look at him, she laughed.

  The breath caught in his throat as Reed gazed down at her rapt face. Here she stood, drenched to the skin, her hair straggling in her face, and he’d never seen her more enchanting. He kissed a drop of rain off her nose, and she snuggled more closely against his broad chest. At this moment Reed knew he loved Kathleen with all his heart, and would for the rest of his life. Surely he could never feel this way about any other woman; no other woman could ever compare to Kathleen. She had completely bewitched him, and he loved it.

  The remainder of the voyage was calm and sunny. The final hurdle before reaching Savannah was to successfully run the English blockade along the Georgia coast. Fortune blessed them with a black, moonless night, and their arrival coincided with a high tide in their favor. Reed guided the Kat-Ann unfalteringly up the Savannah River, past islands and around sandbars as familiar to him in the dark as by daylight. It was in the wee hours of the morning of September eighteenth that the Kat-Ann slid silently into her berth at the base of Savannah’s white-bluffed port. They were home at last.

  As much as he wished, Reed could not go directly home with Kathleen, Isabel and the children the next day. He stayed in town to see to the unloading of the Kat-Ann’s cargo and the housing of the passengers. Kathleen’s Aunt Barbara and Uncle William Baker insisted that he stay with them while in town. Reed readily agreed, since it gave him the opportunity to discuss business with their son Ted, his sister Susan’s husband. Ted and Susan had a two year old son, and were expecting another child in December.

  When Reed had relocated the shipping firm from Ireland to Savannah, Ted had expressed interest in helping to run the operation. The brothers-in-law worked well together. Ted, with a good head for figures, managed the offices and warehouses. While he knew next to nothing about sailing a ship, he had a sharp mind for business. Most people wondered why he had not followed in William’s footsteps and become a lawyer, but while Ted admired his father immensely, law had never interested him.

  On the other hand, Reed had sailed for years, captaining vessels first for other owners, and finally his own fleet. There was little he did not know about ships and ports, cargos and the sea. He devoted his time to seeing that all eight frigates were kept in good repair, hired the captains and crews, charted their courses and determined what merchandise was to be bought and sold in which ports, and saw to the loading and unloading of goods. At any given time Reed knew where each of his ships was, who was captaining which run, and which frigate would dock in Savannah at what time.

  With both the plantation and the shipping firm to run, Reed was more than happy to let Ted handle the management of the office and warehouses. Paperwork bored him, and he appreciated having Ted to rely upon, knowing his young brother-in-law was not only capable, but honest.

  Unable to stay away from the sea for long, Reed would occasionally take one of the voyages himself. Sometimes Kathleen would accompany him as she had this time. Their mutual love of sailing was one of the many things they shared. Reed’s responsibilities to his family and home kept him tied to shore more now than he’d been used to before his marriage. Not that he regretted his commitment to Kathleen and his children, but he could not spend as much time aboard ship as when he was younger and more carefree. But Reed knew Kathleen understood his love affair with the sea, for she, too, was under its hypnotic spell. Neither of them could resist its call for long.

  While Reed saw to business in Savannah and caught up on news of the war with Britain, Kathleen took Isabel and the children on to Chimera. The Taylor plantation was but a few hours’ ride outside the city, along the southern bank of the Savannah River.

  The house itself was large, bright, and airy, and Kathleen had loved it on sight. To her, Chimera was beautiful to behold; warm and welcoming. This was home, all the more precious now since she’d lost her estate in Ireland. After greeting her mother-in-law, Mary Taylor, and introducing Isabel, Kathleen set about getting her friend settled in one of the spacious guests suites. Once Della put the children to bed for their naps, Kathleen sat down with a soothing cup of tea to hear all the news from Mary.

  “I can’t tell you how relieved I am that you are home again, Kathleen,” Mary told her. “I’ve worried that you might not make it back safely now that war has begun.”

  “We started home as soon as word reached us, Mary. You should know wild horses couldn’t have kept Reed away once he’d heard.”

  Mary nodded. ‘‘I’ve missed you all terribly! Lands, I swear those children have grown a foot since you left!”

  “So has Susan’s little Teddy,” Kathleen pointed out. “I was so surprised to find Susan so far along with child. It made me realize how long we’ve been away. She wasn’t even expecting when we sailed.”

  “Now that you are home, I’ll stay a few weeks and spend time with Andrea and Katlin. Then I shall be going to Savannah to stay with Susan until after her baby is born,” Mary added.

  Kathleen smiled. “She’ll like that, I know. It was sweet of you to take such good care of me when Andrea and Katlin were born. I don’t know if I’ve ever properly thanked you for that, but I appreciate it more than I can say.”

  “You are like my own daughter, Kathleen,” Mary said, gently waving aside Kathleen’s words of gratitude. “That is what mothers are for.”

  After being brought up to date on everything that had happened at Chimera during their absence, and all the local gossip about friends and neighbors, the talk turned once more to the war.

  “They’ve started rebuilding old Fort Wayne, and there is talk of building another where Fort Greene stood before the hurricane of 1804 destroyed it,” Mary mentioned with a frown.

  “It was too dark to notice anything last
night when we arrived, but on the way out here today, I saw quite a few slaves digging ditches of some sort. What is that all about?” Kathleen asked.

  Mary explained, “The town fathers decided we should have earthworks built around the city; hence the trenches.”

  A worried look passed between the two women. “Perhaps you should think about moving into town, too, Kathleen,” Mary suggested. “It might be safer for you and the children.”

  “We’ll see,” Kathleen replied slowly. “I want to see what Grandmother Kate is going to do, and what Reed suggests.”

  That afternoon, Kathleen rode over to Emerald Hill, her grandmother’s plantation adjoining the Taylor holdings. Kathleen had been named after her grandmother, and the resemblance between the two was striking. Though Kate, who had just celebrated her seventieth birthday, now displayed more grey hair than red, her green eyes still sparkled just as brightly. Her Irish brogue still lingered on her tongue after nearly two decades in America, and her active mind and quick sense of humor had not dimmed with the passing years. Kate O’Reilly was very active in Savannah society, and had taught Kathleen the art of horse breeding at Emerald Hill when Kathleen had first arrived in Savannah.

  It nearly broke Kathleen’s heart to tell her grandmother that the estate which had been in their family for centuries was no longer theirs. There was no way to soften the blow.

  “Gran, I’m so sorry, but there was nothing we could do. Mr. Kirby did say that after the war is over, perhaps we could petition the King for its return.”

  Her green eyes misting with sentimental tears, Kate shook her head sadly. “Don’t be blamin’ yerself, lass. ’Twould have been lost years ago if yer father hadn’t come along and married yer mother when he did. Maybe ’tis best the last ties have been broken. We’re Americans now, and have our land and lives here. O’course, I’m saddened by the news. There’s a wealth o’ memories wrapped up in thet place, both good and bad. ’Tis glad I am thet I didn’t go back with ye t’ visit. Now I’ll always be rememberin’ it jest the way we left it, Sean and I.”

  “I did bring back the plants you wanted, and a few other things, like the silver and the portraits and such,” Kathleen offered, hoping to ease the older woman’s grief.

  A glow lit Kate’s face. “Did ye now? And what of the O’Reilly banner?”

  Kathleen nodded. “It’s in one of the trunks Reed will be sending from Savannah. I tell you, Gran, I was so furious that I left not so much as a broomstraw for Ellerby. What I couldn’t bring back with me, I gave to the crofters. I even brought the door knocker!”

  Kate laughed. “Kathleen, me own, ye’re Irish through and through! I’ll not be believin’ a drop o’ English blood runs in yer veins, not matter what yer Aunt Barbara says.”

  “And proud of it, Gran,” Kathleen proclaimed. She then proceeded to tell Kate everything that had transpired. In the end, as Kathleen had predicted, Kate agreed to hire many of the Irish croftets who had come to Savannah with them.

  “Aye, ’tis time t’ even out the odds a bit. All o’ Scotland seems t’ be wantin’ t’ settle here, and we need some good Irish stock t’ balance the scales. There’s no one better with horses than an Irishman, and I’d be willin’ t’ bet Reed would agree thet there’s none t’ compare with Irish whiskey and Irish women either,” she boasted with a broad wink.

  Reed arrived home full of news of the war and his plans to aid the American cause. “Do you realize that what the United States calls its naval protection consists of sixteen frigates and sloops of war; this pitted against nearly six hundred British naval vessels?” He was incredulous and incensed at the same time.

  Kathleen felt chills dance up her backbone. She and Mary shared a dismayed look across the dining table. Kathleen knew what Reed would say next, and she barely choked back a groan.

  Reed did not notice her reaction. “President Madison is calling on all owners of seaworthy vessels to help balance the odds. We have three frigates in port now, and two more expected this week, one of them the Starbright. Since the Kat-Ann and the Starbright are already heavily armed, we’ve only the others to worry about.”

  “Meaning you intend to add more guns to the other frigates before they sail again,” Kathleen stated.

  “Yes.”

  “Does that also mean that you intend to use them as warships instead of cargo vessels?”

  The tense tone of her voice finally registered, but Reed met her intent gaze steadily. “For the most part, yes. We may use one as a blockade runner, if needed. I’m not sure yet.”

  Her appetite completely gone, Kathleen pushed her plate away from her. “Which frigate will you be captaining, Reed?” she asked softly.

  Blue eyes locked with green, registering the multitude of emotions each was feeling in that moment. Like most men, Reed’s first reaction had been an immediate thrill of patriotism and anticipation at engaging in battle with the enemy. Now, as he saw the worry on Kathleen’s face, he realized all that this war could cost. In that moment, he faced his own mortality, and his fragile hold on life and happiness.

  Kathleen was facing her own fears for his safety, and at the same time she felt a distinct twinge of jealousy. She envied Reed the freedom and excitement of fighting the British from the deck of a ship. For just a second she hated him for daring to risk his life and their future together, and also for the very fact that he was a man and had the freedom of choice denied her as a woman.

  Above all, she felt torn by her love for him. A part of her was bursting with pride that he would brave the dangers of war to defend his country and his family, and she yearned desperately to be able to stand at his side while he did so. The other side of her despaired his absence, already missing him; even now she was gnawed by fear that he might be seriously wounded or killed.

  Reed’s reply was equally soft, but determined. “I’ll be taking the Kat-Ann. ”

  Unconsciously, Kathleen fingered the necklace at her throat, as if it was making it difficult for her to breathe. “When will you be leaving?”

  Regret and male pride mixed, making Reed’s reply brusque. “I expect to sail early next week. There are a few things I need to catch up on in order to leave the business in Ted’s hands and the plantation running smoothly under your supervision and Mother’s.”

  “I see.” Blinking rapidly, Kathleen barely held back her tears. “In other words, your mother and I are to keep the home fires burning until your return.” She could not keep the sharp edge from her voice. The slight hesitation gave weight to her next words, as she added, “If you return.”

  Mary Taylor paled visibly, and her choked gasp was clearly heard in the silence following Kathleen’s words. She gazed helplessly from Kathleen to Reed as they sat locked in silent combat. Seconds ticked by, endlessly long, before Reed spoke.

  “I have to go.”

  Kathleen swallowed hard. Pushing her own pride aside, she begged, “Take me with you!”

  “I can’t.” His eyes pleaded with her to understand.

  “You won't, ” she countered angrily, two plump tears wetting her cheeks. Her chin jutted out stubbornly.

  “All right, I won’t,” Reed conceded with a slight nod of his head. He waited, and when she failed to comment or soften in her manner, he pushed his chair from the table. “Would you have me be a coward, Kat?” he asked.

  “No, but I want to be with you.”

  “And I want you here.” With that, he strode from the room.

  Kathleen alternately cursed the war, the British, Reed, and the world in general in the following days. Reed took up where she left off. Kathleen’s attitude angered him, but he often had occasion to regret his sharp words to her.

  Mary and Isabel constantly found themselves trying to smooth ruffled feathers and calm edgy tempers. Also cast in the role of peacemaker, Kate O’Reilly could have banged Reed and Kathleen’s heads together.

  “Two stubborn fools, that’s what they are,” she complained to Mary. “They should be treasurin’ these
precious days together instead o’ hissin’ and clawin’ at one another.”

  Mary folded her hands together in her lap and sighed heavily. “They’ll work it out,” she predicted hopefully. “One thing that helps is that Reed hopes to stay within a few days of Savannah much of the time. He wants to concentrate on harassing the British blockade along the coastline from Charleston to the Floridas. He’ll be able to come home often, and if the British try to attack Savannah, he may be able to warn us in time for Kathleen to leave Chimera and get the children to safety. That, at least, relieves my mind somewhat. It bothered me that you and Kathleen would be alone out here, knowing that the British would reach Emerald Hill and Chimera before Savannah.”

  Kate chuckled, her emerald eyes alight with life. “Kathleen told me she refused t’ go t’ Savannah t’ stay, and I have t’ agree with her. I’ll not be leavin’ Emerald Hill, either, unless I absolutely must.”

  Mary eyed the older woman in exasperation. “I know where Kathleen gets her stubborn streak, Kate. She inherited more than her looks from you! To quote your granddaughter, she’ll be hanged if she’ll let those bloody British run her out of a second home.”

  “Aye,” Kate agreed. “She’s still hurtin’ over losin’ her Irish lands.”

  “That, and the fact that she has to remain behind while Reed is gone,” Mary added. “She’s having a harder time accepting that than anything else for some reason.”

  Kate could have told Mary why, but she kept still. Kate alone, of all their friends and relatives in Savannah, knew of Kathleen’s escapades as Emerald. No one else was aware of her dual identity except Kathleen’s friend Eleonore and the Lafitte brothers, and they were all in New Orleans now. If Kathleen had confided in Isabel, the young woman had not mentioned it to anyone.